Hey guys! So, yes, I know this has been done like six trillion times before, but I've always wanted to try it, so here we go. This is the first of the many song-inspired one-shots, so please let me know what you think! This might be slightly different to my usual writing style considering I haven't written Merlin and Arthur in what seems like forever, so sorry! Anyway, I'll let you get to reading.

Another note - please let me know if you have a better title idea, because the current one is awful. But it's midnight and I'm drowning in revision, so please forgive me.

And the first song on shuffle is -

Song: Never Be Alone

Artist: Shawn Mendes

Characters: Merlin, Hunith, Will, Arthur

Genres: Angst, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort

Words: 3773

I promise that one day I'll be around, I'll keep you safe, I'll keep you sound…

Growing up with unmarried parents would have been hard enough by itself. The fact that Balinor had never been around throughout all of Merlin's childhood was worse, and the cruelty of other youngsters about the village did nothing but add to the confused emotions that he already experienced whist growing up and simultaneously attempting to tame and hide his magic. During the earliest years of his life, Merlin could recall the soft glow of the flames in the fireplace, the reflection lapping at the floor and the warm tones of his mother's voice, slow and steady as she spoke of far-away lands and loving friends who cared no matter what, and a dragon; a world filled with magic as pure as his, and as good and loving as his own heart. The then eager five-year-old lapped up the tales like a cat to milk, and images of a golden future danced through his dreams.

Fast forward a few years, and we discover the lonely silhouette sitting on the crest of the hill, the sun-scorched strands of corn and fraying wheatgrass arching up above his head and shoulders in the warm breeze. The lighter evenings of the summer months granted the young eight-year-old the freedom that his soul desperately sought.

Drawing his knees up to his chest, Merlin wrapped his arms around his legs and rested his chin on top of his skinny knees. The amber of the sun's rays flooded through the trees behind him, scattering dappled light across the back of his thin shirt, red fabric frayed and bunched up around his waist. It wasn't that Hunith didn't care, nor that she didn't try – the poor woman worked all the hours she could but funds were sparse, and fabric was limited.

In front of him the sunset engulfed the skies in swirling waves of pastel; peach, salmon, violet and streaks of midnight blue ghosting the upmost branches of the horizon. Soft clouds were tinged with peach edges, turning the landscape a warm and golden hue. The countryside spilled out in front of him, a patchwork of fields bordered by the small scattering of houses that Merlin knew was Ealdor. He never normally wandered this far, but Hunith was working late and the freedom the rise of the hill offered sounded too good to resist. Plucking a nearby dandelion delicately between two lithe fingers, he brought the fluffy cotton to his freckled nose and stared at the flower in fascination.

'You're supposed to make a wish or something, aren't you?' A confident voice seemed to whisper around him, tinged with laughter. Merlin brought his head from his knees with a start, casting a wide-eyed gaze about his immediate surroundings in search of the speaker, only to be met with no one but the nearby blackbird pecking about the base of the oak tree. He tossed the feathered creature the few crumbs he had in his pockets and watched, a small smile twitching at the corners of his mouth as the bird hopped closer.

'Go on then.' Merlin tilted his head to one side, the breeze ruffling the too-long hair that tickled the nape of his neck. 'Show me how it's done.' He blinked, pursing his lips and squeezing his eyes shut as the faint words of his wish died unspoken but for in his mind as he blew against the dandelion. Tiny white fronds leapt about in the air, then floated towards the horizon like small doves spreading their wings. Merlin reached out one hand, giggling as he felt one brush against the tip of his finger.

Almost as soon as he had been thinking of a wish, they were gone and he was left alone with his thoughts again. He was too bright for his age, really he was, and the cruel jeers and bruises from his peers left him hurt and confused. He didn't know why they all despised him so much, and he couldn't help not having a father around.

Right now, it's pretty crazy and I don't know how to stop or slow it down…

Feeling the stinging heat trickle down his cheeks, he reached up to cuff away the tears, shaking his head in an attempt to forget the raised voices and blows from earlier that day. Instead he focussed on letting the familiar warmth flood through his body, his eyes lighting a molten gold as his magic swept around him, comforting. Picturing an image in his head, he let the energy form the shape of a small golden dragon in the palms of his outstretched hands.

"Merlin?" A young voice called from between the trees, bracken crunching beneath the soles of worn boots. Merlin blinked, the dragon dissipating instantly as he lost his concentration. Will burst from between the trees excitedly, a wide grin plastered to his face as he jumped down next to his younger friend. "Look what I found!" He exclaimed, reaching out cupped hands to reveal a small and slimy brown form. "It's a frog."

