Okay, while you're waiting for me to get off my lazy butt and finish my other stories, here's a few fun one-shots about crack Warriors pairings. When I'm bored I'll work on a few and put them here. This is my first time writing crack, so please tell me if I'm good at it. If you have any good crack ideas please tell me!

SquirrelxCrow

There she is again. She can't keep her paws off of Crowfeather. Can't she stay away from him for at least a day? It makes me sick! First of all, she's a medicine cat. I always thought she was good little Leafpool, never breaking the code! And she's a ThunderClan cat…which I admit I am too, but still! Can't Crowfeather see that I am better for him than my goody little sister?

I hear them talking, saying things like "run away" and "get away." I bet they're planning their little getaway so they can go and have kits! It's time for me to intervene.

I gingerly stepped out of my hiding place in the bush. The rustle made Crowfeather jump. His beady eyes stared at me, filling me with a warm glow. Leafpool whipped her head and around and narrowed her green eyes at me.

"What…what are you doing here?" stammered Leafpool, her expression a mix between surprise and anger. I narrowed my eyes and inched myself closer so we were not even a mousetail apart.

"Funny. I was about to ask you the same thing," I growled. Crowfeather just stood in shock, his mouth slightly ajar. Looks like I saved the day. Too bad for Leafpool. Now, if I can just get her away, maybe I can talk with Crowfeather.

"Listen, Leafpool. You shouldn't be talking to a WINDCLAN cat here." I chided, pushing my face into hers. "Get out of here, or else I'll tell Firestar."

Leafpool hissed, spit flying into my face. "Fine, Squirrelflight. See if I care. It's too late for you to do anything, anyway." She dismissively flicked her tail and stalked away in the direction that I followed her scent from.

Crowfeather stared at me. "Why'd you do that?" he hissed. "I love her and you know that."

I released a small sigh. "Yeah, but she's a medicine cat. And…I…" I stammered. I was at a loss for words. His eyes bore into my heart and I felt like snow in the sun, melted and warm. "You see, Crowfeather, I…love you."

He just stared me in the face. I'm such a mousebrain! Why did I think I had a chance with him? He loved Leafpool and I knew that. I sighed, lowered my head, and, deflated, padded toward where I came from.

I heard his breath behind me and his thumping feet pounding on the forest floor. "Wait, Squirrelflight, don't go," he mumbled, his voice sounding like it was trapped deep inside him. I slowly turned around and faced him.

"The truth is, I don't like Leafpool. I was just…using her to get to you," he continued. I looked him in his eyes. They looked kind and soft, unlike the Crowfeather I usually see.

"I love you too," he added after a long beat. His eyes shone in the moonlight. They completely captivated me and lit a warm fire inside of my heart. I resisted the urge to bounce excitedly and let out a mrrrow of amusement.

"Then it's settled," I meowed, Crowfeather inching closer to me. "When do we start?"

"How about now?" Crowfeather asked as I felt his tongue gently slide across my fur. The warm night hair and his calm, steady breathing relaxed me. It wasn't long before I felt Crowfeather's breathing slow and I knew he was asleep. I purred and gently closed my eyes, feeling happy at last.

I fell asleep with him besides me.