Disclamier: I OWN NOTHING! Thanks to George Lucas and Mr. Zahn for the wonderful Characters they have created. I do not own the song by Ace of Base either. I am not making any money on this and it is strictly for fun and enjoyment. This is my first fic and I decided to do a song fic to get past some of my writters block. I have a few stories on paper that haven't made it far. So I hope you enjoy. All reviews are welcomed. I hope I didn't damage any of the Characters, but I kept them to what I felt they closely resembled from the inside out. Thank you to all that read!
Song fic for Mara and Luke with a little bit of Callista.
ACE OF BASE "DON'T TURN AROUND."
(Spoken) I will survive without you...
Don't tell me that you wanna leave...
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
Luke Skywalker and Mara Jade were at their best tonight with arguments. She didn't approve of
Callista, but who was she to judge. Just as she thought that she might take leave from Karrde's
mission list to for fill her destiny as a Jedi Knight, Callista walks back into Luke's life. Mara
hated that woman for all she stands for. She left Luke high and dry once and she had to pick up
the pieces when she left. Mara Jade discovered during that time that she started to have feelings
for the damn Farmboy. She truly wished she could take it back. It was most unlike her to give
her heart out to someone who she trusted since the Emperor died. Now she was watching as the light
of her life walked out on her again. He still wanted to be friends with her. He didn't know that
Mara Jade, ex Emperors Hand had deeper feelings and she was going to let him go so he could be
happy. Everyone deserved happiness, except for her. It was the right thing to do. She would refuse
herself a life if it meant making the Jedi's life happier. She knew this time though, that if he left,
she may never see him again. Well if it made him happy, she would give it to him. She would die
for him. She was strong. She could live a life alone right?
If you wanna leave
I won't beg you to stay
And if you gotta go, darling
Maybe it's better that way
I'm gonna be strong
I'm gonna do fine
Don't worry about this heart of mine
(Spoken) Walk out that door
See if I care
Go on and go, but
Don't turn around
'Cause you're gonna see my heart breaking
Don't turn around
I don't want you seeing me cry
Just walk away
It's tearing me apart that you're leaving
I'm letting you go
But I won't let you know...
I won't let you know.
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
"Skywalker, I don't care about your personal affairs. As long as your happy then that is fine
with me!" Mara spat at him.
"Mara don't be this way. Your opinion means a lot to me. What did I do wrong this time?" Luke asked
her. She was always on edge. All he wanted was a little guidance from his best friend. Was that to
much to ask? It's not like she cares anyway what I do other than pulling each other out from certain
death. They were best friends. Or at least he viewed it that way. Why was she acting like this?
He couldn't figure her out even if the Force gave him a walkthrough guide to this woman. She truly
was unique.
"Then go and be happy. You deserve this. You didn't do anything Luke. take what life has given
you. Plus I have a lot of work coming up for Karrde soon as it is. I don't want to fight with you."
Mara stated to Luke. Her eyes felt as if they were going to well up to the size of a huge star destroyer.
Force, what was he doing to her? If she didn't end things here with him she might actually spill her guts
about her feelings and ruin everything between them. Yes it was better left unsaid and this was the best
way out for Luke and his happiness.
"Will you come by Yavin soon so we can train?" He asked with a soft tone.
"You know me Farmboy. I can't say when I will. Maybe one day. I'm not ready for that damn Jedi
code of yours." She returned.
"I guess that is the best I can get."
"You know it is."
"Well I guess this is good bye then."
"Never goodbye Skywalker. I have a feeling our paths will cross again with you in a bacta tank
at the end."
"Don't say that Jade. That sounds horrible."
"Truth hurts doesn't it?"
"How long till we see each other again?" Luke asked with hope shinning in his eyes.
Mara looked straight ahead and pondered when. It was best not to interfere with his happiness.
Maybe she could give him a half cocked answer that would be the best. It was a cop out, but she
knew that his life lay in another direction. She hated her heart. It was a stupid thing to feel
anything. She gave him the only answer she could at that time...
"Ohh I'm sure it won't be long. Given that you always find trouble and need someone to pull you
out of harm's way."
"I hope it's sooner than that. It was great to see you Mara. I must get going. Long flight back
to Yavin in all."
"Yeah, go ahead and go. Don't worry too much Skywalker. I swear that huge ego of yours is bound
to fall on your head and give you a concussion any day!" She said with a steady voice even though
her insides of her heart were breaking. She had to let him go. He needed happiness.
"See you later Mara." He said and hugged her goodbye. Mara stiffened at the contact as it happened
then returned the hug and watched her Jedi make his way to this x-wing for lift off. As the engines
roared to life, Mara put her shields even higher than usual as she watched the sequence for his lift
off. She waved goodbye to her best friend, the one she loved. As soon as his ship started to move
out of the docking bay of Coruscant she felt the traitorous tears form in her eyes. She was letting
Luke go not only from Courasant, but her life as well. She rubbed at the tears that stung her cheeks
and eyes. She knew that he would be happy with that body snatcher.
