Written after a prompt on Merlin Mpreg, this is a new one and obviously Mpreg, set right after season 3, will not follow canon there after, thankyou readers, have a good read.

MAYBE BABY

CHAPTER - 1

It all started on one of 'those' days where everything was slow and tiresome and the list of chores sitting on Merlin was taking an inordinate toll on his person. Arthur had been even more of a prat than his usual standards ever since Morgana and Morgause had stolen the throne and then been driven back, and Uther had gone off into this madness than no one was able to bring him out of.

Merlin understood of course that Arthur was under a lot of stress now as Prince Regent and he was trying to keep the broken kingdom together with single minded determination. And Arthur handled the situation admirably well in fact that no one would be able to tell how much of a toll it was taking on him, except Merlin of course who bore the brunt of Arthur's ill temper, Arthur never cared for how he behaved when he was around Merlin and as a result Merlin had been running ragged with all the impossible things the Prince was asking him to do.

And even still Arthur was not satisfied and in the past week alone Merlin had been sent to the stocks three times, which was a record for him and Merlin had naively thought that Arthur and him were past these petty vindictive execution of Arthur's status as his master over Merlin.

Merlin kept on cursing as he ascended the winding stairs carefully balancing Arthur's tray of food in his aching fingers, he'd been polishing shields and chainmail all morning because Arthur the prat had asked him to polish the entire armory's shields and chainmail that was kept in store and had not seen the daylight in years. His explanation for it was that they might need all the extra equipment now that they were under danger from Morgana and who knows what else at any given time.

And Merlin agreed whole heartedly but for Arthur's rather cruel intention of making him do it all by himself, all alone and he couldn't even use his magic because he was too exhausted emotionally and mentally for it to work like a charm. He'd probably make the entire armory float and get himself burnt at the pyre if he did, so he had to do it all by hand and as a result his hands were smarting.

When Merlin opened the door he was dreading the thought of what other torture Arthur had planned for him for the next day but as he entered it was to see an Arthur who was sitting slumped in his armchair staring rather pensively into the fireplace where a merry fire was burning.

Arthur didn't even acknowledge Merlin's presence in the room and Merlin despite himself worried, Arthur had been very broody as off late and though he had enough reasons to be it was still unlike himself to sit slumped and stare without seeing into the fireplace, it disturbed Merlin to see Arthur so.

He cleared his throat and said "Arthur I've brought your dinner."

Arthur made no sign that he heard except for nodding his head and Merlin almost left him to it then, thinking back Merlin wondered why he'd been so foolish to be concerned, if he'd not done as he had he would not be in his position right now.

"Arthur….are you alright?"

Arthur scoffed and slumped further in his chair.

"Okayy….stupid question I know….what's wrong Arthur?"

Arthur finally turned to look at him, with derision he said "What makes you think I'll tell you Merlin?"

He alteast didn't deny that something was wrong thought Merlin, Arthur could be stubborn to think everything was right in his world even when it was not all the time until someone made him realize it really wasn't.

"You'll tell me because you are my friend….and you always blab to me anyway….you can't keep it a secret from me."

Arthur snorted but there was no humor in it, only weariness, "We're not friends Merlin" said Arthur firmly and Merlin tried to not let that hurt so much, but by the way his chest tightened almost to the point of it being hard to breathe he didn't succeed.

Arthur turned back to the fire and Merlin let several minutes pass before going forward and kneeling on the floor next to where Arthur was sat, "Come now" he persuaded gently, knowing Arthur was as sensitive as a hare, "I know it's killing you to keep it inside….tell me….even if you don't consider me a friend, I consider you to be mine."

Arthur kept quiet for a long time, his dark eyes melancholic and staring straight ahead into the fire and just when Merlin thought he wasn't going to get through Arthur spoke, "They all leave me Merlin….why do they all leave me?"

"Am I such a horrid person Merlin? Do I deserve this bereavement?" Arthur spoke quietly and at the end his voice broke belying how much pain he was in and how much it was costing him to tell Merlin this.

Merlin knew Arthur meant Morgana and spoke, "Arthur…Morgana….I don't think she was ever hating of you….she hated Uther and you were just in her way to become Queen…."

"I knew her since we were children Merlin; she was already a sister to me….I still think of her so…."

Merlin didn't know what to say to that, Morgana's betrayal had broken Merlin's heart as well and Merlin only knew too well how losing a friend in such a sure way was, how must Arthur feel now knowing she was his half sister, Merlin couldn't fathom.

