Batman, Pokemon, Naruto and X-Files crossover
WARNING: PURE CRACK!
I don't own anything... :( ... ok, scratch that. I own Tony.
~~~~~~~~Konoha
Tenten woke up about 6 a.m. Well, you would probably say this is early in the morning, but she damn overslept.
Her teammates are gonna kill her. Yeah, alright... only one of them. But he was definitely enough...
It was too late anyways, so she decided to do everything extra slow.
When she finally arrived the training area, everyone was already there.
They were only waiting for her. GREAT.
Tenten: Hey guys, what a nice morning! Did you all sleep well?
Neji: Hn. You're late.
Tenten: -_-" … yeah, I know.
~~~~~~~~Cerrulean City
James: *to Toni * I need to know that guy!
Jessie: *comes in * Hey, Wassup? I herd u liek Mudkipz!
Tony: Great! You're here! ...Argh. Your boyfriend is all emo again...
James: +to Jessie * Hey, we have to find them!
Jessie: Them? I thought it was only one...
James: Huh? Erm... yeah right. I'm confused. … wait... maybe I'm not...
Jessie: ehm... yeah. So... who do you wanna meet?
James: They call him the Joker... *mysterious smile *
~~~~~~~~~Konoha
Naruto: He's there!
Sakura: SASUKE! 3
Naruto: -_-" No. … I was talking about Batman. … I GOTTA MEET HIM!
Sakura: TT TT
~~~~~~~~Konoha
Jessie: What are we doing HERE? Where is HERE anyways? I thought you
wanted to meet the Joker!
James: I got secret information. He is here. I can sense him...
Jessie: o.O"
~~~~~~~still Konoha
Scully: Why did I agree to spend my holydays her e with YOU of all people?
Mulder: Don't ask me. I unno. Maybe cuz you like me...?
Scully: The only thing I liek are Mudkipz.
Mulder: ?
~~~~~~Konoha market
Batman: The Joker is here. I can sense him! Follow me!
Rachel: * pant, pant * NO!
Batman: Why not?
Rachel: I need to rest!
Batman: I am the goddamn Batman, you have to listen to me!
Rachel: Forget it! I'm leaving. *leaves *
Batman: *pout * Do what you want! The goddamn Batman will not lose his pride!
*loses his pants *
Citizens: * stare*
~~~~~~~Konoha market
Naruto: Aaah! Look, Sakura! It's Batman!
Sakura: * unsure* ehm... he... he lost his pants...
Naruto: yeah. Shall I imitate him?
Sakura: NO! * get out her phone and starts dialing a number*
~~~~~~~~Training grounds
Tentens phone: * ring, ring*
Neji: * surpressed anger*
Tenten: Sorry, I gotta answer this. … Hey Sakura! ...What?Who is in town? ...Really?
...And he lost his...? …. *goes on talking *
Neji: Women. …... * gets suddenly knocked out from James*
James: *to Jessie * That will make the Joker appear!
Jessie: I don't get it.
James: You don't need to.
Jessie: … did you take drugs or something?
James: ...NO. ….. So... we gonna kidnap that boy.
Jessie: I don't get it.
James: Whatever.
Jessie: *notices still babbling Tenten * … What about his girlfriend?
James: ...well, she got stuff to do. *shrugs *
~~~~~~~~Konoha market
Naruto: OMG! It really IS Batman! I'm your biggest fan!
Batman: *proud smile * Wait... I lost my pants in public...
Naruto: Awesome!
Batman: ?
Naruto: Everything you do is awesome!
Batman: ….. COOL, MAN.
Naruto: yeah!
Sakura: *facepalm *
Scully: * is irritated by so much stuff to buy*
Mulder: Hey, Scully, look at this! That guy lost his pants! * LOL*
Scully: OK, that's it. It's enough, I'm leaving.
Mulder: NO! Wait! Don't leave me! I was just making fun of …... BATMAN?
Scully: Riiiiight... and E.T. Just comes around that corner...
Mulder: WHERE?
Scully: *facepalm * *leaves *
Mulder: Hey, wait! What about our holidays? Scully? LOOK! MUDKIPZ! …
Hey, wait for me!
~~~~~~~~~~Konoha market
Great. Rachel had no Idea where she was. Goddamn Batman. She had to go back to him. He seemed to be the only one who had a clue.
CRASH!
Great. Now she even ran into someone.
Scully: OUCH.
Rachel: Oh my god. I'm so sorry! I was just searching for my idiot...erm friend.
Mulder: Scully, you can't just leave me alone! I'm sure I will...
