A/N: I've been working on this story over at AO3 and just realized I never posted it here. So...here you go! I hope you all enjoy!
At first it was bruises. His knees were decorated with them. Then his arms. He couldn't remember where they came from. He remembers telling his mom that his arms hurt. Remembered her looking down at the blue and black spots and pursing her lips in annoyance. She told him not to mention the bruises again. That they weren't important and she didn't want to hear, or see, anything else about it.
Tobio had been scared by the tone of her voice. So he had never talked to her about them again. He didn't mention them.
It was only about a year later that the writing began to appear. He had been playing in the main room of the house when his mother walked by him with a soft smile on her face. The smile had completely frozen as she stared down at his arm. Tobio had swallowed hard and followed her gaze.
Did it work?
Tobio stared at his arm in confusion. Did what work? And where did that come from?
He broke out of his thoughts as his mother suddenly grabbed his arm harshly. "Ow!" Tobio couldn't help but yell out. His mother's hold didn't loosen, however. No, instead it tightened and Tobio winced as her nails dug into his skin. He stood on shaking legs as his mother began to drag him toward his bedroom. "Okasan! Okasan!"
She didn't respond. When they finally reached his bedroom, she pulled him forward unsympathetically. "Who is it?" She hissed, her eyes snapping furiously. "I told you I didn't want to see anymore of that!"
"Of what?" He cried out as he rubbed furiously at his eyes. He was seven now. He wasn't supposed to cry.
"Cover it up!" His mother demanded heatedly. "Who is it? Who is contacting you? Did you meet them at school? At your club? Where?!"
"Meet who?" Tobio wailed out.
His mothers eyes flashed and her hand once again flew out. She grabbed his arm once again and pulled out his arm, baring the words that were written there. "This is what I am talking ab-" She broke off as she stared at his arm. Her grip lightened slowly until she finally let go all together.
Tobio pulled his arm against him instantly. He didn't know what he did to make her mad but he didn't want her to grab him again.
It hurt.
He watched as his mother stood up fully. She closed her eyes and sucked in a deep breath before letting it out slowly and opening her eyes. "Tobio, you must keep these words covered at all times. Do you understand me? These words will eventually disappear and new words will be there. You must not let anyone see them. Tell me you understand."
"Yes," Tobio muttered.
"No. Say it. Say you understand."
"I understand, Okasan."
His mother took another deep breath. "Fine. Now, I'm going to finish dinner. Cover those words up and come down."
Tobio didn't bother to look at her as she made her way out the door. He still had tears running down his face. His arm hurt. He didn't understand what had happened. Why did his mother do that? What did he do to make her angry?
He lifted his hands to his face and pushed his palms against his eyes. That really hurt! He didn't like it!
After a couple of minutes, Tobio slowly stood and grabbed a long sleeve shirt. He stripped off his current shirt and went to put on the new shirt. But something caught his attention. There were more words.
It works
Hey what did you do? My arm hurts
What did you do! I didn't do anything!
Whatever. Just stop it.
But I didn't do anything!
Tobio took a deep breath and quickly put his shirt on, making sure to pull the sleeves down as low as they could go before heading downstairs to eat.
He never spoke to his mother about the bruises, or the words, that decorated his body. He found out at school what the words meant. He was in elementary school when they covered the topic. A person was connected to their soulmate. The bond first manifested as being able to feel the other persons pain. The second part of the bond was when you would not only feel the pain, but you would also get the same injuries as our soulmate. Like bruises. The third stage of the bond was anything written or drawn on your body would appear on the other person. The fourth and final stage was being able to feel the other persons emotions.
Tobio was somehow in the third stage. However, from what he had learned, that wasn't possible. Soulmates stay in the first stage until they meet. Then they are in the second stage until they are able to 'connect' to the point where the third stage is reached. But Tobio had never met his soulmate. So how was he suddenly in the third stage?
For the first and probably last time, he snuck into the library and grabbed some of the pamphlets they had on soulmates. They didn't really tell him anything beyond what he already knew until he reached the section on polybonds.