"And my father…..he left me too"

Merlin was confused as he knew Uther was still residing inside the castle walls broken by Morgana's betrayal perhaps but still alive, only when Arthur kept pouring his heart did Merlin understand, "I wasn't enough for him Merlin….I am his son and I wasn't enough….I never was….he always favored Morgana and now that she's gone he's lost his sanity….he doesn't think of me as a worthy reason to exist Merlin….somedays he doesn't even recognize me just keeps muttering Morgana's name…"

Arthur was silently crying now and Merlin's heart ached for his prince, this beautiful man whom Merlin had devoted his life for and who was in such pain the likes of which Merlin hadn't even suspected, and he was supposed to look after Arthur.

"Arthur, you're father loves you and you have people here who care about you so much Arthur, Gwen, Leon, Gaius…..me" Merlin said the last part quietly, "you're not alone and you'll never be because all of us will always be on your side, no matter what….you'll never loose us, we'll never leave you."

Arthur looked up at the ceiling, obvious dismay apparent, "My knights are loyal to me because they have sworn their fealty to the Crown Merlin, Gwen…." Arthur hesitated for a whole minute before saying what he had to say, "she only picked me because Lancelot left her….and you….most of the time you consider to me to be a horrid person Merlin, perhaps I do deserve it…."

Merlin couldn't quite believe Arthur, brave, noble, bull headed Arthur believed himself to be so unwanted, he'd always acted like he was a gift bestowed by the god's upon his unworthy subjects that Merlin was stunned that under all of that bluster Arthur had these insecurities about himself, it didn't suit Arthur and no one had the right to make Arthur feel so.

His actions next were fueled by raw emotion at the wrongness of Arthur feeling this way and Merlin looked startled only after he'd grabbed Arthur's face in his hands, his sore hands resting on the Prince's cheeks making Arthur look into his eyes, but he braved on despite the sudden flutter of his heart and a queasy feeling in his stomach. "Arthur I don't know how you've deluded yourself into believing all of this, Gwen chose you over Lancelot because she loves you, you're knights choose to follow you because they love you, I choose to be you're servant till the day I die because I love you…"

Merlin didn't quite realize what he'd let loose in the heat of the moment but only when Arthur's eyes widened did Merlin fear for himself, he'd never meant to say that out loud to Arthur, never in a million years, his unrequited feelings for the golden haired Prince was a deeply guarded secret no one but he knew and before he could retrace his statement and not make it so passionate Arthur's hands closed around his and Arthur asked with doubt, "Do you really mean it?"

Arthur's eyes were boring into his with a vulnerability Merlin had hardly ever been privy to and Merlin knew that he couldn't deny Arthur the truth now, not when Arthur was looking at him like his life depended upon Merlin's answer, Merlin closed his eyes praying for Arthur to not hate him for this as he said "Yes Arthur….I do love you" Merlin opened his eyes and licked his lips and Arthur's eyes were immediately drawn to the movement and before Merlin could think Arthur's lips were upon his.

Despite the many number of times Merlin had imagined this happening Merlin couldn't quite believe that it was happening, Arthur was kissing him, kissing Merlin, willingly and of his own accord, Merlin had never thought he'd get to have this in a million years. In his state of shock he'd remained numb and unresponsive and Arthur drew back already looking doubtful and angry and before he could open his mouth and ruin the moment Merlin drew Arthur close by his neck and kissed him again.

Arthur let out a grunt in surprise before he slid his lips with Merlin's chaste and gentle in a way Merlin never thought Arthur's kisses would be. Merlin had expected Arthur to kiss with wild passion, to dip in and take what he wanted with a single minded focus Merlin saw in how he fought but Arthur was a passionate lover and he was languid in exploring Merlin's mouth, like he was tasting ambrosia and he wanted to make it last.

Merlin didn't know when or how they got to the bed and then he was naked and Arthur was kissing every inch of his skin making lust burn hot in Merlin's veins and making his toes curl in pleasure as Arthur took his cock in his sword callused hands and began to stroke.

The first time Arthur slid his cock into Merlin, Merlin thought he was going to die from the pain of being split apart so thoroughly but Arthur gentled him hushing him and speaking an incoherent jumble of sweet nothings into Merlin's ears until Merlin finally relaxed around Arthur and Arthur moved. They came too fast, neither of them lasting long.

The second time was better as Arthur had Merlin on his hands and knees in the sumptuous bed and took position behind Merlin, he was hitting straight into a bundle of something inside Merlin that made Merlin incoherent with pleasure and mewl wantonly to Arthur. Arthur draped himself over Merlin's back, took Merlin's ears between his teeth and nibbled on them saying "So eager for me Merlin…so tight…fuck!"

Arthur spilled himself inside Merlin after a long while, Merlin's insides felt thoroughly bruised and when Arthur pulled out his asshole clinged to Arthur's cock making a squelching sound as Arthur pulled out which made Merlin blush and bury his head into the pillows in mortification.

