Notes: Another little drabble because I wanted something short and Merlin dealing with the executions. Poor boy.
o.
Merlin thinks he has gotten used to it by now, but every time it happens it feels like he's witnessing it for the first time. A young woman uses magic to try and save her dying sister. Uther has her executed the very next morning. Merlin watches from a window, sick with fear and guilt, because he could've done something to stop this. The next night he dreams of fire and burning and death. Arthur doesn't say a word about it, only watching the manservant silently the next day.
Merlin befriends one of the stable boys, his name is Jeremiah and he's funny and childish and Merlin actually finds himself enjoying the boy's company. Two weeks later, Uther orders the boy's arrest and the morning after Jeremiah burns in the courtyard, for everyone to see. Someone whispers sorcery, another says robbery. But Merlin doesn't watch. It feels like everywhere he looks, there's death.
Weeks after Arthur finds out about Merlin's magic, a servant is arrested for practicing magic. It was something harmless, of course, but the servant is tied to the pyre the next day. Merlin stands by Arthur's side as the servant's screams echoes in the morning. Merlin closes his eyes, trying to drown out the horror. When it's over and Merlin opens his eyes, Arthur is watching him with narrowed eyes. Merlin is suddenly gasping, horrified to hear his breath catch, and Arthur hurriedly leads him away.
"Merlin, breathe," Arthur whispers in his ear when they're alone in the confinement of Arthur's chambers. Arthur's hands are gentle as they grip Merlin's shoulders and Merlin takes a deep breath, calming his racing heart. Arthur watches him through concerned eyes and Merlin closes his eyes, because everywhere he looks he sees flames.
Merlin thinks he has gotten used to the executions by now, but he will never get used to it. And he will never stop wondering if one day, it'll be Merlin himself tied to that pyre.