This is my first Noragami fic and my first attempt at brofics. I wrote this with platonic Yato x Yukine in mind (bromance) but you can think of it as whatever you want. Ugh my studies have been killing me and this was a great break. I'm still new in this so don't judge me too harshly. English is not my mother language so if there are any mistakes feel free to correct me. A review or two would be nice :3. Anyways on with the story
Disclaimer: I don't own Noragami or it's characters but the plot is mine.
You know how they say that after busy day you fall asleep soundly. I wish that was the case with me. It's just that sleep doesn't come as easily as it used to. Maybe I always had troubles with sleeping. But it doesn't matter now. I'm dead anyway. I turn in my bed again and again. Trying to fall asleep. But when I close my eyes darkness falls. It's funny, even miserable of me, I know but I can't help it. Darkness is ominous ,threatening, gruesome. At least to me. I feel vulnerable, hopeless in it. It drains every little bit of my energy. I didn't even notice that I was struggling for air till I almost choked. I opened my eyes so suddenly, but to what? Darkness again. I was on the edge of futon, almost falling down. The bed wasn't large to begin with.
*Sigh*
Just Yato. He scared the life out of me. It's not comforting when you hear strange noise in the middle of the night. Lucky him. Just see how he's sleeping so soundly. It's not him that has these problems. Fears
But it's kinda comforting you know. To hear someone near, to know that you're not alone. Of course I would never admit that, especially to him. He's has an enormous ego even without that. I should go back to sleep probably. If you can say "back". I don't want to sting my "dear" master. Again.
I was running. Again. Why am I always running. My legs start to ache. But the thing chasing me doesn't seem like it will stop. So I run again. Faster. And faster.
That's all I have left. That's all I can do. How pitiful.
You ask what am I running from. I don't know. But I know that's dark. Like dark dark. It haunts me even at my sleep. When I finally get to get rid of it. But no. Darkness follows me everywhere. Because I'm weak. And freaked out.
It seems like darkness is reaching out for me. With those tiny, scary hands. It grabs me. It drags me in nothingness. And I'm scared. I'm terrified. I'm a coward I know. But I can't think of it now. The dark. That's the only thing on my mind now. And how to escape it. Well it was on my mind, before. Now I know that I can't run from it. It's meaningless.
Than the scene shifts. It's still dark but I can see something.
It's Yato. What is he doing here.
"Yukine"
"Yes?" I get the courage to answer him
"Why are you so weak?"
"Wha…a…t?"
"You heard me. Why are you so weak. Why aren't you like her? Like Nora. She's so much stronger. And she wants to play. She isn't afraid to kill."
I try to look at his eyes but I see nothing. N…o….o. This isn't possible. Why Yato? Why. I'm so scared. Is this a punishment. For not being good enough. Why are you doing this to me. I thought we were friends? Weren't we huh? I know I am handful sometimes. Oh screw that I'm always but still. So are you. B-B-But I thought maybe, just maybe..
"She isn't afraid of dark Yukine. Maybe I should use her. I don't need a shinki as weak as you."
Why is this hurtng so much. Whyy? I thought I didn't care about him. Soon my face is wet. I move my hands to wipe tears that somehow formed. Another proof that I'm weak.
Than Hiyori appeared. She's here to help, right? Hiyori can't do anything bad to me ? She's Hiyori, right? It's in her, to help.
"You really are worthless you know Yukine?"
"Hiyori you too? Why are you doing this to me?"
" What? We're just telling the truth Yukine" and she laughs. But not with that comforting laugh of hers but with a maniac one. Like s..h…e's wicked, dire.
My all nightmares are coming true. I'm not like that right. I'm worth something, right? That can't be true, what they are talking. It's like I'm all alone, again. And I don't want to be alone. That feeling don't wanna feel it again, that agonizing pain. The pain that robs me of air, of my life itself.
"You know that they're right. C'mon, not even you can't be so stupid." Nora appears
"What do you want?" I scream. It seems that my voice hadn't betrayed me, yet. Wonder when it will.
"Me? Nothing. Just making sure that you got everything right. You're weak. You're worthless. Yato doesn't need a shikai like you. Hiyori doesn't need a friend like you. Don't you think that they would be better without you. Yato could actually do some work. Like God Of calamity like what he's supposed to do."
"Stop it. Stop saying those awful words." But the worst thing was that I believed her. I started to believe. What would happen if I just disappeared. They would be happier, right. They wouldn't have to take care of a weak, worthless being like me.
"OH but both me and you know that you know it's true." and with that she slashes me. I'm over. Right. IT hurts. I scream. After all I scream.
I'm scared, I'm terrified, I'm weak. IT would be best if I disappear. I'm broken, fragile, useless, a burden.
Without a warning I felt something on my cheek. A slap. So now they are gonna beat me. A fitting end to a creature like me.
