I'm kicking back in the office of Freddy Faz Bear's Pizza and munching down on my sweet and spicy chili Doritos. I've decided to work part time as a security guard and I'm all dressed up in my black blazer jacket over my usual clothes and a security guard hat. "What can I say? I got style!" I said to you readers. "By the way, yours truly is working as the night watchman. After a long day of work as a merc, I decided to veg out and do some part time work." Suddenly the phone started to ring.

"Hello? Hello?"

"Hi!" I replied, loudly.

"Uh, I wanted to record a message for you to help you get settled in on your first night."

"That's nice of you." I said, as I'm throwing each blood dart at the picture of Batman, hitting it in the eye. "Bulls eye! Or should I say, bat's eye?"

"Deadshot ain't got shit on you!" My chibi version of myself said.

"So, just be aware, the characters do tend to wander a bit."

"Le gasp!" I said in my French accent.

"Uh, they're left in some kind of free roaming mode at night. Uh...Something about their servos locking up if they get turned off for too long. Uh, they used to be allowed to walk around during the day too. But then there was The Bite of '87."

"Well I'm well intrigued, wouldn't you say viewers?" I asked, looking at the fourth wall.

"Yeah. I-It's amazing that the human body can live without the frontal lobe, you know?"

"Holy shit!" I said.

"Yuck! I'm gonna hurl now!" My chibi self said, disappearing.

I turned off the voice message thing to get through the plot as I checked the cameras and noticed one of the animatronic characters are missing. "Where he go?" I asked, as I checked the closet the Bunny is there. "There you are, pretty bunny thing." I leaned back on my chair whistling to Karate by Tenacious D, but then my Chibi Self appeared on my shoulder and made a suggestion.

"Let's call Deadpool!" He exclaimed.

"Great Idea, it'll make my job quicker," I answered as I'm dialed his number. "Knowing DP, he could be watching reruns of old sitcoms or stuffing his face with chimichangas."

"Draco my boi!" He answered, with his mouth sounded full.

"Hey Wade, stuffing your face with chimichangas I hear?"

"You know me well!"

"Of course, you're like an sensation in the Internet and comic books."

"I know, I'm awesome. So watcha doin' my blooded brother?"

"I took the job as the night watchman."

"Sounds boring."

"Yeah, but there's more."

"Oh, do tell!" Deadpool said, sounded giddy.

Several hours went by as I'm having a conversation with the Merc with the Mouth, him and I were having a blast.

"So let me get this straight: you took the job at an old pizza joint, and the phone guy who use to work there says that these animatronics do wonder around and tries to stuff you in a bear suit!?" The Merc asked.

"Yeah it sounds scary; I'm a big boy anyways," I answered nonchalantly. "These guys can try, besides even if I'm in trouble, my fellow Team BDSS friends can come to my aid. And probably you too." (A/N: team BDSS is a reference to Sai Kunai Blade's fanfic, RWB-Sai. I recommend you guys to check it out.) "Wow, that rabbit spends too much time in that closet."

"Maybe it has feelings for you?" Deadpool said, teasingly.

"Hah! I see what you did there."

"Yeah. If you died, can I have Laura?"

"Like hell you do!" I shouted.

"Pleeeassse?" He begged.

"No! Besides I'm nearly unkillable anyways." Suddenly I hear a music playing in the hallway. "I'll talk to you later Wade, might be a little busy."

"Okay, man. Have fun on your job!" He said as we hang up and I began investigating through the cameras and noticed the bunny is in hallway close to me so I shut the door and the duck is in the east hall.

"Wow that duck reminds me of Miley Cyrus with her mouth out like that." So I posted the pic of it saying #duckycyrus on my Twitter account bloodedfuckr and so far I got likes from Sai, Nicholas, Damion and Deadpool. "Sometimes I love the Internet."

"Man, focus! You're low on power!" My chibi self said, worryingly. "I don't want to experience the discomfort of being stuffed inside the bear costume!" Then suddenly power went out and my chibi conscious self freaked out and pooled out of here. I got off my chair and hear a different music playing nearby and Freddy's face lit up.

I'm readying my blood bolts and then the bell tolled as the clock turned 6. "Well that was fun!" I said, leaving the office and flipping off Freddy. "I have a feeling that this is going to be a long week."