Yay Finally its up! This story has been my baby since...about the middle of June. It's completely different than anything else I've ever written, and its also the longest thing I've ever written :-). Forgive any mistakes you find, because I start to type fast and skip or write the wrong words...and I don't have a beta :-(. I liked the idea of different points of view from my story The Lost and The Broken, so I went along the same path in this one, only a different character's point of view each chapter. I also named each chapter after a song title. Because I felt like it. There is also OOC in this story, because some characters I just really suck at writing. (Ex. Saix X-( )
I am also fairly certain no mental institute anywhere in the world is run in this fashion, has horribly named hallways, and any other mental hospital crack you are bound to find this story.
Disclaimer: I own nothing from Kingdom Hearts, names, Klondike bars, hot pockets, etc. I think I even got the name Dr. Reynolds of a diet pill commercial...
Rated M for foul language, hints of sexual activities, actual sexual contact, boy on boy love, some violence, character death, and lots and lots of nifty crack.
Pairings: Marluxia/Saix Demyx/Zexion a tad bit of Marluxia/Vexen and a possible Axel/Roxas and maybe a surprise pairing...maybe...
Oh yea, and vegetable lasagna is actually the best thing on this planet, but I made it sound kind of yucky in here. Don't listen to me. It's the best thing ever. Go eat some.
Chapter 1
Mad World
(Zexion)
And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad. The dreams in which I'm dying are the best I've ever had. –Gary Jules
"I'm not insane." How many times had I told him this? Ten? Fifteen?
"Zexion, we've already been over this. No one is calling you insane." I huffed and turned my eyes away from him again. I wished he would leave me alone and just let me go home. But then again, I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to go there either. My own mother thought I was crazy too, that's why she brought me to this mental hospital in the first place. She was the reason Dr. Reynolds was giving me the look he was right now.
"You attempted suicide and seem to be deeply troubled by…" I blocked out his voice and stared out the window instead. Where the hell was Ienzo? He promised he would be here to help bail me out, since it was kind of his fault I was here anyway.
"Zexion!" I was suddenly aware of the aging doctor's big hand on my arm. I focused my eyes reluctantly on him. His eyes were hard, his mouth a thin line of aggravation. "Have you been listening to a word I've been telling you?"
"Yea. You told me I was suicidal, even though I'm not." I stared back at him, willing him to remove his hand and stop looking at me like that.
"Well what would you call it then?" I gave him a confused look, forcing him to explain. "What would you say happened?"
I couldn't take it anymore. I shrugged myself away from his touch. "Ienzo told me that it's what I had to do. We had many long discussions about it."
The so called doctor leaned back in his chair and rubbed his temples. "Oh Zexion not Ienzo again. You know he doesn't exist."
"Yes, he does." I felt my face immediately flare with heat. Ienzo was my best and only friend, my mentor. He told me everything I ever needed to know and had been with me through everything since I was ten years old.
"Let's just pretend he exists. Just this once. How would you describe your connection to him?" Dr. Reynolds continued, putting heavy emphasis on the word pretend. I was starting to strongly dislike the way he crossed one leg to rest his heel on his left knee and the way he clasped his hands together across his oversized stomach.
"Ienzo is kind of like...an alter ego to me per say, but he has a lot more intelligence than I do." I leaned back in my chair, doing a bad impression of his posture to see what he would do. He ignored it.
"Seems to me that Ienzo is a bad influence. He is the main reason you are here." He glanced down at his watch. "I wonder where your mother is."
As if on queue my mother burst through the heavy wooden door, carrying a small duffel bag. She dropped it carelessly on the floor, running to me and pulling me into a hug as if it had been months and not mere days since she had seen me last.
"Oh baby I've missed you!" She plopped down into the chair next to me, giving me a warm smile. I tried to smile back at her in reassurance, but it was hard given the fact I was about to be admitted into a mental hospital. Where the hell was Ienzo?
Dr. Reynolds went into discussion with my mother, and I went back to staring fretfully out the window. If Ienzo didn't get here soon, who knew what would happen? The sudden silencing of voices and the scratch of a pen brought me out of my worried sense of mind. I turned around to discover my mother signing something.
"What's that?" Neither of them bothered to answer me, though their reactions to my question were evident. My mother's cheeks flared slightly red, and Dr. Reynolds cleared his throat and shifted positions in his chair. Both of them refused eye contact with me, so I leaned forward to see what it was.
Admittance Papers.
"Mom…" My voice came out barely in a worried whisper, but she hear my anyway. Instantly she put down the pen and looked at me, care and anxiousness filling her eyes. Reynolds was staring at me too.
"You can't sign anything until Ienzo gets here." My mother's face fell instantly, making my stomach clench. Reynolds eyes hardened.
"Honey no matter what…I…Ie…Ienzo says, you need to stay here just for a little while. It will help you." She looked steadily into my eyes, as if begging me to agree with her.
I couldn't
"I don't need anyone's help." I resisted the urge to cringe at how whiny my voice sounded.
"This will be good for you Zexion, I promise. I'm sure you'll grow to like…" She never got to assure me of what I would soon grow to like. The heavy door slammed open for a second time that afternoon as a blonde boy danced his way into the overly crowded room.
"Hey Dr. R." The boy said, flopping down on one of the many couches. He was wearing a plain, light blue t-shirt and simply grey sweatpants. He also had one of the weirdest hairstyles I had ever seen. It was kind of a mullet, but also a mohawk. The image of him made my stomach churn all the more. Where was my mother sending me?
"Ah Demyx. I had forgotten our special appointment today. I'll be with you in a minute."
