"Come on Rikki nothing is going to happen, I swear to you, and if something
happens I will protect you."

Thanks mom, to you and heaven,
For letting me live,
Here in your belly,
And later be born.
For loving me on the outside.
Like I loved you from the inside.

Positive.

'Rikki how stupid were you when you decided to sleep with Zane without protection? Oh I'm an idiot how am I supposed to be a mom at seventeen? What am I going to do? What I will say to my dad and friends? What am I going to say to Zane? He says he loves me, he said that if i got pregnant, he was going to protect me. He is the father, he has to help me. I have to let him know what is going on.

You know mom, today i heard you again!
You were arguing with someone with a deep voice,
And later you were crying for me, because of him,
Saying that i was going to be a nuisance for both of you

"Zane I need to talk to you in private please."

"Okay! Honey, whatever you want." Zane smiled at her as they walked away,

"Well Zane I didn't get my period last month.." I started off,looking
down at the floor,

"So you have to buy a pregnancy test." Zane told me, smiling,

"I already did Zane..."

"And what was the result?"

"Zane I'm pregnant with your baby."

"Rikki do you have any idea what you're saying?! I can't be a father at my age, why didn't you take the pill? This is all your fault! You have to have
an abortion, I won't take care of this baby, Rikki you won't have this baby."

"But Zane i can't do that and by the way you were the one who insisted we didn't use protection, this is our responsibility." I said with tears
rolling down my face, I couldn't believe what I was hearing,

" But you told me you were going to protect me if i got pregnant..." I whispered

"Oh come on Rikki I said that because i just wanted you to accept what i was saying, I wasn't thinking in that moment,. Just have the abortion, do
what I say, it's easier for the both of us." Zane told me,

"I can't believe you Zane! I though you loved me, thought you cared for me but I was wrong all the time, you are an idiot!"

"Oh come on Rikki!" Zane told me while i was leaving,

My life is falling to pieces, and it is because of this baby, maybe Zane is right this baby is only going to be a nuisance.

How are you mom I'm here once more
Hearing you arguing with him again
I am starting to think that you agree with him,
And maybe I won't be born...

And here I'm again arguing with Zane about what to do with this baby. I haven't told my dad or my friends and i don't think i can tell them. I know my dad is going to be so disappointed, he trusted me and he can't afford another person in the house, and there are my friends they will think
that i'm dumb, and i'm going to be the conversation of the town and scool, people will hate me i'm going to be the stupid, pregnant girl. Zane is right it will be more easy if i go into an abortion

Maybe you are right mom
You know about this things
You have lived and I never have,
I won't be a nuisance i swear to you mom
God will love us equally..

Yeah. Zane is right this baby doesn't have to born. I don't have a job and neither does Zane. What kind of life is that for a baby? It's better if I
have an abortion...

"Zane i have been thinking about this situation and i made a decision. I won't have the baby, you're right. I'm going to have an abortion.'

"See honey i told you! I will fix an appointment and next week you won't be pregnant. Everything is going to be perfect again, our lives are going to be normal again this is going to be our secret just between you and me."

I believe mom, I believe in God and you
But i noticed a puncture, a large needle,
It hurt and now i know that i won't be a nuisance at all,
I won't see you, and now bathed in blood I am leaving you.

And here I'm with the doctor, i don't like the look on his face, i don't like him, but i have to do it he says that this is not going to be painful for me, but what about the baby? Just do it Rikki, I can feel my whole body shaking as I think about what I am doing,

"Don't worry lady, I have done this so many times. When you wake up you won't have nothing inside you anymore!" The doctor said,

Good bye mom i will pray for you
From here i forgive you even i've never saw you
I'm leaving mom the blood fills me
I know i'm never going to talk to you anymore.

And here I am, laying on a hospital bed almost dead because the "expert" wasn't exactly and expert. Zane paid for the cheapest doctor he could find and two nights later i woke up bleeding and burning in fever, but i deserve this, i deserve the silence of Emma and Cleo, i deserve the look of sadness and deception from my dad. I should have known they were going to support me but my insecurity and Zane's words were stronger.
I'm really sorry but this won't bring my baby back i hope God will forgive me one day.

I hope my baby will forgive me.
I am just as bad as that doctor and Zane.
Unfortunately, I live in a society where what is not loved is killed...
And I will have to live with this for the rest of my life.