What absolutely made Merlin cringe though was when Arthur raised him up back onto his hands and knees and parted his cheeks observing his puffed red whole making Merlin try to close his thighs in shame but Arthur slapped his arse and drew a finger down and over his opening slicking his fingers in the come that dribbled out of Merlin.

"Arthurr…" Merlin squeaked as Arthur put his mouth on his whole then and rimmed him pushing his tongue in and out and making Merlin squirm in desperate mortification and desperate lust.

They'd exhausted themselves after that and they both fell asleep for awhile before Arthur got Merlin up with his mouth latched onto Merlin's flat nipples.

The third time was when Merlin witnessed Arthur's absolute passion, his carnal urges were so overwhelming that Merlin felt like he was being mounted rather than made love to.

Arthur made him ride his cock looking into Merlin's eyes the whole time as he grabbed Merlin's hips and brought them down again and again, and once he couldn't take the slow pace anymore Arthur flipped them while still inside him and when Merlin was flat on his back he wasn't even given a moment to breathe before Arthur thrust inside in a brutal, hard and fast pace making Merlin move up with the force of his thrusts and Merlin could only open his mouth and utter "Ahh….ahh….Arrrthur…..Arthur….ahh…."

Arthur came inside him with a shout for the final time on that night before both of them slipped off into slumber again.

At present Merlin blushed with the recollections of their one and only ill fated night together and noticed Arthur looking at him like he knew what he was thinking about. He then remembered Gaius' diagnosis and the predicament he was in.

He glared at Arthur making Arthur's eyes widen in alarm before Merlin screamed "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT YOU PRAT!"

Merlin didn't wait for Arthur to regain his bearings as he rushed past Gaius, Arthur and Gwaine and into his room shutting the door with a loud bang.

Inside the room and on his own now Merlin started to cry in earnest remembering how the morning after had been.

Merlin was curled up cozily in a mountain of blankets and a soft bed that felt like he'd laid on clouds and Merlin sighed wondering if he'd died and gone to heaven, this was pure bliss.

Only as he awakened did he feel the various places in which his body was sore and then he woke up properly and sat up in a hurry as he remembered everything that had happened last night.

Arthur was already up and dressed and he was breaking his fast rather calmly, Merlin felt awkward like he'd never felt before in front of Arthur and wondered what he ought to do now.

"Merlin, finally decided to wake up, did you?" asked Arthur with a pinched expression on his face. Merlin's stomach plummeted at the tone of Arthur's voice and he blushed shamefully as he got outside the bedding and pulled on his clothes which were scattered on the floor, Arthur was resolutely averting his eyes from Merlin the whole time and Merlin felt tears pool in his eyes despite knowing this was what would happen if he'd capitulate to his own desires, what had Merlin expected really? For Arthur to grant him a loving kiss? Perhaps he had thought that foolishly and boy did it smart now knowing Arthur was disgusted with him enough to not even cast a glance at him?

Merlin did not think he could hear whatever vitriol Arthur no doubt wanted to spout at him now so he made to escape the room but Arthur's voice stopped him at the threshold.

"No one can know what happened here Merlin…"

When Merlin turned to look at Arthur his eyes were hard and his tone held a warning, "Last night….was a mistake….one that shall never be repeated and never be spoken of, do you understand Merlin?"

And Merlin wondered for the first time feeling his heart break into tiny million pieces how he'd ever ever fallen for this arrogant cold man and why he kept dedicating his magic and his love for Arthur, "I understand" Merlin said just as coldly, proud of himself for appearing so calm when he was shattering inside and finally left Arthur's presence, he couldn't bear to look at Arthur for even a moment longer.

What he didn't know was that just as soon as Merlin left Arthur stood up from his chair sending it skittering to a far corner in the force of his anger, he upended the table knowing it would be awhile before Merlin willingly entered his chambers.

Merlin couldn't know, Merlin could never know how much it cost Arthur to say those things to him, he couldn't know how much Arthur was ripping his own heart as he broke Merlin's.

Needless to say Arthur and Merlin had both given the other a wide berth the following weeks neither wanting to be in the others presence.

Until the Knights; Gwen and Gaius noticed and started needling them both for answers, they had never been in a tizzy for so long before and all of them wondered what could have happened to break their legendary bond that everyone in Camelot were a bit envious of.

Not being able to withstand their scrutiny Merlin resumed his duties for Arthur and Arthur made sure to act atleast civil in Merlin's presence, they had lost their easy camaraderie and banter though which both of them moaned the loss of.

And if Merlin was all Arthur could think about in the dead of the night when he was all alone in his room and remembering his one fevered night with Merlin then nobody was the wiser.

Gwen knew something was up with them though, even if both of them denied anything ever happening other than a massive fight, she knew how men who fought acted and that was not the way in which Arthur and Merlin were behaving.