My mother had left me. Signed a couple more papers and left, despite my protests, begging, and then down right pleading. Left me alone in this place full of insane and psychopathic people, leaving me no other choice but to solemnly follow some nurse down a maze of hallways to my new "room." I carried the duffel bag on my shoulder, clutching my notebook to my chest. I was already weirded out enough, and we weren't even halfway to my room yet.
A florescent light swung to and fro from the slightly cracked ceiling, casting eerie shadows across already torn and hideous faces. An old man was sitting hunched over in a worn-out wheel chair, rocking back and forth and muttering to himself something inaudible and incoherent to the rest of the world. A middle aged woman who was leaning on the door to her room, her hard glare fixed on me as I passed by, her long blonde hair sticking out in all directions.
And then Ienzo decided to finally show up.
His hair was perfectly in place as always, not a strand independently standing out. The rest of him, however, was frazzled. His long scientist like coat was unbuttoned except for one button in the middle, which was shoved into the wrong slit on the other side, the tails billowing out behind him. His dark colored shirt was crumpled, looking like he had pulled it out of the dryer before it had dried completely. His eyes kept darting around, and he seemed hurried.
"Where have you been?" I hissed under my breath. I couldn't help but be mad at him somewhat for abandoning me when I needed him the most.
Ienzo shrugged, as if my being declared mentally insane wasn't that important. "I was busy and I couldn't come right away. I glared at my slightly egotistical counter part. I swear sometimes he could be so selfish.
"Well thanks to your oh so busy schedule I've been officially labeled a suicidal insane freak." The women leading me glanced back curiously at me over her shoulder.
"Keep your voice down!" Ienzo sounded just as pissed off at me as I was at him, though I saw no reason for him to be so.
"I can't help it when my life has been ruined!" We turned a corner into a new hallway, where the bright lights were flickering off and on occasionally, making everything around me look even more grotesque. Ienzo put his hands on his hips, giving me the "Look." The Look was his special way of telling me to shut up and that I was being melodramatic and over-reacting.
"Zexion hush. You are over-reacting again. Just calm down and listen to me. We'll get you out of this…eventually." Ienzo murmured, his eyes still darting to and fro across the long gloomy hallway.
"How, oh great Ienzo, how?" I snapped back. The aforementioned scientist sighed heavily, closing his eyes. I was vaguely aware of the nurse ahead of us listening silently to our conversation.
"I don't know at this particular moment in time Zex, so chill. Besides, I warned you if you used pills it wouldn't work." Ienzo looked away from me pretending to be absorbed in studying a man with blue hair who was sitting on a bench outside of an office.
I started to come back with a snap reply, but I silenced as soon as I caught sight of the blue-haired man. He was dressed similar to the blonde boy I had seen earlier in Dr. Reynolds office, a plain t-shirt and sweatpants, both in black. He was sitting leisurely on the bench, hands brought together over his knees. He didn't look like he belonged here at all, a refreshing change from the lunatics I was seeing around every turn. He gave off the vibe that he was surprisingly stable. But his eyes scared me. The yellow-ish colored irises seemed to bore into Ienzo and I, giving me the sense that he was staring right through my exterior, discovering all my secrets and my past. It made me shiver and look away as we continued our shuffle down the hallway. Ienzo, however, held his gaze strong upon the other man as we trudged passed him. Ienzo was good at glaring people down and getting them to submit. The man, however, did not. I could still feel his heated gaze on my back until we turned another corner.
Ienzo cleared his throat to get my attention again. "As I was saying, you should have used the gun. It would have been full-proof." Ienzo's voice was emotionless, fueling my inner fire that was presiding in my belly all the more.
"You said it once and you said there would have been a lot of bloodshed. I couldn't have done that to my mother!" As I was shout-whispering we passed by a man with a long streaked pony tail and an eye-patch. The look on his face was both confused and slightly amused. Ienzo tugged on my arm impatiently, forcing me to look away from the eye patch holder.
"I wasn't all gung-ho for the idea in the first place. Do you think I really wanted to lose you? I just went along with it because it was what you cared about so much." Ienzo narrowed his eyes as he hissed at me. "Why the hell do you think I disappeared before you did it?"
"I didn't want to give my mom any more trouble in her life! And if you were oh so disapproving why didn't you…" I let my voice trail as I spotted yet another couple of people watching me. This time it was two boys who couldn't have been much older than me staring at me much like the blue-haired man two or three hallways ago. I was getting tired of random people watching me. One boy had extremely red hair, styled in the most peculiar fashion, its spikes of all sizes shooting up in several directions, yet it looked styled and well put together at the same time. But what attracted me more were his eyes. They were a brilliant shade of green; with two almost tear drop shaped tattoos underneath them. He was wearing a grey t-shirt and dark blue sweatpants. The other boy was just slightly shorter than the other, but only by an inch or two. Both of them almost towered over me. The slightly shorter boy had rosy colored hair that tumbled down just passed his shoulders. His bright blue eyes were glinting as he watched me pass. He was wearing a long-sleeved plain black shirt and red sweatpants with white stripes up the side. The red-head smirked as we passed by them.
"Ignore them. Just ignore everyone right now, ok? Everyone in here are just lunatics, and you're just a pretty new face to look at." Ienzo growled. He often told me that my looks distracted people and got me into trouble. I don't believe him. I pushed him slightly as the nurse turned a finally corner and stopped in outside a worn wooden door with 379E printed across it in pale, yellow lettering. I glanced down the hallway I was in, noticing the walls were the same pale yellow as the numbers on my door. There were twelve doors in total in the bright yet desolate hallway.
"Here we are Zexion. Home sweet home." The cheerfully fake girl said, pushing the door open with great gusto. She ushered me inside, Ienzo right her. She informed me of when dinner was and left.
I heart the unmistakable sound of a key sliding into the lock.
