So it's been over five years and I just decided to do some big time editing. Why? Because I've been reading it over and felt like it; plus my style has improved since then. The plot will not change but paragraphs will be flushed out and I will do better at explaining things. I will also try to fix the Mary-Sue stuff that appear. Some things will be somewhat "eh" here and there, as I do still experience writers block (and there are things I forget to edit), but I think it's MUCH better than the other two versions. Let me know what you think; including spelling mistakes or things that can be better worded; it will help me better improve for the future.
~Normal P.O.V~
My names is Ashlen Cook. I am a 5'7 sixteen year old girl with long curly brown hair and green eyes. Due to a string of events I am an orphan who has lived on her own for the past six years. I don't know who my parents are but have been told they abandoned me when I was only one years old. I have no idea if this is true or not but either way I only spent four years in the orphanage before being adopted.
The family that took me in happened to be rather rich and they already had a ten year old son. At first, like most little kids, I was happy to have a new home and I even liked the idea of having an older brother. Unfortunately, they didn't treat me very well. The family was rather cruel and cold hearted; the kind of rich people who believed they were better than others. I believe because I was a poor girl and not biologically related to them they considered me more of a servant than their daughter. I was never really beaten but I was mentally and physically abused, as well as harassed, until the family died in a car crash four years later, when I was ten.
To say I was sad about their deaths would be a lie. They never really loved me and treated certain servants better than me. I mean, they did provide me with clothes, toys and schooling but the emotion behind their supposed loved was never there. The only good thing that I got out of that family was I inherited their house and everything in it; though only because they had no other family to take it. It kept me from going back to the orphanage but needless to say, all the servants left; not wanting to take orders from a ten year old.
So to this day I've lived alone in a huge, three story house; five if you included the basement and attic. There have been times where I've considered selling the mansion and moving into something smaller. Plenty of people would love a house like this and I don't think I'd have a hard time getting it off my hands. Yet, I am only sixteen and who'd sell a house to someone like me? Not that many people, I'll tell you. Well, at least I have all the money my 'parents' left behind; aside from what the bank takes for bills every month.
Anyways, the afternoon started like any other. I was on my way home from school when my stomach growled. Stopping, I looked at my surroundings and saw I had reached a small park, which I deemed a halfway mark. Feeling it growl again I remembered the lunch I hadn't touched that day, having been too caught up in my studies, and decided now was as good of time to eat. So I made my way to the nearest free bench I could find, took off my backpack and sat down.
As I started to eat my sandwich I decided to take a better look at my surroundings. Not many others were at the park today, just an old couple feeding birds at another bench, but I was in perfect view of the street. Like most days vehicles drove past, some going a little fast, and people were walking down the sidewalks. Most were looking down at their cellphones though seemed aware enough not to walk into the busy traffic. Just as I decided I had enough people watching I heard a man shout from my left.
"Hey, stop that mutt!" When I turned to see what was going on I was surprised to see a large blue dog stealing from a hot dog cart; a string of sausages dangling behind it.
I watched, stunned, as the man chased after the dog until the animal ran across the busy street, somehow managing to dodge all the passing cars. Though I could not hear him, I'm pretty sure the vendor cursed before returning to his cart. I, however, couldn't get my mind off the blue dog and my curiosity grew stronger by the second. After a minute had passed I could no longer contain my curiosity so I packed up the rest of my lunch and jogged to the closest crosswalk.
Once the traffic light turned red, and in addition the crosswalk flashed to the white walking man, I quickly ran to the other side. Though a minute had passed, and the dog could technically be anywhere, I had seen the last place it ran. With any luck I'd find the dog still there; though I'm unsure if that alley is a dead end or not. Taking that chance I ignored anyone who could be watching me and made my way for the alley I saw the blue dog run into. It only took a few seconds until I began to hear the barking; coming from more than one dog.