Delighted by this new find, Merlin banished all thoughts and memories of a familiar yet unknown voice and focussed on his friend (and the frog). It would be a few more years until he would hear it again, on his twelfth birthday.

"Hey." A gentle hand gripped his shoulder, before releasing him as Will sunk down amongst the wild flowers next to him. "Merlin, c'mon, look at me."

Hey. I know there are some things we need to talk about…

"You promised. You promised you wouldn't leave." Merlin's voice cracked midway through his sentence and he turned away, fixing his sights on the horizon, blue eyes glistening with unshed tears. He traced the fading outline of a bruise across his shin, and shook his head, dark hair waving gently in the wind.

"I'm sorry." Will didn't force him to look away, instead reaching across so that their shoulders brushed. "It's only for a few weeks, Mer, honest. You know how Father wants me to get more involved with the farm now, and this trip is the way I can prove myself to him."

"You don't need to prove yourself to anyone, we already know you're…" Merlin waved his arms wildly at his blond friend, sighing as he jammed his hands under his crossed legs and biting his lower lip in an anxious gesture.

And I can't stay…

Will remained silent, dropping his gaze to the floor, shredding at the remains of a fallen leaf with ragged nails. Merlin didn't say a word either. "They don't say anything when you're around."

"You'll be alright. Just…try and stay out of trouble until I get back, alright?" Merlin shrugged, not looking up. Will sighed, running a hand through his tangled hair in exasperation. "Are you coming back yet, or…?"

"I'm gonna stay up here for a bit longer." Merlin replied in a small voice, digging his nails into his palms in an effort not to cry. Ever since he could remember, Will had been there to keep him grounded and to stop the bullies, to talk a certain elderly man out of forcing Merlin into too many punishments for the tree incident. He'd been there for the good times and through the bad. And though the trip may only be for a season, it seemed like so much longer to the raven-haired boy.

'You never told me. How they treated you, I mean.'

Merlin frowned, recalling the voice from years before. His magic was practically humming as he listened to the voice echoing in his mind.

'I'm sorry. You, of all people, don't deserve that.'

He wrapped his arms around himself and flopped back, staring up at the cloud scattered skies above, tree branches reaching out for the sun's embrace. Will was really leaving. He closed his eyes, and just breathed, flexing his fingers as he listened to the magic of the world.

Just let me hold you for a little longer now…

By the time he arrived in Camelot, Merlin had learnt a lot. More experienced in life, he understood that the negative words and abuse he'd been subjected to as a young child couldn't be allowed to affect him as an adult. Still though, he couldn't bring himself to explain to Arthur why he felt so strongly about the street-fights that occasionally (rarely nowadays) broke out in the streets of Camelot, or why he flinched when the knights got too rough (despite all their good intentions, they were burly men). Some days, normally after there'd been a noble who still believed in the traditions of servants being worth practically nothing, he couldn't help but remember the words that slipped like poison into his mind.

"Merlin!" A bread roll found its way across the room to hit him square in the face and Merlin jolted back to reality, bending down to pick up the bread. "Are you awake now?" Arthur asked him in exasperation from his position lounging like a cat across his bed, staring at the ceiling, his arms folded beneath his head.

"Definitely. All ears. Giving you my full attention." Merlin caught his friend's eye and ducked his head to hide his grin. "Alright clotpole, what is it?"

"There aren't any meetings I'm forced to go to later, are there?"

Merlin considered telling him that there were, before noting the longing look directed towards the sunny countryside visible from the glass of the windowpane. "No," he agreed, sinking down onto the bed next to him, and absent mindedly picking at a loose thread in the covers.

"Prepare the horses, then." Arthur sat up, looking very pleased with himself as he practically leapt off the bed. It never failed to make Merlin laugh how the blond could go from being a confident and well-behaved prince to suddenly turning into hyperactive, cheerful and like a five-year-old – and what made it even more special was that Merlin was one of the only people allowed to see this side of Arthur. He caught himself daydreaming again and physically shook himself, throwing a clean shirt across to Arthur on his way out.

The stables were always bustling, and the stable-hands were used to seeing Merlin there. One boy, Tom, greeted him with a cheerful wave and led out the familiar chestnut mare that Arthur always rode, followed by the dappled grey, still chewing on a mouthful of hay. Patting his usual horse affectionately on the muzzle, Merlin took the reins from Tom with a grateful nod. "Thanks."

"No problem." Tom scratched at the growing stubble across his chin and noted the clear skies allowing the sun's full power to burn down. "Don't forget the extra water this time, will you?"

Merlin grimaced, recalling his sunstroke incident the summer before. "Don't worry, I won't be doing that again." Tom chuckled, giving him a friendly punch to the shoulder before returning to his duties within the stables. There was a new foal and the young man had been working non-stop for the past few days, something which Merlin admired.

