I have no idea how I came up with this, it just sort of happened. Special thanks to Midna3452 for beta reading!
Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia.
It was yet another world conference meeting. France and England were fighting, America was talking about god knows what, and Germany was desperately trying to keep order. Poland, however, was on his phone, not even bothering to hide it after the meeting fell into chaos, as it always did.
Just as he was in the middle of a game of Candy Crush, Poland could feel someone staring at him. He was just about to ask what their problem was until he saw their face.
Staring into his soul were the blue, piercing eyes of Sweden. And he did not look happy.
Poland quickly looked back down at his phone. The expression, "if looks could kill," sprang to mind. He tried to think of something he could have said or done to anger the Swedish man, but his mind came up blank. He tried and failed to concentrate on his game and ignore Sweden's eyes burning holes into his skull.
The meeting dragged on for about fifteen more minutes until Germany gave up and called it to a close, to Poland's immense relief. The Polish man quickly grabbed his things and got up to leave. Just as he was about to walk out the door, however, he ran face first into Sweden's chest.
"I n'd to talk to y'u. M't me outside." he commanded. Automatically, Poland shrunk back a little from the larger man. It took him a minute to understand what he was trying to say.
"Y-you want to talk to me? Why can't we talk here?" Poland asked. Mentally he added, you know, where there are witnesses?
"I d't want m'wife to know." he explained. Poland gulped. There was no way in hell he was going anywhere with Sweden, especially alone.
"I-I have to go the bathroom," he stuttered out as he ran as fast as he could. On his way out, he ran straight into Lithuania, who let out a yelp of surprise. When he saw it was Poland, he relaxed a little.
"Hey Poland, how are-" Poland cut him off by grabbing his wrist and dragging him along, ignoring his friend's protests.
They didn't stop running until they got to the bathroom. Poland let go of Lithuania, and they both spent a minute trying to catch their breath.
"What was that about?" Lithuania looked around. "And what are we doing in here?" asked Lithuania. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Poland run that fast.
"Sweden. He totally wants to kill me," the Polish man explained.
"What are you talking about?" Lithuania asked, even though he wasn't sure he wanted to know.
"He wants to meet me outside. What could he possibly want?" Poland asked, a hint of desperation in his voice. He started to twist a piece of hair around his finger, something he always did when nervous.
"Maybe he just wanted to ask you a question," Lithuania offered.
"Didn't you see the way he was staring me down during the meeting? He looked pissed." Poland shuddered.
"Did you do anything that could set him off?"
"No! At least, I don't think so."
"Then you're probably overreacting. Estonia says he's not so bad once you get to know him," Lithuania offered. "You should probably go talk to him. Besides, it's rude to ignore people."
Before Poland could explain to his dear friend that he was not, in fact, suicidal, he heard Finland's voice right outside the bathroom.
"... Ok, Su-san, I'll meet you in the car." Finland's footsteps slowly faded as he walked away.
"Cover for me," Poland said before hopping in one of the stalls. Lithuania rolled his eyes.
"Poland, this is ridiculous, Sweden's not going to kill you," he whisper-shouted.
Just then, Sweden entered the bathroom and stopped when he saw Lithuania.
"Is Poland in h're?" asked Sweden, glaring down at brunet, making him feel uneasy. Wow, thought Lithuania, he does look scary when up close.
He looked back towards the stall where the blond was hiding. He was torn between being honest and protecting his friend. He knew Poland probably didn't have anything to worry about, but still…
"Um, he just left. S-said he got sick," Lithuania said, hoping he sounded convincing. He was pretty sure Sweden wouldn't try to hurt Poland, but decided to cover for him just in case.
It might've been his imagination, but Lithuania could see the slightest hint of disappointment in Sweden's expression.
"Hm. Tell 'm it's important." said Sweden. Lithuania gave a polite smile.
"Okay." Sweden then turned to leave.
Poland left his hiding place when he was sure Sweden was gone. "Can you believe that? He followed me into the bathroom! That guy is totally creepy," Poland exclaimed, with an exasperated look on his face.
"Alright," Lithuania started to say. "I'll admit that was a little weird, but that doesn't mean he wants to kill you."
Poland still wasn't convinced. He didn't want to be alone tonight, so he came up with an idea.
"You know, you should totally let me stay at your house tonight. It will be fun! We can play games and watch movies, you know, have a sleepover." After all, was there ever a better time to have a sleepover with your best friend than when an angry Swedish man might be trying to kill you?
