Three Ways To Need You 3: To Be Near Her

by aolurker

To Be Near Her: Need manifests in the physical, but has its basis in the emotional. Third in a series of three unrelated vignettes and though an author should never say something like this, my favorite of the three, :- .

Title: Three Ways To Need You, Part 3
Author: aolurker
Disclaimer: I do not own SVU or these characters (darn it!) nor am I making any money off them (darn it!). No infringement intended.
Fandom: Law and Order: SVU
Pairing: Alex/Olivia
Rating: M
Summary: Need manifests in the physical, but has its basis in the emotional. The third in a series of three unrelated vignettes.
Notes: For mature audiences only! And though as an author I'm not supposed to choose, I think this one is my favorite of the three.

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Three Ways To Need You, Part 3

They had been playful, giggling and joking, even, before they'd gotten interrupted by the call; before Olivia had had to bundle up and head out to a scene.

Alex had been left a little wound up and a lot unsatisfied. She had watched Olivia get dressed and accepted a last kiss from her before the detective headed out to do her duty. She glanced at the clock on the bedside table. 9:07 pm. She flopped back onto the bed and inhaled deeply. There was no telling when Olivia would be back tonight or even if she'd be back at all.

Exhaling on a resigned sigh, Alex hauled herself off the bed and into a robe. She might as well get that little bit of work done now rather than in the morning and hope it was a short outing for Olivia.

However, by 11:30 those hopes had been dashed, she was done with her work, and her eyelids were getting heavier and heavier. It was time to call it a night. She returned to the bedroom, sadly empty and lonely and still unsatisfied, and donned a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt to sleep in. Ducking under the covers of their bed, she fell asleep quickly, a small smile flitting across her lips as her last thoughts lingered on the moments before Olivia's earlier departure.

When she awoke it was to the sound of the shower going off. Olivia must be back; showering was the first thing the detective always did upon her return. Alex looked at the clock again and saw that she'd been asleep for just over three hours. Not wanting to fall back asleep yet, wanting to see Olivia first, she laid her head back down and waited, that small smile flitting across her lips again.

It was only a few minutes later that Olivia padded into the room in a tank top and light sweats, her hair still damp from her shower. Even in the dim light of the New York night Alex could see her well enough, well enough at least, to know that something wasn't quite right. And she could read her well enough, too, well enough to know that it must have been a rough one; it must have been a bad scene. All thoughts of earlier that evening, all thoughts of herself, left Alex's head immediately and overwhelming tenderness took over.

Either sensing Alex's eyes on her or hoping Alex's eyes were on her or just wanting to look, Olivia glanced over at Alex as well, and when she saw the blonde was awake and looking back, she made her way over to Alex's side of the bed rather than her own. Silently, she sat down on the edge of the bed next to Alex's form and looked at Alex's face, full of love and compassion.

Olivia's own face held a mix of emotions: sorrow, weariness; her eyes dark. She reached out and ran the tips of her fingers along the long planes of Alex's face, starting at the blonde's hairline, past her temple, down her jaw. Her lips parted and she blinked slowly; worn, exhausted, tired, so very tired, but not wanting to sleep, not yet.

So instead Olivia just sat there on the edge of the bed. Just... just wanting to be near her. Near Alex. Near her, close to her, with her. And just wanting to see her; her beauty, her purity. See and feel the warmth of her gaze, see and feel the warmth of her love.

Alex willingly, patiently, accepted Olivia's silence and her touch as watched Olivia watch her. Watched Olivia's gaze wander over her face, from her eyes to her cheeks to her lips; watched the myriad of thoughts play across the detective's face. When Olivia's eyes came back up to meet Alex's once again, Alex could see the tumbling stew of emotions.

And see the need.

Alex swallowed hard and scooted over while holding the sheet up, her invitation, her wish, obvious; wanting only for Olivia to join her, to bring their bodies together, to touch and be touched. Hearing and understanding everything Olivia wasn't saying.

Never breaking eye contact, Olivia did as Alex had silently requested, and got into the bed, under the sheet next to Alex. Lying now face to face with the blonde, Olivia let the backs of her fingers play across Alex's features again.

