Chapter One
Daniel McFadden stepped off the school bus glad to have his first day of high school behind him, yet feeling oddly satisfied with himself. He knew though, his day was far from over. There were chores to tend to and his algebra teacher had decided to start the year off by giving out homework. Daniel hated math almost as much as he hated afternoon chores. He also had a bit of a bomb to drop on Adam and Brian and had no idea how they were going to react.
Since Crane had left for college a couple of weeks back, he had found himself doing some soul searching. He usually talked everything over with his closest brother at night in their room. Now, they only had a few minutes every few days on a long distance phone call. Daniel was a bit too complicated to sort out his feelings with Crane while being timed. Long distance calls from UC Davis were short and sweet. It was necessary due to the added expense to the phone bill. The Circle Bar Seven ranch wasn't exactly operating in the black, so three phone calls a week lasting exactly seven minutes a call, with six brothers trying to speak to Crane on each call, afforded Daniel about three minutes a week to talk with his closest brother. It was mostly Hi how are you; I'm fine. Okay I'll stay out of trouble if you promise to take care of yourself. I love you, good bye. Not exactly in depth conversations.
So, Daniel had conceded that it was time to man up; time to find his own way in life. Today was the first day in that new life. He was finally a high school student. He was the only person at his school with the last name of McFadden. He no longer rode on the same bus with Evan and Ford. For the first time, the middle brother of the family had no brothers, younger or older, tagging along or lurking down the next hallway at his school. The thought had made him sick to his stomach at first. He and his brothers were so very close; inseparable would be a better word to describe them, but now that the first day was over with, Daniel felt oddly independent.
He had made some pretty big decisions today and he knew it was going to catch big brothers Adam and Brian off guard. He could only hope they would be supportive. He wasn't too worried about Brian, but Adam... that was another story. Then there was Crane. He was supposed to call tonight. He wasn't sure how he would take the news either. Overprotective was an understatement when describing how Crane was towards Daniel. He worried more about that kid than Adam and Brian put together. He wasn't going to be too thrilled with Daniel's new life choices, the boy was certain of that.
"Hey Bri." Daniel said, walking into the barn where Brian was working on their broken down tractor.
"Hey Dan'l. How was the first day?" Brian asked, looking over his shoulder, studying the kid carefully. No bruises or signs of a bloody nose. Clothes relatively clean and not torn. Brian thought to himself as he quickly took stock of Daniel. With five younger brothers, he had seen it all. He knew first days could be rough; especially when it's the first day in a new school and especially when your last name is McFadden. Trouble always managed to find he and his brothers. Too, he knew that it didn't take much these days to set off a high strung Daniel.
"It was pretty good, I guess. The girls aren't looking that great. Their zits got worse over the summer." Daniel said with a silly giggle. Of all his brothers, he knew Brian appreciated chatting about the fairer sex.
"Don't worry. Those zits will clear up soon enough. Give 'em another six months and those ugly ducklings will turn into swans." Brian said with a knowing laugh.
"Promise?" Daniel asked with a grin.
"I promise. So, did they put auto mechanics on your schedule?" Brian asked hopefully. He had been working with the kid and noted that he showed a lot of promise in regards to mechanics... that is when Brian could coax him to put down that guitar long enough to turn a wrench or two.
Brian had told Adam he thought Daniel was a natural born mechanic and should be encouraged to pursue it. Brian was over handling the lionshare of the work when it came to repairing broken down farm equipment or vehicles. He had taken Daniel under his wing in the last couple of years and showed the kid everything he knew. He marvelled at how quickly Daniel picked everything up. He took to mechanics like a duck to water, which was a relief to Brian. It gave him a spark of hope that he would one day be allowed to spend more time ranching and less time fixing things.
"Well, they didn't at first. It's hard for a Freshman to get into a Vo-Tech class. They're mostly filled up with Juniors and Seniors." Daniel began to explain.
"I don't quite follow you kid. Do you mean you did or didn't get auto shop?" Brian asked, dropping the wrench he was holding and scratching his head.
"I did, but I had to change a few things around." Daniel answered, looking a little guilty.
"Change things? Like, what things?" Brian continued his line of questioning, feeling exasperated. He hated it when his brothers didn't answer direct questions with direct answers and he knew that Daniel was having fun with him. He was being coy with his older brother.
"Oh, no big deal. I just wanna wait and tell you and Adam at the same time, so I don't have to repeat myself. You needin' some help with the tractor?" Daniel asked cheerfully as he dropped his book bag and picked up the wrench Brian had thrown down.
