Title: Role Models of Page Conduct

Author: Chris F.

Disclaimer: The characters belong to Tamora Pierce. I have taken slight liberties with the timing of events.

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Note: This fic is set during Squire, when Jon tells Gary to take over the page training in the gap between Wyldon quitting and haMinch arriving.

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Keladry of Mindelan knew she shouldn't eavesdrop. She knew it very well, in fact, and usually she would just ignore whatever happened in the next room. Raoul was entitled to his own private life, the same as she was entitled to hers.

It was just that Sir Gareth had made such a DRAMATIC entrance into Lord Raoul's room. He'd thrown open the door, yelled "Where are your weapons? You need to kill me before the pages do," and slammed the door shut again once inside. Kel decided that if the king's closest advisor was about to die, something big must have happened, something that might concern the Own, and that was her justification for pressing her ear almost against the door to hear the conversation in the next room.

Raoul's voice was mock-sympathetic. "You poor boy. Are you letting ten-year-olds best you?"

Gary sighed loudly. "I'm not letting them do anything. They're doing it all by themselves." There was a loud thud, almost as if someone was falling onto a bed. "And I'll have you know that some of them are thirteen."

"Which still gives you about twenty-seven years on them." There was a softer creak that Kel recognized as the sound beds make when faced with the bulk of Raoul sitting on them. "Really, though. Are you going to survive?"

"No." Gary's voice was flat. "I'm going to die. I survived the Sweating Sickness, two wars, an earthquake at the coronation, Duke Roger, and advising Jon for the past twenty years. I got through all that but these pages are going to kill me." He paused. "We weren't that bad, were we? We listened to the training masters and didn't try to skewer each other with practice swords and we weren't that loud. Right?"

Raoul's reaction started with a quiet chuckle, then grew into laughter, and gradually became what sounded suspiciously like hysterics. This went on for far longer than Kel thought appropriate, given the comment. Finally, Raoul started to catch his breath. "Oh, that was good," he gasped. "Really good. Yes, Gary, we were role models of page conduct. Your father always seemed to think so. What was it he said after you and Jon got into a duel while serving tables?"

Gary groaned. "I think it was something having to do with him wanting to kick me out, but realizing that would mean he'd have to watch me all the time, and he didn't want to do that."

Raoul kept snickering. "And the time you talked Alex into helping you paint indecent pictures on Ralon's walls. That was appropriate page conduct."

"Oh, you are so funny." Gary said dryly.

Raoul pressed on. "Oh, I know! You, me, and Francis, out in the courtyards trying to break the staffs because we thought that might keep us from having to practice with them the next day."

That got a tiny snort out of Gary. "I think we're still on restriction for that actually."

Raoul laughed again. "Yeah, I think you're right." He sighed, sounding slightly wistful. "It's a miracle we made it to the Chamber alive. I was sure someone would kill us before then."

Gary laughed weakly. "No. My mother would have killed my father if he would have killed us. I don't see why, though. She should have understood what little monsters pages are."

"It's only for a few more days." Now Raoul's voice was more genuinely soothing. "You just have a few more days to get through, then you can get back to your desk and your papers and your books and your dust."

"Thank the gods for that." There was a shifting sound like Gary rolled over. "You're off on scout duty for the progression soon, aren't you?"

Raoul sighed. "Yes. It could be worse, I'm sure. I could actually be in the progression."

Gary snickered. "Right, which would interfere with your hatred of people."

"Hey," Raoul protested, "I like people. I like the Third Company. And I like Kel." Even though she knew this already, Kel felt a warm rush go through her at the words. "I put up with you, don't I?"

"And I appreciate it very much." Gary yawned. "I suppose the Court gossips would just have fits if I fell asleep in here."

Raoul sounded slightly tired when he answered. "They've just started the Buri rumor. I don't think they'd know what to do with themselves."

There was a shuffling sound. "Is there any truth to that one?" Raoul's answer was apparently non-verbal, and Gary cheered. "That's great! You need a woman in your life to keep you straightened out."

Raoul expressed his opinion on Gary's own marriage using a term Kel had previously only heard from the lower ranks of soldiers. After Gary's protests to the contrary were done, he continued talking. "If you're getting tired, you should probably go collect sympathy from Cythera. I have a lot of paperwork to do."

"That's probably a good idea." There was the sound of Gary standing. "If you hear about me committing the mass murder of pages, I'd like it if you spoke in my defense."

"You can count on me." Raoul stood as well, and the bed sounded like it was very grateful. "I'll see you once this ridiculous show is over with."

"I'll try to still be sane when you get back."

Raoul laughed. "You aren't even sane now."

Left without a parting shot, Gary opened the door and left Raoul's room. Seconds later, Kel heard a knock on the door. She sprung up to open it. "Sir?"

Gary smiled at her. "Hello Squire Keladry. This may seem an odd request, but could you help Lord Raoul with his paperwork? I'm afraid he may have more than he can handle."

Kel blinked at him. "Of course, sir. I always help my lord." She considered whether she should continue. "Sir?"

Gary tilted his head. "Yes?"

Kel swallowed hard. "I mean no disrespect, but perhaps the pages might like you more if you shared some of your own experiences as a page. It would help them to relate to you, so they wouldn't think of you as just a..." she trailed off before she could say something offensive.

Gary raised an eyebrow. "A what? Go ahead, say it."

She stared down. "A desk knight, sir."

The hints of a smile touched Gary's lips. "I'll keep that in mind. Thank you." He paused, considering his own conversational options. "It's good that you are Lord Raoul's squire. You remind me of him."

Kel couldn't bite her tongue fast enough. "Sir, is that a compliment or a criticism?"

Now Gary smirked. "At the moment, it's both, although that could change at any given time." He raised a hand in farewell. "Enjoy the progression."

"I will." Kel watched Gary leave, then ducked into Raoul's room to help him with the paperwork. For the rest of the night, Kel was treated to some of the most interesting and bizarre stories about Raoul's training that she'd ever heard.