Arthur was sitting on a wall in the citadel when Merlin reached him, taking a bite out of an apple.

"There you are," he exclaimed upon spotting his manservant. "How much slower could you have been?" He let his horse nuzzle his hand, feeding her the rest of the apple and smiling at the gentle creature.

Merlin stared down at his feet. This was just going to be one of those days when he was bombarded with the memories of pre-Camelot and couldn't get the insecurities out of his head. Normally he'd head out to a certain lake and would practise with his magic until he was feeling better but the entire day was going to be taken up with chasing after Arthur while the prince sped his horse into a gallop.

"Hey." Arthur's voice was unusually quiet and gentle as he reached out, resting a hand on Merlin's shoulder. "Are you okay?"

Merlin swallowed past the lump in his throat, his mind whirling in a mixture of emotions. To tell Arthur, to not; to care, to not. Instead he mutely nodded, and turned away to tug himself up and into the saddle, following Arthur and his horse out of the city, the hooves clattering against the cobblestones. The pathway through the field and up into the forest was dusty and dry from the lack of rain and Merlin broke his horse, Willow, into a canter until they had reached the clearing. He wasn't even aware that he bypassed Arthur a while back until the prince drew up next to him, frowning as he leant across to snatch a grip of the reins. Willow slowed to a halt instantly and Merlin reached out to snatch back control when Arthur's hands gripped his own, stopping him.

Take a piece of my heart and make it all your own…

Merlin forced a smile onto his face. "Nothing, just felt like letting her run for a bit." He stroked Willow's neck gently, the hair soft against his fingers.

Arthur's eyes narrowed so that the sky-blue irises appeared darker, noting the way Merlin's smile didn't quite reach his eyes. "Yeah, I don't believe that for a second." He swung himself round and off his horse, leading the mare up the mossy slope until he'd reached the rise of the hill, settling down onto the flattened grass of the lookout over Camelot. There was a brief moment of concern when he genuinely wondered if Merlin would join him before there was a rustling crackle of the leaves parting in Willow's wake and then the raven-haired boy was sinking down to sit next to him.

"You know, you've been my manservant for quite a long time now." Arthur began, not daring to look across, despite the urge to gauge Merlin's reaction. "And surprisingly, I've learnt that you're not an idiot." He shoved Merlin teasingly, mentally congratulating himself as he caught sight of the beginning of a smile. "Most of the time, anyway. The point is that I'd like to think that we're friends."

Merlin went to speak before deciding against it, instead twirling the loose fabric at the base of his shirt between his fingers. Arthur glanced across and frowned, missing the usual cheeky glint in his friend's eyes, and the teasing banter.

"Look," he sighed, leaning forwards to rest his elbows on his legs. "I know I'm a prat sometimes, and unfair too, and you don't deserve it. But you still put up with me, and that goes both ways. You're my friend, Merlin, and I know I don't tell you this enough obviously, because you still keep throwing yourself headfirst into danger despite not even having a sword, but I don't know what I would do if I lost you. Really. I do notice when you have these days when you don't speak very much and just act like you've been stuck in the stocks all night and…well, I'm here. If you ever want to talk. Because the trust and friends' thing works both ways, alright?"

So, when we are apart, you'll never be alone…

"Thank you." Merlin had his eyes closed, his voice small and fractured. Arthur watched him, noting the tensing of his posture and the minute tremors flitting through his shoulders and shifted closer so that he could wrap his arm around the younger boy's back. Merlin relaxed back into the embrace and sniffed, the tears cutting tracks through the dust that had settled across his face. "I will tell you, Arthur, really I will, but today, I just…"

"I get it." Arthur spoke softly, his words tickling the top of Merlin's head. "But hey, it's a pretty nice view from here." Merlin smiled, staring out across the landscape and memorising every detail and the colours of the world in his memories, and the warmth of Arthur pressed to his back, the supporting arm wrapped affectionately around him.

Reaching across, he plucked the dandelion from the patch beside him, twirling it between his fingers absent mindedly. Arthur watched him, trying to hide the fond smile crossing his features before speaking.

"You're supposed to make a wish or something, aren't you?"

Merlin's eyes widened in recognition of the words, but he didn't speak, instead simply nodding.

"Well, go on then."

You'll never be alone…

Arthur was almost always there for the bad days. To be fair, they spent most of their time around each other so it was rare that a day went past without Merlin meeting his friend at some point, but with Arthur's ever increasing list of duties to the kingdom, sometimes Merlin couldn't help but miss the old days when they could just go out into the forest and enjoy each other's company. Yet, even with everything seemingly trying to tear their friendship apart, Arthur was still there for Merlin and Merlin would always be there for Arthur, even if his friend never knew who it was who sent those mysterious tree branches falling down onto enemy heads.

