I looked around the streaming room. James, Seamus, Dan, Max, Jordan, and Eddie were sitting in the recliners; I was forced to take a floor seat. I didn't mind, of course, since I wasn't paying any attention to the movie being watched. Some stupid superhero movie that the others were engrossed in, but I couldn't care less about. Bright colors flashed on-screen, in contrast to the dark thoughts running through my head. Eddie thought that by taking me here for a while, having me stay with him at the creature house instead of by myself at home would make me feel better. He knew I was feeling low, he just didn't know the extent.
One trip to see some people I hardly knew wasn't going to erase what I was feeling, but for Eddie's sake, I pretended it was. I smiled and laughed, keeping what I really felt hidden inside, but it was killing me to do so. I pretended to watch the movie while red thoughts flashed through my mind.
Red. Such a wonderful color, red. The color of blood, the color of fresh wounds, the color of anger and hate, warning and destruction. The color of fire.
Fire- yet another great thing. The way it could take everything, leaving behind so little. It destroys without discrimination. It doesn't matter if you're a boy or girl, rich or poor, it doesn't matter what your race or religion or background is. It just destroys. Beautiful, really. The way flames flicker as they eat through things. I guess I was a bit of a pyromaniac, but only Eddie knew.
It was one of the reasons he decided to take me out here; he thought if I was away from my old life, in new surroundings, I would be less angry and destructive. Complete bull, of course, but I wasn't about to tell him that. My thoughts turned to that of fire as the movie ended and the credits rolled. Seamus snapped me out of my daydreams with a nudge from his foot.
"I think he's dead," he joked.
"Aleks, wake up! The movie's over!" James said from his seat. I blinked and rubbed my head.
"Wha- oh. Right," I said, perhaps a bit more angrily than what was necessary.
Eddie knew something was wrong right away. "Aleks, what's up?"
"I'm fine!" I snapped, then took a deep breath and stood up. "I'm fine, really. It's just- I feel like destroying something beautiful," I said quietly.
"Eddie's never seen Fight Club, Aleks. He won't get that reference," Dan called, stretching.
"Whatever, I'm kind of tired. I'm going to head up to my room, I'll probably go to sleep early," I said while I headed towards the stairs. I wanted to be alone, and I seriously hoped the guys understood. I made my way to Eddie's room, where I was sleeping. I threw myself onto the bed, and punched at the pillow. They all thought I was making a movie reference, that I was just kidding around. I wasn't. I couldn't exactly destroy something of Eddie's to make myself feel better, but the nagging urge to set something alight wouldn't go away.
I settled for grabbing my laptop and loading up a new single-player world in Minecraft. Turning on creative mode, I found the biggest, most beautiful forest I could, and gave myself lava buckets and flint-and-tinders. As I watched the forest go up in a ball of flame, I decided that wasn't enough. I spawned tons of friendly mobs and villagers into the wreckage, watching them catch alight and fall.
"Burn, fuckers, burn," I muttered, when I heard a knock on the door behind me. It was Eddie.
"Hey dude, you alright? What was that downstairs?" He asked gently. I could tell he liked me; it was almost impossible to miss. The way he talked to me, the way he would mess with me when no one else was around. I supposed I might've liked him too, in another time. His skin was the perfect tanned shade, his deep brown eyes that reflected everything in a kinder light, his contagious smile that was never far from his lips - he was completely beautiful. In another time, I could've loved him back, but right now, his sickly- sweet, bubbly personality was giving me a headache.
"Hello? Earth to Aleks?" He said, crossing the space between us and sitting on the bed with me. His eyes flew to the computer screen that I tried desperately to hide; the computer screen that still showed the burning remains of a forest, and animals running from spreading lava pools. He let out a small gasp, and I snapped the laptop shut.
"I'm fine, Eddie. What the hell do you want?"
"Chill. I just came up here to check on you and make sure everything's alright. You don't have to be so angry about it," I could tell he was trying to calm me down, but red clouded my vision, and I felt something snap.
"Just leave me alone!" I shouted.