Perfect. Now I was trapped like a doomed lab rat. Ienzo scoffed, surveying the tiny room.
"Zex, I'm sorry but I've got to leave. But don't worry. I'll be back as soon as a can and we will get you out of the conundrum." He voice was surprisingly soft, as if the sight of my prison cell had made the situation of my problem suddenly unmistakably real.
Ienzo put his arms around me in a soft of hug, though it was brief. He pulled back and smiled back at me, ruffling my hair.
Then, just like that, he was gone.
I envied his ability to come and go as he pleased, no matter where he was or what ever was going on.
I set the duffel bag down on the shaggy carpet and set my notebook on the desk. I surveyed the small space. A double bed was shoved in the farthest corner of the room. A closet was imbedded in the wall closest to the foot of the bed. I opened it to examine its size. There was barely enough room for me to stand comfortably in it.
Next to the closest was a deep cut in the wall, where the dresser was. It had four drawers in it. The desk was parallel to the bed on the wall near the door. Two long shelves were on the empty wall that ran from the desk to the bed. A small nightstand was propped up next to the bed. The quilt, carpet, and the walls themselves were all unfortunately the same sickening bright sunny yellow as the hallway. The bottom third of the wall was covered with a wooden pattern of both shallow and deep cut diamonds. A thick trim ran across both the bottoms and tops of the walls. Everything wood in the room, on the walls, the desk, shelves, dresser etc, was the same exact light shade of wood.
There was a small waste basket made of yellow plastic next to the desk. Two wooden cabinets mounted the wall above the closet. There was no adjoining door to a bathroom.
That was it.
Wearily I sank onto the edge of the bed. I couldn't stay here. The bright yellow was already making me feel queasy, which wasn't good considering if I was locked in here with not bathroom access. What happened if I needed to…
A pale blue piece of paper was placed on the top of the puffy yellow comforter in the middle of the bed, catching my eye and delaying my nausea because it wasn't a nasty yellow like everything else and was almost calming to look at. I picked it up gingerly and started to read the dark print:
Greetings Zexion:
We are hoping you find your room both comforting and homely.
We extend our deepest love and concern to you and know you will find your stay here worthwhile. You have been deemed mentally and physically stable enough to eat meals in the dining hall (under guidance). We encourage you to converse with your fellow companions.
Meal times are as follows:
Breakfast: 8:30 A.M.
Lunch: 1:00 P.M.
Dinner: 7:00 P.M.
Attached to this paper is a list of rules and regulations you are expected to oblique to and follow. You are required to wear the uniform of plain shirts (long and short sleeved) and cotton made sweatpants.
Your counseling and therapy group times will be given to you at a later time. Since you are currently enrolled in high school, you will attend classes four days a week. This schedule will be given to you along with your counseling schedule.
We hope you will find great solace and reassurance here in your new home.
The Ballatine Staff
I kept staring at the paper, partly because it wasn't yellow and partly because I didn't want to believe its words. Counseling? Therapy sessions? A dress code? This was just getting worse and worse by the minute. I moaned, leaning back against the bed, closing my eyes so the yellow wouldn't blur my vision and make me nauseous again.
After what seemed like hours I opened my eyes again to look at the small digital clock on the desk across the room. 6:30. I had mixed feeling about dinner. I was exactly one to hop right in the crowd and converse, especially given the current situation. But then again, I was accepting of anything that got me away from my own personal splatter of sunshine.
I heaved myself off of the bed, and opened the black duffel bag. Sweat pants and plain long and short sleeved shirts of several different colors filled the bag. I pulled out the few non-plain shirts and jeans and dress pants, putting each item carefully away in the top drawer of the dresser. I then sorted through my new boring attire before I chose a short sleeved black shirt and grey sweatpants. The rest of the clothes I threw haphazardly into the other drawers of the dresser and shoved the bag into one of the cabinets.
After changing I sat down in the desk chair, wishing Ienzo was here to help me or at least keep me company. I let my mind drift, wondering what you had to do around her to be able to personalize your prison cell room. If I could get enough posters and maybe some dark curtains, I could mellow down the yellow. And I wanted books. I needed them. My mother had been thoughtful enough to throw some books into my duffel bag, but they wouldn't last me long in this place. I had already placed the four books on the lower shelf, despising how empty it looked.
A loud knock on the door startled me out of my thoughts. I heard the lock creak as a different woman than before bustled in, a cheery shit-eating-grin plastered across her already wide face.
"I'm here to take you to the dining hall for dinner!" Her voice was too loud, too scratchy and energetic, too fake. I gave her a loathing look, but all did was wave it away with a flip of her drab orange curls with a fat hand.
"Oh pish-posh Zexion, don't be like that. Now come!" She barked out the last to words bossily, grabbing my wrists and forcing me to stand up. Before I had the chance to argue with her she pushed me out into the hallway, ushering me into the main hallway and down the stairs to the main floor.
I growled heavy obscenities at her as she dragged me through the dining hall by my arm.
"See this isn't so bad now is it sugar?" The annoyingly dense woman said in her fake cheery tone. "Just get some food and find a place to sit! I'll be back soon to take you back to your room!" What was I? I five year old that needed his hand held to walk across the street? I her retreating back a look of death before reluctantly joining the line of depressed and psychotic people, scanning the dim room for an empty table that I could sit at.
"If you play along with her 'the world is a happy place' attitude, she'll eventually leave you alone." The deep voice behind me made my jump as I spun to face the owner of it. The man standing in front of me had to by far have the creepiest eyes I had ever seen. The bright orange flame irises felt like they were staring into my soul. Long, straight shiny silver (not grey) hair cascaded down well passed his shoulders. He towered over a foot above me. His shirt was deep blue, his pants black.
"She only goes after people who defy her and are normal." He continued, looking down at me.
