His face was on fire.
Pain burned all through his body, hot coursing pain in his face, his shoulder, his side. Cold dull pain at his back as the snow slowly seeped through his robes to numb his skin. The smell of burned flesh filled the air.
He reached up to feel the seared skin on his face and screamed, channeling the pain into rage. Using that rage to gather the force around him, he sent a message to the ship.
General Hux looked down at the screen as it flickered. Once, twice, and on the third flicker coordinates appeared on the screen.
"We have his location. Proceed captain, and quickly. Make the jump as soon as he is secured."
Captain Orbin nodded and punched in the coordinates. Flying quickly they reached the spot where Kylo Ren was sprawled in the snow, blood pooling from the bowcaster wound in his side. Stormtroopers were deployed and brought the wounded knight onboard.
Orbin looked to the General to confirm his orders. They were truly going to jump? Not making any attempt to take any other personnel off the collapsing planet? General Hux made cold eye contact.
"Is there a problem with your orders captain?"
My friends are still planet side. Thought Orbin, thankful that his helmet shielded the fear in his eyes. Outwardly his voice was calm, "No sir, just double checking coordinates."
He punched the button and made the jump to hyperspace. Though he couldn't see it, Orbin could imagine the planet, wreathed in flames. Breaking apart to form a new sun.
A stormtrooper entered the control room.
"General Hux, orders regarding Ren?"
Though Hux wanted nothing more than to dump the annoyance on the furthest planet possible and fly away, he knew Supreme Commander Snoke would take issue with that plan.
"He has standing orders for any recovery to be done in a Bacta Tank." Said General Hux dismissively. Though Ren had explained previously that the meditative healing quality of the Bacta Tank actually allowed him to use the force for quicker and stronger recovery, Hux still couldn't understand why anyone would prefer an outdated medical technology to the advancements currently available. Regardless, it was Ren's choice if he wanted to receive sub-optimal medical care, and if something went wrong, well, that was his own fault. The stormtrooper nodded to the general and left quickly.
"Do you think he can hear us?" Asked Poe, as he looked down at the prone body of Finn, laid out on the Medi-slab. Concern etched lines in his handsome face.
"We can't be sure." Answered the Doctor, shrugging briefly. "Its possible, and it may even be likely. We've put him into an induced coma to speed his recovery time. Most coma patients can at least sense the company, if not remember what they have heard." She examined Finn's chart. "His wounds are extensive, but treatable. He's likely to make a full recovery, it'll just take some time." She replaced his chart and left to examine the other patients in the Med Bay.
Poe nodded mostly to himself, feeling relieved. Rey managed a shaky smile. Her eyes were filled with tears and her hands were still shaking with adrenaline, despite the fact that it had been hours since they touched down at the rebel base. He gripped her shoulder in what he hoped was a reassuring way. She stiffened at the contact and he remembered that she wasn't quite used to being around people. He loosed his grip, began to pull his hand away but she brought her own up to cover it and held it there, squeezing his hand slightly. Her eyes were sad.
"I have to go." She said. "I have to find Master Skywalker." She looked down at Finn. "I don't…I don't want to leave him like this."
He nodded, understanding the sentiment entirely. Just looking down at Finn, laying there, immobile, brought a strange, new ache to his chest.
"You'll watch him?" Rey asked, half sitting, half collapsing into a chair next to the slab.
"Of course." He smiled, laughing slightly. "Not that he looks like he's going anywhere in a hurry." Poe took a seat in the chair on the other side of the slab. Realizing it might not be the best time for jokes, something that was notoriously hard for him to realize, he took a more serious track. "He's safe with me."
Poe studied Rey's face as she watched Finn, she seemed resolved somehow. Determined. He knew she would be back soon, that if anyone could find Skywalker and bring him back, it would be Rey.
"I'll be back. As soon as I can."
She left. Off to prep the Millenium Falcon with Chewie for the trip.
Finn, or rather, some part of Finn's consciousness, floated, weightless. It was impossible to tell how much time had passed.
Every so often he could hear snippets of voices, Poe's, General Organa's. On one level he could feel himself tethered to his body, on another level nothing but an infinite void stretched in front of him. Mostly empty, but dotted with bright points.
One point, brighter than the others and tinted red, seemed to be moving toward him. As he watched it neared, hurtling closer and closer, until it seemed that it would crash into him. Panicked, he tried to move away, but couldn't. He had no control over his body, or maybe his consciousness? He wasn't sure what part of him was experiencing these sensations exactly. Maybe this was the force? He still hadn't managed to get a straight answer out of anyone regarding what it was supposed to do exactly.
The light crashed into Finn. For a moment he was filled with a white-hot rage, stronger than any he had ever felt, and then, nothing. His head felt full somehow. Like something was pressing on him. It was hard to explain, but then again, there was no one to explain it to.
If he strained he could hear General Organa's voice above him. She was talking to Poe. They were talking about…it was difficult to make out through whatever haze seemed to be controlling his senses…him. He felt a surge of joy and then a smaller, distant surge of something else. Pity? That was strange. He focused on listening to the conversation. The fact that two people that he admired would bother to sit there with him as he recovered astounded him. He had some other troopers he might go so far to call friends on board the Finalizer, but when things got dicey orders were orders. There was no time to sit by a friend's bedside- if Captain Phasma caught you shirking your duties there weren't a lot of questions asked, just a quick ejection through a nearby airlock. After all Stormtroopers were a credit a dozen. That kind of mentality didn't lead itself to lasting connections.