When Olivia's fingers reached her chin, Alex brought her own hand up to capture Olivia's, bringing the detective's fingers to her lips and just holding them there. Then using her thumb to open Olivia's hand, she finally broke eye contact when she closed her yes and brought Olivia's palm to her lips and kissed it. Then kissed it again. Opening her eyes, she started at Olivia's pinky, guiding each of Olivia's fingers, one by one, to her lips, placing a gentle, chaste kiss on the tip of each of them. After kissing Olivia's index finger, Alex let her eyes slide shut again as she brought the pad of Olivia's thumb to her lips. She then placed a soft kiss on it before capturing the end of it in her mouth and using her tongue and lips to slowly, soothingly, tenderly suck, lick, and caress it.

After several long moments of laving attention on Olivia's thumb, Alex opened her eyes to see Olivia's mouth hanging slightly open and her attention on the actions of Alex's mouth. With a last kiss, she released Olivia's thumb from her mouth and just held Olivia's hand, waiting for Olivia to meet her gaze, knowing she'd be able to tell from that what Olivia wanted.

And when Olivia did look up, Alex saw the shining in Olivia's eyes and the slight dilation of her pupils and knew. She used the grip she still had on Olivia's hand to push the weary detective over, rolling her onto her back. And got confirmation that her course of action was correct when Olivia didn't resist, when she simply allowed herself to be pushed back and allowed Alex to perch over her on an elbow.

Alex continued to stare down at the amazing woman below her for long, long seconds, studying her face as Olivia studied hers, the fingers on her bottom hand combing through Olivia's hair, the fingers on the hand that still held Olivia's also not idle. For she intertwined them with Olivia's fingers and thumb, weaving them together, turning and twisting and moving slowly, tangling and untangling them in no pattern, no rhythm, bringing them over and around and through each other in every way possible, symbolic of her emotions for the woman that stared back at her. Hoping Olivia was reading everything in her expression that she wanted her to, believing Olivia was, knowing she was.

Feeling her eyes start to shimmer, seeing the same in Olivia's, Alex's lips fell just slightly open and she leaned down to place a whisper of a kiss, a mere brushing of her parted lips, just below Olivia's right eye, before placing the ridge of her eyebrow against Olivia's, rubbing her nose back and forth so slowly, so gently against Olivia's before stilling completely, their lips millimeters apart but not touching.

They stayed like that, in unmoving closeness, listening and feeling each other's measured inhales and exhales, not needing a kiss, not needing words, needing only to breathe the same air between them, needing only each other's presence.

But Alex couldn't remain still for long as her heart ached more and more with emotion, emotion she wanted to express, emotions she needed to express. Emotions she wanted Olivia to see through her actions, emotions she needed Olivia to feel through her touch.

So Alex pulled away and sat up fully next to the detective's hip, letting the sheet slide off her shoulder. With both hands she grabbed the bottom of her shirt and slowly pulled it up and over her head, her lithe form shimmying and stretching with the action, her hair cascading back down over her shoulders, her upper body revealed to Olivia.

Olivia had watched it all raptly; watched Alex's hands go to her shirt, watched the shirt be lifted and skin exposed and her eyes now roamed over Alex's torso, the flat plane of her stomach, her belly button, up higher to linger on the soft, pale skin of her breasts, the light pink of her small nipples. Alex let her look, tracing a hand along Olivia's jaw and then continuing down Olivia's neck and chest as Olivia continued to stare. Finally, when her hand reached the bottom of Olivia's shirt, it was joined by her other hand and she used them to start pushing Olivia's shirt up slowly. And up further, caressing skin as she did.

With the brunette's help, she got Olivia's shirt up and off and tossed aside like her own. Both now naked from the waist up, Alex moved to straddled the detective, sitting on Olivia's hips, her knees on either side of Olivia's body, with Olivia resting her hands on Alex's thighs.

Olivia looked up from below, looking not at Alex's bare chest, not at her breasts, but once again into those endlessly blue eyes. And as Alex stared back down, she saw the silent request, the silent plea in her lover's brown ones. The arousal was obvious and undeniable. But there was also so very much more: all those emotions Alex wanted and needed to express, Olivia wanted and needed Alex to express them. She wanted and needed Alex to make her feel. To make her forget. To make her remember.