Most of the time, anyway. Merlin had come down with some mysterious form of the flu, and after running himself into the ground with exhaustion anyway, he'd been hit hard, and Gaius had been genuinely concerned for him for well over a week. Reluctant to leave, but assured that Merlin was well on the mend, Arthur had left to attend a meeting to continue the current treaty held between Camelot and several other kingdoms in the vicinity. He'd been gone two days, and Merlin had finally been allowed to get up and walk around a while when one of his sad days hit him like a carthorse and he found himself sitting up in the highest point of the castle turrets.

He lay back, feeling the cold of the stonework seeping through his thin shirt into his back and laced his fingers together across his chest. Part of him longed to use his magic, just a touch, but the sensible sector of his mind recalled seeing a guard on duty at the door just a few metres downstairs and he didn't feel like being executed just yet. He missed Arthur's cheerfulness during these times, and the feel of the wind in his hair when taking the horses out. Maybe he could call Kilgharrah? Except that Gaius would have his head if he dared to leave the castle grounds while still technically unwell, and he'd worried his mentor enough already this week.

When you miss me close your eyes, I may be far but never gone…

Merlin opened his eyes, the moonlight reflecting pure silver in his pupils. Above him, stars lit the diamond canopy of the night-sky, beautiful and unknown. Breathing in deep, he tasted the familiar burning wood and scents of Camelot upon the breeze, and listened to the distant laughter of children in the lower town, out later than usual, accompanied by the flapping of the Pendragon flag attached to the top of the turret. If Merlin reached out any further then he could just touch it. What seemed ever stranger to him was how close the stars seemed, and the warm feeling of comfort that Arthur would be under the very same stars.

When you fall asleep, remember we lay under the same stars…

"Merlin! Thank God!" Strong arm wrapped around his shoulders and lower back, pulling him towards a warm chest that was a complete contrast of the cold stonework Merlin had fallen asleep on. Blinking sleepily, he opened his eyes to a red and blond blur, frowning as his vision began to clear slightly.

"Arthur?" He whispered, listening to the pounding of his friend's heartbeat as Arthur clung to him.

"You idiot. I left for one day, Merlin, and you manage to disappear whilst still ill." Arthur shook his head, his eyes red-rimmed and dry tear-tracks stark against his pale face evidence enough that he had been worried. "I didn't…Merlin, you're so cold. I thought you were…" He choked back the words and knitted the fabric of Merlin's shirt between his fingers, resting his forehead to the raven-haired man's shoulders.

"Bad day," Merlin murmured, splaying his fingers out across Arthur's back. It was unlike the blond to keep a hug on for so long, and he couldn't help but feel guilty for worrying Arthur so. He could only imagine how Gaius must be feeling. "I'm sorry."

"You know," Arthur began tentatively, shifting so that their backs rested against the wall. "A while ago you promised that you would tell me."

"Did I use those exact words? I don't think I did."

"Merlin." Arthur rebuked him, but his voice was tinged with light-hearted amusement. He lowered his voice to a more serious tone. "Really though."

"Alright."

And hey, I know there are some things we need to talk about…

Arthur sat up straighter, listening intently as Merlin closed his eyes, breathing deeply. "You know I grew up without a father. Mother tried her best, but we were on our own and people scorned her for being unmarried and having a bastard for a son." Arthur flinched at the words, subconsciously tightening his grip around Merlin's shoulders. "Kids are cruel, y'know? And it turns out that their parents are as well…"

Merlin lowered his gaze to the floor, trying to hold back the tears as he spoke. The explanation sounded stupid to his own ears and he caught himself mentally hurling the same insults at himself as the entire village had all those years ago, but forced himself to carry on.

And I can't stay…

Silence fell for a few moments. "You never told me. How bad they treated you, I mean."

Merlin stared down at the people below. They scurried about their daily lives like ants, and the idea fascinated him. Anything to avoid looking at Arthur right now, anyway.

"I'm sorry. You, of all people, don't deserve that."

"Yeah, well." Merlin shrugged, and Arthur reached across, tilting his chin up with two fingers until Merlin was forced to meet his gaze, ocean eyes swimming with tears. "You know I never told anyone, right?"

Just let me hold you for a little longer now…

"You know I never had a real friend before you, right?" Arthur replied pointedly. The sunrise streaked across the horizon in pastel hues, so similar to the sunset so many years previously.

"Hey, look. It's a new day."

And Merlin smiled.

Never be alone…

Okay, and that's a wrap! What d'you think? Please let me know, even if you just write a :) I really appreciate it!

Feel free to comment songs and I will see you guys very soon!

Kat x.