Of Truth & Lies
Justin stood facing Ethan after the trick who had showed up unannounced at the door left, but not before he had given the dark haired musician the red roses he had been nursing in his hands during the awkward confrontation in the apartments door way.
The dozen beautiful red blooms were now in Justin's hands. He was holding the stems so tightly that the thorns pierced the skin of his palms and fingers, causing him to bleed. Justin didn't notice the blood or the pain, he was too riled up to notice. Ethan's dark eyes saw trickles of crimson on Justin's pale skin.
" I want to be with someone who only wants to be with me, with someone forever." Justin spat the words out, mockingly at his lover. " What a fucking crock of shit that was."
" I meant it, Justin. God. Look at what you're doing to your hands." Ethan said, taking a step towards the artist, who in turn backed a step away. " Don't touch me." Justin bit out. " It doesn't matter anyway."
" Of course it does. Let me see..." Another step forward taken, another was taken back.
" Just fucking leave my hands alone, Ethan Gold, you bastard." A flushed Justin Taylor sneered between gritted teeth. " You fucking lied to me over that trick, saying that he was a music student and wanted to pick your brains. More like fuck your brains out. You must have been good to get a bouquet of red roses this size! "
" I know Justin. I know. I'm sorry. It..." Ethan tried to explain his actions of the night, Justin jumped straight in to stop him from saying any more.
" Don't give me that fucking, 'it didn't mean nothing to me' bullshit, Ethan. That's so laughably, so pathetically lame, I'm not even gonna comment on it. Try something else." Justin growled as he ripped the roses apart, uncaring of the damage he was doing to his already blooded hands.
" It's true. It didn't. I was fucking lonely in that hotel room without you. I was missing you.." Justin's eyes widened on hearing that. " So it's my fault now, is it? That you couldn't go without me, for one fucking night, without picking up some, some drooling admirer? " Justin snorted then threw some rose heads at him. The other man did nothing to shield himself. He knew that there was no using in hiding it. What's done, was done. He had to come clean over his actions. " I'm sorry Justin. It's been the one and only time that I've done it. I love you..."
Justin cut him off again. " Don't you dare say that. Don't you dare say those three words to me." Justin's blue eyes glittered, not only with anger, but with tears. " If it's true that you so called love me, why, just why did you do it? Aren't I good enough for you? That you need to fuck some one else? " Justin took the necessary steps to be face to face with Ethan.
" Tell me. Did he kneel at your feet and worship your huge talent? Did he marvel at your magnificent fingering? And the way you stroke your bow leave him breathless? " Justin made his point by using his hands to emphasize words. " Justin, for fucks shake. I've done it the one time to you. What about that bastard, Kinney, that you left for me? And all the fucking he done right in front of you? " Ethan snapped at Justin.
As soon as the last word had left Ethan's mouth, Justin slapped him across the face, leaving a smear of blood behind on the stunned violinist. " Don't you fucking dare bring Brian into this conversation." Justin's eyes flared, he pointed an angry finger at Ethan. " He has nothing to do with it."
" Yes he does, Justin. Why can't you forgive me after what Kinney done to you? What's the fucking difference? " Ethan yelled, rubbing his stinging cheek. " It was one stupid mistake."
" Well, that's fucking easy, Ethan. He never promised me anything. That's the difference. You did. And, boy, did I ever fall for your bullshit! Brian called me a dreamy eyed school boy when I told him that you loved me and I was all that you ever wanted. He couldn't believe that line was still being used today. " He turned on his heel and made for the door. " I wish that I had listened to Brian now! " He tossed over his shoulder. " At least I truly knew what I was getting from him, right from the very start! "
" You can't leave me, Justin. I need you. I can't live without you." Ethan pleaded as he chased after Justin. It made Justin stop in his tracks and turn to look at his soon to be ex. " You'll survive. You don't need me, Ethan. You have your music. That's the one and only true love of your life. And as for being your muse, I'm more than certain that there'll be another one soon that'll fill my shoes just as good, if not even better."
Justin yanked the ring that seem to be burning his flesh off his finger and slammed it down on the nearest flat surface. It felt good for it to be off there now. It had never felt right for it to be there from the beginning. " I'm done. You can give that to the next dreamy eyed muse! "
Justin carried on towards the door, grabbing a coat as he left. A weight had been lifted off his shoulders, making him feel lighter and freer for the first time in weeks. " I'm going to stay at Daphne's. I'll collect my things in the morning." Were the last words Justin said before closing the door on their relationship and leaving for his friends place. Maybe between them, they could come up with a plan to get Justin back into Brian's life. Where he belonged.