"Yeah, take off the carbuerator for me, would ya? I need to flush it out." Brian answered. He was done with playing twenty questions. The kid got auto shop and that was good enough. He'd find out the rest with Adam. There wasn't any time to fret over it. Too much work needed to be done. Crane's absence was being felt by everyone, not just Daniel. With Adam spending so much time on the books and now the younger ones being back in school, Brian was overloaded and feeling spread way too thin. He didn't have any free time and it was starting to get the better of him.
"I can flush out the carbuerator and put it back on for you Bri, if you'll get Evan to muck out the stables for me." Daniel asked hopefully.
Brian knew Daniel wasn't fond of ranch work. He didn't understand why, but he knew he didn't. But the kid had always worked hard and didn't complain much. Ranching was just a way of life. They'd all been brought up that way and really didn't know anything else. But Brian figured Daniel would likely be the first one to permanently leave the ranch. He hated the thought of it because the kid was good at just about everything. He would certainly be missed.
Evan and Ford seemed to like ranch life too. But Daniel, Brian noticed, always seemed to have a far off look in his eye. Almost like he was staring at a horizon that no one else around him could see. Brian had pointed it out to Adam a time or two, but Adam acted as though he couldn't see it; Brian knew differently though. He wasn't blind. Adam was just afraid of the thought. He had raised these boys and they had always stuck together. The thought of one of them leaving the nest for good killed him.
"Oh, negotiating your chores with me now, huh?" Brian said with a scoff and a shake of his head. This was one smart kid.
"Well... I mean, you look like you're tired of fooling with it is all... and I don't mind working on the tractor, but I don't have time to fix it and get my chores done. I have homework to do too and I don't have Crane here to help me with it.
"Oh let me guess... Algebra." Brian said with a laugh. "You must have old man Kramer."
"Yep and I already can't stand him. There's no way I'll pass Algebra without Crane."
Crane was always being called on by the younger ones to help with Mathematics. Though Daniel wasn't a great student, he could hold his own in history and science. English was a challenge for him at times... the grammar side of it, anyway, but Adam was always a big help with that. Literature seemed to come easy enough for Daniel. Brian supposed that was where the songwriting skills came in to play. When it came to writing essays or poetry, Daniel was pretty self sufficient. But then there was math. Daniel would likely have never made it to high school if Crane had not been around. Brian knew this was going to be a challenging year for the kid.
"You can pass any course if you set your mind to it Dan'l. Don't sell yourself short." Brian replied.
"Oh yeah? Who's gonna help me. You?" Daniel asked sarcastically.
"Hey, watch that smart mouth. I got my diploma, didn't I? I did it while rearing a bunch of snot nosed little brats too, as I remember." Brian said, swatting Daniel on his backside as he walked past him.
"Well, Kramer's already said to me that he hopes I am a good student like Crane and not like my brother Brian." Daniel explained, then continued, "Hey, where are you going?" Daniel asked.
"To find Evan and tell him he needs to muck out these darned stables. That was our deal, wasn't it?" Brian asked without even bothering to turn around as he continued to walk towards the house. He wasn't about to let Daniel see that the comment made by Mr. Kramer had gotten his goat. He hated that old bastard.
Daniel grinned as he watched his brother go. Brian is the coolest! He thought to himself. With Crane out of the picture, Daniel had found himself bonding with Brian more than ever. Brian understood him a whole lot better than Adam. Maybe he could survive life without Crane for a while after all, Daniel thought to himself.
Dinnertime was as lively as ever in the McFadden household. Everybody was talking at once. Evan was excited about his first day of his last year in junior high. He was also happy that Daniel wasn't on campus with him anymore, calling him little brother in front of his friends. Evan had a complex about that. With he and Daniel only being a year apart, he didn't much feel like Daniel had the right to view him as a 'little brother'. He spent a fair amount of time griping about it too.
Ford was not happy with the teacher he got and had already begun complaining. Guthrie, on the other hand was happy with his. Finally, he had a young pretty teacher. Up to this point in his young life, he had only been subjected to more matronly teachers. He had Miss Reynolds who was only twenty five and very attractive.
"Adam, wait til you meet her. I think you should marry her." Guthrie had declared.
The others had all laughed. Guthrie was always scouting for Adam a wife. Adam figured Guthrie was noticing that all his friends had mom's and dad's and he likely longed for that himself. He was, after all, the only brother to not remember their parents at all. He wouldn't feel as the others might, that a wife for Adam would be like replacing their mother.
"Just slow down a little Guthrie. I don't have time to court your teacher." Adam said.
