"And that seems to be all of the new business. Back to old business. There seems to be a personnel discrepancy. As you know, the Greenwich got an XO and he is going to want to know things like this. Fortunately, we are not having to run a full inventory count – we would be too short-handed to do that in addition to our standard duties anyways. But back to it the business…

In one file, we have a Spacer (third class) who is assigned to us. In another file, he is listed as 'in transit'. According to records, he arrived here almost two whole years ago. Which is it? Is he really assigned to us or is he in transit to some other posting? Even if he was in transit, he would have had to report to someone after the first week. What? Don't we have a Chief for transitory enlisted? So, he never reported for duty? Anyone contact us and ask us about a missing spacer? Okay – right. Huh.

What you are telling me – and what I have to report to our new XO – is that we have had an extra hand on the station for twenty three months with no official duties? What is his name…'Prigal'? Hah! No – I was being facetious. 'Facetious' – it means I was joking. Please tell me we actually have a name for him. "Johannson, Eric". Wait – if he got here 23 months ago, what has he been doing all this time? You don't know – well, pull his file. Shoot me a copy while you are at it. Thank you. Hmmph. Hey – this is a big file for a S/3C. That's interesting – he went through a glut of testing when he got here. Hah! I guess he had a lot of time on his hands and was bored. Really, really bored for him to take those tests. Huh – all the way through Master Chief Warrant…and both the Navy and Marine series. Oh, come on…that is ridiculous. How would an S/3C plow through all that? And why? Nobody gets that bored. He had to have at least passed the tests in order to keep going. Let's see how he did…pull the results. Well, he is missing grades for the first three in the Navy series – make a note to BuPers about that – his file should have that included.

This is some kind of prank – a joke, right? This has got to be a put-up job. Fifteen of the eighteen exams (that we can see), he received one grade of 'pass', six grades of 'honours' and eight grades of 'high honours'. This didn't raise any red flags? This series of exams would normally take years to complete. Fine – you look at the results. I am telling you that is what is there. What? Yes – good idea. Have a data tech check this file for tampering. And I will request a confirmation of his scores from BuPers. Yeah – attack it from both ends. Maybe hacking his own service jacket is what got him dumped here. But considering how odd it looks, not likely. If he had enough brains to hack his own file, he would be smart enough to make it believable.

For arguments sake, let's say this is legit. Ludicrous, but legit. What do we have? One month of hitting the books, testing and then…what? Twenty two months of scut work? Don't we have forms for that sort of thing? Some sort of addendum for his service jacket? Okay, here they are. And what do they say? 'Deck scrubbing', 'hull painting', 'KP duty'. 'cleaning out hydroponics tanks', 'minor repair work', blah blah blah. Nothing else? No, huh? His entire career appears to be nothing but scut work...and testing. Anyone rate his work? Hmmm – that is true, what can be said about the quality of scut work, besides that it was done. Any discipline problems? Contraband? Gambling? Drinking or drug problems? None? Are you sure he belongs here?

Interesting – it looks like he has not been issued his military ID yet. Nor gone through any formal indoctrination. There is some kind of hold-up with the background check. 'Planet of origin: Unknown'. How can they not know what planet he is from? Oh right, it only means that he could not 'prove' where he was from. You have to love the bureaucrats. Why? Because we can't kill them fast enough to…let's just skip that, shall we?

So, if he has not been through Basic – how it he is a Spacer, third class? 'Acting Spacer, third class'? How does that happen and who issued him the rank? What do you mean that is not in his file? Tssk - another little blemish for BuPers. So, why did they dump him here if…oh right, right – 'Black Sheep'. Never mind. Sometimes I think that we are the dumping grounds for BuPers 'problems'.

Think we should dump him onto Intelligence and let them worry about him? What was that? We tried and they didn't care? Is that all they had to say? They did a standard check against the outstanding warrants file and didn't find him. They sent a request to his claimed planet of origin and have not yet had a reply. Uh huh. 'Earth' is his claimed planet of origin, eh? Well, that explains the delay. We probably forgot to say 'pretty please' when submitting the request. Yes, the Earthers never did respond with any speed to requests for info.

Super. What about his documents and travel permits? Where were they issued from? That can't be right – when does a destroyer captain issue travel papers? What about before that – everyone has a paper trail. Nothing? Don't tell me – let me guess. It either is not included in his file or has been redacted. Pffft – send his file to the Intel branch and ask them to take another look. Hell, say 'pretty please' if that is what it takes. Even if they decide to help, it is going to take a lot of time. Joy.

Say, doesn't our new XO have some ties with Intel? Maybe I can ask the XO if he wants to interview him – you know, find out if he is secretly a Havenite spy or something? So, let's put together a report about this Spacer, third class Eric Johannson, encrypt it and send it up. Well, that doesn't really settle the issue – it just gives us some breathing room. The last item for today is a reminder that the GNS Covington is still looking for volunteers from the RMN.

Yes, I see that gleem in your eye. I had though of killing two tree-cats with one stone. However, the CO of the Covington,a 'Captain Fells', has mandated that anyone transferring to their ship be trained in damage control. No, Johannson does not have that…yet. Interestingly, he put in the paperwork for the training just today. Unfortunately, there seems to be a waiting list to get into that course. And yes, when I speak to the XO, I will mention the possibility and ask his assistance in getting our poor, neglected S/3C into some training classes.

I don't think the Covington wants raw recruits though, so we might get him bumped to S/1C once he is trained. With his testing scores, they should be eager to snatch him up. At least we can get him off of our list of problems. If he pans out – the Graysons will owe us a favor. If he doesn't, well, Intel didn't follow through with proper procedures, did they? We done here? Good – it's time to brief the XO. Same time next week, gents."