I won't miss your arms around me
Holding me tight
(Holding me tight)
And if you ever think about me
Just know that I'll be alright
(I'll be alright)
I'm gonna be strong
I'm gonna do fine
Don't worry about this heart of mine
(Spoken) I will survive
I'll make it through
I'll even learn to live without you
Mara reflected on her last encounter with Skywalker. How he smelled when his arms went around
her for an embrace of farewells. No she needed to let go. He wasn't hers. She had to let this
silliness out of her. Emperor's bones! She must not think of Skywalker that way! It is what has
gotten her into this mess she was in now. Sitting inside the Wild Karrde doing work that should
have been completed days ago. That dumb Jedi was always ruining her thoughts. More than anything
he was a distraction. She needed to move on. She would be fine!
"I can do what I've always been doing. He doesn't need me. He has her." She scolded herself.
She kept telling herself that she would be fine. She as indeed a strong woman and she could carry
herself without a man. She had for years. Mara puffed out her chest and with a sigh went back to
working herself ragged. She can live without him, she did before their paths crossed. Life would
get back to the way it should have been. Skywalker free.
Don't turn around
'Cause you're gonna see my heart breaking
Don't turn around
I don't want you seeing me cry
Just walk away
It's tearing me apart that you're leaving
I'm letting you go
But I won't let you know...
~Six Standard Months Later~
Another ball was being held on Coruscant, and everyone who is anyone was attending. Mara got dressed in her slim fitting jungle green dress. The dress was layered with many lighter jungle green
chiffon with tiny sparkles like the forest of Yavin 4 after the rain fell. Two small straps on
her shoulders and a low cut in the front left for the imagination. The dress glittered in layers
and it showed when she spun around in a circle. Her hair was curled to perfection and laid loosely
on her shoulders and down her back. She wore a pair of strappy black high heels for leisure tonight and
dancing. She loved to dance. Maybe someone out there would be able to take her mind off of Skywalker.
Mara showed up at the ball by herself. She took note of the crowd. She could see Karrde standing
by a group of known business associates, by the bar she spotted the rogues, and by a small table
in the back she noticed Leia Organa Solo, her husband Han Solo, and the non other Luke Skywalker
conversing. Luke looked sad to her. She felt the need to go up to him and let him know that things
were okay no matter what it was. He should be happy. He had that..that..well her and life probably
couldn't get any better than that unless there was another Galactic War going to break loose.
As Mara Jade decided to turn around and walk over to her side of what she called the galaxy,
Luke turned his head and saw her. He gestured for her to come over. Great just what she needed.
Another run in with Skywalker. She could really do without this encounter. She nodded and went
to him as her feet and heart betrayed her mind. What was with her lately. *Well I better get this
over with* she silently said to herself.
"Mara Jade. How have you been?" Luke said as Mara finished the last couple of steps to their table.
"Great. Trade is good. How are things with you?" Mara asked Luke. Before he could respond Han
spoke up for him.
"Oh to tell you the truth Jade, he's miserable."
"Han! I'm fine."
"Kid, quit pretending."
"Alright Skywalker spill it!" She scolded.
"It's nothing really Mara. Promise." Luke spoke up with a soft voice.
"Sure it isn't."
"Mara, really. Let's not talk about it."
"If it concerns you and I am sure it does, it means you need to talk. Otherwise I'll have to
play catch up if half of Kessel decides to break free."
"I'll let you both catch up. I see that her highness would love to dance." Han said.
"I would love to General. Mara it was good to see you." Leia said as she held her gaze for a
second longer.
Han and Leia left for the dance floor leaving a very depressed Jedi and a very confused Trader
alone to talk.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Mara said unsure where to start.
"Isn't that my line?" Luke replied.
"Well it isn't like you to be this way. I'm not an emotional person, but maybe you just need
someone to unload all that bantha fodder you have been holding on your shoulders."
Luke made a small smile and then looked out to the balcony. Mara caught his gaze and nodded in
silent agreement. The both of them made their way to welcoming fresh air before them.
"Well?" Mara said as she turned to him.
"You know me so well. It's nothing. Just my problem really."
"So talk Skywalker. What has things all screwed up in that brain of yours."
"Nothing." he mumbled.
"What did the Jedi have a fall out with the love of his life?" She said sarcastically.
Luke's face went pale and his eyes shimmered with a hint of tears in them. Then the Jedi Master
mask was pulled in place.
"Jade. That's enough."
"I must have struck a nerve. I'm here. Let's talk." She said with a less harsh tone.
"Enough! Damn Jade. It's over between Callista and I. Didn't you get the memo or did you want
to rub it in my face more like everyone else has."
"What do you mean everyone else?"
"Everyone. It's everywhere. Even on the Holonet. I have had my fill of love. No more. It's not
for me."
"Well excuse me for living. I haven't been in touch with anyone to receive the latest Skywalker
affair."
"Sure. For someone who is in the business of information, surely had to know. Why don't you spell
it out for me Jade. Luke Skywalker is damned to live a life alone!" He practically shouted at her.
