Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars. George Lucas does, but I wish I owned the
young Obi Wan Kenobi, as do most of us at this point ;).
*NOTE* This is a continuation, although could be a stand alone fic of "Longing..."
Staying in Focus
by Grace in the Heavens
Margeritaisgoodtodrink@hotmail.com
Ten years has gone by and the love Obi Wan held for Padme had grown. He was now a Jedi Master
and highly respected. Anakin had grown to be a man, but still a boy. They were returning to
Coruscant, a new misison to protect Senator Amidala. Obi Wan's heart spread up quickly as
the image of her face flew through his mind. Anakin had been talking the whole time they walked
to her room.
"I hope she remembers me!"...
"But what if she doesn't?!"....
"What if I wasn't that important to her at all?!"...
"And what if she was just being kind?"...
Anakin was now pacing frantically back and forth. Obi Wan sighed and said, "Don't worry, she
cares for you, and she'll remember you" he saw the look on Ani's face knowing he had eased his
worries. But secretly, Obi had felt the same way. What if she doesn't remember me...
The doors opened and the two handsome knights walked in. Padme stood with beauty and
dignity. The years had increased the wisdom in her eyes. Both master and padwan struggled
to keep their composure, reminding themselves to breathe. She first acknowledged Obi Wan,
which sent his heart to Heaven, proclaiming his name.
Then it happened, Padme turned to his younger padwan, they both looked into the other's eyes.
The desire was so evident in Anakin's but in Padme, Obi Wan could not tell. But he knew it wasn't
the same friendly look she had just given him. They had begun to speak and Anikin said in
a lusty tone.
"More beautiful I mean..."
A flash of jealousy washed through him, in his mind he said, "Why didn't I say that?!"
When and how did this boy become so suave?... He was at a loss.
It was later that day, the sun was about to set as Obi Wan walked down the long corridor, shadows
passing along his masked face. Obi Wan didn't know what to do. He loved her, but it could never
be. The unspoken forbidden law taht a Jedi could never love, it led to the dark side. Obi Wan
could believe that. How could people say this feeling was wonderful when he was dying inside?
Each night his dreams were so wonderful, she'd smile and laugh with him. Look at him with
love in her eyes. But then the horrid day would come, and he was alone. He reached her door
in an instant, his stomach burned and the vision of Padme and Anakin together flashed in front
of his eyes. He shoved that behind the back of his mind. Then he opened the door.
Anakin stood their looking out the window. Obi wan searched the room with his eyes, knowing
something wasn't right. "The monitors are down..." Obi stated in an annoyed tone.
Anakin looed up, startled, then smirked. "She insisted on taking them down. I don't think
she wanted me looking in on her as she slept." Well, I wouldn't blame her. You look like you're
going to jump her. But then something was off.
The truth sank in, "She's using herself to be bait." Obi exclaimed angrily. They began to bicker
at eachother, when a nagging feeling from the Force burst into him. Ani felt it too. They both
ran into his beloved's room. The most hideous worm crawling toward her. In an instance Anikin
had jumped right on Padme killing the two creatures. Obi Wan looked at a flying contraption
obviously the thing here to kill Padme. In anger he flung himself right through the glass,
grabbing on to the machine. He flew through the air wanting to know her assassin. He know
then that he could never tell her how he felt. But he didn't know why and that pained him the most.
Time had passed. and now the crowd wailed, but not of praise, but to have their lives ripped
apart. Obi Wan, Anakin, and his beautiful Padme were being tied up to poles in the center of
a ring. He had been trapped for usch a long time, the only thing to sustain him was the memory
of her face. And now, he feared she'd be taken from his sight for good.
So they fought, and together, the Jedi came, although some fell to their death. As the battle
neared the end, he glanced at Padme, bruised and bleeding. But she still looked like a queen,
small yet strong and brave. She looked like she belonged in the circle of remaining Jedi prepared
to fight to her death. He was proud, but wished she was in another place, with beauty and safety
in the air, not this God-forsaken barren desert.
Then he heard them come, their rescuers. They all ran to the ships. Anakin and Padme in front
of him. They chansed the enemy, taking a hit. Padme was thrown from the shuttle craft
landing on her back. Obi's first instinct was to jump out after her and he could see Anakin was
about to do the same thing. Once again, Jedi reason took over, and he had to appear heartless,
speaking only logic. he said to think of what Padme would do, realizing she wouldn't have batted
an eye, if it were him. No, that wasn't true, but in his heart, it sure felt that way.
It was no good, Obi Wan was about to die. He would die, not knowing if she were alive and safe.
Not seeing her face again, dying without telling her how he felt. The world was cruel and all he
had felt was pain through it and now this was just another blow to his heart.
Obi Wan was going to see her, his heart sang inside him as he drove the airship. He was on an
errand for yoda. To go over political affairs with Senator Amidala. He'd have her for a week.
