A/N: This story's a little more risqué than what I usually write (because, you know, I usually write), but not enough to be rated M. Rating this M would probably be more misleading anyway.

"You installed a fully functional sink into the clubroom overnight."

No action of Haruhi Suzumiya's was complete without Kyon incredulously summarizing said action after it was done.

"I know what you're thinking," Haruhi said. "But there was no selfish motivation behind this whatsoever!"

"Fair enough," Kyon said, "but I still have no idea how you managed this in one night."

"Because we needed it!" Haruhi said. "Think about it: Mikuru serves us delicious tea every day, and the teacups are always clean again the next day! What, did you think fairies came in every night and washed them?"

"Did you?" Kyon said.

"Originally," she admitted quietly. "But that's not what happens! What happens is Mikuru takes every one of them home and washes them by hand, day after day! As soon as I found out, I knew something had to be done!"

"And when did you find out?" Kyon asked.

"Three in the morning," she said casually. "And if it were a moment later, Mikuru would have had to endure another day of carrying all that china home!"

Although Mikuru's response to all this was very simple, she didn't have a chance to say it until that moment.

"Um… Thank you, Miss Suzumiya. I'll be sure to make good use of it."

"Not a problem!" Haruhi gave her a thumbs-up gesture. "Also… Next time you see Tsuruya, could you tell her we kind of owe someone what's kind of a lot of money? And if she asks about this 'someone', tell her they kind of insist on remaining anonymous for kind of legal reasons."

Mikuru nodded hesitantly while Yuki looked up meaningfully from the book she was reading.

Once brigade "activities" were finally over, the majority of the group returned home, save for Yuki, who continued reading, and Mikuru, who began to wash the dishes as promised. Because she'd already gained so much experience at home, she had no real difficulty, but one new factor suddenly changed this.

"I would like to assist you."

Mikuru turned and looked at Yuki, wondering why she would make such an offer but accepting the offer nonetheless. After simply telling her she could proved to be too difficult, she simply moved to one side, allowing Yuki to stand next to her.

This shouldn't take too long, Mikuru thought. Miss Nagato's skilled at all kinds of things, and if even I can do this without a problem, then she…

"Oh…"

Mikuru's head instantly turned in the direction of the sound. From Yuki Nagato, "oh" could easily have meant "I have moments to live".

But what Mikuru saw was decidedly less panic-inducing than what she'd imagined. All she saw was Yuki holding an upside-down teacup and staring at it as though it were a newly discovered mineral. However, on closer inspection, Mikuru realized that the cup had once been full, until its contents found their way onto Yuki's shirt.

"I should probably be more careful," she said.

Mikuru didn't respond, as it would have been impolite to do so while turned away from Yuki. It took her a while for her distracted mind to realize that it was very difficult to wash the dishes while facing in that particular direction. Just as she was trying to come up with an excuse to leave, she felt a cold sensation moving down her back.

"It would appear that I am not very good at this," Yuki said.

Mikuru stood still, twitching slightly when the water reached certain parts of her body.

"I'm…" she said. "I think I'll sit down for a moment…"

Yuki looked somehow disappointed by this statement, and as Mikuru sat there she struggled to find an acceptable reason for this disappointment, she eventually concluded that Yuki was hoping to wash the dishes with Mikuru so that the two would become closer (as friends, of course).

While Mikuru was pondering all this, Yuki was thinking about Mikuru's butt.

Time passed, with Yuki washing the dishes slowly and carefully. Every now and again, she would turn around to check on Mikuru, who, after the briefest glimpse of Yuki's wet shirt, would quickly cover her eyes. But over time, the glimpses were gradually longer and longer, only to become shorter again when Mikuru realized that Yuki wasn't wearing a bra, but after that they eventually became longer again.

Over the next few minutes, Mikuru had some thoughts she wasn't entirely proud of. Dirty thoughts, made only dirtier by their association with such an innocent activity. Although she had a basic idea of the values of this time compared to the values of her own time, she found herself worrying that if somebody were to hear her current thoughts, she would be arrested on the spot.

She was thankful to finally have these thoughts interrupted, albeit briefly, when Yuki finished with the dishes, unfolded a chair, and sat next to her. As soon as all motion had stopped again, Mikuru's mind immediately returned to what she had begun to refer to in her head as "the forbidden zone", complete with some kind of ominous fanfare.

This is just too much, she thought. It's like someone else is taking control of my body… She sighed. …But I know these are my thoughts, and that just makes it all the more shameful.

Having heard the sigh, Yuki turned to look at her, with concern clearly visible on her face. This concern only increased when she saw the conflicted expression on Mikuru's face. It was clear that she was trying to resist a strong urge of some kind, but Yuki had no idea what that urge could have been.

Although neither one of them had any way of knowing what the other was thinking, Mikuru was wishing that Yuki did know of a solution while simultaneously wishing that her thoughts remained private. She even wished that she could hide what she was thinking from herself, but since there was nothing else to think about, the urge continued to grow until she began to suspect that if she ignored it for a moment longer, she would die.

Luckily, she managed to survive for a few more seconds, but during those seconds the urge was still growing until finally she surrendered herself. Immediately, Yuki noticed that the conflict she saw in Mikuru earlier was gone, but before she had any time to be relieved, she understood what Mikuru's urge was.

On that day, Mikuru Asahina set a record. She was the first person to ever leave Yuki Nagato completely dumbfounded.

"Was that… a kiss?"

Mikuru took some time to consider her simple answer of "yes", but this consideration was cut short when she noticed Yuki's expectant stare, which lead to a rather hasty answer.

"I'm… not sure," she said.

It was then that another record was set by Mikuru. In just a few seconds, she became the first person to ever make Yuki Nagato smile.

"Perhaps you should do it again," she said playfully. "Several times, just so we can be sure of our answer."

After a short pause, Mikuru nodded slowly. "That sounds like a good idea."

Nearly an hour later, the two finally reached a definitive conclusion: If it wasn't a kiss to begin with, it certainly became one halfway through the "testing".

They also concluded that anything that happened after that halfway point was certainly more than just a kiss.

A/N: This story's title comes from a promotional sign or something I saw outside a local restaurant. I saw it as a challenge, and I challenged it by writing this.

I'm actually tempted to do this with as many pairings from other series as I can think of.