Stargate sg-1 is not mine.

It was a bright and

sunny day on the planet kal-lee-way in the beta quadrant of the milky way galaxy. well, as bright and sunny as a planet with a red sun can get, when the only peace of technology that still worked on the planet activated. The stargate on this planet hadnt been used since before the great battle on took place between the Anceints and the Furling. So to say the least, I was kinda surprised when three men and one woman stepped through the event horizon, even more so when the female(who use to be a host if my scans are right, damn parasites.) held up an Ancient scane-pad.

"Sir, Im picking up a faint power reading 65 feet from here, it looks like its behind that green boulder over there." The blonde female said, in human no less.

"How strong are the readings?" Asked a man with metal rings over his eyes.

"Enough to power the Daedalus for about six years straight." Said the female again.

"Well kids, there goes tonights hockey match, go check it out." Said another man with chin and biin colord hair.

About one hundred and thirty trillion nano-seconds later, the man with the metal rings over his eyes and the blonde female picked me up to have a look at me.

"What do you think it is?" The man sayed.

"Its not a metal statue head, I can tell you that much."

"How so?"

"Twenty-seven percent of the power I picked up back thare is coming from this thing". Ill give her one thing, shes pretty damn smart for such a pretty keen-bell.

"Then wheres the other eighty-something percent coming from?"

"Im guessing from that mosh coverd metal thing over there."

"Right, Ill drag it back to the gate for you."

"Right, thanks"

Six-teen minutes later the guy (whos name is Daniel from what ive gathered.) falls on his butt from dragging my metallic butt(and body) over to the gate, gasping for breath.

"How much does this thing way?" Daniel asks,..Sam, I think it was.

"About nine-hundred and thirty-seven ponds, IF Im reading this right."She says lieing to him, trying to make him fell Better. So, to correct her, and scare the crin out of them, I did the only thing I currently can do.

I opened my metal eye lids, showing my compeletly red glowing laser-eyes and said, vary calmly.

"Actually, without my head, my body ways approxmitly two-hundred and thirty-seven pounds." And very promptly, Daniel fainted into the arms of ones Tealc and Conel ONeill, and Sam dropped me to the stone ground around the stargate.

#1-chin-salt

#2-biin-pepper

#3-keen-military

#4-bell-Women

#5-crin-shit.

Okay, I know my spelling is shity-er thin crap, but please be gintle, its my first time.lol.-

STARGATE SG-1 IS NOT MINE, BUT THE METAL GUY AND THE PLANET AND ALIEN WORDS ARE!!