Hi, first of all this story is a rewrite of what I called my 'Confused' series ('Can someone tell me what is going on' and 'Explanations would be helpful'… yeah I know the titles are… clunky to put it mildly)

There is no need to have read the original story, in fact it's probably better to have not read it. I have changed a lot of different things about the story, including almost all of Fliss's backstory. Some things I changed are things I meant to add in the long run of the original story others are just how Fliss has developed as a character in my head outside of the story along with trying to make her story less of a clone of some of my own experiences. Hopefully you still like it

SuperminionXD

I was in Science when it happened, when it started anyway. Absently doodling flowers in the margin of my exercise book while the man in the video droned on about protons and neutrons and the like. I didn't know it happened, I just wanted the lesson to hurry up and end. A knock came at the classroom door, and the image on the screen froze.

"May I take Felicity?" the woman, I vaguely recognised her from the school reception, asked the teacher. The teacher nodded quickly, the whole class stared as I swiftly tucked my books into my satchel. My chair screeched loudly as I stood up, why did they want me? Was I in trouble? I started chewing my lip, a nervous habit I was trying, and failing, to stop. The silent walk to the Main office felt like the longest most awkward walk of my life. My mind was a mess, wondering what on earth was happening. My Dad was in the Reception. He sat, staring at the floor, his brow more furrowed that I'd ever seen it.

"D-daddy? What happened?" I managed to stutter.

"You're Mother… she's in the Hospital…" my heart leapt to my throat, tears threatening.

"I-is she o-ok?" the words came out as high as if I were on helium

"She's fine, Sweetie, she just gave us a bit of a shock"

The relief almost exploded out of me. It took my several seconds to regain my senses.

"W-what happened?" I asked again, still a little shaky. Even the thought of something happening to Mummy terrified me, even if she was supposedly fine. I couldn't imagine losing her. Or Daddy or my brothers either. It was unfathomable.

"She was mugged. Guy had a knife." His sentences were short, as if each syllable hurt him. "We're all so lucky"

He pulled me into a massive bear hug. My chest shook as I breathed in the familiar smell of his woollen jumper.

"Do the boys know?" My voice came out muffled as I still clutched his waist. I tilted my head to look up at him, he shook his.

"We're picking her up from the Ward, then we'll pick them up" He explained, "I need you to be a big girl, ok? Daddy's got to look after your Mother for a bit, they won't understand as much as you. You've got to be strong for them: show them it's ok"

"Ok Daddy" I answered quietly, burrowing my head back into his stomach.

"Good girl, Flissy"

"I'm so glad you're ok, Mummy" my face now burrowed into her side. The side without the stab wound. She smelled of the Hospital, disinfectant with a faint trace of blood, it wasn't a nice smell, but I was past caring. I didn't want to ever let her go.

The hospital let her leave surprisingly fast, barely half an hour later we were in the car. I still held Mummy's free hand tightly as I helped her put the seatbelt over her sling. We both sat in the back while Daddy drove. The radio played classical music in the background as we pulled away, it was a jolly piece with lots of high violins that completely did not fit the current situation.

I slumped back onto the seat and closed my eyes in pure relief. The next thing I knew, a crash split my ears, everything exploded. Horns, engines, screeching. Glass floated in mid-air. My eyes darted around wildly. Bright white light burst in the corner of my eye. Mummy? Daddy? No! What was going on? Pain slashed my throat, my scream died and white overtook me.

It was so bright my eyes hurt.

Everything hurt.

The world was a blur

A blur of pain

Loud noises and red and blue flashes tried to break into my white haven.

Something pricked me, then the noises and lights left me to my numb whiteness. It was nice, comforting.

'Goodbye Flissy, I love you'

My head whirled round wildly.

Mummy?

She wasn't there.

There was only the stark whiteness.

A sharp beep cut through everything.

Then another.

The beeps kept coming, slow at first, but soon sped up: matching my heartbeat.

My throat felt dry and achy and blurs of colour began to bleed back into my white world. Bright yellow light stung my eyes.

"Felicity, can you hear me?"

The coloured blurs flashed, swam about and solidified into the shape of a man in a bluish-green hospital mask. My breathing sped up, along with the beeps.

A million thoughts jumped into my head at once.

Where was I?

Hadn't we just left the Hospital?

Why was I back here?

What happened?

Were Mummy and Daddy ok?

Where were they?

What about the Boys?

Why was I in hospital?

Why did I feel so weird?

What was that weird Light-place I'd just been?

Was it heaven?

Was I dead?

The breathing and beeps sped up even more. I slowly opened my mouth, still panting, all the words spinning round my brain tried to jump out.

