Disclaimer: I own nothing but the writing and my thoughts. Everything else is Orange is the New Black and from the amazing show that it is.
A Vow to Protect
Nicky couldn't deal with Gina's shit right now. How could she have been so unsubtle about hiding the heroin? She stood quickly and walked past Gina, scowling at her.
'Don't you fucking follow me Gina, I mean it!' Nicky knew she should take the drugs to Red but she couldn't bring herself to do it right now. It wasn't only the temptation, but she was so worried Red would disown her after this. And she was way too fucking proud for her own good – and giving the heroin up to Red would take a huge chunk of her pride. She didn't have a plan of where to go but her legs seemed to subconsciously take her to the visitation room window. She couldn't resist peering through. Curiosity got the better of her – she wanted to know why Lorna had been acting odd lately. She never spoke about her fucking wedding to Christopher anymore – which suited Nicky just fine. But it was still odd. Nicky clearly remembers when Lorna cried her heart out because Christopher was marrying someone else. But why was she still pretending it was going on?
She peered through the window. The room was mostly empty, only a few women in the room with their visitors. She was expecting to see her sat opposite a woman since Lorna herself had assumed it would be her sister. Instead she saw a man sat opposite Lorna. It had to be Christopher; he looked exactly like she had told everyone. She felt her chest go tight but she had to be good to Lorna. They had been on better terms recently, and she didn't want to ruin it and go back to making horrible remarks to her like she had done after Lorna stopped the sex.
She took a deep breath and knocked on the window, a smile on her face. Lorna turned in her seat, her eyes catching onto Nicky's. 'Is that him?' Nicky mouthed through the glass, pointing at the man. Lorna sunk in her seat, her hand over her head and nodded quickly. Looking back at the infamous Christopher, Nicky saw him look from Lorna to Nicky herself and then back again. It entered Nicky's mind that she didn't even register their facial expressions before knocking on the window. She just went ahead and interrupted – and looking at the situation clearly now, she regretted it.
Christopher looked incredulous.
'What is that? Are you trying to keep up this lunatic charade? Pretend that I'm your boyfriend?' Nicky's heart sunk as she saw and heard him yell at her friend. He looked so angry but frightened too which really hit Nicky hard. No one ever looked frightened because of Lorna. Lorna shrunk into herself even more than before. She was shaking her head and Nicky could faintly hear her saying 'No'. Nicky jumped a little as Christopher stood up quickly, scanning the room.
'I don't know this woman, okay?' Nicky felt sick, her eyes flicking between Lorna and Christopher. This was fucking messed up, even for Nicky herself to comprehend. 'We went on one date. One. She's a fucking stalker.' Nickys insides went cold. Little Lorna Morello, a stalker? Unthreatening, Red had called her when Nicky confronted the cook about her WAC pick. The guard pulled him away and she saw Lorna flinch away from him as he passed her. Nicky didn't know where to look. The other people in the room – prisoners and visitors alike – were all staring open mouthed at either the yelling Christopher being pushed out of the room by the CO or at the shaking Morello, tripping over her chair in her haste to get out. Wherever anyone's attention was visually, Christopher's shouting voice was impossible to ignore. Nicky suddenly realised that other prisoners walking by would hear him, but she couldn't look around to see who was there. She couldn't bring herself to look away from Christopher.
'She's fucking dangerous. You know she broke out of here to stalk me? She's a psycho bitch. I'm not the criminal here.' He was still shouting as he left the room, the guard guiding him out the doorway. Pushing the chair upright, Lorna apologised to a visitor sat nearby. She backed against the wall locking eyes with Nicky. Nicky could tell her mouth was open in shock, and her face must not have been a comforting one for Lorna to look at. Lorna tried to smile to her, as though everything was still as normal. Nicky couldn't bring herself to smile back – she was too shocked and couldn't snap out of it for the small woman. Lorna ran out of the room, giving up the self-preservation act and breaking down. Letting out a sigh and forcing herself to move from the window, Nicky followed the way Lorna had run. Walking as fast as she could under the scrutiny of the CO's, she scanned all the corridors and rooms.
She reached the Suburbs and checked out Lorna's cube. She wasn't there. Nicky began to worry, even though she knew Lorna wasn't about to do anything stupid. She wasn't like Nicky or others in prison who would harm themselves or shut it out with drugs. But she was clearly torturing herself in her head. Nicky just wanted to comfort her and speak to her. You're going soft, Nichols, she thought to herself. Running a hand through her mess of hair (a nervous habit of hers) she turned and wondered where to go next. The chapel? Convinced she would find her there, she walked the route she knew so well and let her mind drift to what had happened, processing properly what had happened.