In a polybond, the soulmate connection wasn't between only two people. The largest bond had a total of eight. But the important thing was that the first three stages could be reached without some of the soulmates having met. That was the reason he already had writing on his arm. His soulmates, at least two of them judging by the different handwriting, knew each other. And they had no idea that he existed. But they wouldn't be able to reach the fourth stage until they formed a "connection" with him as well.
He never told his mother that the words were the reason he decided to start volleyball in the first place. He had loved the game from the second he stepped foot onto the court but the reason he had decided to try was because his soulmates seemed to enjoy it so much. They were always talking about practice and things they were going to do during the games. Tobio had thought that maybe, just maybe, he would actually meet them if he started to play. And his mother would know nothing about it.
But when he started playing, when he realized that he had found something he loved, something he was good at, the thought of his soulmates began to take a backseat. It was after watching the games for the Junior High Schools that he decided to go to Kitagawa Daiichi. How could he not when he saw their setter?
Kageyama wanted to learn everything he possibly could from Oikawa Tooru. He was amazing. He had never seen someone like him before. He wanted to learn from him.
Too bad Oikawa didn't want to teach him.
"Aren't you hot, Kageyama?" Iwaizumi asked one day during practice.
Tobio looked down at the log sleeved shirt he wore under his practice jersey. "Uh, well…I'm fine," he muttered. Yes, he was hot. Yes, he wanted to just wear short sleeves like everyone else. But his mother had told him if she ever found out he had been walking around "showing those things off" she would make sure he would never be able to play again.
Iwaizumi didn't look convinced. "Alright. Whatever you say. If you start to feel lightheaded go sit on the bench, okay?"
Tobio nodded once to show he understood and Iwaizumi sent him one last concerned look before moving toward a clearly annoyed Oikawa. He sighed as he heard the third year complain to "Iwa-chan!" about hanging out with "that kid!".
He had never really realized that he had never really looked at the marks that decorated people's arms. Maybe it was because of the reaction his own marks had received. Maybe it was because they were such a common occurrence he just didn't really pay attention to them. But he was watching Oikawa practice setting to Iwaizumi one day when he heard the whispered conversation from Kindaichi and Kunimi.
"Apparently they've been at stage three for years now," Kindaichi whispered.
"Well, they have known each other since they were six," came Kunumi's usual drawl, "it makes sense that they would have a strong enough connection for that."
"I guess so," Kindaichi muttered. Tobio frowned at the tone of the other boys voice and he turned his head slightly so he could look at his face. Kindaichi was scowling with his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes narrowed. Tobio wondered if Kindaichi was upset that he had yet to reach the third stage with his soulmate. Or if he even knew who his soulmate was.
But Kunimi seemed to think it was something else. The sleepy boy muffled a chuckle behind his hand as his eyes flashed in amusement at his friend. "Upset that Iwaizumi-senpai isn't your soulmate? Your crush is just too cute!"
"Shut up!"
Tobio blinked and looked back to where Iwaizumi and Oikawa were practicing. For the first time, he noticed the writing that decorated their arms. Writing that looked to match. Ah. Oikawa and Iwaizumi were soulmates. No wonder they synched so well on the court. Maybe that would be him with his own soulmates one day. Maybe the three of them would make a perfect team.
He watched Oikawa and Iwaizumi even more closely after that. He wanted to see everything they did, see how they interacted with each other, so he would know what he was supposed to do when he finally met his own soulmates. He even tried to talk to Oikawa about it once. He thought that if he started by asking about volleyball he could get the third year to like him just a little bit. Then he could ask him if he thought he should write something on his arm to let his soulmates know he was there as well.
It was something he had been thinking about for awhile. The problem was that he could never let his mother know. He didn't know why his mother was always so upset when it came to soulmates but he knew she was completely serious about never allowing him to see them. And about taking away things he cared about. Like volleyball.
He was hoping that Oikawa would be able to give him some advice. He thought about asking Iwaizumi but the third year seemed to be just as straightforward as Tobio and Tibio didn't think that that would work in this scenario. Oikawa would probably come up with some sort of plan.
Too bad he never got to ask him.
Maybe he should have picked another day.
Instead, since he had finally been placed in a game, since he finally had his time on the court, he was so happy and excited that he thought luck just might be on his side. So he asked. He didn't think about the fact that Oikawa had been pulled from the game so Tobio could play.