A whole week to himself. He hadn't seen her since Anakin had taken her back to Naboo. Obi Wan
had wanted to go himself.
Obi Wan's spaceship was now docking. He had his traditional Jedi uniform, but knew he would
look different. Padme stood with her attendants, her head high and dainty. She was breathtaking,
her hair was loose, flowing down over her shoulder. She was wearing a midnight blue dress, that
hung off the shoulder with gold embrodery on it. As he walked into sight, with his hood still
covering his head and face.
He stood in front of her, slowly he pulled down his hood. As she gazed at him, he could tell she
was surprised and delighted. Obi Wan's beard was gone, and his hair was cut short. He
looked as young as he did when they had first met.
Padme rushed over and embraced Obi Wan, proclaiming, "I'm so happy to see you again."
He gently hugged her back saying, "So am I!" Then together they walked back to the palace.
They sat across from each other, reading papers. Finally, Padme broke the silence.
"I think we've done enough for today," pausing, "So, let's talk."
Obi Wan looked up mildly surprised. He was very happy she wanted to talk to him. He cleared
his throat and said, "All right."
Padme jumped up and said, "But not here...let's go...let's you and I have a picnic!
Yes... let's do that! Can we?" Her voice was so happy. She now was just a girl, not
a senator, anhd his heart warmed to that. He realized he hadn't said anything, when she
looked away. Slightly ashamed, saying, "We don't have to if you don't want to..." Her eyes looked
so sad. Obi Wan jumped to her, rectifying the situation.
"Of course I would want to go. Nothing would bring me greater joy!" With that, she smiled again
and grabbed his arm, pulling him with her. While she was saying all the things they would need,
Obi Wan wondered what would come of this. He had to hope for the best and that was it.
They both laughed and talked all afternoon. And as they sat in the sun, a serious silence fell into
the air. Padme looked at Obi Wan in the eyes, fear dancing in her own. She took this opportunity
to speak. "Obi Wan, why is it forbidden for Jedi Knights to love?" pausing then, "what would the
outcome be?"
He tooka moment to form his words. Fear and hope rose in his throat, maybe this was it.
From then on, he would be able to speak his love. Obi Wan looked back into her eyes as
she took his hand. "I really don't know, it's not exactly forbidden, but has never happened before."
Until now, he added silently.
She began to talk, "We have been friends for many years, and I value your friendship, more than
anything else."
Obi Wan this is it. He replied, "I value you too Padme...I...." Padme put her hand up in protest
saying in a gentle voice, "please let me finish." He nodded. "But I've lied to you for so long
too." Her voice, ashamed. "You see, I've fallen in love with..." Obi Wan was jumping for joy inside,
he leaned in and then she said in a whisper, "Anakin...."
His heart broke into millions of pieces. He couldn't move, speak, or breathe.
"I know we shouldn't, we really tried. But we got married three months ago." Then she smiled,
she was happy! Happy to be with Anakin, not him. They were married. Obi Wan felt himself
die inside. Anger washed over him. He wanted to be as far away from her as possible. Then
Padme touched his shoulder.
Fear was on her face as she whispered, "Are you angry?" she was so small. He couldn't do it.
He could never hurt his beloved. Obi Wan smiled and pulled her into a hug, "I'm happy you're
happy." He whispered into her hair.
That night Obi Wan cried for the first time since his Master and Father had died. He would
forever be in love with her. And for that he would always be alone.
Three years later....
Obi Wan ran as fast as he could. He had to find her, make her safe.
"Padme!" he yelled as he ran into her bedroom. Searching with his eyes frantically,
he saw her huddled in the corner crying. Obi Wan ran to her in one movement, he was on
his knees, pulling Padme into his arms. They clung to each other desparately. Finally,
he broke the silence.
"Your children are safe, but now you have to leave." She nodded, still pressed up against
him. They rose together and finally broke apart. She dried her eyes, then they both quickly
walked out of her room. As they went, Obi Wan thought of all the time they had spent together.
All because they had lost Anakin. Together they pulled each other along. Being the other
one's shoulder to cry on. And she, his best friend. They fought hand in hand, most people thought
they were having an affair, but it wasn't true. His heart longed for her each minute of everyday.
He stood outside her bedroom wanting her, but ner leaving his post. He was a guard after all.
They reached the landing, where her ship was waiting for her. They gently embraced.
"I will watch over your children, and will be visiting soon." They looked into each other's eyes
and he said, "I'll, I, I'll miss you." She nodded, turned and walked toward her ship.
He lost his chance. He could have told her, but he was too afraid to. Now she was leaving him,
forever. But he had lost all his courage, as he turned, she called out to him.
"Obi Wan, I'm in love with you too!" Their eyes met and they smiled at each other, from that point
on, no matter what, they would not be alone.
young Obi Wan Kenobi, as do most of us at this point ;).
