A Reminder
By LD
GW Fanfic
Warnings: Yaoi, angst, rape references
Dedicated to Akuma
Author's note: I can't remember if Heero was right there when Odin was assassinated. Oh well.
XXXXXXXXXX
The rain makes me sad.
I gaze upward into the storm, letting the water blind me.
It reminds me of Odin. It reminds me of home.
Odin hated the rain with a passion. If it rained, he'd sit inside, moaning about it. He'd make me play cards with him and curse it.
It was raining when he died.
I remember how much it hurt to come home without him. To know that he wouldn't be waiting for me come home. He wouldn't be there to mess up my hair and insist that I make dinner because, despite the fact that I was only six, I was a much better cook than he was. I remember standing there for the longest time, waiting for him. I had seen him die, knew he was gone, but I stood there anyway, soaking wet, covered in soot. Odin would have had a fit. I waited.
I don't know how long I stayed there waiting for him. I don't know when I left. I hadn't even realized I'd moved until someone started talking to me and I looked up into the alleyway. With the water soaking deep into my skin, I agreed to go with the man.
I don't think I ever said a word to him, but I was lost without Odin.
XXXXXX
"Heero! What the hell are you doing?"
I look down to see Duo walking toward me. His jacket is pulled up over his head, and he's making the face of a cat being forced to take a bath.
"Quatre sent me out to get you." He hisses at me, glaring scathingly at the watery landscape.
I try to put my hands in my pockets, but they're soaked through and impossible to get anything into. I was returning home when it started to rain. It doesn't rain often on the colonies, and I haven't felt it since the day J picked me up. I froze.
"Come on..." Duo grabs my arm, still holding his jacket up with one hand and his shoulder.
XXXXXX
"Heero... Are you okay?" Quatre asks me, concerned. I tear my eyes away from the window and realize that the tea he's given me is now only luke warm.
"I'm fine, Quatre." He looks only slightly less worried, but I don't know what I could say that would make him feel better. I stand, clasping the soft pink towel around my shoulders and move to go upstairs.
"Tell me if you need anything..." He trails off as I don't reply.
XXXXXX
I haven't thought of Odin in years. Not since that day, in fact. Why should I think about it now?
I peel off the wet tank top and jeans, lay them out to dry, and replace them with a pair of dry boxers WuFei gave me for Christmas.
And I stand there, staring at the room.
It wasn't seeing him bleeding, dying, that got to me. It wasn't real even when I returned home and there was no happy blonde there waiting for me. I waited for him to come home and he didn't. I didn't know what to do without him.
"Heero?"
I look around. Duo's halfway through the door. I'm in the way. I step aside to allow him to enter. I sit down at my laptop just because it's something to do. It is something I do.
"Are you okay?"
I realize I'm just staring at the screen. What's wrong with me?
I need Odin.
The lights in the room fade suddenly, then come back to full strength. Duo curses. He tears open the curtains. With the fall of darkness, the storm has gotten worse. The lights cut out entirely as he steps back.
My eyes widen at the darkness. I don't like the darkness. It reminds me of the time before Odin. It was always dark when they took me. It was always dark.
I whimper.
"Huh?" Duo looks over in my direction. I can't see it, but I know.
I stand up and walk carefully over to him. I touch his shoulder, and he reaches an arm out to touch back.
We always slept together. I don't think he liked the dark either. He never touched me like they did. I never thought about it before, but I loved him for that. He was my brother.
I twine my fingers with Duo's. There's a flash of lightning, and I can see his calm eyes. He won't ask.
"Can I sleep with you tonight?"
"Okay Heero."
He lays down and lets me curl up beside him. There's nothing sexual about it at all. He lays a hand on my hair and pets it. We lay there like that for a long time, listening to Quatre and Trowa elsewhere in the dark. We all have emergency flashlights, but neither of us moves to retrieve them.
"I'm afraid of dogs." He states out of nowhere. I nod. He understands.
I nuzzle his shirt and drape an arm across his chest.
We fall asleep like that.
XXXXXX
In the morning it's forgotten. Everything from the day previous is gone now. Even the rain has stopped, which is probably why Duo is so chipper. I don't think he likes the rain any more than Odin did.