"Good to see you General." That was Poe's voice.
"Poe I've told you before to call me Leia."
He shrugged, "It doesn't seem right somehow." She glared at him, he backtracked quickly. "But I will do my best General"- he realized his mistake- "Leia." He finished with a cheeky grin. It felt wrong to address the leader of the resistance so informally, but it was fun too.
"Its kind of you to visit."
"Its really no trouble Poe. You ought to take the occasional break. It's been almost a week now since Rey and Chewie left and I've heard that you've spent most of it here."
Finn felt a surge of emotion, centered somewhere in his chest, at the thought that Poe had been spending so much time at his side. Oddly, after that first surge of emotion, he felt a second, delayed feeling, a sort of anger, welling up inside him. It didn't feel like it was coming from him. It felt somehow like he was subject to a stranger's emotion.
"Its not good to be so isolated." She paused then, realizing that a mere suggestion might not be strong enough to make Poe rest. He seemed to feel a sort of responsibility for Finn.
"You know, I could use your help with something actually." Leia said.
That feeling of fullness in Finn's head increased at the sound of her voice, it was as though there was someone else in his head with him. Whatever it was the sound of the General's voice seemed to have an agitating affect on it.
What is going on? Finn asked himself. The presence reacted with surprise.
You can sense my presence? A dark voice spoke in Finn's head.
Finn recognized that voice. Fear, conditioned through years of Stormtrooper training welled up in him. He felt like he was choking.
Lord Ren? He asked hesitantly. He realized his mistake immediately after asking. You're not a trooper anymore Finn. No respect for monsters here. Ben Solo? Is that you?
That got a reaction; a quick surge of rage. Kylo Ren didn't seem to realize that it wasn't just his thoughts he was projecting through whatever bond this was, but his emotions as well.
Why are you in my head? …How are you in my head? Finn tried to remain calm. Try to get him talking. Maybe there was something he could learn from this interaction as well. Maybe Ren would give up something interesting.
I needed to hear what was happening. You are a suitable conduit. Ren's voice pounded through his head. Now, where is she?
Your mother? Asked Finn, confused, You're hearing her right now.
No. Not her.
Rey? Finn asked. He felt relieved for the first time that she was gone. He didn't want to feel whatever hatred Ren would feel when he heard her voice. She's not here. You're too late. She's already on her way to find Master Skywalker. The next time she faces you she'll be strong enough to kill you.
Ren laughed, a low chuckle that echoed around Finn's head. He paused, and Finn got the impression that he was listening to the conversation taking place above them. I doubt that. They wont be away for much longer. She's planning to bring him back here. Ren's voice continued smugly. And now I know when. I guess my father was more useful than I realized.
Unaware of the mental conversation taking place below her, Leia continued. "Poe, some of the pilots in your unit are Corellian, right?" She seemed hesitant to ask, embarrassed almost.
Poe nodded, "Yeah, I think there's maybe two in my squad? But Tatan might have been born off-world. I don't know that he's actually been to Corellia."
"Would you…would you ask them if there are any special Corellian Remembrance traditions?" Her shoulders sagged a bit. Poe realized this was the first time he had ever seen her look tired. She always seemed so strong, so together. "Han and I… we never discussed it, you know? We should have, but we went through so much, I guess it always just felt like we would go on forever. And I don't think Chewie will be back in time to help with the preparations, though I'm sure he would know what Han wants…would have wanted…" She trailed off a moment before collecting herself.
"I've heard from my brother as well. I'd been hoping, I mean, I knew he would want to come, and we can't have the Remembrance itself without Chewie of course. They'll be back in two weeks. So it seems like I'll need to start the preparations as soon as possible."
Poe nodded. "I'm happy to help in any way I can General. Ill talk to my squad and get back to you as soon as I can." Equipped with a mission, he left. It wasn't until he was out of the medi-bay that he realized that by asking him for his help instead of forcing him to take a break for his own good she had successfully got him to leave without complaint. He smiled to himself and shook his head.
You still in here? Asked Finn.
Yes. Came the reply.
Well get out. Stop spying on us. You have what you came for anyway.
I'm not done yet. He chuckled. Don't you like betraying your new friends? Two times a traitor now. How long do you think they'll let you stay once they find out what you did?
Faces flashed through Finn's mind. Poe his expression of hurt turning to slowly to hatred. General Organa's face filled with rage. Rey, with her eyes bright and her smile wide, that smile slowly fading, fading into anger and sadness.
Stop doing that. Finn cried. He was answered by more laughter.
That's not me. That's your own fear. Embrace it. They will never accept you. You're the enemy. A traitor. You might as well leave now, return to the first order. If you help me with this next step, they might even take you back.
Finn thought of Rey. The fierce determination in her face. Of Poe, charming, sweet, willing to accept the help of a Stormtrooper he didn't know, willing to gamble on a friend.
No.
You think their love will save you. It won't. You can't change what you are.
No one was there to see it, but Finn clenched his fists.
Why not? You did.
He could feel that Ren was taken aback slightly.
That's right, I'm not the only traitor here, am I? Continued Finn. This could have been you, but you walked away. You betrayed them all. Your own family…
Suddenly he was alone in his own head. Heart pounding, he opened his eyes and sat up.