"Yukine, Yukine wake up! " Yato screeches next to me.
"I'm awake you moron" I spit out. But I'm hardly holding back tears. No. I can't let him see me like this. Him of all persons. Those problems are my own. No one needs to know of them. But what if it's true what Nora said. That he would be better off without you.
"What happened?"
"Nothing of your business." I roll at the other side so that I don't need to face him. Since our futons are next each other it's hard to ignore him. Why the hell didn't I move them. If I did he wouldn't wake up and I wouldn't need to go through this.
Lies
"Was it another nightmare?" stubborn. He's stubborn.
"None of your business."
Harshly two strong hands roll me to other side. Facing Yato.
" C'mon Yukine tell me. I know something is off." Damn that 'sensory link'
"Oh I know. Do you want me to light the lights up." That's it. I knew it. He thinks I'm scared. Well I am but he doesn't need to put it that way.
"OH YES PLEASE. I KNOW I'M WEAK AND SCARED. THAT I'M AFRAID OF THE DARK. I KNOW IT. YOU DON'T NEED TO POINT IT OUT. WHY DO YOU EVEN KEEP ME. I AM WORTHLESS AND WEAK. THE WORS SHINKI THERE IS" and with that I broke. I didn't even notice that I was shaking. I just can't hold back the tears. I excepted some kind of answer. Or that Yato confirms It all.
*SLAP*
"Who told you all that stuff. Who told you all those lies. Was it In the nightmare? Was it? Tell me Yukine" He looks so angry. Is he angry with me or…?
"Just tell me Yukine, please. It will be easier, trust me." Why does he has to be so stubborn. Why do I have the urge to tell him. To spit it all out. To trust him. B-B-But it couldn't do any more damage, could it?
"Yes. You were there. A..and you told me that I'm worthless. Hiyori said that too. And Nora said that everyone would be better off without me." Suddenly Yato puts his hand on my head and ruffles my hair.
"You really are dense."
"How you think?"
"I would never say that. And Hiyori wouldn't either."
"But how can you be sure that you're not better off with her. She's stronger."
"You are my regalia. You are my blessed regalia. Yukine I would never say something like that. I told you I would protect you. I didn't gave up on you and neither did you on know you can tell me if anything is troubling you. Heck you turned for me. You don't know how happy I am to have such an amazing regalia"
That's it. I can't hold it back anymore. I broke up again. Tears just start to flow again. Ugh why am I such a Kid. B..but maybe that's better. It gives me the excuse to do this. And in the moment I hug him.I hug Yato. I don't know what has gotten into me. But I needed it. I needed someone to hold me. To warm me up. To make all my insecurities go away. A touch. Just a touch to ensure me that I'm human, as much as I can be.
"What's this Yukine? Someone's afraid?" I can hear the joke in his voice. It seems that all has gotten back to normal. Except my face. I fell it blushing madly.
"Shut up Yato!"
"You know Yukine I think of you as my friend, no, more as of a little brother." He says. Whaat? How should I respond. I never thought that someone could think of me like that. Especially Yato. More important why does it make me happy. Why does the thought that the Jersey God cares for me. As a younger brother.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I ask him
"What you heard" I can see him blushing a little. Haha you're not so great huh Yato.
"umm… thank you" I whisper.
"What was that."
"Nothing!"
"aww Yukine I knew that you cared for me."
"Just shut up and go to sleep." I murmur
"But you're the one who woke me up. And besides why are you hugging me?" he smirks
OH crap. I forgot that I hugged him earlier. Ugh but This feels warm . I feel secure. It's nice.
"Because I'm cold " I pout.
But then Yato hugs me too. This night just keeps getting weirder. Like really weird. But I like it, kinda.
"Sorry about that Slap. I was angry. You know that those things aren't true, right?"
"hmm…"
"Right Yukine? You need to start to believe in yourself more."
"Okay." I believe him. I feel confident now. Like nothing can beat me. Us.
"Sleep tight Yukine." He ruffles my hair once again. It's a nice feeling. A good change after that horrible nightmare.
It's quiet. Like really quiet. And I like it. For the first time in my undead life I feel secure.
"You know that you're annoying when you do that!" I say
"DO what? What did I do wrong this time. I just tried to comfort you" He asks somehow worried. I laugh a bit. It's funny to see him upset like that
"Act like my big brother." I shrugged
"But isn't that the thing that big brothers are here for?" He just smiles and I feel my lips curling to return the smile. Sometimes I'm grateful for him. But of course, again, I would never admit it.
"I guess you're right."
I smile and fall asleep. A sleep without nightmares. Because I gained family, no, I had it before but I just haven't realized it. I had a big brother since long time ago. And it made me feel home, it made me feel secure for the first time in forever
END
Well hope some of you liked it. See ya next time ^^
