To Make a Wish
Kanda X Allen
Disclaimer: All characters belong to the creators, publishers, and producers of D. Gray-Man
Chapter 1: Swordsman's Cruelty
The dining-hall door slammed open, cracking the wall as the handle collided with the heavy stones. Silence fell slowly as conversations died off, broken only by the loud tapping of sharp boot-heels. Heads turned to watch the progress of the dark-haired swordsman as he advanced on Jerry like an avenging angel. In the back row, a snow-white head tipped toward flaming auburn.
"Why is Kanda so angry?" Allen whispered, staring as a stiff-shouldered Kanda accepted a large bowl of soba from the braided chef. Lavi didn't answer right away, instead watching mesmerized as Kanda turned sharply and marched from the hall. When the abused door had finally groaned shut once more, he managed to tear his eyes away from the forbidding woodwork and directed attention to the young exorcist's question.
"Yu hates summer. He also hates coming back after missions. And he hates it when Komui sends Linali to give him a lousy mission because he's to chicken-shit to do it himself. And--"
"Ano, Lavi," Allen interrupted. "Thank you, but listening to all of the things that Kanda hates will take way too much time."
"I suppose you're right," Lavi agreed and the two of them lapsed into silence. All around them conversations were being struck up once more and Jerry's pans rattled in the background as he began working on a Finder's order. Allen shifted in his seat so that he could reach the salt cellar and the white-haired exorcist began spooning the crystals into his soup rather absentmindedly. Lavi's eyebrows slowly slid up, eventually vanishing under his teal bandana as Allen's soup got saltier and saltier. Allen didn't seem to even notice what he was doing. Lavi waited patiently for the boy to snap back to reality. And waited. And waited. And waited. Finally, when Allen's soup closely resembled the Dead Sea, Lavi reached out and placed his hand over Allen's spoon-hand. Surprised, Allen jerked away, somehow managing to flip his chair over, and, flailing his arms madly, exorcist and chair crashed to the floor.
"Ano? Lavi? Could you help me up?" came Allen's voice from under the table. Laughing evilly, Lavi extended a hand to the prostrate boy and pulled him to his feet.
"What were you thinking about?" Lavi queried interestedly, wondering what could focus the exorcist to the exclusion of all else.
"Kanda."
Lavi stopped dead. "Kanda? Is he really that captivating?" Allen looked confused by Lavi's question, so the hammer-wielder felt prompted to elaborate. And to embarrass Allen.
"Oh, Allen!" Lavi exclaimed loud enough for everyone in the hall to hear clearly. "No wonder you weren't paying attention! After all, why would anyone want to carry on a conversation with boring old Lavi when you could day-dream about the ice prince? He's gorgeous isn't he? All that long black hair to spread out over the pillow. And he's so quiet, but I'll bet that doesn't last long when you're with him. Or is it the other way around? Maybe it's you screaming with your hair over the pillow? Either way, it's a good image--"
By this time, every face was a picture of stunned amazement and every ear was straining to hear Lavi's next words. Allen, face burning a brilliant crimson, stood frozen with horror. Lavi paused purely for dramatic effect, enjoying himself immensely.
"Or maybe," Lavi continued, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper, "just maybe, you've found an even better use for that shape-shifting cursed hand of yours. What idiot ever decided to call it 'Innocence', when I'm sure every exorcist has used it for a far-from-innocent purpose?"
Allen gulped like a landed fish, his mortification preventing him from fleeing the hall. Lavi grinned down at him from his lofty height, his one visible eye crinkling with glee.
"L-Lavi!" Allen choked out. "Shut up!"
"What's up? Did you not want your little Kanda-fantasy to be shared with everyone?" Lavi chattered on, oblivious to the silence that suddenly blanketed the hall. "I'm sure he's your uke in your dreams, isn't he?" Lavi paused as a chill of foreboding crept up his spine. He noticed Allen's wide-eyed gaze of horror as the white-haired boy stared past his shoulder. Lavi turned, feeling sick.
"Yu, I can explain--, " the hammer wielder started hastily, but Kanda beat him to the punch. Metaphorically, of course.
"Innocence activate! Mugen, ichigen!"
When the dust finally settled, Lavi was cowering behind an enlarged hammer and Allen was restraining Kanda. The huge, scaled innocence-hand was curled around the swordsman's body, crushing him to Allen's chest. Kanda was struggling furiously, his face ashen with anger. Casting an apologetic glance at Lavi, Allen began to drag the raven-haired boy from the room. Finders and exorcists alike watched amazed as Allen's parasitical innocence split into two parts; one to continue to restrain a writhing Kanda, the other to control Mugen, which continued to pulse with threatening energy.