"Normal? Who here would you define and normal?" I raised an eyebrow and him. He smiled as if I was amusing to him. I turned my head away.
"There is a group of us here, who don't really belong. There is nothing wrong with any of us, just misunderstood per say. We possess what you may call…alter egos." My head snapped up to look at him again. The dim lights caused his blank expression to look viler than what was meant. I took a step back, but managed to hold his eyes.
"What were you put in here for?" He said, suddenly changing the subject as we inched forward in the line. I gave him an odd look, but something urged me to answer him truthfully anyway."
"Ienzo." I tired to keep my voice flat and emotionless.
"And who is Ienzo? What did he do?" I narrowed my eyes at him again. We had almost reached the food servers.
"Well it's kind of hard to explain. I guess it's not all Ienzo's fault, but he basically helped me with my decision to commit suicide, and on top of that everyone acts like he isn't there and doesn't believe he exists. He's kind of like my…alter…ego…"My voice slowed and got lower as I remembered what he had said earlier. We possess what you may call alter egos.
The man smiled as if in victory as he picked up a tray and placed it on the slider. "You're one of us then." He said softly, so no one else could hear him but me. "I had a feeling you were when I first laid eyes on you." I stayed silent, following his actions and picking up a tray from the stack.
"What's your name anyway?" He reached out to accept a bowl of salad from one of the women behind the counter before he answered me. "Xemnas. And what is yours?"
"Zexion." I took a bowl from the lady too, following Xemnas down the line.
"Zexion." Xemnas repeated my name as if he was tasting it. "Come sit with us." He took another plate from different woman with something that looked like vegetable lasagna.
"Alright. Who's us?" I approached the spot Xemnas had just vacated and took my own plate of the goop. I slide the tray to the end, grabbing a foam cup and turned around to face all the tables. Xemnas was waiting for me.
"Us," He said, "Is everyone else here who are similar to you."
"So how many 'normal' ones are there of you?" I asked, maneuvering around an ancient lady who was standing in the middle of two tables, looking lost.
"Ten. Eleven, counting you." He rounded another table, heading towards the very back of the dining hall were there was hardly any monitors lurking about.
My eyes were still trying to adjust the poor lighting as Xemnas finally stopped next to a group of rectangular tables that had been shoved together to make one long table, and even then the people sitting around the table were crunched closely together. Xemnas sat down at the head of the table as if it were his rightful place. Everyone else at the table seemed to have a spot too, almost just like highschool. I was about to turn away and find a generally empty corner to sit and wallow in my own sorrows when a man with short reddish-brown hair and the one sitting next to him scooted away from each other while the whole table shifted around just to make room for me. Not knowing what else to do I cautiously sat down in the empty spot. Glancing at the blue haired man next to me I recognized him as the same guy I had seen earlier sitting on the bench with the striking yellowish eyes. I shifted my eyes around the table, trying to avoid catching his gaze again. I recognized a few others too. The two boys who had been standing together in the hallway, the man with the streaked ponytail and eye patch, and the boy with the mohawk/mullet who had burst into Dr. Reynolds' office.
"Who's the kid?" A man with serious side burns and almost dreadlock like hair asked, everyone else waiting for Xemnas' answer.
"His name is Zexion. He's one of us. I told you we were getting closer to being thirteen." Xemnas replied, spinning his slab of lasagna around, his voice as casual as if he were describing the weather forecast for the following Thursday. Table conversation died for some reason after that, though I was aching to be able to match a name to each face around me. I glanced down at my plate, deciding the food on the plastic square looked unappetizing. I didn't feel very hungry anyway.
"So what's your hall?" The man to my right's deep voice broke the silence, making me wince. I was considering just not answering him, but everyone had turned their attention to me.
"Um…Sunshine Sanctuary." I mumbled, straining to remember the name that had been on a plaque in the middle of the hall and across the top of my welcome paper. This earned a couple of snorts and stifled smiles across the table.
"Hey no worries Luxord's stuck in happy sunshine hell with you." The spiky red head said, smiling brightly at me. "Names Axel, by the way." He added, picking his food absentmindedly apart piece by piece. I took a mental note of his face to his name and started scanning the others faces for one that looked like a Luxord.
Luckily Axel took care of it for me by naming everyone off by what hall they resided in. During his explanation I learned three things. 1) I was lucky someone was in the same hall as me, 2) Everyone's name and location of course and 3) Who ever named these hallways needed some serious therapy themselves.
I scrambled to store in my memory everyone's name. The mohawk/mullet boy was named Demyx and he and a serious blonde haired man named Vexen resided in Peaceful Oceans. The blue-haired next to me was named Saix and lives in Meadows of Green. Axel lived in Strawberry Fields that he claimed matched the color of his hair. Lexaeus was the man to my right with the short hair and lived in the hallway across from mine, Winter Wonderland. The extreme side burned individual presided in Orange Blossoms was named Xaldin. Rosy hair boy turned out to be Marluxia, who was in Waves of Indigo. The eye patch holder was Xigbar who lived in Peach Orchids. Finally Xemnas was trapped in Purple Paradise. I also learned I could have gotten put in the Creamy Pink hallways, making me appreciate my own little private hell of yellow a bit more.
"So what did you exactly do to land yourself in here?" The man two places away from me, Xaldin I think, said, turning to look down at me.
"Well Ienzo and I planned out a suicide for me so life for my mom would be easier without me, so I downed a couple of bottles of pills." Why was I telling this all to a group of people of whom I had known a mere five minutes?
Before he could answer, my hall mate, Luxord, piped in. "So they declared you mentally unstable and on the borderline of insanity because you talked to someone they couldn't see so they threw you in here." I stared blankly at him. It was almost as if he could read my mind.
