"I remember you was conflicted
Misuse of your influence
Sometimes I did the same
Abusing my power, full of resentment
Resentment that turned into a deep depression"

The last thing I remember was falling into a black void, a void full of my sins, sins that had cost the life of innocent people; my hands were full of their blood.

The black void became a huge tunnel with a light at the end, a light that was offering me peace, forgiveness, but I couldn't reach it every time I got close a huge wave strike me down an unbearable pain took down my body, my chest was exploding the bullet hole that was on my stomach felt like acid it was like a slowly and it felt like dying all over again but this time with a more painful torture.

My eyes couldn't open, I didn't want them to open.

To face the reality I put myself into I knew it would destroy was left of me

Why I'm still alive?.

6 minutes were enough to get into a thin line, one mistake and it's over, 6 minutes make my realize how wrong I was about everything.

I couldn't bare it anymore, the lies, the second life, it was destroying me it was like this little poison in my brain and I had enough of it.

-"Hey Mikey, are you going to stay in the house or you are planning to get back to DC"- Briggs enter the kitchen looking exhausted after his stakeout last night but a least he wasn't as annoyed as usual -"There's nothing left for me in DC or with my family for them, I'm death so I you don't mind, I would like to stay here"- his sights -"After all I'm officially the unnamed agent who died in an L.A hospital"-

-"Mike for all I care you are on your vacations right now your free to do whatever you want, but man if you want to help any of us with a case you're more than welcome after all and extra hand it always welcome" One part of him wanted to go back to field specially with to help him deal with a guy like Ari but he didn't feel ready yet maybe if things went bad with the Sarkissians he probably intervene after he owe Briggs that, after all the times he saved him it was time to pay him back but he needed to help himself first, he has to find his way with this new chance he has.

-"I think about it Paul but right now I need to rest but good luck with Ari anyways"- He faked another smile it was too easy but him but he didn't expect the response Briggs gave him, he look at him disappointed, he knew that Mike was craving an easy way out and it was no lie he wasn't functional with the pills maybe there was a way out but he was having hard time finding it.

Whenever I start to think about drugs I remember when my 17 everything was easy back then more than easy it was simple.

In high school, I was the typical role model: No drugs, alcohol, smoking or any of the other things my classmates used to do. Back in 95' everybody was smoking weed and drinking until they blackout but I was focusing on his grades (on getting out of here as soon as possible) maybe there were times I saw some of them smoke behind the bleachers, I felt disgusted at them because they were weak hiding behind drugs to cover up their insecurities. 10 years and I'm feeling like a huge hypocrite.

The 17 old Mike Warren wasn't disgusted the reality was he was afraid of the after effects.

The 27 old Mike was becoming a junkie who can walk without taking pain-killers how disappointed his old-self be... I guess I never know is not like I really care anymore.

Found myself screaming in the hotel room
I didn't want to self-destruct
The evils of Lucy was all around me
So I went home running for answers