"Well, I'd feel better about you courting Guthrie's teacher instead of mine." Ford said laughing.
"Don't worry, Ford. Mr. Rutherford isn't my type, anyways." Adam said dryly.
"What. Too short? Or maybe you don't like guys who are prematurely bald." Brian said, elbowing Evan in the ribs. The whole table erupted into laughter.
"Danny, you haven't said too much about your day. How's high school?" Adam asked, trying to ignore all the laughter at his expense.
"Fine. It's better than junior high." Daniel said with a shrug.
"Oh, that's right. Dan'l has some big news for us, Adam. Can we hear about it now?" Brian asked curiously.
"I'm afraid to ask, but what's the big news?" Adam asked, dropping his fork and staring at Daniel.
"No big deal. I just dropped band so I could take auto shop." Daniel said matter of factly. "Would you pass the peas Ford?" He asked as if there was nothing big about his announcement.
"You did what?" Adam asked in astonishment.
"Yes!" Evan stated excitedly.
"What's it to you?" Brian asked, turning to stare at Evan.
"Oh come on. I'll be in high school with him next year. Do you know how embarrassing it would be to explain to the other guys on the football team that my brother is a band geek!" Evan exclaimed.
"You, shut up. That has nothing to do with why I quit." Daniel yelled.
"Hush up Evan. I want to hear this." Adam said, throwing down his napkin.
"What?" Daniel asked innocently. He was staring at his eldest brother, trying not to show any fear. "There was one opening in auto shop and I took it. I can't fit both into my schedule." He went on to explain.
"Well, I for one think it's great. Good job Dan'l. I think you made a good decision." Brian offered.
"Yeah. It made more sense to me. But, even though I got in auto shop, I still have to take either art or a P.E. class. So, they put me in P.E. and that's when I decided to go out for the football team." Daniel explained nonchalantly.
"You did what?" Adam asked, clearly in shock.
"Oh, right. You're gonna get killed dork!" Evan said laughing as he knawed on a pork chop.
"Shut up idiot. I'm just as tough as you! If you can play football, so can I." Daniel yelled.
"Alright, alright. You two pipe down. Evan, I'm trying to hear Daniel out, so please keep your comments to yourself.
"Look, Danny. That's a big change that's gonna affect all of us." Adam began.
"Why?" Daniel asked defensively.
"Don't get all hysterical on me, just listen, Danny. I had it all worked out with Drew's dad. He was gonna bring you home after band practice in the evenings. I don't have time to pick you up from after school football practice." Adam explained.
"I got that handled, Adam. I'm gonna catch a ride with Mike Seymour in the evenings." Daniel explained.
"Who?" Adam asked.
"He's a junior and has his own car. He's gonna be starting QB on senior varsity this year. He said he can drop me off at the crossroads in the evenings." Daniel said matter of factly.
"The crossroads? Oh, so you're gonna hike a mile plus down the county road every evening, just before dusk after ball practice? You'll be worn out Danny... not to mention it's not safe."
"Adam I'm not a kid. I can take care of myself." Daniel objected.
"I know that, but Daniel... you don't get it. You've never played football. I'm sure you'd be good at it, but that's too much to ask of yourself when you got chores and homework to do in the evenings. You'll wear yourself out. I'm sorry, but no. If you want out of band, fine. But you're taking regular P.E. and that's it. No football."
"But Adam..." Daniel began but Adam cut off his words.
"No buts Danny. The matter's closed." Adam stated emphatically.
"I hate you! You can't tell me what to do. You're not my father!" Daniel yelled, jumping up from the table so fast his chair turned over. Without even bothering to right it, Daniel ran out of the room and stormed up the stairs.
And there it was again.
How many times had Adam heard those words out of a ticked off younger sibling? He reckoned Crane and Guthrie were the only ones to have never uttered those words to him in anger... but there was still plenty of time for him to hear it from them in the future.
"He'd have gotten killed out there anyway. He's not big enough to play." Evan said.
"You play and you're no bigger than he is." Brian replied, shaking his fork at Evan.
"Yeah, but I've been playing since pee wee. He doesn't know what he's doing. They'll chew him up and spit him out." Evan continued.
"You just pipe down and eat your supper. I don't want to hear anymore comments from you on the subject." Adam admonished Evan sternly.
"Adam, I think you and me need to talk about this later." Brian said, clearing his throat. Adam was out of line. He had shut Daniel down without hearing him out. Brian knew Adam had a lot on his plate and it often caused him to react before he thought things through. He never handled change too well.
"Look, all I want is to eat in peace and get everybody's paperwork signed and get them started on their homework. Crane will be calling tonight and I want to be able to talk with him without a lot of distractions." Adam said dryly.