Cautious, I slowly made my way deeper into the alley. As I did the barking got louder and it became very obvious there were more than two or three. I didn't have to wonder about it for long as the dogs soon came into view. There were ten of them and, to my upmost surprise, most were just as odd looking as the large blue one, who was sharing the string of hot dogs with the others.
The first dog, aside from the blue one, to catch my attention, was half black and half white; split right down the middle. Even its tail was like this. Standing next to it was an almost normal looking black dog. The only thing weird seemed to be that its face was a bright orange color; far more orange that should be natural for dogs.
The next dog I turned my gaze too looked somewhat like a tiger. It wasn't that it looked like a cat but in that its entire body was orange but had black stripes that went everywhere. Even on its face and down his tail. The dog next to it looked to be a purplish blue poodle, which screamed female to me. If it wasn't, I pitied the poor boy for being dyed such a girly color.
Standing next to the blue dog I saw one of the most normal looking in the group. It looked to be a normal black lab. It had no strange markings like the others and, well, almost seemed out of place amongst the strange dogs. However, from where I stood, I could see that its eyes were an odd red color. I'd have to get closer to make sure it were the eyes themselves and not some kind of infection.
Another normal looking dog looked to be a golden retriever. The only thing odd about it, though I honestly found it kind of cute, was some of the fur on its head had grown so long it flopped forwards and hung over its left eye. Beside this dog was a red furred dog and, unlike the others, it was barely eating at all. Instead the dog only took small nibbles, as if it was nervous about something.
The last of the normal looking dogs was a silver furred wolf. Or at least, it looked kind of wolfish; especially with the way it was gobbling its share of the sausages. I could tell right away that this one wouldn't hesitate to attack me if it noticed me. Though I was unsure of the dogs' genders, aside from the poodle, I got the strong sense this one was male.
Despite the oddness of the others, the last of the dogs surprised me the most. It was a pit bull and very obvious that it was either used for dog fights or just owned by horrible people. Scars covered every inch of its body, including around its face. The scars looked really ugly and alarming against the light brown, or tanned, fur. I couldn't help but feel very sorry for it.
Without realizing it, I must have stepped on a twig or made some kind of sound because, the next thing I knew, all the dogs turned to look at me. They all stopped barking and for a moment nothing happened. That changed very quickly as some of the dogs began to growl, their sharp teeth bared at me threateningly. I gulped nervously and slowly backed up to try to show them I wasn't a threat but the silver dog began to advance on me.
"Ahhhh!" I screamed as the dog jumped at me, causing me to fall backwards from fear and the weight of his body. I landed hard on my back but ignored the pain as I stared the angry dog in the eye. Before he could bite me a rope latched around his neck; a rope that was attached to a poll.
"Ha! Finally caught the son of a bitch!" A guy's voice said and I looked over to see a man gripping the other end of the pole. Looking past him I noticed a few more dog catchers, who were all rounding up the other dogs.
"Are you alright, Ms? This mutt didn't hurt you, did he?" The man that saved me asked, doing his best to keep the struggling dog back. It took me a few seconds to register what had just happened but, when I did, I nodded and push myself back to my feet.
"I'm fine. Thank you for saving me." I answered, offering the man a small smile before looking to the dogs. Though the silver one could have seriously hurt me, I felt a pang of sadness in my heart watching them being dragged away.
"What's going to happen to the dogs?" I asked as I looked back to the man that was somehow managing to keep the silver one not only away from me but from biting his leg. To my question the man frowned and began to forcefully pull the dog to a waiting animal control van.
"I'm not sure about the others but this one will likely be put down. He's far too violent and reports state he's been seen killing other animals. In fact, I'm rather surprised to learn he's part of this pack." He answered, roughly yanking on the poll as the silver dog continued to struggle. It made me a bit upset that he was being so rough but, upon learning that this dog has killed, I took a step away.
"So does that mean you're taking them to the pound?" I asked, highly impressed as he manages to get the dog in the van without being bit. The man nodded and turned to me after locking the door; trapping the ten dogs inside.