Tobio supposed he should consider himself lucky that Iwaizumi had been there as well.
He did try again but Oikawa just made a face at him and walked away.
So there went that plan.
The third years graduated and Tobio became the official setter. He formed a friendship, or a kind of friendship, with Kunimi and Kindaichi. And he thought things were going well.
Until his mother met Noguchi-san.
He wasn't really sure how they met. He hadn't really cared, at first. But then his mother invited Noguchi-san over for dinner one night so Tobio could "get to know" him.
It was an awkward dinner with Tobio not knowing what to say or do. Noguchi-san seemed to be just as uncomfortable and his mother was sitting at the table with pinched lips, throwing Tobio glares every so often. He excused himself from the table as soon as he could and made his way back into this bedroom.
It was a little over an hour later when he left his room to get a glass of water. He had just stepped into the hall when he heard his mother and Noguchi-san speaking. He knew he shouldn't have done it but the second he heard his voice he had stopped moving.
"His father left me when I was pregnant," his mother said bitterly. Tobio frowned in confusion. His mother had always just said he didn't have a father. He assumed that meant his father had died. There wasn't any pictures of the man and his mother refused to talk about him. He didn't even know the man's name. "He told me he didn't care that we weren't soulmates. But that changed when he met the bimbo. Suddenly he couldn't get away fast enough. Said I would 'understand' when I met my own soulmate."
Was that the reason his mother hated soulmates so badly? Because of his nameless father? Because he had left her?
"I understand," Noguchi-san said calmly. Tobio's brow furrowed as the man continued to speak. "The same thing happened with my ex-wife. We were together throughout high school and married after we graduated. We were happy until she suddenly met her match when she was working. Then I was no longer good enough."
"It's ridiculous!" his mother snapped out. "You shouldn't base a relationship on that! There are plenty of people that aren't romantic with their soulmates and perfectly happy with other partners!"
"I agree with you," Noguchi-san sighed. "But that isn't why I'm saying that we shouldn't take this any further."
"It isn't?" his mother asked sardonically. "We were fine yesterday! Now you suddenly don't want to see me again? Then give me a reason other than you don't want me because I'm not your soulmate!"
There was silence for a moment and Tobio slowly moved forward. His mother had been seeing Noguchi-san? Why didn't she tell him?
Finally, Noguchi-san let out a deep sigh, "Honestly, I've never wanted to be a father. I was going to try because I care about you. But I just don't think that-"
"So it's that little brat," Tobio jerked back at the pure venom in his mother's voice. He had heard that tone before and it never ended well for him. Truthfully, the older he got the more he had tried to stay out of the house for long periods of time. His mother terrified him. "It's always his fault! He screwed up my entire life! If it wasn't for him-"
"Calm down, Ayame," Noguchi-san said softly as Tobio's jaw dropped when he heard his mothers given name. "He is your son."
"Unfortunately-"
Tobio didn't want to hear anymore. He quickly and silently made his way back into his room and shut the door. He leaned back against his closed door and took a deep, shaky breath. His father had left his mother because she wasn't his soulmate. His mother wants nothing to do with him. She blamed him. For everything.
Things began to get worse after that. Tobio felt like he was losing control. Of everything. His mother was almost never home and, when she was, she was always angry. Always yelling. Telling him he would never amount to anything. That the only thing he was good at was a game that wouldn't take him anywhere in life.
He started to throw himself into volleyball. His school marks were slipping. His mother was even more furious when she saw the marks. She threatened to make him quit the team. But she changed her mind when she decided volleyball was the only way he was going to get into a good high school as he "would never make it in with those brains".
He was named captain. He thought that maybe things were going to get better.
It was shortly before his third year that he came into the kitchen to find his mother waiting for him. Tobio had been surprised. She hadn't been home in two weeks. "Okasan?"
"Sit down, Tobio," she said, her voice soft for the first time in months.
Tobio slowly made his way toward the table. He slid into the seat across from her and watched her warily. She took a deep breath and then looked him straight in the eye. "Tobio, Noguchi and I are going to be married."
I've never wanted to be a father.