If a fight was what had happened Arthur would have dragged Merlin into a headlock making Merlin break his silence or even painfully apologized in his own way of apologizing without apologizing and Merlin being the big sweet heart that he was would have forgiven Arthur with a tiny smile of the gravely put upon.

Rather Arthur was being very careful to never touch Merlin these days when Gwen was accustomed to seeing Arthur rough house Merlin and grab him all time of the day before.

And Merlin had this frown and pinched eyebrows whenever he had to be near Arthur, neither meeting the others eyes as Merlin seemed to want to be anywhere but near Arthur and ran off as soon as he was finished getting Arthur's chainmail on him. He wasn't even sitting on the sidelines to watch the Knight's practice anymore and that was when Gwaine was alarmed, Merlin loved to see the knights practice and something that was keeping him from being there must be serious indeed and Gwaine cast Arthur a suspicious look before deciding to confront him later on.

"Princess, what did you do to him?" Gwaine was in Arthur's face as soon as Arthur was in the armory and out of the other knights' presence, Arthur had to find a new sword since Merlin had neglected to polish his usual one and it had begun to rust.

Arthur knew very well what Gwaine meant but then he goaded, "Am I supposed to know what you mean by that Gwaine?"

"Don't you dare! You know very well what I mean, what did you do to Merlin?" asked Gwaine grabbing Arthur by his shirt with rage in his eyes.

Arthur shrugged out of his hold and spat, "I did nothing to him, and be careful about handling me in such a manner Sir Gwaine, I am your sovereign."

"The hell you are!" Gwaine screeched before he marched out of the armory leaving Arthur behind. Arthur rubbed his temples in annoyance before going out to start the Knight's drills and found Gwaine missing, he'd probably run off to see Merlin thought Arthur and if he was particularly vicious throughout practice that day nobody had the guts to comment on it.

Arthur and Merlin would have gone on ignoring each other and acting all out of sorts except Merlin started to sicken and Arthur was finally letting his worry for Merlin guide his actions and he couldn't be standoffish to Merlin anymore even if he wanted to.

Arthur noticed it when Merlin brought his breakfast one morning and placed it on the table before immediately rushing off and emptying his guts in Arthur's washbowl, he kept retching even when there was nothing to vomit anymore and Arthur felt a tug towards Merlin and before he could think of it he'd rushed to where Merlin was slumped and put his arms around him.

Merlin was delirious enough to let Arthur guide him to sit down but once he was sitting he slapped Arthur's hands away and put his hands to his temples rubbing lightly.

Arthur tried not to let Merlin's actions hurt too much and said "Are you sick? Do you need Gaius?"

Merlin looked up at Arthur with his blue eyes and Arthur was transfixed for a moment that he didn't hear what had been said.

He said "What?" like a raving simpleton and Merlin cast him a scathing look before saying, "Gaius already gave me a tonic, he thinks it's a stomach bug."

"Right, go to your rooms then….rest the day" said Arthur knowing how uncharacteristic of him it was to let Merlin off so easily, even if he was sick.

And Merlin's incredulous look was apt as he asked "You're giving me a day off?"

Arthur turned away from him and then said "Yes Merlin….now go…"

"Hmm" Merlin huffed and Arthur turned back to see him rise from the chair, "I forgot you couldn't stand the sight of me these days, anything to get me out of your hair eh?" Merlin's tone was dry and sarcastic and Arthur began to protest only Merlin got a chagrined look in his eyes before he retched again right on Arthur's floor.

Arthur had to lead Merlin to Gaius rooms with an arm around Merlin because he was that disoriented and in danger of falling otherwise. It was the first time he'd been this close to Merlin ever since that night and even though he worried, Arthur's heart sang in joy at the closeness of Merlin's body to his.

As the week progressed Merlin didn't get better and instead his sickness seemed to take a strong hold of him as he lost what little weight he had and his eyes appeared baggy, his cheekbones stark and his complexion paler than ever. In the last few days Merlin had been throwing everything up that he'd taken to just drinking water and milk and had a difficulty keeping even them down.

Everyone was worried about Merlin and he had regular visitors in his rooms with Gaius as Arthur had forbidden him from doing any real work about the second time he'd puked right onto Arthur, Merlin had been mortified and sure Arthur was going to either hit him or push him away in revulsion but instead Arthur had looked scared and concerned and not even minded about the vomit on him and it was all making Merlin confused and annoyed with the Prince of Camelot, why could Arthur never behave in a consistent manner? Would it kill him to respect Merlin's heart once in a while?

And Merlin was sick of always having to vomit, his mouth tasted foul, his breath was rank and he felt completely miserable. No amount of medicines Gaius gave him seemed to make a difference and after a whole week of going through the ordeal Merlin was thoroughly exhausted.