Tonight wasn't about sex. Tonight was about contact and connection. About feelings and emotions. About beauty and affirmation and cleansing.

And so Alex continued to hold Olivia's gaze as she ran both hands up and down Olivia's abdomen. Lightly caressing, lightly awakening. Starting at Olivia's stomach with her thumbs pointed in, her fingers splayed outwards over impossibly soft skin stretched over taut muscle, Alex moved her hands higher, lower, over, tracing each of Olivia's lower ribs, brushing past the undersides of her breasts, thumbs pressing slightly into Olivia's stomach, fingers gripping and holding Olivia's sides gently, communicating with that grip the adoration, the barely restrained disbelief that this body below her was hers and hers to cherish, and cherish it she did. The wonder of it, the bliss it brought her.

Finally breaking eye contact, Alex watched her hand as she laid it on Olivia's chest, in the valley between the detective's breasts feeling air move in and out of Olivia's lungs, feeling her chest rise and fall with several breaths before lifting her hand so that only two fingers were touching Olivia's skin. She then slowly dragged those two fingers down the middle of Olivia's chest, down her sternum, to her stomach, that so very wonderfully flat stomach, where the skin fluttered with the beat of Olivia's heart. Alex then flattened her whole hand over that spot, covering the expanse from Olivia's stomach to just under her left breast where the detective's heart steadily beat, strongly beat, comfortingly beat, below her hand. She just held it there for a moment, looking at it, staring at it, concentrating, synchronizing her breathing with Olivia's, believing their heartbeats were synchronizing, as well.

Alex wasn't sure how long she'd been just holding her hand there, lost, mesmerized in that moment, when Olivia's hand moved to cover her own.

Alex immediately and instinctively turned her hand over, away from the skin of Olivia's body to the skin of Olivia's palm, taking hold of Olivia's hand. And with just the slightest tug on Alex's hand, Olivia communicated her desires to Alex.

Alex obliged, leaning over and finally for the first time since Olivia had gotten home, brought their lips together. Olivia's hands tangled gently through Alex's hair, cradling her head. Not trying to direct the kiss, only wanting the feel of the silky strands through her fingers as their tongues danced out to meet each other; sliding over and around the other, not a battle for supremacy, but a gentle meeting and melding of equals.

There was no rush, no urgency, no escalation in their actions as they continued the familiar exploration of each other's mouths, loving the feel of each other's tongues and pliable lips, the quiet sounds of the kiss and their breathing the only sounds in the room.

Minutes later, Alex pulled out of the kiss and once again held herself above Olivia. The detective pushed a few strands of blonde hair from the attorney's face so they could see each other again, drink in each other's gazes again. After a moment, more unspoken words exchanged, and Alex arched her back slightly, pressing and rubbing her breasts against Olivia's. The answering exhale and tiny widening of Olivia's eyes communicated more of Olivia's needs and desire. Alex further lowered her body towards Olivia, pressing and rubbing their chests together as she placed another quick kiss on her placid lover's lips, her chin, the pulse point of her neck. Then slowly scooting backwards, she moved further down Olivia's body.

Straddling now one of the brunette's partially splayed legs, arms and elbows still on either side of Olivia's torso, Alex used her mouth to rain love upon Olivia's upper body. She cradled one of Olivia's breasts in her hands as she feathered it with kisses, so gently, so tenderly, treating it as the precious, amazingly fragile thing that in this moment it was until finally closing her mouth around the nipple and suckling it softly.

She circled the nipple over and over and over again with her tongue, attending to it, teasing it, loving it. At the same time, her other hand palmed Olivia's other breast, a light massage, a tightening of her grip, her fingers occasionally focusing, rolling and playing with the nipple, feeling both nubbins now puckering and hardening under her gentle but insistent touch.

Throughout it all, Alex tilted and rolled her pelvis, using the top of her pelvic bone to press down onto Olivia's core. The excitement again was of a sexual nature but the point was simply to feel good, feel pleasure, feel love, feel. So more minutes passed by while Alex continued to glide over and move against and make love to Olivia's body with her own, doing everything she could to show it and show Olivia how she felt.