"Yes, so they can't attack or bother anyone else again. Have a good day, Ms. And try to be a little more careful from now on." The man told me with a tip of his white, uniformed hat before getting into the drivers seat and drove off.
I stood there for a few seconds, just watching the direction the van drove in. More people passed by, oblivious to what just happened in the alley behind me. My heart thumped heavily and I bit my bottom lip. What should I do?
~Akatsuki's P.O.V/Third person~
"When I get the fuck out of here I'm going to rip out your Jashin damned throats and sacrifice the lot of you!" Hidan yelled and snarled as he continuously slammed his body against the cage he and the others were put in. The bars barely budged each time he did this but that didn't stop him from doing it over and over again.
For the first little while, the rest of the Akatsuki ignored this. They too wished to get out of the cage, though not all of them would stoop to such vulgar death threats. Oh, they still wished for revenge on those that dared lock them up and some even envisioned how they'd kill them. Unlike Hidan, however, they knew slamming oneself against metal bars repeatedly would get nothing done; and after the dozenth time he did it, it began to seriously get on their last nerve.
"Hidan, shut up; you're being annoying!" Kakuzu, Hidan's partner, snapped with a growl and bared his fangs. "Besides, how do you expect to sacrifice anyone while you are still a dog, idiot?" Hidan slammed his body against the cage once more before turning his head around and growled back at Kakuzu.
"Fuck off, you mother fucking bastard! I've already proven I am more than capable of killing in this form. Including people." He snarled, remembering all the animals and the one drunk man he managed to kill not that long ago.
Without giving the heart thief a chance to respond, the Jashinist jumped at him; sinking his fangs in his neck. Growling angrily, Kakuzu retaliated and a vicious fight between the two quickly broke out. Quite a bit of blood was spilled as the two slashed and bit at each other; some of it nearly landing on those unfortunate to be close enough. Fortunately, the fight didn't manage to get very far before it was abruptly stopped.
"Enough! Keep it up and these humans will kill us for sure. We are not as powerful as we were before in these forms. We can be killed!" Pein, the normally calm and collected leader, angrily snarled, his own fangs bared threateningly. The two immortals begrudging pulled away from each other and looked to the Akatsuki leader but not without narrowing their eyes to glare at each other.
"Pein, someone's coming." Konan announced, gently nudging the tiger like dog and pointed out the cage with her paw. Silence filled the cage and, through the loud barks that came from the other dogs in the pound, everyone soon heard the light taps of shoes. Someone was indeed coming.
"Maybe it's the man that wants to kill Hidan, yeah." Deidara suggested, recalling how he overheard the one dog catcher mention it back in the alley. Also having overheard the conversation the others become curious about that though Hidan just laughed.
"Ha! I'd like to see the fucker try. I would love to see the look on his face when he realizes I can't die." The Jashinist barked, his laughter becoming maniacal. The rest of the Akatsuki simply either sighed, rolled their eyes or didn't react at all as they all waited for the person to show themselves.
~Normal P.O.V/Ten minutes earlier~
Only a couple minutes had passed before I made up my mind on what to do. Breaking into a run, I hurried over to the pound; trying to be mindful not to bump into anyone passing by. Despite being warned that those dogs were dangerous, I couldn't let them die. Not even the one that tried to hurt me. It's not their fault they're the way they are. It's the fault of whoever mistreated them. To punish them by ending their lives is cruel. Besides, if properly trained, I bet they'd make awesome guard dogs.
I have an unusual amount of enemies; both people my age and adults as old as their late forties. The people my age are jealous about my insane amount of money and have tried to become my friend to get at it. Fortunately I am smart enough to notice this, though I did have to learn it the hard way. Others that didn't try to be friends were just usually cruel, bitchy jerks who liked being mean for reasons I'm unsure of.