"Well, maybe you should have him call you on a phone booth in town, then. Cause distractions, big brother, is all we got around here." Brian said, sounding more than a little disgusted.
Daniel had slammed the door to his room, picked up the picture of his mother and thrown himself down on the bed. He stared at his beautiful mother, his heart, breaking. She would understand his decision. She would appreciate that he had taken his life in his own hands. After all, she had always told him that he could do anything he wanted in life. She had many times told him that all her and Daddy ever wanted for their boys is for them to grow up strong and happy and be whatever they wanted to be. That and learn to be responsible for one's own actions. His parents had been very big on that.
He had expected a bad reaction from Adam, but not a flat out no. He had been more concerned with what Crane was going to think. He expected Crane to be the one to give him grief over it. He would get the lecture about how music scholarships are more plentiful than athletic ones. He would point out that one injury could end any hopes of an athletic scholarship.
Daniel was ready for that lecture though. Unlike Crane, he already just knew college wasn't in his future. While he didn't share his big brothers' passion for being a rancher, he knew he wasn't going to be interested in college either. Football just sounded like fun. It was something he had wanted to try for a while, but couldn't fit it in before now. Besides, leasing a band instrument had been just another financial burden for the family. Now, they could let the trumpet go back and it'd be one less bill to pay. It made logical sense to Daniel. He was more interested in playing guitar anyway. He had learned a lot about reading music by taking band, but it had now served it's purpose. He wasn't going to be a jazz musician and he had learned all he needed to know about reading music to further him in his real dream. Oh, he wanted to be a musician alright. He wanted to write music and play guitar and hopefully make a living at it someday. The auto mechanics made sense, too. He may only be fourteen, but he knew that music was a hard business to make a living at, so having the skills to be a mechanic would be a good career to fall back on if music didn't work out.
Daniel was ready for Crane with all of these great points, but he hadn't expected to have to use them on Adam. He expected Adam to have a problem with after school practices, but he figured to gain his big brothers respect when he told him he had rides worked out, especially since he would be able to get his drivers license next year at fifteen and then he would be able to drive himself and Evan home from practice. Adam had to know that Evan would continue playing and with he Daniel on the same team, it would logically help the family out next year. His mind was made up. He was going to play football, no matter what Adam said.
He was startled out of his thoughts when he heard a knock at the door. Was it Adam already? He had hoped big brother would take more time to cool off before continuing the conversation.
"Come in." He said hesitantly. He was instantly relieved to see Brian walk into his room.
"Hey there, partner. You cooled down yet?" Brian asked, lowering himself to sit on Crane's bed.
"Not really. Brian, what is his deal? He wouldn't even listen to me." Daniel whined.
"I know, I know. Just settle down partner. I'm gonna talk to him." Brian said calmly.
"So you think it's a good idea?" Daniel asked hopefully.
"Yeah, I do. That's why I'm here. I wanted to let you know that you have an ally in this. Just give me some time to work on him. Don't change your schedule back yet." Brian continued.
"Thanks Bri." Daniel said, exhaling in relief.
"But... You made quite a little scene down there. If you want us to treat you like a young man, you need to stop acting like a child, Dan'l. I want you to work on that Algebra so you'll be able to at least say hello to Crane when he calls later." Brian said.
"Yes sir." Daniel said respectfully.
"That's more like it. Next time you act like that at the dinner table, I'm gonna tan your little hyde myself." Brian said, getting up and thumping Daniel on top of the head. You're gonna have to apologize to big brother later, too you know? That was a pretty hurtful thing you said to him."
"I know. I'm sorry." Daniel said, dropping his head as if in shame.
"Good. Well, the other guys are lining up for baths, so I guess you can get yours after we talk to Crane. Get on that homework now and I mean it. No goofing around with that guitar until homework's done." Brian said turning to leave.
"Oh yeah, I didn't even get to tell you the rest of my news!" Daniel blurted out excitedly.
Brian stopped dead in his tracks. Oh great, there's more? He thought to himself. How much more is this kid gonna put me through tonight? "What other news, Dan'l. You gonna tell me you joined the army too?" Brian said, turning to look at Daniel again, crossing his arms as he held his breath.
"Nah. I figured I'd wait a couple years to do that." Daniel said giggling.
"Daniel, what else? I've got three more little brothers to deal with on top of talking to Adam for you, so spit it out, please!" Brian said in disgust.
"Well, I met this guy Jeff in English class. He's really cool. He's a sophomore." Daniel began, before Brian cut him off.
