Alive

I…

I feel so alive

For the very first time

I can't deny you

Now that I know you

I could never turn my back away

Now that I see you

I could never look away

Now that I see you

I believe no matter what they say

The world is grey outside, damp, dark, and bleak. Trees rush past us, their leaves reaching out to us like the soft caresses of a lover. Today it isn't raining, but the greenery drips with moisture all the same. The fog, both in and outside of my mind blurs the forest into one solid color.

Your hair flies into my face as you run, but it doesn't bother me in the slightest. I lean in, press my face to the back of your neck, and breathe. Your scent greets me like an old friend. Always familiar, unforgettable.

I don't realized we have stopped until you are pulling me around to face you. My legs are still wrapped around your waist, a perfect fit. You drape a hand around my neck and pull me slowly to you until our lips meet and lock in a sweet slow kiss. Our lips move in a well practiced, synchronized rhythm. An unseen smile, a nod and I nip at you bottom lip.

You push me away softly, a bit hesitantly, because you have too many limits and I don't have enough. Your eyes shine with a lust that has nothing to do with our proximity. My hands fist into the unyielding leather of your jacket unsatisfied and you set me down on the ground slowly to take the backpack from my shoulders. From the bag, you retrieve a soft lavender colored picnic blanket.

The grass is covered in a thick layer of dew. The moisture collects in my palms as I run my hands of the tall blades of grass. A single flower stands among the tall grass, it is a late blooming, slightly wilted splash of color among waves upon waves of deep emerald foliage.

Little white hairs tickle the pads of my fingers as I feel along the thin neck of the wildflower. The color is deep and dark at the base where the petals are all clustered together, but fades evenly to white along the ends of the petals.

You pull gently at my waist, and lower me into your lap fluidly. You look into my eyes, I look back, I don't blink, or feel the heavy mist lifting or notice the clouds drifting apart steadily. I look into your eyes and feel my heart constrict painfully in my chest. Dread and anguish run through my body, as I realize that I am not good enough for you, and never will come close to what you deserve…and yet you continue to love me.

I swallow the lump in my throat and breathe, because I'll take what I ever you give me and as long as you ant me around I'll always be here. I blink back the tears welling at the corners of my eyes. You tilt your head to the side a little, your eyes are worried and you seem as though you want to say something, but you don't. You smile and pull my closer.

I look away for a moment, and glance up into the sky just in time to witness the grey clouds relinquish their hold on the sun, and light pours through. It is painfully bright, but as my eyes adjust, I marvel at how beautiful the light is, bending and bouncing off the trees and grass and leaves alike. I can see a handful of wildflowers sporadically dotting the edges of the meadow. A rainbow splits the sky in half like a bridge across an ocean of blue suspended above our heads.

You sigh as the soft rays of sunlight hit your face and the sight takes my breath away. The sun dims, the lovely wildflowers pale and wilt in comparison to your beauty. Your eyes shift down and roam over my face taking in every detail. Ladybugs buzz and butterflies flutter, but I don't hear them, I don't see how natural and comforting they look, because just then you mile and I swear my heart stops.

I can't control myself. I don't breathe as I reach up to brush your hair out of your eyes and run my fingers through the silky strands. I'm afraid that if I don't touch you with my own fingers, that you might not be real. You might disappear with a puff of smoke.

Birds are whistling, singing, and calling to each other in their own languages but I can't hear it because you chuckle quietly and it sounds so beautiful that I feel tears prickling from behind my eyes. Listening to anything other than your voice would be wasteful and idiotic. I could care less about anything but you, I'm too far gone to care about anything else.

I would have been content to listen to the harmonic sound of your laughter for the rest of the afternoon, but then you speak, and the breath comes back into my lungs with a harsh squeak. Your chest vibrates, your glorious lips part, and a voice that would put a chorus of angels to shame escapes. My eyes widen slightly as I make sense of your words.

"Bella"

Yes?

You point a finger to the sky, "Look."

I shake my head, I'd much rather look at you. Your face is calm as it shines and glitters as if every diamond in the world had been fitted into the pores of your skin.

"It's gorgeous." I say, though I do not really mean the view.

"Not as much as you." You say before embracing my lips with your own and send me into blissful unawareness.

Sunshine upon my face
A new song for me to sing
Tell the world how I feel inside
Even though it might cost me everything

Now that I know this, so beyond,

I can't hold this

I can never turn my back away
Now that I've seen you
I can never look away

So I trust in love
You have given me peace of mind

--

Edward and Bella in their meadow, before Breaking Dawn, please review.

The song is 'Alive' by P.O.D.