Pain shot across my throat, but the only sound that came was a strange dry gurgle.

I tried to speak again, more slowly this time. My mouth shaped the beginning of the word. Then the pain shot again. A tiny croak. My neck felt fluffy, like cotton wool or clouds. Bandages?

The man in the surgery-mask placed his hand firmly on my shoulder, his eyes were soft, sympathetic…

"Don't try to speak" he said calmly, "You were in an accident, do you remember?"

I opened my mouth to speak again, then remembered the pain and closed it again. The noises and glass flashed straight back into my mind, as if it was happening all over again. The beeps sped up to twice the speed they'd been. I swallowed dryly, ignoring the flash of pain that came with it, and nodded slowly. The man's eyes softened further, reading my face like a book. The heart monitor beeps weren't helping either, though they slowed slightly as I managed to catch my raged breath, staring into the man's kind brown eyes.

"You've given your father quite the worry, young lady" the sentence sounded casual, but his eyes remained serious. I gasped, the pain shot once more.

Just Daddy.

Why did he just say Father?

Tears involuntarily spilled out of my eyes, making my cheeks sting.

The man looked away.

"Your Mother didn't make it" he voiced my worst fears, "She threw herself across the seats to protect you"

I remembered all the floating glass. Horns. Screaming.

No

It wasn't true…

It couldn't be true.

Swarms of bees filled my skull. The beep was loud and persistent.

When I woke next my whole body was made of marshmallow.

Pain Marshmallow.

This time there was a different figure at the side of the bed. Dark blonde hair was matted and piercing blue eyes, red.

Daddy!

I almost smiled, and opened my mouth to speak. This time only wheezing came, and dull gooey marshmallow pain.

The memories came again and struck me like a knife.

"Flissy, you're awake!" he exclaimed. His voice sounded both desperate and relieved; he looked twice as old as when I had last seen him. I opened my mouth again, but this time didn't even try to speak, I simply mouthed one word.

Mummy?

I saw tears spring in his eyes before my own became blurred.

The Doctor-man hadn't been lying.

Not that I thought he had, but now I had no choice but to believe. It felt like my heart was ripped straight from my chest. Perhaps it had? I hadn't been able to move either time I'd woken; I had no idea if my body was even still there!

I slowly and shakily lifted up my left hand to my face and blinked away the tears. My skin was paler than I remembered, almost white even. Pink lines criss-crossed my forearm, barely more than scratches. The man had said Mummy threw herself over me, my left arm, shoulder and head seemed to be the only things that were injured. I could feel the raised lines across my cheek and forehead. My neck was the only part I didn't know about: it was swathed in bandages from my jaw to my collarbone. Sometimes it felt like molten lava, other times it was so filled with cotton-wool-feeling that I couldn't sense any pain. No-one told me what happened to it. I still couldn't speak, after only the first day or so I simply stopped trying.

I didn't want to speak to anyone much anyway. Even Daddy and the Boys. Little Sammy climbed onto the hospital bed and tried to curl up next to me. Before I would have laughed and called it adorable. Now I just looked at him, tears springing afresh. After a while the Doctors seemed worried. They gave me a pen and paper: I pushed it off the table. They sent a lady to teach me to sign; I refused to look at her. The specialist said the glass damaged my vocal chords beyond repair. I would never speak again. I had to learn to communicate, they said: I didn't look at them either.

It was a few days later that they proclaimed me 'ready' to leave.

I didn't feel ready, I didn't think I'd ever feel ready again.

The journey home was the longest and most terrifying I'd had ever. I spent the entire time shivering with worry, every bump or turn was the crash all over again. It was slower, I didn't know if it was for me, or if Daddy was nervous too.

I felt a bit comforted being back in my own room. My bed was cold from disuse, it smelt like home a bit, but mostly of washing powder. I curled up under the duvet and fell asleep. It was easier to sleep, I hadn't slept much in Hospital, a combination of sadness and the constant light and noise of the ward. In my dreams I almost got back to the bright white place. I wish I could've got back there, it was nice, sadness didn't matter there.

I woke up slowly, the warm cocoon of my duvet was almost as comforting as the white place, except the heavy sadness that pressed down on me. I lay there for a while, wondering if perhaps, maybe, all that had happened in the last week was just a dream. But I knew deep down it wasn't. Tears pooled on my pillow and I tried to dry my eyes on the edge of my duvet. I slowly opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling.