*NOTE* This is a continuation, although could be a stand alone fic of "Longing..."
Staying in Focus
by Grace in the Heavens
Margeritaisgoodtodrink@hotmail.com
Ten years has gone by and the love Obi Wan held for Padme had grown. He was now a Jedi Master
and highly respected. Anakin had grown to be a man, but still a boy. They were returning to
Coruscant, a new misison to protect Senator Amidala. Obi Wan's heart spread up quickly as
the image of her face flew through his mind. Anakin had been talking the whole time they walked
to her room.
"I hope she remembers me!"...
"But what if she doesn't?!"....
"What if I wasn't that important to her at all?!"...
"And what if she was just being kind?"...
Anakin was now pacing frantically back and forth. Obi Wan sighed and said, "Don't worry, she
cares for you, and she'll remember you" he saw the look on Ani's face knowing he had eased his
worries. But secretly, Obi had felt the same way. What if she doesn't remember me...
The doors opened and the two handsome knights walked in. Padme stood with beauty and
dignity. The years had increased the wisdom in her eyes. Both master and padwan struggled
to keep their composure, reminding themselves to breathe. She first acknowledged Obi Wan,
which sent his heart to Heaven, proclaiming his name.
Then it happened, Padme turned to his younger padwan, they both looked into the other's eyes.
The desire was so evident in Anakin's but in Padme, Obi Wan could not tell. But he knew it wasn't
the same friendly look she had just given him. They had begun to speak and Anikin said in
a lusty tone.
"More beautiful I mean..."
A flash of jealousy washed through him, in his mind he said, "Why didn't I say that?!"
When and how did this boy become so suave?... He was at a loss.
It was later that day, the sun was about to set as Obi Wan walked down the long corridor, shadows
passing along his masked face. Obi Wan didn't know what to do. He loved her, but it could never
be. The unspoken forbidden law taht a Jedi could never love, it led to the dark side. Obi Wan
could believe that. How could people say this feeling was wonderful when he was dying inside?
Each night his dreams were so wonderful, she'd smile and laugh with him. Look at him with
love in her eyes. But then the horrid day would come, and he was alone. He reached her door
in an instant, his stomach burned and the vision of Padme and Anakin together flashed in front
of his eyes. He shoved that behind the back of his mind. Then he opened the door.
Anakin stood their looking out the window. Obi wan searched the room with his eyes, knowing
something wasn't right. "The monitors are down..." Obi stated in an annoyed tone.
Anakin looed up, startled, then smirked. "She insisted on taking them down. I don't think
she wanted me looking in on her as she slept." Well, I wouldn't blame her. You look like you're
going to jump her. But then something was off.
The truth sank in, "She's using herself to be bait." Obi exclaimed angrily. They began to bicker
at eachother, when a nagging feeling from the Force burst into him. Ani felt it too. They both
ran into his beloved's room. The most hideous worm crawling toward her. In an instance Anikin
had jumped right on Padme killing the two creatures. Obi Wan looked at a flying contraption
obviously the thing here to kill Padme. In anger he flung himself right through the glass,
grabbing on to the machine. He flew through the air wanting to know her assassin. He know
then that he could never tell her how he felt. But he didn't know why and that pained him the most.
Time had passed. and now the crowd wailed, but not of praise, but to have their lives ripped
apart. Obi Wan, Anakin, and his beautiful Padme were being tied up to poles in the center of
a ring. He had been trapped for usch a long time, the only thing to sustain him was the memory
of her face. And now, he feared she'd be taken from his sight for good.
So they fought, and together, the Jedi came, although some fell to their death. As the battle
neared the end, he glanced at Padme, bruised and bleeding. But she still looked like a queen,
small yet strong and brave. She looked like she belonged in the circle of remaining Jedi prepared
to fight to her death. He was proud, but wished she was in another place, with beauty and safety
in the air, not this God-forsaken barren desert.
Then he heard them come, their rescuers. They all ran to the ships. Anakin and Padme in front
of him. They chansed the enemy, taking a hit. Padme was thrown from the shuttle craft
landing on her back. Obi's first instinct was to jump out after her and he could see Anakin was
about to do the same thing. Once again, Jedi reason took over, and he had to appear heartless,
speaking only logic. he said to think of what Padme would do, realizing she wouldn't have batted
an eye, if it were him. No, that wasn't true, but in his heart, it sure felt that way.
It was no good, Obi Wan was about to die. He would die, not knowing if she were alive and safe.
Not seeing her face again, dying without telling her how he felt. The world was cruel and all he
had felt was pain through it and now this was just another blow to his heart.
Obi Wan was going to see her, his heart sang inside him as he drove the airship. He was on an
errand for yoda. To go over political affairs with Senator Amidala. He'd have her for a week.