Arthur, Merlin didn't know whether it was out of misplaced guilt kept bringing him the finest foods in the castle's kitchens making Merlin eat atleast some delicacy every day which Merlin vomited out right after anyway, it seemed to make Arthur even more guiltier when ultimately Merlin did puke it out but he wouldn't give up trying to feed Merlin anyway, in a way Merlin was touched that Arthur still cared about him so.

Merlin tried to heal himself with magic but his magic could find nothing wrong with him and didn't feel like it had to heal him, according to his magic he was as right as rain and it stung that his magic also seemed to be malfunctioning in ways it hadn't since his childhood, his magic had always healed his injuries and sickness and now it was failing him.

Merlin was crying when Gwaine entered his rooms one day and he'd grabbed onto a concerned Gwaine and started sobbing his heart out without even a proper reason.

Gwaine held him close and comforted him smoothing his hands down Merlin's back and petting his hair and that was the sight that greeted Arthur when he entered Merlin's room.

Arthur fisted his hands wanting to scream in rage, how dare Gwaine touch Merlin like this and how could Merlin let him. Arthur felt betrayed and jealous and he shouted "Just what the hell do you think you're doing?"

Gwaine looked up from where he was hugging Merlin and shrugged, "He was crying when I came in so I comforted him." There was not the slightest shame in Gwaine's voice and Merlin didn't even raise his head from where he'd buried it in Gwaine's neck.

"Merlin" Arthur's tone was icy calm as he besieged Merlin to let go of Gwaine this instant or Arthur was going to rip him away forcefully if need be.

Merlin looked up at Arthur finally although he was still sitting rather close to Gwaine on his small bed and Arthur was not pleased with the sight, "WHAT?" Merlin's tone was catty even though his eyes were puffy and red from crying.

Arthur floundered at the annoyance in Merlin's countenance while his chest ached at the sight of Merlin's red eyes.

"What do you want now? I'm not going to eat anything if that's why you're here!"

"I'm not here to force you to eat"

"Then what?"

Merlin was outright glaring at Arthur now and Arthur bristled, "Some people Merlin would be grateful that the Prince is concerned for their health"

"Bugger off Arthur…" Merlin stated flippantly and Arthur was shocked into stunned silence at the malice he felt behind those words. Merlin had always back answered, he'd been a red cheeked sass from the beginning but he'd never ever spoken to Arthur in quite a daring fashion before.

"What has gotten into you?" shouted Arthur not caring now whether he'd upset Merlin further or not.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Can't you seem I'm just worried about you?"

"AH! Now you're worried because I maybe about to die! You don't give a bloody damn except for when I'm close to death's door, I'm so fucking honored!" Merlin screamed and Arthur took a step back at the force of Merlin's anger.

"Merlin…don't…you're not going to die Merlin…" it was Gwaine's soft voice that broke the tension and Arthur was too stunned to be irate when Gwaine put his hands on Merlin's shoulder and all the anger seemed to drain out of Merlin all at once and he put his head in his hands sobbing again.

Neither Gwaine nor Arthur could comfort him as Merlin kept pushing them both away when they tried to go near him. Gwaine shot Arthur a glare murmuring 'fix this' into his ears before he got off the bed and out of Merlin's room.

Arthur approached Merlin cautiously, he was still hiding his face behind his hands and still sobbing, Arthur carefully enclosed him in his arms and held tight when Merlin protested feebly. Arthur held Merlin that night until the sobs died down and Merlin was calmly drawing circles on Arthur's back with his fingers and finally drifted off to sleep.

That night Arthur could not sleep as he pondered on Merlin's condition, it was very strange that Merlin was crying one minute and then completely angry the next, and then he'd been crying again and then he'd been as calm as a sleeping babe even letting Arthur hold him after he'd stopped crying, not that Arthur was complaining about that and most strangely Merlin had smiled at Arthur, one of his goofy face splitting grins before he'd gone off to sleep still smiling and content as a lazy kitten in the sun.

And Arthur had been under the impression that Merlin didn't want to see hair or hide of Arthur until then, it may be true still but this mercurial change of moods was unlike Merlin.

Arthur had never seen Merlin so bereft and crying openly, even on that one occasion where he did cry it was silently before they'd gone off to face the dragon and Arthur had told him no man was worth his tears, looking back now Arthur understood it to be a foolish statement.

Now Arthur might call Merlin a great girl but he'd never actually meant it in anything but jest, Arthur knew Merlin was one of the bravest man he'd ever met, he was braver than some of Arthur's knights. Arthur had only ever seen these kind of mood changes in Lady Eleanor when she'd been pregnant with her twins, being the wife of an important Lord she'd driven everyone batty with her crazy mood swings when Arthur was all of seventeen.