The pair stumbled into the hall awkwardly as Kanda's legs had somehow become entangled in Allen's. They staggered a few steps from the mighty doors of the hall before collapsing in a heap just as Linali rounded the corner. Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped. Kanda had apparently given up on breaking away from Allen with Mugen's power and was now clawing at the white-haired boys shoulder and neck, having wriggled around to face the other exorcist within tight confines of the parasitical arm. Allen' face was obscured by the long inky tresses trailing over Kanda's shoulders, but Linali simply assumed he was enjoying himself because his hips bucked up against the older exorcist occasionally.
On the floor, Kanda kneed Allen viciously in the thigh again, causing the smaller boy to write and buck in an attempt to dissuade the sword master.
"Let go of me, you son-of-a-bitch," hissed Kanda, sinking his nails into the soft flesh of Allen's neck. Allen's response was cut off in a moaning gurgle as Kanda's hands tightened. The innocence gripping the swordsman clenched around his chest, bruising his ribs and driving the air from his lungs in a short, sharp cry.
Linali's face burned with embarrassment as the two boys struggled against each other on the floor.
"Ano," she began before choking on her tongue. "Ano," she tried again. "Komui wants to talk to Kanda in the laboratory."
At that moment Kanda let out a strangled gasp and collapsed. Allen, who no longer had to contain a struggling Kanda, sighed with relief and relaxed.
"What happened to him?" Linali asked while secretly preparing herself for an answer that was sure to make her blush.
"He passed out," Allen explained, looking surprised. Linali stared at him with an expression that indicated that she was waiting for further explanation rather than a statement of the obvious. Allen thought for a moment, attempting to remember something that would have caused Kanda to slide into unconsciousness. The boy's face suddenly lighted as he realized what he had done.
"I guess I squeezed him too hard."
The blush that flared into existence on Linali's face looked painful, but the flustered woman managed to state in a semi-calm voice, "What should I tell Komui? He wanted to talk to Kanda."
Allen immediately volunteered his assistance, "I'll take him down to see Komui and explain what happened." Linali could only nod vaguely in agreement as the cursed exorcist returned Mugen to its sheath on Kanda's hip, pausing to adjust the swordsman's mussed clothes and to tie a knot in Kanda's belt, which had broken sometime during their fight. By the time Allen had decided on the best way to carry the prone exorcist down to the laboratory, Linali had found a mission of vital importance to accomplish and vanished.
Allen hoisted the older and heavier boy over his shoulders and flipped the long black strands of hair out of his face then set off for Komui's personal laboratory, the home of Komurin (in all of its stages of evolution) and Komui's "medical" equipment.
Mugen's hilt dug into the back of Allen's neck with each step he took and the white-haired teen was soon wriggling uncomfortably under the combined weight of Kanda and his own innocence, which trailed on the floor after him. Allen had not returned his arm to its normal state out of necessity: there was no telling exactly how much damage Kanda could do in the time it took Allen to activate his innocence and Allen remembered all-too-well the repairs Komui had done on his arm the first time Kanda had attacked him with Mugen.
And he wasn't even particularly angry with me then, either, Allen added mentally, shuddering slightly at the image his over-active imagination presented him with: Kanda cleaving him into pieced of various sizes with Mugen in the name of revenge.
Deeper and deeper into the fortress of the Order they went and Allen became more and more uncomfortable, finally seeking relief through distraction in the form of his surroundings.
Wall tile. Floor tile. Ceiling tile. Allen listed mentally. Left foot. Right foot. Bookman. Mugen in the back of my neck. Kanda's damn belt rubbing a welt on my shoulder. Allen could feel himself sliding off an imaginary precipice. Kanda's hair everywhere. Everywhere! How does he take care of it all? Sweat beaded on the boy's brow from the effect of avoiding that particular train of thought and his shoulders stiffened unconsciously, digging into Kanda's bruised ribs.
The swordsman moaned softly, his breath whooshing softly past the curve of Allen's ear. Seconds later, he hit the ground with a solid thud. Allen stood shaking in front of the crumpled sword wielder.
What the hell? Why did I do that? Allen's thoughts jumbled around in his head. Shivers ran down his spine as he turned to look at Kanda, who, since his ribs had just celebrated an unceremonious reunion with the floor, moaned again. Allen twitched like a nervous ferret. Just then, Komui's piercing voice echoed down the hall.