"Have all you done the same thing?" I asked in general to the table.
Most of them shook their heads. "No. The only other ones who tried the suicide approach were Marluxia, Xigbar, Demyx and I." Vexen cut in, stirring water around in his little Styrofoam cup.
Over the course of the remaining time at dinner I learned bits and pieces of my new comrades' pasts. Most of them had a relative or someone else turn them in for insanity, but others were more interesting. Demyx had attempted to shoot himself in the heart, but the bullet had hit his breastbone instead. Vexen attempted to poison himself but his neighbor discovered him before it could have its full effect. Xigbar had jumped off a cliff, resulting in his scar and eye patch. Saix had an interesting scar across his face that he said he could tell me about later. I admired Axel's story of running away and hopping on a plane to Guadalajara. His father unfortunately found his ticket information on the computer and the authorities were waiting for him when he landed. My favorite though, was Marluxia's of rolling his car off the highway in his attempt of suicide.
"You should come to my room tonight." Axel said. I raised an eyebrow at him, causing him to sigh and continue. "With Demyx and Marluxia. We are going to have an orgy." I choked on the water that was halfway down my throat. Axel laughed at my reaction. "I'm kidding you. We always hang out since we are the youngest in this group."
"But how? Don't they have security cameras or something?" Why wouldn't they in a place like this? I felt my face burn as snickers spread like wildfire across the table. Quickly I ducked my head so more strands of hair would fall across my face and hide it.
"It's easy. Just tell the night time checker that you are going to the bathroom to brush your teeth or something. They will leave your door unlocked for you and they don't ever check back in our ward." Demyx chimed in, cutting everything on his plate into neat little squares.
"Fine." It sounded easy enough, but I couldn't help the doubt that had crept into my stomach and voice. After all, I was being told this by two boys of whom I had known barely an hour.
"See you at ten." Axel said, sliding his chair aback as people in crisp uniforms started to come forward and gather certain charges. Luxord walked passed me, yanking on the collar of my shirt to summon me to follow him. He led my through the labyrinth of tables to the dreadful woman who shoved me down here earlier, still wearing her bright yellow dress that was two sizes too small. I couldn't help my nose from wrinkling in distaste at the sight of her.
"I'm already starting to dislike that woman." I muttered under my breath, more to myself than to the blonde next to me.
"I wish I could tell you that you get used to her, but you don't." Luxord answered me in his British accent as we got into a line by room numbers. Luxord was in room 361E so he was farther up than me in the line. Our land of yellow's room numbers were random from 340 to 399. Why I had no idea. It just added another thing to my list of weird and stupid things in my place of imprisonment.
Thankfully the two people either behind me or in front of me were relatively quiet, except for the woman in front of me kept muttering to her hand and the other behind me was not much older than me, growling at the middle aged man behind her.
Much to my enjoyment miss perky had her hands full with eleven other charges. I followed in our little line, staring absentmindedly off into space, wishing that Ienzo would return soon to save me from my lonely and confused mind.
As soon as I got to my room I flopped down on my bed, without bothering to flick the lights on, so the darkness would shroud the nauseas yellow. Even with the lights off the brightness of the yellow still shone a bit. Groaning I rolled over, smashing my face in the comforter, closing my eyes. I lay there long enough that the exhaustion of the day started to grab a hold of me. I was having trouble thinking, trains of thought dying out as quickly as they had come, my brain starting to close down.
Soon I was drifting in somewhere I couldn't quite recognize. No, I did recognize it. It was my living room, but everything seemed to be covered in a clean sheet of white mist and also seemed untouchable. It was my living room, right down to the placing of photo frames. But the deeper into the room I waded the stranger and unrecognizable the room became. My elderly relatives looked younger and prettier in their pictures. The hot chocolate stain my cousin had created all those years ago that my mother had hid under furniture was missing. The usually small clutter of coffee mugs and magazine on the coffee table was gone. The carpet was brighter, the curtain much silkier and flowing than I remembered. I stood in the middle of the room, drinking in this room of utter perfection. Far off, someone called my name as the pretty room started to shift. Photo frames cracked and fell off the wall as the room seemingly tilted sharply. Ugly blotches appeared on the once spotless couch. Who was calling me? The shining white carpet started to grow a red stain the color of blood that quickly seeped across the carpet, making its way towards me. The coffee table broke in two as the curtains gained rips and tears. Someone called to me again, closer this time, but by then the stain had reached me and I was falling into dark abyss, large splinters of wood attacking me from all angles as the floor broke apart. I struggle to find something to grasp on to but still I was falling…falling…
"Zexion!" The nurse yelled a final time, giving my shoulders a shake. I jumped violently, shaking of the last vestiges of the dream. The nurse standing over me was a younger one with springy brown hair I was yet to me. Her small gold plaque on her dress read "Elaine"
"Are you going to go to the rest room or anything before you go to bed?" Her voice was timid sounding, but she didn't back off an inch from me. She was wearing the same yellow dress as the batty nurse, but hers fit her. I glanced around her to look at my clock. 9:45.
"Yea. Yea I want to brush my teeth" I muttered, pushing off the bed and moving around her to retrieve my toothbrush from where I had placed it on my desk. Elaine stared at me for a moment before walking out the door in front of me to lead me to the closest bathrooms. There was a long line of sinks alternating yellow and white to match the theme colors of the two halls that shared this bathroom. Elaine left me after I assured her I could find my way back on my own.
I ran the brush over my teeth, studying my disheveled figure in the mirror. My hair was going in several directions, and the pupils of my eyes were huge. My skin was paler than normal and dark circles were starting to form underneath my eyes. Hurriedly I spat the white foam out of my mouth, shoving the tooth brush into one of the soft sweatpants' deep pockets. I sprinted silently down the hallway towards a back staircase that Axel had told me the location of. His hall, Strawberry Fields was on the floor above mine, on floor D.