The room was lit dimly by a soft white light. I couldn't quite tell where it came from, it wasn't moonlight since the curtains were slightly open, and the window behind was inky dark. It hadn't ever been this dark in the hospital, even when the ward lights were turned off, the fluorescent lights from the corridor cast straight onto her bed. Even here there was no darkness, the soft light touched the walls, leaving fuzzy shadows on the bookshelf. It was kinda pretty. I fell asleep staring through my tears at the light's pattern on the wall. It shifted as I pulled my duvet up to my chin but I was too tired to really notice.

In the morning the soft white was replaced by the harsh artificial yellow of my bedroom light.

"Fliss, you need to get up now" Dad announced, while I still blinked rapidly the harsh light hurting my eyes.

I plunged my head under my pillow, shaking it vigorously.

"Look, I know you don't want to do this, but you can't avoid it for ever" He sighed, I nodded under the pillow. "I'm giving you five minutes, if you're not out of bed when I come back then I'm carrying you downstairs in your Duvet"

I picked up the pillow, glared at him as he left the room. As soon as he was gone I re-covered my face with the pillow. The fabric soon became damp with tears. The five minutes soon passed, I did nothing.

"Right, I warned you" Dad's voice announced from beyond the pillow, his rough hands reached under my back and legs and lifted me up, bridal style. A few weeks ago he would've slung me over his shoulder like a fireman, and I would've squealed in both annoyance and laughter. But now, any thoughts of that time gave me yet another wound in my chest. Several tears dripped to the floor as I clutched the pillow as if it was my last hope. My feet thumped the door frame on the way out and the stair banister. The pain didn't really matter much to me, I pulled my feet back into my duvet cocoon as Dad deposited me on the sofa.

A woman sat perched on the arm chair opposite me. She was large and wore a pink fluffy dress. She reminded me quite a bit of Professor Umbridge from Harry Potter. Her thin smile practically dripped with false sympathy. I decided then and there that I did not like her one bit. She shifted forwards in the seat, lifting up her hands like an orchestral conductor.

"Hello Felicity. How are you feeling today?" She spoke slowly, signing each word as she said it rather like a person on a kids TV show. I glared at her and blocked her from my view with my pillow. My heart sank as the pillow was pulled from my grasp. I was forced to stare at the woman for what felt like several hours while she demonstrated hand signs for various everyday words. I glared at her the whole time. After she had left Dad let out a withered sigh.

"You're not helping yourself, Fliss, she was only trying to help you" I turned my glare on him and wished the lady had done the signs for 'take me back to bed and then leave me there for ever'.

He didn't take me back, he left me on the sofa and began making sandwiches. I ended up shuffling under my own steam to my seat at the table. The sandwiches were served on dinner plates for some reason. I took a nibble at the corner of one, it was cheese and very dry. Dad hadn't remembered the butter. I didn't like cheese sandwiches anyway. The lump of bread and cheese felt stuck in my throat long after I had swallowed. Swallowing still felt rather uncomfortable. David and Sammy didn't seem that fussed about the dry Cheese Sandwiches, they even laughed.

They were acting like it was normal!

How could they do that?

Nothing was normal

Nothing would ever be normal again.

I left the table and shuffled my way back to my room. Instead of curling back up into bed, I lay on the floor and pulled my sketchbook from under my bed. I don't know how long I lay on the floor, drawing anything and everything that came into my head. I ended up with a very crowded page of flowers, animals, objects… so many things I couldn't keep track. It was ugly. I stared mournfully at it and pushed the book back under my bed, I did that most of the time I messed up or drew something I didn't like. It was quite often.

I didn't know how long I had been drawing, but I felt hungry so I decided to drag my duvet downstairs again to ask for food. Or just get food for myself or something if I couldn't communicate my thoughts. I was beginning to think perhaps the idea of signing might be a good one. I still didn't like the woman though. I traipsed slowly down the stairs to find Dad and David watching the TV. Forgetting about food, I ended up snuggling on the sofa next to them. Sammy soon joined us, pulling himself onto Dad's lap.

"Daddy, when is Mummy coming back like Fliss?" he put his head on one side in pure innocence. His words stabbed me like a knife.

"Sammy, Mummy isn't coming home" Dad's lip trembled as he said it, I buried my head into his shoulder and tears drenched his shirt.

"Why?"

There was silence.

"Because she's dead" David said bluntly, it might've sounded heartless if it hadn't been for the tears glistening in his eyes.

"So she can't come?" Sammy asked.

"N-no, she can't" Dad replied, his voice cracked. Suddenly I couldn't take it anymore. I jumped up from the sofa and ran up the stairs, dragging my duvet behind me like a cape.

So, this ended up a lot more different than I planned, I hope you guys still like it. Fliss will become a little more like herself as the story goes on, I hope this didn't get too confusing.

Bye for now,

SuperminionXD