"Where is that arrogant brat? He's probably spending time with my sweet Linali doing unspeakable things to her!" Komui's voice crept slowly up the register until reached soprano wailing. A huge sweat drop appeared on Allen's forehead. Kanda with Linali? He thought hysterically. Komui really has gone insane. I'd better get Kanda to the Lab before Komui lets out--
"Komurin III! Take out that octopus Kanda!"
Allen let out a screech of horror, seized Kanda around the middle, and sprinted down the hall, desperately trying to reach the lab before the Komurin monster found them. He failed. Miserably. As he rounded the last corner, mechanical hands latched onto Kanda and drug him into the air. Unfortunately, Allen's huge innocence arm, which had been curled around the swordsman's limp form, was caught by the hands as well. The white-haired boy thrashed wildly as he was pulled along after Kanda into the gaping maw of Komurin III, screaming at the top of his lungs.
"No, no, no, nonononono," Allen sobbed, his cries muffled by the thick metal walls of Komurin's belly. He could feel the great beast swaying with each stride and feel the jarring impact of each step. The floor of the tiny room within the beast tilted first in one direction to another, sending Kanda's still unconscious body sliding back and forth over the smooth steel. As Allen watched, Komurin took an especially large step. On edge of the floor jerked up and Allen found himself careening across the floor toward Kanda. The two boys slammed together and then crashed into the wall. When Komurin III's next step sent them in the other direction, Allen was clutching his head and seeing stars, completely winded because Mugen's hilt had dug into his belly when he had collided with Kanda.
This couldn't get any worse, Allen thought. Just then, Kanda's piercing, cold eyes opened. Oh. It just got worse. Allen swallowed nervously and tried to edge away inconspicuously. Kanda was silent for a long unpleasant moment before he spoke.
"Where are we, Bean sprout?" his voice was soft and calm and all the more terrifying because of it.
"In Komurin III," Allen replied, giving up on inconspicuous to scoot away toward the opposite side of Komurin's belly.
"In . . . Komurin . . ." Kanda repeated slowly, his eyebrow starting to twitch with anger. "You let yourself be caught by Komurin?" The disgust in his voice was nearly palpable.
"Kanda, just let me--" Allen's explanation was interrupted by his suddenly indrawn breath as his eyes caught slight movement in the dim light. Kanda was drawing Mugen, its diamond-hard innocence blade ringing against the metal of it's sheathe.
"Kanda, wait--"
"Innocence, activate!" Mugen's blade howled through the air like a banshee, cleaving the half-light like a silver lightning bolt. Allen's eyes bugged out as the sword sheared through the air just in front of his face. A few fine, white hairs drifted down to the steel floor. There was a soft click as Kanda resettled his innocence in its sheathe.
"K-Kanda?" Allen stuttered, unsure of why he wasn't dead. "What-?" At that moment, Komurin III shuddered and collapsed, its top half sliding to the stone floor of the hall with a sickening crunch. Kanda shot one last ugly look at Allen, hopped down from Komurin's remains, and stormed back in the direction of the dining hall and his room. Allen watched with relief for a moment before he remembered why he was heading to the laboratory in the first place. With a cry of exasperation, he ran down the hall after the retreating exorcist.
"Wait! Kanda, wait!" he called to the unconcerned elder boy. "Komui wanted you to go to the lab." Kanda stopped moving briefly, probably considering whether or not to ignore the summons, then spun on his heel and marched past Allen. Allen watched him walk for a while, fascinated by the swaying of Kanda's hair, then set off to find Lavi. He had gone maybe three steps when a figurative wall of sound made his ear-drums want to explode.
"KANDA! HOW DARE YOU DO SUCH AWFUL THINGS TO MY DEAR LINALI!" came Komui's voice, outrageously outraged. There was a brief pause in the conversation, presumably filled by Kanda's reply, and then-
"ALLEN! KOMUI WANTS TO SEE YOU, NOW!"
Allen sighed. Why on earth is he referring to himself in the third person? he wondered idly, trotting down the hall, his boots tapping loudly on the heavy flagstones. He hesitated before the door, sucked in a deep breath, and slowly pulled open the thick door. He caught a brief glimpse of a sullen Kanda, a slightly disheveled laboratory staff, odd and ends of as-of-yet unmade Komurins, and a partially crumpled Timcampy before Komui latched onto him like a deranged limpet.
"ALLEN! KANDA SAID HE WAS WITH YOU AND NOT WITH LINALI!" Komui shrieked directly into the white haired exorcist's ear.