On one memorable day Morgana having reached the end of her patience had told Lady Eleanor to 'stop being such a bitch' in the exact same words and that had made Lady Eleanor burst out crying so frantically that even Morgana who'd inflicted the damage apologized to her after Uther's stringent glaring. Not a half a candle mark later Lady Eleanor was happily laughing with her husband about some joke he'd cracked about the venison not being to his tastes.

Arthur smiled thinking of the memory fondly before his mind came into an abrupt and halting revelation, he had slept with Merlin, he had slept with Merlin and emptied himself inside Merlin for three times that night, Merlin was sicking up everything he ate and acting strangely and Arthur sat up in bed shaking his head and slapping his forehead at his sheer stupidity.

'Of course it cannot be, it was ridiculous even to entertain the thought….because Merlin couldn't be…he was a he for god's sake and Arthur was dishonoring Merlin in thinking so'

But the uncomfortable revelation would not go out of his mind and Arthur from then on observed Merlin very closely when Merlin was near him.

Merlin had stubbornly declared that he'd be working saying that he was going to go mad if Arthur forbade him from going out any longer, he was tired of staying cooped up inside the castle all day long.

As a result Arthur made sure to give him chores that were light and which Merlin could do under Arthur's observation. And at other times Arthur could trust Gwaine and Lancelot to keep an eye on Merlin as he'd asked them to.

Arthur bade the person knocking on his door to enter and saw it was Gwen; he smiled genuinely pleased to see her and asked her to sit down.

Gwen did and then began to twiddle her thumbs which Arthur knew was a classic sign that she was anxious.

Arthur stopped her by pulling her hands into his, "What is it Guinevere?"

Gwen looked at him in consternation before asking "Are we…." She sighed and then seemed to make up her mind, "Are we still….or are we over Arthur?"

Arthur drew back feeling like he'd been slapped, "Of course we're not over Guinevere, what gave you that idea?"

Gwen looked at him in something akin to pity and said "Arthur, we haven't had a proper conversation in a month….and when we do talk it's always about Merlin…"

Arthur's brows pulled together as he pondered on Gwen's words and found them to be true, now it was turn to look in consternation at Gwen who seemed to struggle to keep her tears at bay.

"Oh Arthur…" Gwen put her hands on her head and said "I always knew he was special to you….but I thought….I thought….you loved me more…"

"I do love you more" said Arthur immediately, and even he wasn't convinced with his answer.

Gwen shot him a shrewd glare and Arthur cowered as he'd never been party to that particular look from her in years, it always made him feel like a naughty child.

"It's not right for either of us to deceive ourselves Arthur…."

"Camelot needs a Queen Gwen and even if it were that he held my affections…"

Gwen raised her hands and Arthur fell silent, "I need a man whose heart belongs to me Arthur…I think I deserve it, you'll just have to look for another to be your Queen."

With that Gwen got up and left Arthur alone.

Arthur moped for no more than two days before thoughts and worries about Merlin started plaguing him again and he no longer held any bitterness for Gwen having broken things off with him. It was obvious to Arthur now that he was head over heels in love with his manservant and he had been for many years and the unlikely cause of his sickness kept on nagging at Arthur's mind though he was loathe to give it voice. He kept reminding himself he'd be thought an utter idiot for even entertaining the thought and made his thoughts silent.

Merlin had fainted when he'd been observing the Knight's drills that morning and Gaius was beside himself with worry for his ward. Arthur had to carry him upstairs bridal style for the whole of Camelot's servants and Knights to see. Gwaine, Lancelot and Percival had offered of course but Arthur had scowled and said no resolutely.

Lancelot looked mildly disapproving at Arthur while Gwaine smirked and gave both Arthur and Merlin a speculative glance. Percival bless him was silent and let Arthur be for which he was Arthur's most favorite knight at the moment.

Gaius woke Merlin up with some sort of pungent fumes kept close to his nose and Merlin coughed as he woke up and batted away the offending thing saying "WHAT IS THAT?" in as scornful a tone as he could muster.

Arthur snorted and ruffled Merlin's hair as he was standing close by, he couldn't help himself, he longed to constantly touch Merlin these days. "You fainted on the practice field you great girl!"

"What?" asked Merlin still miffed at the smokes being used on him.

Arthur shook his head, "Rest Merlin and don't get up to any mischief, atleast for the sake of Gaius' sanity" Arthur murmured the last part so only Merlin could hear it and Merlin observed Gaius from where he was laid on the examination table, the Court Physician was going through some ancient tome with a frowning face, his worry for Merlin had increased ten fold as the sickness didn't abate and Merlin felt guilty for being so taxing on his old mentor.