I slowed when I had almost reached his hall. The floor was set up exactly as mine below it, so I knew where his room must be. I repeated the room number silently in my head over and over again as I passed the Meadows of Green hallway. I could hear someone yelling in the nearest room. After listening a minute I realized that it was Saix, though I couldn't understand what he was saying. He paused once as if listening to someone before falling right back into his tirade.
I hurried off before a worker came down the hallway to find out what all the yelling was and discover me gawking in the hallway. The yelling muffled out completely as I rounded a corner and found myself surrounded by deep red. Three doors down I found it. 716D. I glanced around behind me nervously before knocking. My hand had barely made a sound before the door was flung open and strong hands yanked me in, the door shoved shut behind me.
"Didn't think you were going to show Zex." Axel was standing in front of me, observing me with a half smile on his face. The minute I started to take in my surrounding I felt a surge of jealousy. The red almost was the same as his hair, just like he said only one or two shades darker. The walls had wood on them on the bottom half just like mine, only his were made out of dark mahogany, matching all his furniture, again just like mine. Besides the color scheme everything I remembered to mine, the two shelves, bed in corner, desk, etc.
"What's so amazing?" He inquired as I took in all the clutter on his shelves. Books were stacked closely together and on top of one another. There was a cup filled with pencils resting on top of a small stack of notebooks. A wall clock was resting on the top shelf, ticking away cheerfully. His walls were covered in posters and various pictures, all stuck in place with tape.
Axel was still staring at my strangely so I said the first thing that came to mind. "Why don't' you hang your clock on the wall?" I asked, gesturing towards the clock on the shelf, noticing this time that it was in Japanese.
"Oh. We aren't allowed to have wall tacks or anything like that." He motioned to everything plastered down with tape to prove his point. "They are really tight asses about everything and what you can and can't have." I followed after him deeper into the room. Marluxia and Demyx were perched on his bed, Demyx looking out and something beyond the window.
"So how did you get all of this stuff?" I wandered over to his shelves, running my index finger over the spines of a few of the books.
"Mostly my family brings them to me when I ask them to or just randomly sometimes." Axel dismissed the question with a final wave of his hand. "They have to approve everything first. It's stupid. I mean, if my father brings me a poster or something I asked him to, the have to inspect it and make sure he's not smuggling me something. What would my own dad be smuggling me anyway? Meth? In a giant glossy piece of paper no less?" I stared at him in slight amazement as he continued to rant, his voice surprisingly clear and easily understandable and the speed his tirade was spewing forth out of his mouth. Marluxia was some how managing to take in Axel's rant while studying a lock of his rosy hair with a slight look of distaste on his face. My eyes swept over Demyx, lingering on the blonde. He was watching all of Axel's large hand gestures with surprising interest, nodding enthusiastically every now and then, beautiful aqua eyes filled with bright emotions.
What wait? Beautiful aqua eyes? Where did that come from? I had barely known the guy for three or four hours, and on top of that we were complete opposites, and I was almost positive that I was straight.
"I mean come on, Marluxia can't even get a pack of seeds without them going into lock down. Stupid bastards." Axel sighed loudly and flopped down on his back on the fluffy red comforter. "I miss the days of my freedom…and hot pockets." Axel's statement earned an adorable giggle from Demyx. Adorable? I shook my head, attempting to rid myself of the thought.
"Ooh me too! I love those chicken cheese tortilla ones." Demyx replied, idly swinging his legs back and forth. "I miss Reese's peanut butter cups too. Those things were the best." He turned to look at Marluxia sitting beside him. "What about you Marxie?"
Marluxia winced slightly at the butchering of his name, but let it go. He didn't reply right away as if he was thinking about it. "Klondike bars." He concluded, a shadow of a smiled ghosting across his face as if they were a long lost memory suddenly revived. Demyx and Axel nodded their agreement.
"What about you Zex?" Miss anything yet?" Demyx turned those eyes to me, smiling softly. Usually I would have replied to such a question with no hesitation, but I found myself unable to reply, eyes held steady by his pretty aqua ones. I cast my eyes downward, scrabbling to figure out the right thing to say. Freedom, a food, a person? I could feel the heat of all three of their gazes upon me. For some reason, I didn't want to sound stupid and wanted them to accept my opinion, which was a new feeling for me.
Marluxia thankfully saved me, as if he had sensed my predicament. "Don't worry, you will start to miss things in time." He said, breaking the heavy silence and lifting my burden. Demyx and Axel went on to start a new topic, but instead of trying to follow what they were saying I looked up at Marluxia instead. He gave me what I took as a half-smile. I moved to sit next to him on the last vacant spot on the bed.
Marluxia returned to studying his hair lock by lock, as we sat in an agreeable silence, listening to Axel and Demyx. I took the opportunity to study Marluxia at a closer up view, seeing this was the closest I had ever been to him. My eyes wandered up to the roots of his hair, trying to figure out he had for some reason dyed it that color. But there was no sign of a different shade of hair hiding underneath. He was thin and lanky, but not quite as lanky as Axel. The way he held himself gave off an air of complications and intelligence and a hint….ego? I couldn't quite place what it was.
"So has Saix made a definite move on you yet?" Axel's voice brought me back out of my own thoughts and into the present. At first I was certain he was talking to Demyx, that is, until Marluxia answered him.
"Oh wouldn't you like to know." Marluxia sounded slightly frigid, with a cool leer across his face.
"Why yes I would. Everyone knows that he's dying to get a piece of your ass." Demyx snorted as Axel's comeback.
