For Bade Prompts round #4. My prompt was – surprise, surprise! - enough time.
I don't own Victorious, obviously, for I am not a troll.
(I'm really not happy with the beginning of this story, but it gets better, I swear. Give it a chance please.)
Enough Time.
The last thing she wants to do after all that happened, is celebrate with her so-called friends at the after-party of the Platinum Music Awards. But somewhere in the middle of cheering for Tori and everyone else praising the brunette to the skies, Jade found herself being dragged along before she could even grasp what was happening.
And now she is stuck sitting at a table with none other than Robbie and his stupid puppet, a drink clasped tightly in her hands, while everyone else had thought it would be a good idea to walk around and annoy celebrities that had been at the show, too, or dance to awful (in Jade's opinion) music on the ridiculously small dance floor in the middle of the room.
The images of her ex-boyfriend's face just inches away from Tori's keep replaying in her head and she just can't shake them off and doubts she ever will. She isn't mad at Tori. She wishes she was, though, that it was her fault. She wishes that Tori had been the one to lean in and that Beck had been the one to reject her, not the other way round. And she feels helpless, because there is nothing she or anyone could do to change this fact. Beck tried to kiss Tori, and this realization makes her feel like everything they once had is lost for good.
Her thoughts must have been visible on her face, because suddenly Robbie is giving her a worried glance. "Is everything okay, Jade?" he asks carefully.
"Don't talk to me," she snaps and gives him a glare, before resting her chin on her hand and turning her head to get a better view of the dance floor. She spots Andre and Cat dancing, and also Tori talking to Mason Thornesmith at the other side of the room. He's probably congratulating her on her spectacular performance, she concludes bitterly. Who she doesn't see is, to her surprise, Beck, who she was expecting to find next to Tori, drooling over her mere existence.
But Beck isn't with Tori. And neither is he on the dance floor with Cat and Andre or anywhere else in her sight. He's probably making out with some hot socialite in a dark corner, she decides and sighs. When did the whole world start turning on her? Everything used to be okay, and now it feels like her life is gliding through her hands.
A slight cough makes her snap out of her thoughts and she turns around to send whoever decided to bother her away. She is not in the mood to deal with anyone at all right now, and so she clothes her face in the deadliest glare she can muster. But standing right behind her, she finds none other than Beck Oliver. And it takes all of her self-control and acting skills for her jaw not to drop to her feet. What could he possibly want from her? She feels all of her held-back feelings swelling up in her chest at once and she is just a heartbeat away from flinging all she knows (all she has seen) in his teeth.
But instead, she settles for a simple (yet very annoyed) "What?".
Beck glances at Robbie, who is trying to act like he didn't even notice him, but is obviously deeply interested in what is happening, and seems to change his initial plans spontaneously. He gives Jade a weak smile. "You wanna dance?"
She is taken aback for a second (it's surprising enough that he even showed up at her table), but then she scoffs. "With you?"
"He surely isn't talking about Robbie, baby," Rex says and she shoots Robbie a glare. He lifts his hands apologetically.
Jade turns back around to face Beck and eyes him suspiciously in an attempt to find out what on earth his intentions are. His hands are dug in his pockets and he has that sheepish look on his face that gives her butterflies in her stomach. "Please?" he says and quickly motions to Robbie with his eyes to signal that he wants to talk to her alone.
She hesitates, pondering over her options. Neither dancing with Beck, nor being stuck with Robbie all evening sounds too tempting, but as she gives the weird, nerdy boy another glance (she could swear that his dumb puppet just winked at her), she decides that getting away from him can't be all that bad, even if she has to deal with her ex-boyfriend in return. And so she takes a deep breath and gets up from her seat, smoothing her (ridiculously pink and fluffy) dress.
Beck smiles and offers her his arm, but she just rolls her eyes and starts walking toward the dance floor without him. He grants Robbie a quick, friendly nod before hurrying after her. Jade still isn't sure what he is playing at. She hasn't even made up her mind what this dumb smile he gave her during the show meant yet, and all of this is just confusing to her. But she would rather die than show her insecurity.