"Well, yes. He was only with Linali for a couple of minutes, but-"
"YOU LEFT KANDA ALONE WITH LINALI FOR A WHOLE MINUTE? THERE"S NO TELLING WHAT HE MIGHT HAVE DONE TO HER!"
Kanda's eyebrow was twitching furiously and there was no telling what he might have done to Komui if Linali had not walked in to bring the laboratory staff coffee. Komui let go of Allen like he had been burned, only to attach himself to Linali's legs a second later.
"LINALI! TELL YOUR NII-SAN WHAT THAT HORRIBLE OCTOPUS KANDA DID TO YOU!" he wailed, tears welling in his eyes.
"What are you talking about? Kanda was assaulting Allen, not me," Linali replied, sounding bewildered. Kanda had gone suspiciously still. "But you shouldn't punish him," she continued, "because," her voice dropped to a confiding whisper, "Allen looked like he was, well, enjoying it."
A deaf man could have heard a pin drop in that laboratory. The silence was all-consuming and absolute. Every eye was trained either on Kanda, who looked as though, at any moment, he might draw Mugen and put an abrupt end to all of their miserable lives, or on Allen, whose face could have easily made a tomato envious. Suddenly, Komui's laughter broke the tomb-like atmosphere, swiftly joined by a chuckle from Lavi, who had made his was to the lab while Komurin III had been detaining the other two exorcists.
"It looks like Yu isn't as chaste as he pretends to be, what with jumping on Allen in the main hall and all," Lavi whooped, still chuckling quietly. "No wonder you were blushing so hard when I was teasing you during breakfast, Allen. All the pleasant memories, eh? I suppose that answers my question, though..."
Lavi's voice trailed off theatrically and Allen, very confused as to what question Lavi was talking about, walked right into his trap by asking, "What question?" The second the words fell from his lips, Allen felt a sick sense of fascination, the same feeling that one gets while watching something that is too horrible to turn away from. Lavi's grin widened and turned wicked.
"L-Lavi...please, please, don't answer that question," Allen begged, hoping, praying, that the hammer-wielder would for once, just this once Allen pleaded mentally, exercise some discretion. Lavi's smile only became wider, stretching into the toothy grin of a cat toying with a trapped mouse. Allen shook his head wildly. Lavi shot him one last evil look, then turned his attention to Kanda.
"I'm not going to tell you, Yu," Lavi teased, his voice and manner flirtatious.
Allen's shoulders sagged with relief, and then something happened that would forever change how he looked at catastrophe.
"D'ya wanna know what the question was, Yu?"
Kanda's grip on Mugen's hilt tightened until his knuckles turned white. It was obvious that the teen was struggling with himself in some desperate inner battle because his arms trembled faintly with the exertion of trying not to reflexively decapitate the smiling red-head. The lab technicians watched with a sort of macabre curiosity as the raven-haired exorcist teetered on the edge of civility.
"No," Kanda finally hissed from between teeth clenched so tightly it was a wonder they didn't shatter. "No, I don't want to hear what the question you were discussing with Bean-sprout this morning is." Lavi faked disappointment for all of three seconds before his true, garrulous nature won over his common sense.
"Allen and I were trying to decide whether or not you were a bottom in bed, Kanda."
Kanda already-frayed temper snapped. Mugen cleared the sheathe so quickly that the blade's movement seemed to cleave the very fabric of time itself. Displaced air rushed back into the void the sword had left behind with a clap like thunder and the wind born from that single sword-stroke sent the enormous piles of paper and miscellaneous items that littered Komui's desk whirling skyward like a flock of malignant doves. There was a moment of perfect stillness and clarity in the laboratory following Kanda's abrupt motion, broken only by the soft fluttering of a thousand papers to the floor. The teal headband that permanently covered part of Lavi's face split in two with a soft rip and fell through the air to join the displaced papers on the floor. A single drop of blooded beaded on the clear flesh of Lavi's forehead and slid down his cheek like a scarlet teardrop.
Lavi's face froze in an expression of startled fear as his sea-green eyes met Kanda's scorching gaze. Kanda's fierce stare was a warning, daring Lavi to take his little joke just one step further. Lavi's eyes narrowed and he swallowed hard, but he couldn't resist a dare. All the laughter had gone out of the hammer-wielder, slipping out of him like the blood that dripped onto the white papers below and making his next words as hard and resolute and deadly-serious as Mugen's blade.
"I think you are the uke, Kanda," Lavi pronounced calmly. "You try so hard to keep others away, put them down. I think you'll lose control if you get close to someone, and that just wouldn't do, would it, Yu? I think you want to be mastered, Kanda. It would be so easy for you to just give up, to lay down your defenses, to yield to another. But your scared, aren't you, Kanda? You're afraid that once you lose control, you'll never get it back."
