Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note or any characters affiliated therewith.
Note: My first shot at humor. I can't write humor to save my life. Do not kill me. Please.
Once a year, Watari forced L to go through a physical at the local hospital near the building where the investigation was centered. This time, due to the fact they were chained together and L wouldn't remove the handcuff, Light was dragged along. Currently, the teen was looking daggers at the messy-haired detective who was clinging to a chair in the nurse's clinic.
"Just take off your shirt, Ryuuzaki," the brunette growled at him. L shook his head, eyeing the boy nervously.
"I can assure you it is quite unnecessary, Yagami-kun. I am not getting a shot, and that's that." The childish detective stole a glance at the nurse behind the counter, who was waiting patiently. Light muttered an apology to her.
"He… has needle phobia…" He fished for an excuse.
"How very perceptive, Light-kun," L said, eyes narrowed. "Perhaps you have other things to tell me then? Some things pertaining to the projectwe are currently working on?" Light's left eye twitched ever so slightly.
"Always fishing for evidence, that little-"
"Young man?" A young, pretty nurse holding a clipboard opened the door to the back room. "Ryuuzaki Ryusaki¹?" she wrinkled her nose slightly at the pronunciation, before smiling at the detective. "It's your turn."
As Light suspected, L tried to make a mad dash for the door to the parking lot. The brunette roughly yanked him back by the chain, catching him by an arm and a leg and half-dragged him through the door, much to the amusement and pity of the nurses there.
"This way, please," the woman said, giggling behind her hand. Light practically threw L down into the green chair beside the nurse, who patted his knee comfortingly as he drew up his legs.
"Don't worry. All my patients tell me they don't feel a thing."
"That is because they are so overcome with fear, they can't think of anything else. But after the initial deed is done, and they are on their way out of this clinic, only then do they think that it hurts," the detective said quickly, his eyes darting around everywhere. The nurse slipped on a pair of latex gloves and inspected the small vial of vaccination fluid on the plastic tray beside her.
"Which arm do you write with, Ryusaki-san?" she asked, uncapping a syringe and filling it with the vaccination fluid.
"The right," Light said from behind the detective. He rolled up L's left sleeve, much to the dismay of the raven-haired man.
"Okay. Now, if you would please not move…" L's eyes were ready to pop out of his head as he watched the syringe draw closer and closer to his skin. Suddenly, he lost all cool, calm composure, and started screaming, deafening anyone within a ten-foot radius.
"NO! DON'T DO IT! DON'T DO IT! DON'T DO… It…?" L looked questioningly at the nurse, who was gently patting a band-aid into place. She smiled sweetly at him.
"There now. That wasn't so bad, was it?" Light breathed a sigh of relief, rubbing his ears as he looked at his companion. The detective seemed pensive for a moment, before placing a finger at his lips.
"No, I suppose it wasn't. Now, where's the candy?"
A/N: Hope it was amusing if not hilarious. Anyway, school's been a pain. I have been busy with an overload of schoolwork. But I haven't forgotten my readers! Also, Ryusaki is an actual surname for a Japanese person. I looked it up.