And of course, as fate has it, as soon as he catches up with her, the DJ decides to play a slower song than all the ones before. Jade groans audibly, and Beck just smiles and shrugs. They stand there awkwardly for a moment, before he clears his throat and pulls her body closer to him, resting his hands on her waist. She flinches at the touch (it's been too long and it's like reopening all old sores and she can't deal with all those feelings he gives her), but reluctantly places her arms around his neck anyway and they start moving to the music.
"So," she says after a long awkward silence. She isn't sure how much longer she can take all of this. Being so close to him, while being so far apart. His touch seems to burn through her dress. Out of the corners of her eyes she finds Tori and Andre staring at them from a safe distance. (Of course.)
"So," he replies using the same tone as her. She looks at him and as soon as they lock eyes, he feels all of his feelings boiling up, and it takes all of his strength not to press his lips on hers right here and now and kiss her until everything is okay again between them. But he doesn't. Not as long as there are so many unspoken problems and questions hanging in the air. Instead he continues talking. "It was great what you did for Tori."
"Yeah, I'm sure that made you happy," she deadpans and he feels her tensing up under his grip.
He narrows his eyes in confusion. "What?"
"Oh please, Beck," she says, rolling her eyes. "You've been over her all week and I saw how you-" She hesitates for a moment, carefully thinking her words over, and changes her plans. "I saw how supportive of her you were."
"Look," he sighs. "Tori is my friend, okay? Of course I'm happy for her when she gets a chance like that."
Jade laughs dryly. "Oh, so I'm not even your friend anymore?"
"Of course you are, Jade!" Beck replies indignantly. "But it was Tori's turn. She won that competition."
"Her turn," she repeats slowly and has to hold back her laughter at the irony. Her turn to shine? Isn't it always her turn? Was it ever Jade's turn in the first place? Or was it Tori's turn to get Beck? The scenes she saw through Cat's PearBook flash before her eyes again and suddenly she is disgusted with being so close to him. With his hands on her waist, hands that probably were all over Tori just a day ago. She pushes him away from her. "I gotta go."
But he holds her back. "Jade, please," he says and tightens his grip around her.
"Let me go, Beck," she hisses and struggles to get free. He won't let her.
"Jade, I don't want us to be like this."
"Let. Go."
"Let me just-"
"I know that you tried to kiss Tori, okay?" she spats. "I know." And suddenly he lets her go, gaping at her. Even though she could just walk away now, she feels unable to move and they stare at each other in silence. She feels her eyes filling up with tears, their salt burning, but she never lets them fall.
"How do you-"
"The webcam."
"Oh."
They are standing in the middle of a crowd full of dancing people and suddenly it feels like time is going in slow motion. Jade wraps her arms around her body, lips pressed together tightly, and her eyes locked to his. "I-," Beck starts, but he doesn't really know how to continue. He takes a deep breath and says the only thing he can think of. "I'm sorry."
She just keeps staring daggers at him without saying a word, but she doesn't even have to, because he knows. He knows that she won't be able to forgive him this and that it's probably useless to even try, but he is at a lack of words and doesn't know anything else to say. "I'm so sorry, Jade."
Slowly, she starts shaking her head. "No, you're not," she says. He gives her a confused look. "I saw what happened, Beck. I saw everything. I saw how you leaned in and how Tori was the one to reject you. I saw how you tried to persuade her into kissing you and I heard what you said about me. And I can assure you that you were fully aware of what you were doing, so don't you dare lie to me."
Beck stares at her helplessly. He opens his mouth, but closes it again. "I don't know what to say," he admits eventually.
Jade nods. "Thought so," she replies quietly, turns around and starts heading toward the exit. She can't stay here any longer. She can't go back to their table and act like nothing happened. She knows they were all watching them, and that they would either ask stupid questions or stare at her awkwardly. So she does the only thing that seems right to her and leaves, leaving Beck speechless.
