This is set anytime after Cops & Robbers but before 47 Seconds, so possible spoilers for all of that.
Disclaimer: I own nothing ect. ect.
He was dead. But he couldn't be, she refused to believe it. He was lying bloody and broken on the floor of the bank, blue eyes staring blankly at the ceiling. A sob was ripped from her chest, she couldn't breathe. He was dead. All she could see was him, her vision went black and fuzzy around the edges and her blood was pounding in her ears. She could feel the grief and despair closing in around her, threatening to devour her whole. She couldn't stop it, she couldn't save him, why wasn't she able to save him? His blood was on her hands. Oh god, his blood was on her hands. Oh god, oh god, oh god...
She woke with a gasp, tears streaming unnoticed down her face. Castle's dead. Oh god, Castle's dead. No, he's alive. He's at the loft with his mother and daughter, gloriously alive and breathing. Wasn't he?
Still half in the dream, she fumbled for her phone and pressed the button to call him. Her heart was in her throat, anxiety rising the longer the phone rang.
'Hey Beckett, is this a booty or a body call?' his voice was rough with sleep over the phone.
She released a relieved sob before having the presence of mind to hang up the phone. She tossed it somewhere in the general vicinity of the bathroom before curling in a tight ball and finally letting the dream overwhelm her.
It was too real, too vivid. For five awful minutes she believed he was dead and it was almost worse than when she found out her mother was dead. Almost. But she knew now, if she ever lost him it would finish her. There would be no coming back from his death.
There was a sudden pounding on her apartment door accompanied with her name being franticly yelled. She couldn't find it in her to move, to even recognize the voice. So she waited. She figured they would either leave or break down the door. There was a rattle of a key in a lock, running foot steps before Castle was in front of her.
'God Kate. What's wrong?' He edged closer to the bed, 'Kate? Sweetheart, I need you to talk to me, even if it is just to kick me out.'
She reached out and grabbed his wrist, pulling him down on top of her before deftly flipping them over so she was draped over her chest. His real, solid, very much in one piece chest.
'Kate?'
'Just shut up please. We can talk about all of this later but right now what I need you to do is shut up and hold me.' She rested her ear over his heart, listening to the reassuring thump thump.
After another moments hesitation she felt his arms encircle her body, pulling her impossibly closer. He buried his face in her hair, murmuring soothing noises. It was only then that she realised she was crying but it was ok because he was here and he was alive.