Lithuania shook his head. "Sorry, I'm going to be really busy tonight preparing my presentation for the next meeting. You should probably work on yours too."
Poland waved his hand dismissively. "That's, like, totally boring, we can do that later. Come on, don't you want to hang out with me?"
"Of course I want to hang out with you, but I really am busy. Maybe some other time." Poland pouted and Lithuania put a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
"You're going to be fine. You don't have anything to be worried about."
Lithuania smiled at Poland and left. The Polish man sighed and, after making sure the coast was clear, did the same.
He was driving home, thinking about all the different scenarios of what Sweden could possibly do and how he could defend himself. What if he tried to break in? Where did he put his old sword? Could he take him in a fight? He did have years of experience, but so did Sweden.
His thoughts were interrupted when he saw a sign in front of the mall.
"Everything 20% off, ends December 1"
Today was December 1. Poland looked back at the sign and sighed. Maybe I could just get a few things...
"I'm sorry, sir, but you have to leave, it's closing time." said a security guard in a tan colored uniform. Poland gave him a dirty look before walking out the front doors.
He couldn't believe how time got away from him, but there was nothing that took his mind off of things quite like shopping. He made his way through the parking lot with his hands full of shopping bags. He may be small and not look that strong, but he had mastered the art of being able to carry more bags than a man twice his size.
As he opened his car door, he accidentally bumped it into the car next to him, and noticed it left a little scratch. He cursed under his breath and was just about to leave before the car's owner came back when he noticed something that made his blood run cold.
It was Sweden's car. And Sweden was coming this way.
Trying to fight the incoming panic attack, Poland unceremoniously dumped all of his bags in the back and threw himself into the driver's seat. He hit the gas and sped out of there faster than Italy when being chased by England.
What was he even doing there? Poland wondered. Was he following him?
Well, if Sweden wasn't going to kill him before, he definitely was going to now.
He toyed with the idea of staying at a hotel, but then realized that he had pretty much out of money. For the first time in his life, he regretted going shopping. Left out of options, he raced to the relative safety of his house.
When he got there, he threw his bags inside, locked all the doors, and prayed that Sweden forgot where he lived.
He spent a few minutes trying to catch his breath. Once he started to calm down a little, his attention turned back to his bags of clothes hastily thrown to the floor, and decided to try a few things on. He was busy admiring himself in the mirror wearing a light green button down shirt and black skinny jeans when a knock on the door almost made him jump out of his skin.
At first, he tried to ignore it hoping that the person would go away, and for awhile, it seemed like they did. Then after a few minutes they started knocking again, even louder this time.
Reluctantly, Poland quietly made his way to the door and looked out the window to see that it was Sweden.
Of course it's him.
Poland winced as Sweden knocked for a third time, even louder and more forceful. If nothing else, Sweden was a very determined man. Unfortunately for Poland, this meant he would probably not go away until he answered the door.
Well, at least he would die looking fabulous.
Slowly, he undid the locks and opened the door. Outside was a very tall, very scary looking Sweden, with his famous death glare. Before he could stop himself, words started flooding from Poland's mouth.
"I'm sorry I scratched your car at the mall. But seriously what were you doing there anyway? Are you following me or something? 'Cause that's totally creepy. I know you came over because you hate me and want to kill me or whatever, just don't get blood on my clothes. I just got them, and they're, like, really expensive."
Sweden stared down at the shorter man in confusion. Is this why he was acting so strange? Why did everyone think that the Swedish man was violent?
"I h've a fav'r to ask y'u," he said.
This stopped the Polish man for a minute. "A favor?"
"'M 'aving a surprise birthday p'rty for m'wife. I th'ght y'u could h'lp me plan it."
Poland stared up at the Swedish man dumbfounded. Did he just say he wanted help with a party? That's why he was chasing him down all day?
"...Um, sure," was all Poland could think to say. Sweden nodded.
"We c'n talk more tomorrow. M'wife gets worried when 'm out too late."
Poland made a weak smile. "Sure, yeah."
Sweden turned back to his car, and just as Poland's tense muscles began to relax, Sweden turned back to him.
"Wait...Did y'u say som'thing about m'car?"
I can see Poland having a reputation for throwing awesome parties, which is why Sweden would ask him for help.
I wrote another oneshot that should be up tonight or tomorrow, which centers around Russia and the Baltics, Lithuania mostly. So, you can check that out if you want.
Thanks for reading :)