Chapter One

Kobayashi Maru

Star Date - 2443

Lieutenant Admiral Janeway's Quarters

"You look so handsome, son." Kathryn Janeway fixed the lapel of Sebastian's green Starfleet uniform, adjusting his pin ever so slightly. He looked away out of respect, to suppress the urge of rolling his eyes at his mother's affection. Janeway caught his eyes, her lips pursed, a bit smug, but a hint of a smile as always, "Ensign Sebastian Andrew Janeway, I'm so proud of you. You finally made it."

"Yes, mother. I made it." Sebastian adjusted the sleeve, rolled it up a notch. His mother gingerly rolled it back down. His nostrils flared, "Please, mom, leave it alone. This is embarrassing enough, having to join Starfleet as Ensign at 29. I'm the oldest ensign and to top it all of, I have you to thank for this, mother dearest. Lieutenant Admiral Kathryn Janeway. Sebastian Andrew Janeway. This is perfect. You are setting us up for disaster on the Icarus. You know you are."

"Absolutely not, son. I would never. At the very least you made the helm, Bastian, don't be so ungrateful to the Janeway name." Her eyes averted his. He couldn't tell if it was pride or scorn for the lack of a husband. Duty overtook him somewhere in the stars and they never spoke of him. "I went to bat for you in front of the entire Command. Picard was there. He spoke up for you but what you did was reprehensible."

Bastian steadied his breath, "You're talking about the simulation again. Of course you are! Of course!" His lip quivered a bit, "Well, you let the BORG in on our little secret. You let Seven of Nine out of the Collective and now what did you expect? You blew this for me, Lieutenant! You!" He plopped down one of the couches and traced his eyebrow with his finger.

"You are not listening to what I am saying, Bastian. You never listen to me and this is why you get into trouble. Explain to me what happened when you ran the Kobayashi Maru simulation, Ensign." He remained silent, "I'm talking to you as your mother, not as Admiral Janeway. As your mother. What you did was absolutely disgusting. It was disgraceful and that is why you earned your rank. This is exactly why the Vulcans do not trust us. What did you do when you had your chance at the helm? Explain it to me."

"You read the report." He said through clenched teeth.

"You engaged with the Borg and released - what was it? - A tachyon beam, Ensign that attracted the Borgs to the Vulcan homeworld and that is why you are Counselor Ensign Janeway." Her lips trembled with annoyance at her son. Pulling stunts, constantly calling on the name of his mother when he needed help. Fights at bars. Rowdy seedy undergrounds. Avoiding curfew. Getting into fights. Bastian fought the tears that formed at his eyes, avoiding her gaze. He watched as she sat down at her vanity mirror and began to pick up the maroon tendrils that were left so sloppily at her shoulders. She could not even meet his eyes.

"You think that I don't know what you're doing but you're so wrong, mother." He said before biting his lower lip. Lowering his eyes once again. "Lareil came to your quarters that night crying. I know she did. Because of Tuvok. Just admit it." He stood up, hands at the hips, similar posture. Admiral Janeway continued to work on her bun, her eyes never moving from the task at hand. Bastian lifted his chin and made his way behind his mother, looking at her reflection.

"I don't want to talk about Tuvok, Bastian. Not right now. Explain to me your mission on Icarus. Please, for my sanity." Another pin made the bun tighter.

"I don't want to, Mother," He said, placing his hand on her shoulder. "I want to talk about what happened that Lareil Narim Shunahd came to your quarters crying after what I did on that simulation. Do you carry guilt, Mother?" His neck cocked to the side but not before Admiral Janeway stood up and slammed her hand on the vanity mirror.

"I SAID ENOUGH, BASTIAN! YOU ARE PESTERING ME WHILE I AM TRYING TO ENJOY YOUR CEREMONY. DO YOU FORGET THAT I AM LOSING MY SON? MY ONLY SON?!" Her voice was loud at basso profundo. Bastian readied himself for a slap but he watched his mother melt right before his eyes as she placed her hand on his cheek and kissed him on the temple by his brow. "You are my son and I love you. If you want my advice, I can give it to you, however, you must take everything I say with a grain of salt."

