"The rift energy is spiking! It's coming now!" shouted Tosh, the PDA in her hand buzzing wildly as it put out an insistent rhythm.
The five members of the team stood around the crack in the universe, watching the corona fizzle and spark through the atmosphere. Blue tinged lightning sparked through the air, grounding itself on the bits of jetsam scattered on the roof.
"Don't fire till I say" ordered Jack, "It might be harmless".
"We're not all as trigger happy as you, Jack" shouted Gwen over the noise of the boiling air. "We can restrain..."
Her words were cut off as the rift shot out a final burst of lighting, sparking through the guns they held. They all dropped their guns as a figure stepped through the rift.
"I made it" the girl said, "I've found Torchw..." her words cut off as she fell to the ground, her blue hair obscuring her face.
"Ooh look, the rift's started delivering," quipped Owen. "I'll have a bottle of coke as well please," he shouted to the now empty air.
While he joked, Gwen had put her jacket under the new arrival's head. "She's young", she said, "I wonder how she got into the rift. Let's get her back to base and make her comfortable."
"She can be comfortable in a cell. I don't trust anything that comes out of that rift, female or not, young or not", said Jack, his voice taking on a throaty tone as he looked at the girl.
"You're not usually that picky", quipped Ianto.
Sometime later, they stood around the cell containing the girl. As they watched, her eyelids flicked up, revealing her grey eyes. She looked around her, taking in the cleanest underground cell this side of Torchwood One, before finally raising herself to her knees. She looked up into Jack's face, her eyes settling on him as she climbed to her feet.
She took a shaking breath, and steadied herself with a hand against the wall. Her lips trembled and she took a second, stronger breath, and then released her words in a rush. "Okay, I'm in prison. That's fine. You don't trust me. I can fix that."
I'm from a parallel universe, one of millions. I come from a universe in which Torchwood is dedicated to wiping out other universes. They sent me here with a device in my brain. They told me it was to give me information on you, in the form of memories, so that I could get close to you, and then I could set up a treaty and assistance agreement."
It's a lie though. I got hold of their version of Toshiko's PDA, and the device is an auto-destruct annihilation mechanism. They've sent me here to destroy the 'Prime' version of Torchwood, in an attempt your place. So I need your help to get it out of me."
"My god, that's horrible. We'll try and help you," said Gwen.
"Wait", interrupted Jack. "How do we know we can trust you? We're seen all sorts of alien beings impersonating people. What's your name?"
"Word of warning", said Owen, "don't say Mork".
"I'm called Penelope Sumbeam. Don't laugh."
"Hadn't dreamt of it love, wouldn't even consider laugh, laugh, haugh, ha ha haha hahahahahahahahaha!" Owen collapsed on the floor, gasping for air as his muscular spasms forced his lungs into overdrive. Toshiko was instantly at his side, pushing a the inch long needle of a syringe into his stomach.
"Sorry about that", she said. "He was attacked last week by a gigglonian. It was fun at first, but it's beginning to get tiresome listening to him go into fits at anything even mildly amusing. Sorry, not that your name is funny. Not at all."
"Anyway, you've got a real name at least", said Jack. "Why don't you prove you know so much about us? Tell us something only we'd know."
"Well, okay. Gwen wants to name her first child Anwen. Toshiko really fancies Owen."
"We know that", broke in Owen. "Something we don't know."
"Owen fancies Toshiko," Penelope said, watching the blush bloom on Tosh's face. "And Tosh spent the entire six months she was locked up thinking of Edward."
She took a deep breath before continuing. "Jack has Rose to thank for his particular condition, and Ianto has Lisa to thank for his job. In fact, that's one of the things I can do to gain your trust."
Penelope took a step forward, and rapped 'shave and a haircut' on the front of the cell.
"Hub command, Dorothy in Wonderland", she said in a loud clear voice.