Kanda's shoulders stiffened and his jaw clenched. He turned on one heel and marched toward the door. Soft whispers had sprung up all around as the laboratory staff discussed Lavi's words, but Allen, Linali, and Komui remained still and quiet as a tomb, waiting in stunned disbelief for the next events to unfold themselves in all their painful splendor.
"Are you going to leave, Yu?" Lavi continued, his normally joking tones now harsh and pained, his face stony and drawn. "Are you going to run away from this? Are you going to run away from me?"
Kanda stopped short, his hand inches from the door handle. "Lavi-," he began, but the hammer-wielder cut him off, his voice shaking with suppressed sobs.
"Damn it, Yu! I've known you for years, since the very first day you came here dragging that damn sword behind you, and you still won't relax around me!" Lavi choked on the bitter taste his words left behind, but struggled to finish, his words pouring out like water from behind a breached dam. "I'm not going to hurt you, Yu. Just give me a chance to get close to you. You let Allen get close to you, to see a little bit of the person I know is hiding under that frigid bastard of an exterior, so why not me?"
Allen was startled by the jealousy and anger that marred Lavi's words and a sick feeling twisted in the young exorcist's gut. Flashes of all the times he had spent with Kanda flitted through his mind like silver fish in a vast ocean and the white-haired boy couldn't help but feel guilty though he knew that he had done no wrong. His eyes fell on Kanda, who stood with his back to Lavi's desperately emotional, heart-felt pleas. Kanda, he thought sadly, be gentle with this. This isn't something that can be solved with a sword. Even you can't just tread on another's feelings, and I know Lavi doesn't see this as a joke anymore. Kanda's head dipped as though he had heard the white-haired exorcist's words. His inky bangs shifted to obscure his eyes and there was a momentary pause as everyone waited for Kanda's response. The silence deepened and became expectant when Kanda drew breath to give his answer.
"Lavi," Kanda said softly, completely monotone. "You're annoying." Lavi gasped as though he had been struck and true tears spilled from his soft eyes, mingling with the blood on his cheek to form a roseate rain.
"Kanda!" Allen yelled, furious at Kanda's crass statement. "Kanda, you bastard!" The boy strode across the lab and gripped the taller, black-haired exorcist by the collar, shaking him angrily. Seconds later, the shorter boy was shoved roughly against Kanda's chest as Lavi brushed past and sprinted from the room weeping. The two exorcists toppled to the floor from the force of their Lavi-induced collision.
"Lavi!" Allen cried out after the hammer-wielder while he wallowed in the huge paper pile on the floor, Kanda on his lap.
Komui crossed his arms over his chest and nodded his head with the air of one about to make a great and masterful statement. "I'm convinced," he announced. "Kanda didn't do anything to Linali." Allen, who had resumed shaking Kanda to within n inch of his life, paused to stare at Komui in disbelief. Linali sighed and tapped her brother on the shoulder.
"Nii-san, I don't think you understand the gravity of this situation," she said as green energy began to flow from her boots. "Why don't you go meditate on it?" The toe of her boot-innocence slammed into his chest and Komui flew backward through the air until a wall interposed itself between the hapless man and his flight-path. Komui slid to the floor twitching.
"And you," Linali snapped at Kanda, picking up a clipboard. The laboratory staff recoiled, having felt Linali's punishment-by-clipboard before. "How dare you be so cruel to Lavi? He's been nothing but good to you since the day you came here, and this is how you repay him. I want you to get the hell out of here, Kanda. Your mission folder is on Komui's desk."
Kanda glared at her, but didn't argue. He stood and shook Allen off his collar, then sifted through the papers remaining on the desk until he unearthed a pair of leather-bound folders. Kanda stared at them for a moment before speaking.
"There are two of them."
"That's right," Linali snarled. "Lavi came down to the lab because Komui was going to send the two of you together, but I guess we can't have the mighty Kanda working with someone he finds annoying." Allen shifted uncomfortably on the floor, looking surreptitiously for a place to hide from Linali's wrath. Seconds later, he noticed that he was alone in the room with Linali, Kanda, and an unconscious Komui. The staff must have escaped while Linali was yelling at Kanda, Allen realized.
"I'll just go by myself," Kanda stated, adjusting Mugen's position on his hip.
"That is unacceptable, Kanda," Linali hissed at him. "Read your report. Three finders are missing and six of them have vanished outright. You are not going by yourself." Her gaze fell on Allen. "Take him with you."