Uther was surprisingly coherent and happy when Arthur went to visit him in the evening one day. Gwen had been avoiding Arthur ever since their confrontation and Arthur had asked one of the castle's trusted servants to take care of Uther.

And since they'd had a good talk like son and father which they'd never had enough of when Arthur was a child or even now Arthur decided to broach the subject his father wasn't very fond of talking about, somehow his thoughts about Merlin being with child would not go away and out of his head so it came to him to ask about his own mother, "Father, what was my mother like when she was with child?"

Uther looked stunned that he'd asked that of all things for a minute before he sighed. Arthur thought he was going to get a refusal like always but then Uther said "She was very agitated actually….though she was happy to be with child it was hard on her body….."

"She sang to you when you were in her womb…." Arthur's eyes shined with unshed tears as Uther quietly spoke about Ygraine, "She'd retch for hours for the first three months….could stomach nothing…even the smell of wine made her retch….the only thing she could keep down were biscuits, and after that she ate just about everything she could get her hands on….she called you Arthur ever since the day she felt you move inside her…..there could be no other name fit for her babe she said…"

"Oh and her moods were mercurial, she'd be so happy one moment filling the room with her bright laughter and burst into tears the next…..one time I had the audacity to laugh and she bit me off quite soundly…" Uther said it in amusement and looked rueful.

And then he turned to Arthur looked him straight and said "Nothing is more scarier than a pregnant woman Arthur, especially if you're the one who got them pregnant in the first place."

Arthur chucked along with Uther and they had dinner together before Arthur retired to his chambers bidding his father a good night.

Arthur may not give voice to his thoughts but the next day he crept up to Merlin's room with a tray filled with various biscuits and knick knacks he'd selected from the kitchens himself.

Arthur gave Gaius a brisk nod, Gaius was used to Arthur bringing Merlin food and waved him off and Arthur knocked before entering Merlin's room without waiting for Merlin's permission.

Arthur almost dropped the tray in shock when he found Merlin lying on his bed without a shirt on, his pale chest smattered with very light hair glowing in the morning light.

Arthur cleared his throat and said "Get decent Merlin"

Merlin only huffed and said "My chest is sore, I'm not wearing a shirt to please you, if you're disgusted you know where the door is!"

Arthur looked at Merlin's exposed chest and mid-section carefully and Arthur didn't know if he was imagining it or not but Merlin's stomach appeared rounder and protruding than the rest of his body which was all bones and skin what with his recent inability to digest anything.

And Merlin had said his chest was sore, as the days drew by Arthur couldn't help but think his conclusions as insane as they were could be right eventhough it was beyond unlikely.

"Here I brought you this….try and see if you can keep these down…"

Merlin glanced at the tray from his bed and frowned "They're biscuits Arthur"

"Yes Merlin, I happen to know, now stop stating the obvious and eat them."

"I don't want them, I hate biscuits."

"Merlin" Arthur said warningly, he'd feed Merlin by his hand if he had to, Merlin couldn't keep going on without nourishment, if Arthur's conclusion was remotely possible Arthur didn't want to think about the thought of Merlin having starved himself while he was….well that didn't bear thinking about.

However he knew forcing Merlin would only make him difficult and he tried to make his tone less ordering as he pleaded, "Come on Merlin….the cook recommended them when I told her you couldn't keep anything down…..everyone is worried about you….just try and eat atleast a little…"

Merlin looked at him then and relented sitting up and letting Arthur place the tray in front of him, he took one of the biscuits in his hand, gave it a nasty look like it had done something to offend him by just existing and then took a bite.

Slowly but surely Merlin finished the entire plate and miraculously he didn't seem to want to throw up, Arthur smiled at Merlin's recovering apatite having finally done something right though this did mean he had to talk to Gaius. So far Merlin seemed to be entirely oblivious to what might be the cause for his sickness and Arthur dreaded putting the possibility of it into Gaius' mind, but if he were right then it was better for all of them to know for sure.

That night Arthur confided to Gaius about his doubts and also about the night he'd shared with Merlin, to say Gaius looked absolutely angry with Arthur would be an understatement. Merlin was like a son to Gaius and the thought that Arthur had well…gone and buggered him silly, so much so that Merlin's symptoms sounded entirely too close to pregnancy made Gaius come down upon him in his anger like never before and Arthur had left feeling chastened and berated.

And since Gwaine and Lancelot who were knights Merlin was very close to were worried to the bone about him as well Arthur shared his thoughts with them too.

Lancelot looked astonished and then said "I suppose it's not such a farfetched thing sire, not where Merlin is concerned."

Arthur just thought he meant Merlin's particular peculiarity, Gwaine looked cagey but didn't say anything except, "I knew you'd buggered him princess….you could tone down the jealousy though…it's not like we're going to steal him from you."