"And just what makes you think I would actually let him hmm?" Marluxia arched an elegant eyebrow at his red head companion, as if daring him to challenge him again. Axel ran his tongue across his bottom lip hesitating for just a fraction of a second.
"So you admit it. He is all about getting in your pants." Demyx leaned back and eventually scooted out from between the two and crawled across the bed to sit next to me. I felt a slight shiver run up my spine at his sudden closeness.
The sides of Marluxia's mouth quirked up a fraction of an inch. "Have you always fallen to tales of gossip?" Demyx turned away and latched onto Axel's pillow, wrapping his arms around it and falling back onto the bed, cradling the pillow under his head and upper torso. Apparently by his reaction, this kind of exchange of words was a common occurrence between the two. They weren't really arguing, more of challenging each other until one of them ended up submitting.
"Do my own eyes have the ability to gossip to me now? I know how he looks at you all the time. Like a little puppy who has finally found his long lost bone, only to discover it's on the neighbor's side of the fence." Axel sat up a fraction of an inch taller, certain that his quick comeback had won him the battle this time.
Marluxia didn't miss a beat. "At least I could get some if I wanted to." Demyx snorted loudly, rolling over to stifle his laughs in the pillow. I felt a smile of my own creep across my lips.
"Fine, fine you win this time." Axel slouched down again, scowling softly to himself. Marluxia, now triumphant smiled almost in a sinister way. "Now, now Axel don't you worry. Someone will come alone just dying to get in your pants too." Demyx sat up from his spot on the bed, shaking some stray strands of hair back into place.
"Yea, yea some day my prince will come!" Axel burst into horribly off key song, waving his hands around in the air and then clamping them down over his heart, looking wistfully off into the distance. Suddenly it hit me. Were all three of them gay? I hadn't even thought about it until now. Axel had been accusing Marluxia of being sexually active with another man, Saix no less the slightly creepy blue hair. And Axel had just practically shouted to the world that he was gay. Demyx hadn't said anything yet, but I was fairly certain he might be gay too if the other two were. I had nothing against homosexuals, but yet the thought of it stimulated that crawly feeling in my stomach again when I had practically lost myself in Demyx's eyes.
"Hey I have an extra poster and maybe some other stuff in my room you can have if you want." Demyx said suddenly. I turned to look at him, mentally screaming at myself to keep my voice steady and normal.
"That's nice of you Demyx, I appreciate it." My voice was even, not a hint of stuttering anywhere. Demyx's eyes lit up as if I had just offered him something.
"Great! We can go get it now if you…" Axel cut Demyx off, glancing up at the clock on the shelf. "No time Dem, it's getting close to midnight."
"What's so important about midnight?" I furrowed my eyebrows, confused.
"Nothing really we just don't like push our limits." Axel shrugged, studying the frayed edge of the hem of his pants.
"Oh come on Axel it will be ok just this once!" Demyx bounced off the bed, taking my hand. I felt myself freeze slightly at the contact.
"I have a ton of books in my room that I've already read a dozen times that you can have some of." Marluxia added, standing to his feet as well.
'Well don't think you three are just going to up and abandon me! I'm coming too." He beat us all to the door, wrenching it open and tiptoeing into the hallway once he was sure no one was in it.
"Come on." He led the way to the back staircase I had used earlier, mounting the stairs to the next floor up, floor B. Once again it was set up just like the other two floors, only the two hallways of our ward sporting different colors. Demyx passed the Orange Blossoms hallway without a second glance and head for the dark blue hallway. It had a slight grey tint to it, almost just like the ocean. He headed all the way to the last door in the hall, opening it with an almost grand flourish in his movements. The dark blue of the room mixed with the darkness of night outside made the room almost a little bit gloomier than it should have been. The pile of things on his shelves was almost similar to Axel's, pencils, books stacked in various styles, little odds and ends. But Demyx had something on his shelves that Axel had not. Music books. Upon closer inspection I realized they were almost all for playing the guitar, acoustic and electric. One or two of them were on drums.
"I don't know how well you like them or not, but it can at least get rid of some of the yellow." Demyx was shuffling around his desk, before producing a glossy poster, held in a cylinder by a rubber band. I slid the rubber band off and opened it. The Rasmus. Not bad. I rolled it back up and replaced the rubber band.
"Thank you Demyx." Demyx smiled proudly. "You're welcome Zexion." His room was more of a mess than Axel's had been. The bed was unmade and various shirts and other items of clothing were strewn around the room. One of the music books was open on the middle of the floor.
"Ok let's go." Axel latched onto my arm and practically dragged me out of the room.
"What's your sudden hurry?" Demyx complained trudging out of his room behind us.
Axel didn't bother to answer him.
We mounted the stairs to the top floor, A. The top floor seemed smaller than the others for an unknown reason. It also seemed quieter and a little more peaceful.
The indigo of Marluxia's hallway didn't do my eyes any justice, but it was better than the dreaded yellow I was going to have to face again soon. Every door was silent, unlike the other halls were you could occasionally hear someone muttering or yelling. Marluxia's door was right in the middle of the hallway, right next to the shiny little plaque that read Indigo Waves.
But what was even more surprising than the unusual silence of the floor was what covered Marluxia's room.
Plants and flowers of all shapes and sizes covered almost every available space from the window sill to the ends of the shelves to even just sitting on the floor. Vines crawled out of their pots to hang down over the sides of the shelves. Several Venus fly traps were perched on a corner of the desk. A basket of daffodils was on the night stand. A plant that looked unpleasantly like poison oak was on top of the dresser. But the most eye catching however was the array of roses on the windowsill. Red, pink, yellow, white and even blue roses mingled among each other, making the arrangement look scattered but pretty. Axel nudged me in the side, making me reluctantly look away from the roses.