She always knew the wedding was a little bit fantasised, but she had no idea it was never reality. Why did she feel the need to make it up? A realisation occurred to Nicky as she reached the chapel. Lorna didn't get a 34 month sentence for mail fraud. He called it a 'lunatic charade'. She must be in for stalking.
She sighed as she left the empty chapel, and then glimpsed her around the corner. 'Lorna! Wait!' Nicky ran, luckily no CO's were nearby. Grabbing her arm, she pulled her around to face her on the stairs.
Lorna sank to the ground and Nicky positioned herself at her side. Lorna couldn't stop crying. Nicky softly stroked the small woman's back, watching as the sobs ripped from her throat, tears raining down her pretty face. All of a sudden, the sounds quietened.
'I'm crazy. I'm a crazy person. There's something really wrong with me.' Her voice caught on the last word and she began to cry again. Nicky had never seen her so distraught, not even after she found out Christopher was marrying somebody else. At a loss of what to say, she tried to reassure the girl she wasn't crazy.
'There's something wrong with all of us, otherwise we wouldn't be in here.' Nicky began rubbing Lorna's neck. She could feel her pulse, much quicker than it should be because of all the upset. Lorna shifted, facing her body towards Nicky, looking into her eyes properly for the first time since they had been sat there.
'No, I did something bad. Really bad.' Nicky frowned at her, another sickly feeling filling her up. Lorna's voice became barely more than a whisper. 'When I was supposed to be at the hospital, I stole the van and I went to his house in Albany.' Nicky gripped her hand slightly tighter on Lorna. She could feel her own face tighten in disbelief and slight anger at how stupid the girl could be.
'Are you serious?' Lorna nodded. 'Do you know what could happen if you got caught? You get charged with felony escape, triple your sentence.'
'I know, believe me I know.' Nicky couldn't believe what she was hearing.
'Don't fucking do that again you maniac. It a miracle, that you didn't get caught.' Nicky let out a nervous laugh, so relieved she hadn't been caught. She pushed the anger she felt earlier aside. The poor girl clearly wasn't in the right state of mind to make rational decisions. Lorna nodded a little.
'I just wanted to see him. But he's so mean. Like, he's really mean.' She looked completely heartbroken. 'He's not the man that I thought he was.' She began to cry again. Nicky felt so bad for her yet so confused. Lorna was obviously not in a good mental state. She believed she was going to marry this guy and she still thought that he should be a good guy to her, even though she had only met him once apparently. She felt Lorna grab her arms. She looked traumatised, even more worried than before.
'Do you hate me?' Nicky couldn't help but let out a shaky laugh.
'No I don't hate you' Lorna smiled a little, clearly relieved. 'It's getting clearer every second that you are totally bat shit crazy.' Nicky brought her hand up a little to hold her small face. 'But you're a beautiful, sweet girl.' Lorna smiled a little. 'Fuck this guy! So many people are gonna love you.' Nicky's voice nearly broke. So many people who you will want to love you, she thought. Lorna shook her head.
'No. No.' She looked down. 'Nobody's gonna love me.' Nicky swallowed. She actually believed she was unlovable.
'I do.' Nicky froze as the words left her mouth. Lorna looked up at her. They locked eyes for a few seconds until Lorna ducked her head and lay on Nicky. She put her arms around Lorna, her face frowning. How could Lorna be so fucked up? Nicky knew that she would have to take care of her now – it was bound to go around the prison that Morello was a deranged lunatic who faked her whole wedding. She prayed it wouldn't be too bad. Lorna was never really a target of anybody – she was too nice to everyone to make enemies and she never made a scene or outwardly hated others.
Maybe this might slip under the radar, depending on who heard of course.
The small girl's body was still shaking with sobs, her hands gripping Nicky tightly. Nicky held her even closer to herself, wanting to protect her friend as much as she possibly could. This was raw, genuine emotion that she knew full well Lorna would not show to anybody else and Nicky made a vow to herself - to make sure to protect Lorna and at least try and help her mental state.
Things were going to be a lot different now.
Authors Note: This is the first time I've ever actually published any fanfiction, so hope it's okay! I'm planning on writing original one shots rather than basing them rigidly around a scene from the show like this one. But Lorna and Nicky will be the death of me, I ship them so much and wish there were more fics out there of them!