A/N: First Fanfic, woooo! Didn't turn out exactly the way I planned. Oh wait, I didn't plan it. Way to go me, making up plots as I go ._. Sorry guys, no pornz (YET), but light slash and fluff so thick you could cut it with a knife. Italics are Toki and Skwisgaar speaking in their respective languages. Reviews would be nice, and constructive criticism is welcome. Enjoy :D
CRACK
The whip struck his back again and again. Toki could feel the blood running down the length of his body. Yet he was silent. He had to be, or his father would just hurt him more. His fathers words were lost on him, though a few rang through his head.
"Devil...Worthless...Hell-child!"
"Father, I.."
The whip cracked once more, and the rattling of chains could be heard from Toki's position on the pink-tinged snow.
Toki's scream echoed throughout the cold stone walls that made up Mordhaus, ending in a strangled sob. Toki got out of bed slowly, gasping, struggling to breathe through the sobs that wracked his body.
"Oh fucks."
Toki dashed into his bathroom and retched into the sink, the contents of his stomach swirling down the drain in a sickly brown mass. He stared at his reflection in the mirror, taking in the details of his face, failing to notice the tall silhouette in the doorway. His Hair hung limp and stringy, stuck to his forehead from dry sweat. Pale blue eyes, sunken into his face, tears streaking down his cheeks into two small pools on the counter.
He took his small shaving mirror off the counter and held it behind him. He gazed into the mirrors at the decades old latticework of scars on his back. The memories of his dream came flooding back to him. his stomach flipped, and his knees buckled. Toki cringed, expecting to feel cold stone under his bare legs, but instead hit something warm, soft. Skin, he realized. Cloth? But wha-
Skwisgaar's deep, soft voice stopped his thoughts cold. "Toki, what's wrong?"
"You'll just make fun of me and call me a fucking dildo.
Skwisgaar chose to ignore this comment. " Was it a bad dream?"
Toki was hesitant to answer, but he did anyway. "Yes." Toki cringed almost visibly, waiting for the Swede to belittle him. But it never happened.
Skwisgaar shifted his position so he was kneeling behind Toki. He slowly, almost tentatively, started rubbing Toki's shoulders.
"Would you like to talk about it?"
Toki promptly started crying again, his shoulders shaking. Small whimpers escaped his lips as he tried to find words. Skwisgaar just held him, gently rocking them, whispering words of comfort in his sweet velvet voice. Oh, how Toki loved his voice.
As the Norwegian man began to calm down, he regained his ability to speak. He turned around in the blonde's arms, and looked into his azure eyes. The normally haughty, unforgiving sneer the Swede usually wore was nowhere in sight, instead replaced by a warm half-smile. Toki was stunned by the fact that this sort of expression was directed at him, and by the beauty that graced the blonde's typically cruel features.
"Yes, Toki?"
"Why are you doing this?"
The Swede just smiled, and slowly pressed his lips to the brunette's. The kiss was gentle, slow, and everything Toki had expected. He swooned, heart leaping, and all his sorrows seemed to melt away as Skwisgaar cupped a cheek with one big hand. He trailed his fingers down the side of the Norwegians face as they broke apart. Toki wished so desperately for the Swede to actually care. But it couldn't be true, not with the way he treated the younger man.
" Go ahead. Do it. Make fun of me."
Skwisgaar looked as if he had been punched in the gut. He hung his head.
"I deserved that. I fucking deserved that. I'm so sorry, Toki. I- I..." he trailed off.
" You're... You're serious?" The Swede nodded, keeping his head bowed. Toki put one calloused fingertip gently under Skwisgaar's chin, and lifted his face. He was shocked to see angry tears in the deep blue orbs of Skwisgaar's eyes, threatening to spill. When they finally did, Toki wiped them away with his thumbs carefully.
"You mean you really care? "
"Of course I care."
Skwisgaar stood slowly, and pulled the still shaky Toki to his feet. Skwisgaar took a moment to look at Toki's gorgeous body. They had seen each other naked, of course, all the band members had seen each other naked at times. But Toki was so goddamned sexy, and Skwisgaar was going to admire him. Skwisgaar looked the shorter man over, taking in his features. The broad, muscular chest, tiny nipples on perfectly shaped pecs. Flawless abs that any man would die for, angular hips jutting out from the waistband of black boxers. He lifted his gaze to Toki's face. Why hadn't he noticed how stunningly attractive Toki was? He looked uncomfortable.
"What are you staring at, Skwis?" This snapped the Swede out of his reverie.
"Sorry. You're just so.. So... Beautiful." A slight flush arose on the brunette's tear-stained cheeks.
"You really think so?"
"Pfft! Who wouldn't think so?" He replied with an uncharacteristic grin. He was rewarded with a small smile that made the brunette's Fu Manchu jut out in a humorously adorable way. Skwisgaar was acting very odd, Thought Toki, silently wondering how long this would last. He didn't want to push his luck. However, he didn't want to stay alone.
"Sk-Skwisgaar?"
"Yes?"
"Will you stay with me tonight?" Skwisgaar smiled and nodded, nearly leaving Toki speechless at the Swede's actions.
"Let's go to bed."
"gladly." Toki exited the bathroom, unconsciously giving Skwisgaar a perfect view of the spiderweb of scars on his abused back. Most people would see Toki's scars as a sign of weakness, but Skwisgaar saw them for what they really were. A reminder that Toki had survived, that he was still alive through the abuse and torture of his childhood. He thought they were a sign that Toki's painful childhood was over and done with, and he had come out on top.
Toki was standing near his bed, staring at Deddy Bear forlornly. Skwisgaar could see the tears silently running down the Norwegian's cheeks. The blonde man made his way to his brunette counterpart. He wrapped his wiry arms around Toki's waist, and placed his chin on his shoulder.
"Shhh," he started, then slowly climbed onto Toki's twin bed, pulling the smaller man along with him. Toki turned and kissed the older man chastely, pulling away and smiling though eyes pink and puffy from tears, drinking in the warm expression on the Swede's unbearably handsome face. Toki was already having trouble keeping his eyes open, Skwisgaar realized, wondering how often nightmares plagued Toki's sleep.
"Sleep, my Toki," he instructed. Almost immediately, Toki was asleep, one arm resting on Skwisgaar's chest.
"You are safe with me." With that, Skwisgaar settled down to sleep, happy holding the man he'd desired for so long. As sleep overtook him, Skwisgaar intertwined his fingers with Toki's.
"My Toki..."