/ / /
She doesn't drive straight home. She doesn't want to have to deal with her family and explain to them why she didn't perform, after she announced it at dinner the night before and made sure that they were watching, so that they could see that her dreams weren't stupid after all.
Instead, she drives to a park near their school. It's an old habit of hers to go there to think or when she's mad or upset about something. It is probably not the safest thing to do, to go to a dark place after midnight, as a girl, in a big city, but Jade couldn't care less about that right now. She sits down on the first bench she finds and rests her face in her hands. She doesn't cry (she is Jade West after all), she just takes a few deep breaths in an attempt to blow away the cobwebs.
But once again, her thoughts are clouded with Beck. Beck and Tori. Beck's hands on her. Beck looking at her. Beck not opening the door. Beck, Beck, Beck. She wishes she could forget about him once and for all, but even though it's been three months since they broke up and he has clearly moved on, she just can't get rid of her feelings for him and she hates herself for that. She hates being dependent.
She isn't sure how long she has been sitting on that park bench, when she suddenly hears footsteps coming closer. Alarmed, she sits up and narrows her eyes, trying to see through the darkness, but all she can recognize is a mere silhouette. The person approaches fast and Jade ponders over her options, but finds that running away or hiding is none, considering that she wears a huge, sparkly, pink dress and ten inch heels. She has to face whoever is coming.
"Jade," the person says, and she is relieved that the voice is more than familiar to her. Beck comes to a halt right in front of her. "There you are."
"Here I am," she scoffs in her usual perky tone, crossing her arms and glaring up to her ex-boyfriend. "But why are you here?"
"To talk to you," he replies, burying his hands in his pockets and hunching his shoulders sheepishly.
"How did you even find me?"
"Well," he says. "We dated for three years, I happen to know some stuff about you."
She glares at him. "Creep."
"Hey, it still took me two hours to find you, so I'm not even close to the stalker level Sinjin has obtained," he grins and his heart skips a beat at the little smile that he sees playing on her lips. Growing in confidence, he sits down next to her on the bench and gives her a smile that is much like the one they shared at the Platinum Music Awards a few hours ago. Her eyes wander from him to the starless city sky and they sit in silence for a minute or two, before he speaks again. "I really am sorry, Jade. I know this won't make up for it, but I don't even know what I was doing. I don't like Tori like that. At all. And trust me, if there was a way to undo it, I would."
"Too bad there is none," she says, her eyes still fixed on the sky.
"So what do you want me to do to make it better?" he asks.
She huffs. "Nothing. You can't do anything, Beck. There's no use crying over spilled milk."
"Jade," he says, and before he knows it, he has put her hand in his, squeezing it lightly. Finally, she detaches her eyes from the sky to glance at their hands first, before she faces him. And she hates the tingling sensation that is growing in her stomach. "I love you," Beck whispers. "And only you."
She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath to recollect herself. "It's not that easy, Beck."
"I know. But that doesn't change how I feel."
She bites her lip, glancing at their entwined hands. "I can't forgive you just like that."
"Jade, please," he says. "Give me a-"
"Let me finish," she interrupts him impatiently. "I can't forgive you now, Beck. But maybe in the future."
He furrows his eyebrows, giving her a stern look. "But how far into the future? When?"
"When I've had enough time."
Beck nods slowly. "So time will fix our problems?"
"Maybe," she says. "Maybe, if we just give it enough time."
And with that she gets up and vanishes into the night, leaving behind a trail of pink and a boy with a broken heart.
.
Time does not heal, but healing takes time.
.
I dedicate this to my soul mate Suzy, who also helped me with the ending. You should check out her stories, her username is imlaughingnow and she's brilliant. Enough said.
Can I just say that I really hate Beck? He's a jerk. And honestly, if I was Jade, I wouldn't take him back.
So. Review if you want. Or not. I don't even know what this is. Okay.