"During the Kobayashi Maru Simulation, I was the weapons officer and Lareil was the Commander of the vessel U.S.S. Collins which had a very similar to design to Voyager. A group of Cardassian Maquis were hailing a distress signal close to the Vulcan homeworld. I then suggested that it could potentially be a threat but Ensign…"

"Well now she has been promoted to Doctor the Icarus because of your mistake." Her eyebrows raised to see what he would do but all he was left with was his mouth wide open. Shock. Confusion. He walked over to her bed, sat down, stared at his boots for a moment before looking back up at his mother.

"How? Mother, she's going to go crazy and I'm not going to be responsible for her." He shrugged his shoulders then crossed his right knee over his left, his foot flexing back and forth to suppress his anxiety. "Mother, you did this. You know you did this. What happened when she spoke to you?"

"Ensign Counselor Linguistics Officer of the U.S.S. Icarus, I am speaking to you as Lieutenant Admiral Kathryn Janeway now. Before we go to this ceremony and you blow up that ship when you get to your post, explain to me what happened when you ran the simulation so I don't have to send a rescue mission to find you in the Delta Quadrant myself, you fool."

"Oh, mother, you didn't." Sebastian's eyebrows flared up, a hint of a smile. He licked his lips for a moment, trying to hide the giggle in his eyes. Sebastian folded his hands. "Okay, so he were are. The Cardassians sent out a flair over the Vulcan homeworld, with a Maquis insignia. As Lareil, Ms. Vulcan Homeschool Over Sensitive, was the Commander in Chief, she suggested that we hail them on the viewing screen."

"And who did you see on the viewing screen?"

"A Cardassian by the name of Prylem Zaatrike Anghobar. When Doctor Shunahd asked them to identify themselves, they said they were part of the resistance but not hostile. Lieutenant Commander Wildman of U.S.S. Arbor suggested that it was also a trap and that she could not tell the origin of the species to which Doctor Shunahd replied 'Bajoran', but I knew something was wrong so I suggested we ask them to lower their shields to which that Klingon idiot-"

"Bastian, not now, please. Continue. What did Lareil do when she was sitting in the Captain's seat?" Admiral Janeway continued to fix her hair, standing up while her son averted his gaze. She stuck a pin in her mouth and motioned him to hurry up with another hand, "Please, we don't have all day for your extravagant stories, Ensign."

"It was a woman, mother. Prylem Zaatrike Anghobar was a woman and she had a certain tone that reminded me of the other Cardassian woman from your own log so I suggested to Prylem that if she didn't tell the weapons officer aboard the Maquis vessel that we would have to fire to which Lareil replied that it wasn't necessary to engage the enemy. Then another man on the ship came on the viewing screen by the name of Guhlin Jarab Ahmat."

"Guhlin sounds a lot like Glin, doesn't it?" Admiral Janeway traced her nose with her index finger and she puckered her lips while applying a dark lip. It was typical but still extraordinarily beautiful. Almost otherworldly even for a human. "So Doctor Shunahd was outranked by Lieutenant Wildman because of what?"

"Well, Ahmat threatened to shoot to protect the Vulcan homeland and so I opened fired a Level One Photon Phaser on the port side to which he replied that one of the Borg who was released as a Cardassian drone from the Collective had returned to the Hive to inform the Borg Queen of the location of the Vulcan Homeworld and they were sending a scouting ship. Doctor Shunahd was in such a state of panic that she needed to have a seat to collect her… thoughts and she slammed her foot once or twice and stood up and said that she would destroy the Vulcan homeworld herself before she let it be claimed by the Borg."

"Intolerance of other species considering all that Seven of Nine has done for Starfleet. Some of our best Lieutenants are Borg drones leading the resistance against the Borg Queen. Shameful of her, I suppose." Kathryn Janeway dusted herself off once more and motioned for him to stand. She licked her thumb and traced it over his eyebrow. His head was bald, a small bit of a beard. Young but wise beyond his age had always been her assessment. Maybe a smart ass, too. "You must have a hard time dealing with your stress, son. Your eyebrows are all mangled like a Cardassian. Come… We're going to be late. We can walk the long way, I don't mind offering you my advice as an Admiral."

