==Sollux: Mourn

When you woke up, lying face-first in the dirt, you didn't quite understand where you were. You sat up slowly, brushing debris from your clothes. Your surroundings were unfamiliar and you weren't sure how you got there. The last thing you could clearly remember was sitting in front of your husktop. You had been chatting with a friend about a new feature in one of the games you both enjoyed. Come to think of it, you weren't sure what happened after that. You remembered logging off due to a sudden splitting headache, but that was it.

You looked around, trying to figure out what had happened. You seemed to be in a barely-inhabited area. The terrain was mostly flat and gray, the occasional scraggly tree visible amongst the sparse grasses.

You looked down at your hands and your heart dropped. They were splattered in a thick, dark red liquid. The way it reflected the moons' weak rays made it look almost scarlet. You were almost afraid to search for the source of the blood, but you slowly stood to look around you anyways. You only knew one person with blood of that shade and you were hoping desperately that she wasn't here.

After a few minutes of pointless stumbling around, you rose up using your psionics. You immediately spotted the small, crumbling foundation of what used to be a building, most likely someone's hive. You were almost afraid to investigate, but you drifted forward anyways.

You landed silently in front of the scattered stones and splintered wood surrounding what was left of the hive itself. You hoped against hope that you wouldn't find any evidence of life. That way you could just blame this all on your weird abilities and leave.

Unfortunately, there was a smear of scarlet blood in the dust just a few feet away. You stepped over a large chunk of wood to get a closer look. There was a trail of the dark liquid that lead away from you, under what was probably a doorframe not too long ago, and around the back of what remained of the ruined hive. Ignoring the fear that tugged at the edge of your mind like an attention-seeking child, you followed the path that had been marked with droplets of red.

When you reached the end of the gruesome trail, you had to suppress a scream. Sitting before you, slumped against the last remaining wall of the previously-a-hive, was one of your closest friends. You stared in shock at the large splatters of scarlet that surrounded her, at the smears of red on the wall, and finally at the broken body of Aradia.

You ran forward, barely thinking as you lifted her up, cradling her in your arms. You were screaming something that sounded vaguely like her name, but came out more like the sound of a dying lusus. Aradia, who had been your best friend, possibly your girlfriend, and who had always been there for you was now in your arms, bloody and broken.

You tried to wake her up, but no amount of screaming her name, sobbing, or begging brought her back. She was dead. She was dead and there was nothing you could do to change it. You slumped to the ground, holding Aradia to your chest as if being close to your own heart could make hers start once more.

Something felt horribly wrong with this whole thing. You couldn't figure out why you were here, or why Aradia's blood had been on your hands, or why you couldn't remember either of these things. You couldn't figure out how Aradia's entire hive had been obliterated like this. Most of all, you just couldn't figure out why Aradia was killed in the first place. Nothing made any sense. Nothing made—

Oh.

Realizing what must have happened was like being punched in the stomach. It literally knocked the wind out of you and left you struggling to breath. Your mind raced, trying to think of alternative possibilities. But there were none. It was you. You had killed her. It was the only way that the pieces fit together. The only real explanation.

The tears stopped streaming down your face as you brought your head up and looked around you again, looking for an explanation. There. You laid Aradia's body on the ground gently before standing and walking to the cloth draped across one wall. You lifted it slightly and saw the message. "Th8nks for the help," it said. It was followed by an eight-eyed winking face. You grimaced at the dark words, drawn in the very blood that Vriska had spilt.

Why had she done it? Aradia was one of the sweetest, friendliest girls you knew. She rarely did anything to upset anyone. You didn't know why, but you had stopped caring. Aradia was dead and there was nothing you could do.

You returned to the body for a moment, laying her hands over her heart. Even in death, she was still beautiful. Her shirt was stained and her skirt was torn, but it almost looked natural. She'd never been able to keep her clothes clean for very long. She was always knee-deep in some sort of project that involved lots of fancy tools and dirt. Her dark hair was a tangled, bloody mess that surrounded her face. In contrast, it made her usually flushed cheeks seem even paler, making it even more painfully obvious that she was gone.

You could almost hear her laughing as you gazed at those once-bright eyes, now totally expressionless. You gave her a half-hearted smile, brushing a few strands of hair out of her face. You brushed your lips lightly against her forehead and gently closed her eyes before straightening up and walking away. There was nothing more to do. You had said farewell.

If you could have, you would have immediately found Vriska and made her pay for taking such a beautiful life. But you knew it was pointless. She was too high on the hemospectrum, and Aradia was far too low. You yourself were only a mustard-blood. You'd end up culled if you tried to do anything. And knowing that Aradia wouldn't want more pointless killing, you simply left her, looking serene even in death, and returned to your own hive, tears beginning to burn in your eyes once more.