XXXXXX
End
Warnings: Yaoi, angst, rape references
Dedicated to Akuma
Author's note: I can't remember if Heero was right there when Odin was assassinated. Oh well.
XXXXXXXXXX
The rain makes me sad.
I gaze upward into the storm, letting the water blind me.
It reminds me of Odin. It reminds me of home.
Odin hated the rain with a passion. If it rained, he'd sit inside, moaning about it. He'd make me play cards with him and curse it.
It was raining when he died.
I remember how much it hurt to come home without him. To know that he wouldn't be waiting for me come home. He wouldn't be there to mess up my hair and insist that I make dinner because, despite the fact that I was only six, I was a much better cook than he was. I remember standing there for the longest time, waiting for him. I had seen him die, knew he was gone, but I stood there anyway, soaking wet, covered in soot. Odin would have had a fit. I waited.
I don't know how long I stayed there waiting for him. I don't know when I left. I hadn't even realized I'd moved until someone started talking to me and I looked up into the alleyway. With the water soaking deep into my skin, I agreed to go with the man.
I don't think I ever said a word to him, but I was lost without Odin.
XXXXXX
"Heero! What the hell are you doing?"
I look down to see Duo walking toward me. His jacket is pulled up over his head, and he's making the face of a cat being forced to take a bath.
"Quatre sent me out to get you." He hisses at me, glaring scathingly at the watery landscape.
I try to put my hands in my pockets, but they're soaked through and impossible to get anything into. I was returning home when it started to rain. It doesn't rain often on the colonies, and I haven't felt it since the day J picked me up. I froze.
"Come on..." Duo grabs my arm, still holding his jacket up with one hand and his shoulder.
XXXXXX
"Heero... Are you okay?" Quatre asks me, concerned. I tear my eyes away from the window and realize that the tea he's given me is now only luke warm.
"I'm fine, Quatre." He looks only slightly less worried, but I don't know what I could say that would make him feel better. I stand, clasping the soft pink towel around my shoulders and move to go upstairs.
"Tell me if you need anything..." He trails off as I don't reply.
XXXXXX
I haven't thought of Odin in years. Not since that day, in fact. Why should I think about it now?
I peel off the wet tank top and jeans, lay them out to dry, and replace them with a pair of dry boxers WuFei gave me for Christmas.
And I stand there, staring at the room.
It wasn't seeing him bleeding, dying, that got to me. It wasn't real even when I returned home and there was no happy blonde there waiting for me. I waited for him to come home and he didn't. I didn't know what to do without him.
"Heero?"
I look around. Duo's halfway through the door. I'm in the way. I step aside to allow him to enter. I sit down at my laptop just because it's something to do. It is something I do.
"Are you okay?"
I realize I'm just staring at the screen. What's wrong with me?
I need Odin.
The lights in the room fade suddenly, then come back to full strength. Duo curses. He tears open the curtains. With the fall of darkness, the storm has gotten worse. The lights cut out entirely as he steps back.
My eyes widen at the darkness. I don't like the darkness. It reminds me of the time before Odin. It was always dark when they took me. It was always dark.
I whimper.
"Huh?" Duo looks over in my direction. I can't see it, but I know.
I stand up and walk carefully over to him. I touch his shoulder, and he reaches an arm out to touch back.
We always slept together. I don't think he liked the dark either. He never touched me like they did. I never thought about it before, but I loved him for that. He was my brother.
I twine my fingers with Duo's. There's a flash of lightning, and I can see his calm eyes. He won't ask.
"Can I sleep with you tonight?"
"Okay Heero."
He lays down and lets me curl up beside him. There's nothing sexual about it at all. He lays a hand on my hair and pets it. We lay there like that for a long time, listening to Quatre and Trowa elsewhere in the dark. We all have emergency flashlights, but neither of us moves to retrieve them.
"I'm afraid of dogs." He states out of nowhere. I nod. He understands.
I nuzzle his shirt and drape an arm across his chest.
We fall asleep like that.
XXXXXX
In the morning it's forgotten. Everything from the day previous is gone now. Even the rain has stopped, which is probably why Duo is so chipper. I don't think he likes the rain any more than Odin did.
XXXXXX
End