Finally, Alex felt Olivia's hand gently touched her hair. She looked up to find Olivia looking back at her. And she knew Olivia had been watching her the whole time.

And by the look in her eyes, she also knew what Olivia was asking for.

With a small smile touching her lips, she crawled back up Olivia's body and again kissed her deeply. Without breaking that kiss, Alex shifted off Olivia onto her side next to the detective again, perched on her hip and her elbow, her top leg slightly bent and resting on one of Olivia's legs. She then used the hand on her upper arm to traced once again down Olivia's torso. But this time she didn't stop at the puckered flesh of Olivia's nipples or the fluttering of her heart beat or the soft skin of her abs, but continued lower, past the small sensitive area around her navel, lower, under the loose elastic of Olivia's sweat pants, lower, below the band of her panties, lower, finally encountering warm, moist flesh.

Olivia gasped at the long awaited for intimate contact and broke the kiss, opening her eyes and looking directly into Alex's, and into her soul. Alex pulled back from Olivia, holding those eyes steady, and dipped her fingers ever lower, gathering needed moisture before coming back up to the top of Olivia's sex.

Slick fingers rubbed gently next to, around, and over Olivia's clit. Alex brought the hand on the arm she was leaning on up and around so that while her elbow could still support her, her fingers could play through the short strands of hair on Olivia's forehead, while the fingers on the other hand played through Olivia's folds.

Alex's fingers dipped once again to gather further moisture then once again resumed their task. Olivia's mouth dropped open and Alex could tell she was getting close. Olivia's eye's slid shut and a small frown formed as she concentrated on the feelings that were building, not powerfully, but inexorably, in her core, in her very being.

Alex leaned down one more time. She kissed Olivia's cheek and a closed eye, then her open lips before slipping her tongue into Olivia's waiting and willing mouth as she began to rub Olivia just a little bit quicker, a little bit surer, a little bit firmer.

Olivia, for her part, was awash in Alex. Alex's hand tangling in her hair, Alex's tongue in her mouth, Alex's breast and nipple pressing into her own, the weight of Alex's knee over hers, Alex's toes playing along the top of her foot, and Alex's fingers stroking her so assuredly, so expertly, so exquisitely, so beautifully, so intimately. So lovingly.

And ultimately it was that full body contact, that intimacy, that complete connection, that knowledge of love that was what pushed Olivia over the edge as much as the stroking of Alex's fingers. Her orgasm flowed over and through her, released on two quiet stuttering exhales into Alex's mouth as Alex's tongue continued to stroke hers, Olivia's legs and toes fluttering minutely, hands gripping and releasing Alex's hair rhythmically with the gentle rolling waves, the emotional connection in that moment deeper and more beautiful than the physical experience.

When Alex felt that Olivia's release had passed, felt Olivia's quiet shudders ease, and her breathing calm, Alex stilled the movement of her fingers on Olivia. She pulled out of their kiss to find a single tear had escaped out of the corner of her lover's eye. With a tender smile she wiped it away.

She then looked once again into Olivia's eyes, partially hidden now behind slowly blinking and obviously very heavy eyelids. As they had earlier in the evening, they just stared at each other, one of Alex's hands once again brushing through the hair at Olivia's forehead, over and over and over while her other hand still intimately connected them.

Olivia tried to stay awake, still just wanting to look at and be with Alex. But it was a losing battle. With each blink her lids drooped further and further, until they simply didn't reopen.

Content that her love was the last thing Olivia saw, the last thing she felt before falling asleep, Alex finally and carefully pulled her hand from Olivia's sweats and quickly wiped them on the sheet. She then reached over Olivia to her alarm clock, setting it for 30 minutes later than it had been originally set, before reaching down and grabbing the top sheet and light blanket, pulling them up, covering their bodies. Then with one last kiss on her sleeping lover's lips, she placed her hand once again over Olivia's heart, rested her head on the brunette's shoulder and fell asleep herself, not a word having been spoken between them since Olivia's return.

Not a word having been needed.