James: *from a rooftop * LOOK! WE KIDNAPPED THAT BOY! ANYONE WHO WANTS TO JOIN US OR RESCUE HIM SHALL FOLLOW US! *runs away *
Jessie: *pant, pant * He IS on drugs!
Tenten: *meanwhile reached the market * Ayiiiiieh! Tjey kidnapped Neji, we gotta
follow them!
Sakura: … Forget it. He'll never come back. Just like Sasuke... TT TT *sob *
Naruto: Riight... I see it as a mission. AAAAND … The goddamn Batman is coming
with me!
Batman: *cries * MY GODDAMN BATMAN PANTIES!
Rachel: Oh. There he is.
Mulder: Well, it's not an X-File...
Scully: but it's still crime! We gotta follow them!
Mulder: But what about our holidays?
Orochimaru: *suddenly appears out of nowhere * Wow. They are crazy.
Kabuto: You look pretty today, Orochimaru-saa...
Orochimaru: o.O" *slowly moving away from Kabuto *
~~~~~~~~~~~Konoha woods
James: * pant, pant*
Jessie: So, what is it about that kidnapping anyway?
Neji: HN.
Jessie: Uh Oh.
James: Have no fear, honey! What could he possibly do to us anyway?
~~~~~~~~~~~Konoha woods
Everyone else arrives.
Scully: FBI! Drop your weapons!
Neji: *drops knife *
Jessie+James: *are bound to a tree *
Mulder: LOL. They got their asses kicked!
Jessie: *grunts *
Naruto: Wow, hey Neji, you kicked their asses!
Mulder: *to Naruto * That's what I jst said...
Sakura: *punches Naruto in the face * Idiot!
Batman: Yeah! Salute me! Batman comes to rescue!
Rachel: He IS already rescued!
Batman: … Oh... yeah. *pouts *
Sakura: Naruto, your hero is a crybaby.
Naruto: Shut up, he's cool. *pouts *
Tenten: NEJI YOU'RE ALIVE!
Joker: *appears out of nowhere * … *looks Team Rocket *
… wow. You two are pathetic.
Jessie: *grunts *
Joker: Why so serious?
James: *with cool voice * Hey,man. We are here for u!
Joker: Aha. You're … WHAT?
Scully: Mulder! We have to arrest them!
Mulder: Huh? Uh yeah. Right.
Orochimaru: Stop it! We will be doing this!
Kabuto: Yeah! Listen to my master! 3
Orochimaru: Stop doing that Kabuto!
Batman: Batman likes the strangers! We shall trust them!
Naruto: Yeah, Batman, whatever you say. Let's trust them!
Sakura: WHAT? Are you insane? They kidnapped Sasuke!
Naruto: …. Batman is much hotter than Sasuke ever was.
Sakura: WTF?
Batman: Thank you, buddy.
Naruto: LOL. No problem.
Meanwhile Kabuto, Orochimaru, the Joker, And Team Rocket escaped, and for some reason no-one noticed.
As Neji realized that Batman lost his panties, he laughed at him and afterwards they realized that the criminals were gone. S o they decided to go backto the market, while
Neji and tenten stayed behind.
~~~~~~~~~Konoha market
Ino: So? What now?
Scully:We gonna follow them. OK, Mulder, we will... Mulder? Where are you?
Mulder: Wow, it's beautiful. How much do you want for it?
Shop owner: 300 Yen.
Mulder: whew. I only have dollars...
Shop owner: Oh, that's alright.
Mulder: Cool. So how much is it in Dollars?
Shop owner: *mysterious smirk * 3000.
Mulder: Well... I'm not sure if I can afford this...
Scully: *comes from behin * Mulder, what are you doing?
Mulder: *jumps in shock *
Scully: come on. We gotta arrest the Joker and his company.
Mulder: what about our holidays?
Scully: -_-"
Mulder: Alright, alright. I wanted to buy that bracelet for you. But if you don't want
it, fine. Be that way. But don't think you will get a Mudkip from me on your
next birthday. *pouts *
Scully: *sigh *
They both leave.
Shop owner: Come back soon! *waves *
Tony: *arrives market * *sees Batman, laughs at him *
Batman: WHY DOES NO-ONE RESPECT ME? *pouts *
Naruto: *to Sakura * … We should really go buy Batman new Bat-Pants.
Sakura: Yeah. Or he just pulls them up again.
Batman+Naruto: *realization * OOOOOOOOHHHH...
Batman: *pulls his pants up again * *smiles * How warm...