"What a special day, Lieutenant Admiral. I could not be any prouder to bear the Janeway name for your sake." Janeway linked arms with him as the doors to her bed chambers slid open and they walked through her new living quarters. Twice the size of any Commander in Starfleet. "Imagine all the stress that I have to deal with to carry your name, mom. It's embarrassing to the core."

"Don't be embarrassed by greatness. It is a great trait to have." And as she poured a cup of hot cocoa, she leaned up against the island in her eating quarters. "So, please, explain this faster because I not only did I have to go to bat for you so did Picard and your aunt, Seven." Her eyebrows quirked up as she set it against her lips but Bastian just stood there, scratching his head.

"So that's when I let Lieutenant Wildman take over for a little and she suggested that we lead an away team to stop the beam that they were trying to build over the Vulcan homeworld to which Ms. Lareil Narim Shuhnad declared that we were in Code Red and that everyone was to man their battle stations while the away team dealt with the rebel Maquis who were building a level 3 Photonic Beam with Plasma capabilities and they were going to drill into the Vulcan core. What's interesting mother is that Lareil Narim Shuhnad doesn't want to admit her own Vulcan ancestry, I caught it in her voice and the curve right between her brows."

"Congratulations, everyone in Starfleet knew of her Klingon ancestry. Moving on. So, what did you do?" This was boring, she set her coffee down and walked around the island that was there, "I will tell you Ensign Janeway exactly what you did. You decided to hail a Borg ship - didn't you? - by hitting the Maquis rig with a tachyon beam that shared the same frequency as a Cardassian photonic beam didn't you?"

All he could do was nod. She continued, "I read the reports, my darling boy. You can't fool me."

"Yes, Lieutenant, I hailed a Borg scouting ship and they began their speech: 'We are the Collective', we will begin to assimilate and finally Lareil, with her shoulder length hair, traced her front bang like so and said that if they did not stand down, she would destroy the Vulcan homeworld and she asked me to fire a warning beam, but by this time, Chief Engineer Morkan'a said we had taken too great of a hit by the Cardassian's who had called in for reinforcement Maquis. We were out numbered on all sides of the ship, mother. I don't know what else I was supposed to do. What could I have done better?"

"Well, first of all, you fool, you should never have hailed for the Borg scouting ships because then what happened?" Kathryn walked back around the island, picked up her steaming cup of hot cocoa, blew it once more and began to listen with intent, her eyes searching for her son's lies.

"I let the Borg destroy the Vulcan homeworld." He lowered his head, bit his lip for a moment, and looked away.

"Exactly. That's exactly what you did Ensign Janeway. You blew up the Vulcan homeworld and that is why she is Lieutenant Shuhnad to you."

Bastian stamped his foot, then placed both of his hands directly on his hip. "No, Mother. No she isn't! I will not be working in Sick Bay with that… that… FREAK!"

"Lower. Your. Voice. Ensign Sebastian Andrew Janeway. You do not have privilege in Starfleet. You have nothing. You have your hard work as a Counselor. Perhaps you struggle with your own sensitivities as having a mother who returned her crew in 25 years… give or take."

"So, then, tell me. Who is this captain of Icarus? I'm just dying to know." Bastian closed his eyes for a moment, feeling the sweat beginning to build at his brow. Regret. His lip quivered for a moment.

"You're not going to like it, Bastian."

"Just tell me."

"Romul of Twelve."

"A BORG?! They're letting me on a ship with the first BORG General of Starfleet? And they're sending us to help the Akritirians?!" Bastian's eyes met directly with his mother's own gaze. They both raised their brows, she licked her lips while she continued to sip on her hot cocoa. "Seriously, mom?! This is because of what I did to Lareil?! Is that what they're trying to say about our family?"

"I did good, didn't I?" Kathryn smirked, then took another sip. "75 Years in the Delta Quadrant can be a little lonely at night. We better get going, I don't want anyone to think that you have privileges."

"Oh, mother..." And she set down her cup right on the table in the living quarters, walked out of the tunnel into the Starfleet Courtyard.