"You can have anything you want on the bottom shelf." Marluxia said. Most of the top shelf held things other than books anyway. Marluxia's shelves were much more organized than the other two's, the books stacked neatly in a horizontal row and in neat little stacks on top when he had ran out of room. My eyes scanned over the titles before I gingerly pulled one called "Running with Scissors" off of the shelf. The book was one of the more worn out ones, which is why it had caught my eye. Often books with more wear and tear meant they were more enjoyable and were well used. I looked at Marluxia gratefully for it, hugging the fragile book to my chest.
"Alright let's go." Axel announced for the second time in the passed ten minutes, ushering us all out the door, save for Marluxia who stayed in his room, studying one of the vines that had almost wound its from the top shelf all the way down to the floor.
We left Demyx at his room on the next floor down, and I left Axel at his on floor C. "Don't be late to breakfast in the morning. They are real tight asses about that too." He told me, leaning against his door frame. "It's at eight thirty."
"Eight thirty. Right." He smirked at me once more before backing up and disappearing into his room. I continued the trek to the floor below now on my own, going over the event of the last couple of hours in my head. My stomach hardened unpleasantly at the remembrance of my thoughts of Demyx, the first words that came to mind when I thought about him. Free spirited, adorable...loveable. I swallowed hard as I reached my door, pushing it open and stepping inside without bothering to turn on the light, for fear it would make the yellow even more unbearable. I didn't even want to think about how it would be in the morning.
Groping my way through the blessed darkness, I placed the book down on the shelf next to the four my mother had brought me, and set the poster in the corner next to the desk. My hand slid across the desk, picking up the digital clock and pushing the button to illuminate the time. 12:04. Quickly I set a wake up alarm on it to wake me up in eight hours. I crashed down onto the bed, not even bothering to change since what I was wearing was practically sleeping attire anyway. I laid awake for awhile longer, willing Ienzo in my head to appear in the darkness of the room. He hadn't specified exactly when he would be back, and it was slightly aggravating.
The first vestiges of sleep however soon grabbed a hold of me, pulling me into a deep sleep. Thankfully this time, I didn't dream.
"Good morning sunshine!" Xigbar chirped at Xaldin, mostly for the sport of just being an ass. Xaldin grumbled something incoherent, more to himself than anyone else as he sank down into his usual place.
"Something wrong?" Xemnas inquired, gazing over at his companion with mild interest.
"Not really. Dilan kept me awake all night, rambling on and on about who knows what." He flicked a dreadlock away from his face. "Lousy son of a bitch."
I had been at the psycho home for exactly three days, and I already had learned a lot about my new companions. Marluxia, given his exterior, was not anything like he seemed. He wasn't quiet like you would expect him to be, and managed to keep himself properly clean and tidy without being too feminine about it. He could also fix you with a glare so cold that he could shut any one up within seconds. Xigbar often was an ass just for the sake of being an ass. Vexen usually was at the end of his rope, his voice getting shriller the more being annoyed him. Saix truly wasn't as creepy as he seemed, but at times for unknown reasons it seemed like he could beat you to a pulp and not even give it a second thought. I also noticed what Axel and declared, of his little glances and Marluxia. They happened a dozen or so times a meal, making it obvious to more than just me and Axel. Lexaeus was often quiet and seemed to be brooding, but when he started talking a lot you better listen, because usually it was something crucial.
No one in our little group was stupid though. They were all on the intelligent side, even Demyx who always seemed to be bubbly and happy about everything. I was yet to see him in a foul mood. Most breakfasts went the same, often with one or two incidents of petty fighting breaking out, just because none of us were morning people. This morning, however, was different.
"We are not yet a full, complete group yet." Xemnas spoke up, his voice loud enough to reach the end of the table. "However we are close to becoming a true…organization so to speak. I already know what your numbers and rankings are to be, however I assure you just because you are a lower number it doesn't mean you are a lower member. I have my own specific reason for giving you that number. I also have almost completed making all of your titles." No one questioned him. As I had learned, Xemnas talked a lot about the "organization" we were coming to become, and how it was very soon.
"So what makes us a complete organization then?" Luxord spoke up, his British accent floating across the table.
Xemnas held up two fingers. "Two more members, then we will be complete. However, I feel we should be given our proper titles and rankings now. It will be more fitting to begin today as 'Organization Eleven.'"
"Wait I thought you just said we needed two more members, and there is already eleven of us now." Axel quirked an eyebrow, chewing noisily on a bite of cereal.
"I did. We are destined to be Organization Thirteen, but we can not properly call ourselves that right now." Xemnas' eyes glinted with something unrecognizable for a brief second before he continued by telling us our position and title. He made his way around the table, starting with Xigbar and going down the line. Thus I became Number Six, The Cloaked Schemer. Xemnas explained that the title simply meant that I was highly intelligent, and could manipulate people and events to my liking if I wanted to. Marluxia was none to happy about being placed at number eleven in a group of eleven, which resulted in Xemnas spending most of breakfast explaining to him that he had his reasons for the position and that it did not mean he was lowlier that everyone else. His title, however, did him justice. The Graceful Assassin. The slightly sinister trademark smile of his graced his lips at the announcement of his title.
I gazed down at my foam cereal bowl, contemplating what Xemnas had said. He had not ordered us as I had expected, by the time of our arrivals. If he had done that I would have been number eleven, and Saix would have been number two and so on. But the idea that we had an official title now was…intriguing. It almost gave us a sense of purpose, whatever that was going to end up being. I repeated my new title and ranking over and over again in my head.
Zexion, Number Six, the Cloaked Schemer.
So...yay? Nay? My heart was literally pounding so hard from excitement and nervousness of finally putting this up for the world to see. I wish for your feedback!! It makes my heart glow :-)