"Dan'l, cut to the meat of it, please."
"Okay, okay." Daniel replied, before continuing, "He plays bass guitar and I told him that I play and write and sing. So he was saying he thinks we should get together on weekends and practice, maybe in his garage or something. He's got an older brother that plays drums and has amplifiers and stuff and he has a friend that plays the fiddle and we were thinking maybe we could start a band. They like country western music too and I'd love to front a band. That'd be cool, huh? Maybe I could even write us some original music-"
"Now hold on partner. That's a lot to put on your plate at fourteen. Let's take one step at a time. I appreciate your enthusiasm, but lets not get ahead of ourselves, huh? Your schooling comes first and we still gotta get Adam on board with this football stuff, okay?" Brian exclaimed.
"Okay." Daniel agreed. But Brian couldn't help but notice that far off look in Daniel's eyes again. Yep, that same look he'd seen before. This kid had ambition. He wasn't gonna be a rancher all of his life, Brian was fairly certain. He cringed at the thought of bringing Adam around to that realization.
"Like I said, homework... now." Brian reiterated as he again turned to leave. "That is, if you don't have anything else to share... I mean, I hope that's everything for today. You didn't happen to find the woman of your dreams in History class and make plans to elope tomorrow, or anything?" Brian said over his shoulder as he reached for the door knob.
"Nope, that's it for today." Daniel said, as he reached for his book bag and pulled out the dreaded Algebra book. "I figure I've got the rest of the week to find my wife." He added with a laugh.
"Good." Brian said opening the door with a shake of his head.
Adam sat on the front porch sipping on a beer. He was tired and anxious to hear Crane's voice. He missed the boy terribly. He hadn't realized how much he had leaned on the youngster in recent years. Crane usually saw things the same way Adam did.
This situation with Danny was no different. Adam felt strongly that music served him a better purpose than sports. True enough, Daniel had been great at playing soccer and really seemed to enjoy it, but when he reached junior high school, he had opted to go the route of band rather than sports. Adam had been surprised at the time, but Daniel had excelled in it and Adam began quickly to see the benefits of it.
Like college, for instance. Crane had researched non academic scholarships and had pointed out to Adam that music scholarships tended to pay more than athletic ones. College was a big concern. Even though Adam and Brian had not had the chance to go, it had been in their parents' plans originally. After their deaths, Adam and Brian had decided that they would do their best to give each little brother a shot at college. Crane had done well academically, whereas Daniel was struggling. Adam had hoped that music would not only keep the boy interested in school, but also help him earn a college scholarhsip down the road.
Lost in his thoughts, Adam barely heard the screen door close as Brian walked out onto the porch.
"Mind if I join ya?" Brian asked as he sat down on the steps next to Adam. "Brought you another beer." He said as he offered the can over to his eldest brother.
"Thanks. Don't mind if I do." Adam replied as he watched Brian pop the top off of his own can.
Brian took a swig then said, "You're wound up a little too tight over this football thing, don't ya think?" Brian asked, hoping Adam had cooled off a little.
"Brian, he just caught me off guard. He's been walking around here like a mummy for two weeks and now all of a sudden he comes bounding in with all this new stuff. The kid should come with some kind of warning label." Adam complained.
Brian chuckled and agreed. "I think they should all come with a warning label."
"Yeah, well they don't. Did you see any of this coming?" Adam asked.
"Not really. I've been encouraging him to take auto shop, but I haven't said anything about football. I kinda like the idea though." Brian admitted.
"Why is that?" Adam asked, sounding slightly annoyed.
"Well, the kid's been so volatile and... the way he and Evan go at it, it's kinda scared me a few times. I figure it'd do the boy good to get some of that aggression out on the field. Maybe he'll be too worn out to go ten rounds with any of us in the evenings." Brian explained.
"You may be right. I don't know Bri. It's just that with Crane gone, I don't want Danny to lose direction. I'm afraid he's turning his back on music because Crane isn't here to share it with him." Adam admitted somberly.
"Well... if that's your biggest worry, then fear no more. Dan'l ain't giving up his music, I promise you that." Brian replied with confidence.
"Is there something else you need to share with the class?" Adam asked inquisitively.
"Nope. Not right now. Just trust me on the music thing, huh? You'll see for yourself soon enough. Look, I think we'd better get back into the assylum there. The inmates may take over if we leave 'em unattended for too long." Brian said with a laugh.
"Yeah, it's about time for Crane to call anyways." Adam relented, getting up from the step and following Brian inside. Thank God I have Brian, Adam thought to himself as he walked inside.