The hub responded with a voice none of the team had ever heard. It was a rich round voice, a mellow version of the usual shrieking tone when something had gone hideously wrong. "Waiting for command."
"Begin command Cyber Beta Four, sub-basement 7A", said Penelope, who nodded appreciatively when she heard the hum of secondary generators switch on.
"Lisa!" Ianto ejaculated, sprinting out of the corridor.
"Ianto, wait!" shouted Jack, who followed him, with a hurried "Wait there!" sent over his should.
It was several hours later, and the explanations were finished. Lisa had been heavily retconned to get her past the emotional trauma of being turned cyber, and had been released back to her home. Penelope had been released from the cells, and was enjoying a cup of Ianto's coffee.
"So", said Jack, "this device in your head. Do you know how to remove it?"
"No", replied Penelope. "The team had me unconscious all the way through the procedure, so I don't know what they did."
"Any ideas Owen?" asked Jack.
"Well, it depends where in her head it is. If it's near the surface, simple surgery should suffice. If it's deeper in, we might need to use some of the alien devices. We'll need to scan her first."
"I'll get the scanner up and running then", said Toshiko. "It should be able to pinpoint the precise position of the device. You're going to need to be unconscious for the procedure, but we can let you walk down to the scanner yourself."
"I'm afraid you'll need strapped down", said Jack.
"But it's not that bad", put in Ianto.
Penelope led the way down to the scanner, ducking to avoid the team's pet pterodactyl. "You know, if you fire a beam of huon energy of frequency 3000 Hz at the rift, you'll be able to send that back to where it came from."
Toshiko tapped frantically on her PDA. "My god, she's right. That produces a rift spike identical to the one that brought it here."
"Maybe we should leave that device in your head", said Jack, "seems like it could be useful". He smiled wolfishly at Ianto.
"No, we can't leave it in there", said Owen in an unusually kind voice. "It could be doing all sorts of damage".
The team finally reached the scanning room, and Penelope lay down on the table. Ianto began to strap her down, sealing the velcroed foam at wrists, ankles and neck.
"Don't be gentle", said Penelope, a lilt in her voice. "I like it tight."
Ianto blushed from the top of his head to the base of his feet, but tightened the velcro further.
"Right", said Jack. "You definitely can't move?"
Penelope stretched her lithe body against her bonds, and shook her head.
"Good", said Jack, "because I have a little confession to make. This isn't the prime universe."
Penelope's eyes stared as Jack's jaw lowered and lowered and lowered. His teeth flowed, forming needle sharp points an inch long, and his tongue became pointed. He swept it across his teeth, leading a trail of slime dripping from his jaw. His fingernails lengthened, becoming claws, and his pupils expanded to fill his entire eye.
Behind him, Tosh, Owen, and Gwen had undergone a similar transformation. Only Ianto remained human.
"Ianto, sssssstrip her", hissed Jack.
"Anything to help", said Ianto cheerfully, producing a pair of scissors. He sliced through her leather miniskirt, and her black knickers. The denim waistcoat and white t-shirt were savaged by the scissors, and her black bra, holding her firm breasts were chopped in half. She gasped as he nicked her under her left breast.
The scraps of clothing were pulled away from her body, as Jack trailed a fingernail down her stomach. He paused just above her navel, and pulled back his finger, before thrusting it downwards.
The nail burst through her skin, sending spikes of pain through her abdomen. Her skin was peeled back from her body, cleaved off in great strips, blood dropping down from Jack's claws.
Penelope screamed as her organs were opened to the atmosphere, living through the pain.
"Tuck in guys", said Jack. "She'll not last forever."
The others dived forward, claws digging through her organs, and Penelope died as her blood and guts spilled onto the metal floor.
"Not joining us Ianto?" asked Gwen, teeth deep in a piece of small intestine.
"No thanks, quite happy with my Battenberg", replied Ianto, arranging his snack on a small plate. "Oh, and I've got some coffee on for afters. Don't forget, don't eat that chip, it could come in handy."