"Oh really?" Arthur's tone was dry.

"I didn't mean me of course…"

"You do know I'll run you through if you ever try though right?" asked Arthur and he was not even kidding.

Gwaine put his hands up in surrender saying "You've claimed your territory quite without a doubt sire, but if you do break Merlin's heart I will break your bones…slowly and cruelly…."

Lancelot butted in with, "I'm not sure Arthur's going to escape Merlin's wrath when Gaius tells Merlin."

Lancelot and Gwaine now joined to taunt Arthur as Arthur gulped despite himself, he was dreading Merlin's reaction after all, it wasn't everyday you got your manservant who was a man pregnant, and Arthur was sure that was what it was now though Gaius had said that he had to do some basic tests to be sure.

The next morning dawned and Arthur as was customary now had his breakfast and brought Merlin his tray of biscuits from the kitchen. Gaius and Arthur had decided it was best to let Merlin finish his breakfast before they told him of their suspicions. Both of them knew Merlin would be inconsolable if it turned out that he was indeed pregnant.

Gwaine came by when Merlin was finished eating and Gaius called Merlin down.

"Hai Gwaine…how are you doing?"

"I'm fine Merlin, how are you?" asked Gwaine, it had been about two days since Gwaine last saw Merlin.

"I'm good; these biscuits Arthur brings are actually not making me throw up which is great." Merlin said smiling and the three of them held their collective breaths for when they'd have to burst Merlin's happy little bubble of ignorance.

"Come Merlin and lie down here" Gaius said pointing to the examination table, Gaius' tone was short and sharp and Merlin hastened to obey not wanting to irritate his mentor further though he looked bewildered, Arthur winced wondering if Gaius was unhappy with Merlin for having let Arthur have his wicked way with him, atleast he was assigning blame on both of them thought Arthur despairingly.

Gaius rolled up Merlin's shirt and put his ear to Merlin's navel, "Aww…Gaius…" Merlin giggled, "That tickles….stop…"

"Hush Merlin, I'm trying to make a diagnosis."

"So you actually have an idea of what's happening to me now?"

"Yes now shut up!" Gaius' tone was sharp and Merlin looked miserable, his lower lip trembling in a sign that said he wanted to cry but was controlling himself.

Arthur couldn't stop himself from saying "Leave him out of this Gaius, your quarrel is with me!"

Merlin opened his mouth again but thought better of it and closed it and Arthur seeing the obvious distress he was in couldn't help but go nearer, he ran his fingers through Merlin's hair and Merlin sighed smiling up at him, Arthur smiled back wondering when he'd become such a sap.

Gaius found some metal instrument which looked like a funnel and put it to Merlin's abdomen, his sharp intake of breath was all the confirmation Arthur needed but then Gaius took Merlin inside his rooms leaving out Gwaine and Arthur in the physician's chambers.

After what seemed like hours to Arthur, Gaius came down with a Merlin who was blushing quite heavily resembling a tomato and Arthur prodded "Well?"

Gaius rolled his eyes and then said looking at Merlin "My diagnosis Merlin is that you are pregnant."

Merlin didn't look amused, "WHAT?"

Gaius gave him a pointed look, "Since you were stupid enough to let Arthur take you without protection or even having the sense to not take his seed…."

"Gaius!" Arthur's tone was warning, he could only let Gaius take such privileges with Merlin for so long, he could see the whole situation was making Merlin distressed and all he wanted was to hold Merlin in his arms.

"But….I'm a man, are you….why are you saying such things? It's not possible! IT'S INSANE!"

Gaius finally turned sympathetic and held Merlin's eyes, "I'm afraid you are Merlin…."

Arthur had been prepared of course to hear it but even he had that niggling doubt that it was not possible.

Merlin turned to him saying "Arthur….Arthur…you don't believe this, do you?"

Merlin looked at him with such hope that Arthur had to turn away.

"Gwaine?"

Gwaine looked at his feet before saying as gently as he could, "I believe Gaius Merlin…"

Merlin blushed with the recollections of their one and only ill fated night together and noticed Arthur looking at him like he knew what he was thinking about. He then remembered Gaius' diagnosis and the predicament he was in.

Merlin glared and balled his fists and before Arthur could try and placate him he screamed "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!" before rushing past them all and into his room, slamming the door shut in their faces.

Arthur heard Merlin's sobs through the door and felt himself move but Gwaine held him back.

"Give him time princess"

Arthur didn't protest and walked out of Gaius' rooms as quickly as his feet would allow him and through the entire way his mind was protesting that he'd left Merlin in distress when he was carrying Arthur's child.

I'll be happy if you guys leave me a review, love amanda.