A whole week to himself. He hadn't seen her since Anakin had taken her back to Naboo. Obi Wan
had wanted to go himself.
Obi Wan's spaceship was now docking. He had his traditional Jedi uniform, but knew he would
look different. Padme stood with her attendants, her head high and dainty. She was breathtaking,
her hair was loose, flowing down over her shoulder. She was wearing a midnight blue dress, that
hung off the shoulder with gold embrodery on it. As he walked into sight, with his hood still
covering his head and face.
He stood in front of her, slowly he pulled down his hood. As she gazed at him, he could tell she
was surprised and delighted. Obi Wan's beard was gone, and his hair was cut short. He
looked as young as he did when they had first met.
Padme rushed over and embraced Obi Wan, proclaiming, "I'm so happy to see you again."
He gently hugged her back saying, "So am I!" Then together they walked back to the palace.
They sat across from each other, reading papers. Finally, Padme broke the silence.
"I think we've done enough for today," pausing, "So, let's talk."
Obi Wan looked up mildly surprised. He was very happy she wanted to talk to him. He cleared
his throat and said, "All right."
Padme jumped up and said, "But not here...let's go...let's you and I have a picnic!
Yes... let's do that! Can we?" Her voice was so happy. She now was just a girl, not
a senator, anhd his heart warmed to that. He realized he hadn't said anything, when she
looked away. Slightly ashamed, saying, "We don't have to if you don't want to..." Her eyes looked
so sad. Obi Wan jumped to her, rectifying the situation.
"Of course I would want to go. Nothing would bring me greater joy!" With that, she smiled again
and grabbed his arm, pulling him with her. While she was saying all the things they would need,
Obi Wan wondered what would come of this. He had to hope for the best and that was it.
They both laughed and talked all afternoon. And as they sat in the sun, a serious silence fell into
the air. Padme looked at Obi Wan in the eyes, fear dancing in her own. She took this opportunity
to speak. "Obi Wan, why is it forbidden for Jedi Knights to love?" pausing then, "what would the
outcome be?"
He tooka moment to form his words. Fear and hope rose in his throat, maybe this was it.
From then on, he would be able to speak his love. Obi Wan looked back into her eyes as
she took his hand. "I really don't know, it's not exactly forbidden, but has never happened before."
Until now, he added silently.
She began to talk, "We have been friends for many years, and I value your friendship, more than
anything else."
Obi Wan this is it. He replied, "I value you too Padme...I...." Padme put her hand up in protest
saying in a gentle voice, "please let me finish." He nodded. "But I've lied to you for so long
too." Her voice, ashamed. "You see, I've fallen in love with..." Obi Wan was jumping for joy inside,
he leaned in and then she said in a whisper, "Anakin...."
His heart broke into millions of pieces. He couldn't move, speak, or breathe.
"I know we shouldn't, we really tried. But we got married three months ago." Then she smiled,
she was happy! Happy to be with Anakin, not him. They were married. Obi Wan felt himself
die inside. Anger washed over him. He wanted to be as far away from her as possible. Then
Padme touched his shoulder.
Fear was on her face as she whispered, "Are you angry?" she was so small. He couldn't do it.
He could never hurt his beloved. Obi Wan smiled and pulled her into a hug, "I'm happy you're
happy." He whispered into her hair.
That night Obi Wan cried for the first time since his Master and Father had died. He would
forever be in love with her. And for that he would always be alone.
Three years later....
Obi Wan ran as fast as he could. He had to find her, make her safe.
"Padme!" he yelled as he ran into her bedroom. Searching with his eyes frantically,
he saw her huddled in the corner crying. Obi Wan ran to her in one movement, he was on
his knees, pulling Padme into his arms. They clung to each other desparately. Finally,
he broke the silence.
"Your children are safe, but now you have to leave." She nodded, still pressed up against
him. They rose together and finally broke apart. She dried her eyes, then they both quickly
walked out of her room. As they went, Obi Wan thought of all the time they had spent together.
All because they had lost Anakin. Together they pulled each other along. Being the other
one's shoulder to cry on. And she, his best friend. They fought hand in hand, most people thought
they were having an affair, but it wasn't true. His heart longed for her each minute of everyday.
He stood outside her bedroom wanting her, but ner leaving his post. He was a guard after all.
They reached the landing, where her ship was waiting for her. They gently embraced.
"I will watch over your children, and will be visiting soon." They looked into each other's eyes
and he said, "I'll, I, I'll miss you." She nodded, turned and walked toward her ship.
He lost his chance. He could have told her, but he was too afraid to. Now she was leaving him,
forever. But he had lost all his courage, as he turned, she called out to him.
"Obi Wan, I'm in love with you too!" Their eyes met and they smiled at each other, from that point
on, no matter what, they would not be alone.