He knew he should say something. Should congratulate her. Should do something.
But what?
She let out a sigh, "You could at least congratulate me, Tobio."
"Congratulations," he responded automatically.
She scowled, "It doesn't count now," she let out a deep sigh and shook her head. "We're getting off track. Tobio, I will be moving into Noguchi's home."
I will be moving…
"And me?" Tobio asked, his throat feeling like it was closing in on itself. He wasn't even sure how the words had managed to make it out.
She stared at him with a blank face, "Tobio, you're old enough to survive without me. This house was gifted by your grandparents. I will give you a weekly allowance for food and other necessities. You can always contact me if anything else is needed. However, I think this arrangement will be the best for both of us."
Tobio stared at her. She was leaving him. She was moving on with her life.
She didn't want him in it.
He wasn't even sure when his mother left. He was staring at the table, his head swimming, and when he looked up, she was gone.
He didn't see her again. She didn't return to the house before the new term started. A week into the school year, he returned home to find most of her belongings no longer in the house and his "allowance" sitting on the kitchen table. The house now just contained his own things and whatever she had deemed to leave him.
He was alone.
He began to take comfort in the words that decorated his skin. He chuckled at the banter between his soulmates. He wondered how they would feel when they realized he was there. That he could see everything they were writing.
He wondered if they would be upset.
He threw himself into volleyball. He needed to be the best. It was obvious his mother wasn't going to help him in anyway. If he wanted to play in high school, if he wanted the chance to meet his soulmates and play on the same court as them, he was going to have to do it on his own.
He knew he was pushing too hard. He knew he was alienating the only two people that had ever given him a chance. It was like he was trapped inside his head. He knew what was happening, he knew he should stop, but he couldn't. It just kept happening. He was so irritated. Every time Kindaichi missed a spike, he heard his mothers voice telling him volleyball was all he was good for. Every time he saw Kunimi refuse to run toward a ball he saw his mothers reluctance to be around him.
He felt like he was slowly losing his mind.
And then it happened. He had finally pushed them too far. They turned their backs on him. His only friends. The game he loved. Abandoned once again.
He sat on the bench and looked up, not wanting to see them playing without him. That was when he saw them. Oikawa was staring at him in disgust. Iwaizumi was frowning and sent him what Tobio was sure was supposed to be a reassuring smile when he saw him looking. It came out as a grimace. His eyes flooded with tears. Yes, Oikawa had reason to be disgusted with him. So did Iwaizumi. Tobio had taken the team they built and single handedly destroyed whatever chance they had at the finals.
He would be disgusted with him as well.
He grabbed a towel and threw it over his face to hide his tears. He felt like his entire body was crumbling from the inside. It was official now. He had lost is chance. There was no way any team would be interested in him now. No way he would be able to find his soulmates and play with them. And even if he did find them, would they want him now? After everything he had done?
He was the last to leave the gym after the game. His team wanted nothing to do with him. His coach had just stared at him before following after them. He had moved slowly toward the door, ignoring the murmurs that followed after him. As soon as he stepped into the hall, he wished he had just stayed in the gym.
Oikawa was waiting. Iwaizumi was nowhere in sight. He was probably talking to the other third years. He wondered if he was aware that Oikawa had come to see Tobio.
"Poor King," Oikawa was in disgust, pushing himself away from the wall. Tobio flinched as the name passed Oikawa's lips. "Are you happy with what you have accomplished?"
Tobio clenched his jaw and forced his way past the bigger boy. He didn't want to do this. Oikawa had managed to ignore him for years. Why couldn't he continue doing so now?
But Oikawa wasn't going to let him get away easily.
He grabbed Tobio's shoulder and spun the other boy around. Tobio gasped as his back slammed against the wall. "Listen, Tobio-chan," Oikawa snapped. Tobio sucked in a sharp breath as Oikawa leaned closer and hissed in his ear. "I hope you are not considering going to Aobajōsai. You've already destroyed one of my teams. I'm not letting you destroy a second one."
Tobio's jaw clenched as Oikawa pulled away and gave him one last scowl. "You might be a great setter, Tobio-chan. But if you continue down this path you will never amount to anything. Remember that."