To Grow a Pair

by LeFay Strent

There comes a time in every man's life when he must simply grow a pair. For Roy, this turns out harder to do than he thought possible. CRACK

"HUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGHHH!"

"Roy? What the hell are you doing?"

"Shut up, Maes. I'm trying to grow a pair. Haa- HUUUUUUURRRRGHHH!"

"…"

"Wait! Wait...I think I feel something," Roy said after a couple minutes.

Pmmmmmppphhh.

Maes gaped at him in amusement and disgust.

Roy shook his head, "Never mind, it was just gas. Back to growing—HHHHHUUURRRRRGGGGHHH!"

"What's this about?" Riza asked Maes, raising an eyebrow to say that she was definitely not amused.

Maes helplessly watched his friend as he sat in his desk chair straining against some seemingly invisible force. "He's lost his mind."

Riza nodded like she knew this day would come. "I'll call in to have the office quarantined. We can't have his stupidity spreading."

---

I had to...I'm sorry. *cackles away into the sunset*