"You self-absorbed-son-of-a-sith! Just because some of us have different life styles doesn't me
it's always about you and your precious Jedi and who you're involved with. I could care less!"
Mara shouted back. Her anger boiling and spilling over in the inside.
"You, Mara Jade, are heartless. I figured as a friend you would know and at least be there for
a friend. I see that all you care about is yourself." He said aimed to hurt her like she did him.
"Love is weakness. As soon as you get with the program Skywalker, you'll see it. I will not be
weak ever again. Even if that means I have to be heartless. At least I'm not wallowing in all that
self pity your spilling. It's enough to make an entire bacta tank full!" She retorted back.
"This was a mistake. Thinking I could have a civil conversation with you. For once I thought
you might just be a friend and catch up. Instead you stay away for long amounts of time and all
you can do is bitch at me when we do meet. I don't need this right now. I don't need you." Luke
said. He hurt as he said the words.
Mara stared at the Jedi Master stunned. He didn't need her. Her heart needed him. She hated seeing
him in so much pain. However she was not going to stand and take this. Her biggest dreams were
coming true. The Jedi wasn't with the body snatcher. However this dream had taken a sharp turn
into her nightmare. Why did she always have to fight with him.
"Then what are you still doing here? Just go." Mara replied. The hurt coloring her eyes and
cheeks. She turned so Luke wouldn't see her heart breaking. Luke looked at her and realized
it was his queue to leave. He could feel all the pain he caused her and he just wanted to take
back everything he just said. Through their bond was a hint of sadness that he couldn't describe.
He felt horrible treating her this way. He wished he could take it all back. She was there for
him and he blew it. He would always need her. Even if it was the usual fighting.
"Just go Skywalker!" Mara shouted at him through the pain. She was surprised how well she managed
to keep her voice mainly steady.
"Goodbye Jade. I'll see you around. I'm sorry." He said as he walked away from her and away from
the rest of the ball.
I wish I could scream out loud
That I love you,
I wish I could say to you
Don't go...
(Spoken) As he walks away
He feels the pain getting strong
People in your life
They don't know what's going on
Too proud to turn around
He's gone
Don't turn around
'Cause you're gonna see my heart breaking
Don't turn around
I don't want you seeing me cry
Just walk away
It's tearing me apart that you're leaving
I'm letting you go,
As he left her whole body gave out and she slumped next to the railing. Always she was
teetering on the edge of life. With Skywalker it felt like she was wearing a thermal detonator
ready to blow. She knew that she loved him. That sick little voice in her head told her so. It
was the main reason she stayed away from Skywalker during his whole "Callista" experience. Not
once but twice this lady walked out on a good natured man. How dare she hurt him. Maybe it was
Mara who really had the problem. She thought about it quite frequently. She couldn't be loved
because she never knew what love was. She couldn't even give it. What was love? Does it feel like
the horrible hole she had in her heart? If that was love it could go right back to the spice mines
and stay there. The tears ran for what seemed like hours to her, though it was only a few minutes.
She couldn't believe it. She loved Luke. She could wait. She would always love him from afar.
That was the only love she could give him. Caring of friend. That was it. She stopped the crying
and dried her eyes. It was time to get out of here. Maybe another time and another place would
allow the Jedi to feel again. All she wanted for him was happiness. She would see to it that he
got it. She would give her all just to see her Farmboy smile once again. Mara picked herself
up and looked over the balcony. Maybe one day she could tell Luke that she loved him. Just not
anytime soon. With that Mara glanced back at the ball and realized she wouldn't be missed. She
jumped over the rails and ran for the docking bay. The tears were still in her eyes.
Baby don't turn around
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
Don't turn around
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
Just walk away
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
It's tearing me apart that you're leaving
I'm letting you go
Don't turn around
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
Don't turn around
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
Just walk away
Whoa whoa whoa whoa
Luke was at the docking bay waiting on Mara. He knew he had to apologize for what he said. He
also knew that Jade would be looking for away off this planet and away from him. What he didn't
expect to see is Mara running full force to her ship with tears? Why was she crying? Now he did
it. He cared deeply for her. Truth be told he cared more for her than just a friend at times. The
fact that he could affect Mara that way pulled at his heart. It was time to make it right.
"Mara?" He practically shouted. She slowed down and then stopped. She saw him and was not in the
mood to talk.
"What Skywalker?" She said.
"Oh Mara, I didn't mean those things. I was angry and hurt. I'm so sorry. You've been crying."
"Don't worry about it. I'm fine." She stated.
Luke looked at her and doubted it. "Please Mara. Can we talk?" he asked worriedly.
"Maybe later. I need my sleep. It's been a long enough night as it is."
"Mara, it can't wait. I said horrible things and I need to work this out with you before you
take off again. Can we just talk?"
"Fine. Come on Farmboy." Mara said as she entered the access code to her ship and the ramp lowered.
"Thanks." Luke said as they both went up the ramp to sort out everything.
~Fin~