Ino: *facepalm *
Batman: Where's Rachel?
Naruto: I unno.
Tony: HEY! Did you even realise I was there?
Sakura: Hey, where does this guy come from?
Tony: A simple „NO" would have been enough...
...Anyways. I'm searching fo my niece.
Naruto: Sorry, we didn't see anyone.
~~~~~~~~~~~~Konoha woods
James: OMG! I'm your biggest fan!
Joker: Be gone!
James: Could you teach me something? Pretty please?
Joker : BE GONE!
James: Hey, listen how about this...
Joker: PISS OFF!
Jessie: WILL YOU TWO JUST SHUT UP BEFORE I GO NUTS AND KILL
YOU?
Guys: *shocked by random outburst, shut up*
Orochimaru: Where are we?
Kabuto: … I have no idea. Should we go home?
Orochimaru: Good idea. We got stuff to do.
Kabuto: *pouts * but I thought about some private time...
Orochimaru: Eeeeeeewwwwwww. Gross. Stop doing this or you're fired!
Kabuto: … TT TT
Bush: *shudder *
Everyone turns around and sees Scully cursing while trying to get out out of the bushes... followed by Rachel.
James: Wut?
Scully:DROP YOUR WEAPONS!
Joker: *looks at her * ...No.
Scully: What?
Mulder: *arrives * pant,pant... God, Scully you're much too fast...
Scully: *didn't notice her partner * DROP YOUR F!§%#*ING WEAPONS!
Mulder: *drops gun *
Scully: *turns around *
Joker: *laughs at Mulder * ...lol. What an idiot.
Mulder: *picks up gun and throws it at the Joker who gets kncked out...instantly. it hurt. *
James: Hah! Serves you right for not wanting to teach me! ...lol. What an idiot.
Jessie: Oh holy Jashin, he is STILL imitating that guy...
Mulder: * picks up gun again and throws it. this time at James. ... who gets also knocked out.*
Jessie: *is totally mad cuz that police guy knocked out her boyfriend... and slowly (dangerously) approaches the agents*
Scully: Don't get any closer!
Mulder: Hey, why don't we just wait what she's up t-
Jessie: *does the chuck norris roundhousekick on them* *gets hair outta her face*
Rachel: ... o.O
Jessie: wow. so...all four of them are unconcious. Pretty funny day.
Tony: Haiyeeeeeah! I FINJALLY FOUND YOU!
Rachel: WHAT!
Tony: Not you. My niece. *points at Jessie* HER!
Jessie: What... What exactly are you DOING here? Why did you search for me?
Tony: Because of HIM! *points at James* I can't trust your life to HIM! He's acting freaking crazy lately... I'm so happy you're still alive... 3 *hugs her*
Jessie: ...o.O
Rachel: Whew. I got to know many freaky people lately...
James: Ugh.. What the-
Tony: *knocks out James*
Jessie: ...soo... WHY exactly did you do this?
Tony: That was revenge for him risking your life. call me crazy, but I thought I saw a couple of NINJAS on my way here. I must be going insane...
Jessie: wait, wait... he didn't risk my-
Tony: Shush! And who's that? huh? *points at Joker*
Jessie: Oh come on he is his idol so-
Tony: Shut up. You come with me. Were going home and we will leave this IDIOT here.
Jessie: B-but uncle Tony... he is lost without me. He wouldn't even find out of this forest alone...
Tony: Do you really think I care?
*discussion goes on*
Rachel: *sigh* .
~~~~~~~~~~Konoha woods
Sakura: I don't wanna. Let's go home.
Batman: NO! WE HAVE TO SEARCH FOR RACHEL AND YOU WILL COME WITH US! LISTEN TO THE GODDAMN BATMAN!
Naruto: Yeah. You heard him.
Sakura: Yer all idiots. ALL!
Bushes: *shudder*
Naruto: Ayiiieeeeh! A ghost!
Tenten: *comes out of the bushes*
Naruto: Oooooohh... it's just you... lol.
Neji: *appears right behind Naruto* BOO!
Naruto: Ayiiiieeeeehh! *jumps in shock*
Batman: OH MY GOD! YOU SCARED TE BATMAN!
Sakura: .
Tenten: Hey, who's that freak?
Batman: I'M THE GODDAMN BATMAN!
Neji: uh huh. ...Have you been searching for us?
Naruto: No. We're searching for Batman friend.
Tenten: Can we come with you?
Naruto: NO!
Sakura: Yes.
Tenten: Thank you!
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This is my first story and I don't really know if I should go on or not... (your opinion?) ...;)