"I approximate the destination to be 5 kilometres away." The Jumper's AI said in that cool, annoying voice. The AI had been developed after Rodney's ascending-beam incident. It was one of the many things he had thought of. Recently, the department had found a way to put it into a Jumper and now they had created this hell-load of nuisance.

"Do I need to put a muzzle on you?" John asked the holographic body of the AI, Wellington.

"I am a computer. A muzzle cannot be put on me or my holographic avatar."

"Here it goes: All the 'logical words and conclusions'. Can't you just mute yourself?"

"I can. However, I cannot see any reason to mute myself."

"I can: You're annoying. Rodney, can we shut him off altogether?"

"Yes, but that would break the Jumper to the point of FUBAR and since the 'gate is in orbit around the planet, we wouldn't really want to do that." Rodney said.

"I am detecting..." Wellington started.

"Wait, and let the Jumper do it for us."

"I have gone through the sub-database and I have discovered that the ship wasn't called a Jumper originally. It was called a Hontaporalarkus."

"The Ancients were terrible at naming things." Ronon observed. "And I think taking him out would be worth the risk of never being able to go home again."

"Could you not?" Rodney said.

"Anyway, the Jumper..."

"Hontaporalarkus."

"SHUT UP!" SGA-1 chorused together.

"The Jumper has given us what Wellington here detected earlier." The holographic screen was indeed showing them a sort of... Temple?"

"What is that?" Teyla asked.

"Well, judging by it's architecture: Not built by the Ancients. Most possibly a temple to the 'ancestors' that was built by the previous inhabitants of this valley." Rodney said.

"OK. Let's go check it out. Wellington will have to come so he doesn't keep screaming in my ear." John said.

Rodney took the HAC-bot for Wellington and John landed the Jumper in a clearing next to the temple. The rear hatch opened and HAC-bot-1 deployed itself to move out of the Jumper and with SGA-1.

Temple

Rodney studied the writing on the walls and pillars. Ronon kept watch. Teyla and John were patrolling the area to see if there were any more of these temples. And, of course, Wellington was with Rodney.

"Middle English." Rodney muttered.

"What?" Ronon asked.

"Nothing, just thinking out loud."

"What's 'middle English'?"

"It's an old dialect in our language. Comes from several hundred years ago. Some still use it but it's a dead language." he explained

"Right... You people are strange."

"In many ways, yes." Rodney agreed.

"What does the writing say?"

"From my experience and knowledge of middle English and the hard-working understanding of this terrible handwriting, I'd say it means: 'The middle stone holds the key. Only those with the gift may unlock it's power. Then when it is awoken, a light shall shineth forth and engulf those who deserve paradise. They will eventually die, be honoured and rise to Ascension'."
"That's it?"

"Well, it's the most important part. Other parts are just strange words which mean nothing and even if they did, I wouldn't bother to read them."

"So... What does the explanation of what this is mean?"

"Well I don't know, but..." Rodney walked next to a clear stone on the temple. Something sprung out, it looked like a hand, and grabbed Rodney's head. It shone out rays of light then retracted into a green device on the wall. Rodney collapsed when he was released.

"Rodney!" Ronon caught him before he settled on the floor. Ronon touched his earwig.

"Ronon to Sheppard."

"Sheppard to Ronon. What happened?"

"Something just sprung out of the wall and engulfed Rodney's head. We need to get back to Atlantis."

"Acknowledged. Sheppard out."

On Atlantis

Rodney woke up wearily. He saw 5 figures sitting on the beds opposite him. As his eyesight grew clearer he could see that it was Teyla, John, Ronon, Elizabeth and Jennifer talking.

"His neural activity is bulging to a point that I wasn't even aware could be achieved." Jennifer said.

"And that means?" Ronon, asked, sounding worried... Which was surprising.

"I don't know. But it's worrying."

"What's worrying?" Rodney asked, tired as hell.

"Rodney. You're awake." Jennifer said.

"Yeah. Appears so. What happened?"

"Something sprung out of the wall and grabbed your head. You became unconscious after it released you." Ronon said.

"What exactly was that?" John asked.

"I don't know. Anyway. How are you feeling, Rodney?"

"Oh, just sha'an."

There was a pause in speech and, joke quote, time.

"Sha'an? That's Ancient for 'fine'." Elizabeth explained.

"He's speaking Ancient?" John asked.

"That must be due to the neural activity." Jennifer said.

Uh oh. Something is wrong. If you've watched the all of SG-1 to at least the end of season 7 then you'll know what's happened. I'll leave you to work it out :).