When it comes to the adults, most were honestly just bankers, social workers or the foster care system. None of them thought I should be living alone and have tried to intervene ever since the death of my 'adoptive family.' In all honesty I can understand why but I had no intentions on returning to the orphanage and I knew how to take pretty good care of myself at that point; I even knew how to use the oven and stove for certain things. When it comes to the bank, however, I'm on an autopay system so I'm pretty sure they are trying to cheat me out of the millions I inherited.
By the time I reached the pound, I was out of breath and my legs were sore. I had run nun-stop and almost crashed into a few people. I apologized each time it happened but hadn't stuck around to see if they forgave me or not. Anyways, before entering the building, I decided to let myself rest for a moment; just long enough to catch my breath and so it wouldn't be obvious I had run all the way here.
"Good afternoon, Ms. Do you need help looking for something?" A woman with pigtailed black hair asked from behind the counter when I walked in, giving me a kind smile. I smiled back and walked over to her.
"Yes. I'm looking for the ten dogs that would have been brought in not too long ago." I answered, noting that the woman's name was Lisa from the tag on her uniform. Her smile quickly fell and she looked somewhere between surprised and concerned.
"I'm sorry, but I really don't recommend those dogs. One of them is scheduled to be put down in a few days and we still need to test to see if the others are safe." She told me though didn't look all that upset about it. Frowning, I slung off my backpack, opened one of the side pockets and took out some cash I had on me.
"I'll give you three thousand for all the dogs." I told her, slapping the money on the counter to show her. Unsurprisingly she looked shocked, obviously having not expected me to have so much money. The only reason I did is because I sometimes liked to go shopping after school, especially if I'm low on groceries. Other times I'll give some money to the homeless if I pass by some. I never know how much money I'd end up spending so I always take an excessive amount with me, just in case.
"Please let me have them. Even the one that's scheduled for death; I'll take full responsibility for them." I promise, basically begging the woman into giving me the dogs. She looked reluctant but eventually gave in and sighed before placing the money in the register.
"Alright, but I'll need you to sign a release form claiming responsibility over the dogs. After that we can't be held responsible if they hurt someone." She told me, pulling out the form from behind the desk. Reading it over, I saw it looked simple enough and signed both my name and address with the pen she gave me before giving both back.
"Thank you." Lisa chirped, her smile back in full force as she took the form and put it somewhere behind the desk. "The dogs are in the back. Just enter the room on the left and you should have no trouble finding them."
With a smile of my own, I thanked the woman and made my way to where she told me the dogs would be. Since the front of the store is rather small, having only a few shelves of food and leashes, it wasn't hard to find the door that would lead to the dogs. There was a second door to my right though a sign above it labelled it as where they kept the cats.
The minute I opened the door I was greeted with an abundance of barking and growling. The cages closest to me were empty but I could see dogs in pretty much the rest of them. They were decent sized cages too; large enough to fit several dogs with room to spare. Each cage also had large food and water dishes in the far corner. Heck, I even noticed pee pads; most of which were dirty and would likely need to be changed soon.
Most of the dogs barked at me as I passed by, some even jumping at the cage bars in attempts to get my attention. Some of the dogs were wearing collars, which told me their owners were either paying the pound to hold them for some reason or they ran away, or got lost, and were waiting to be picked up. Most, however, had no identification tags that I could see. These are the ones I found trying the hardest to get my attention; as if begging me to adopt them.
It saddened me a bit to have to ignore them but they weren't the reason I came here. Someone else would likely come by and take them home. Hopefully. Hmm, maybe I'll start donating here to give these animals a better life while they wait for their forever home.
Anyways, after a few more seconds, I finally spotted the dogs I was looking for. Strangely enough, all ten of them were shoved in the same cage, which was a decent three cells away from the others in the pound. I'm not sure who cages animals here, if it's animal control or the pound employees, but I found it very lazy and dangerous. Sure the cage was big enough for all of them but I thought the silver one was dangerous. Shouldn't he have been put in his own cage?
Speaking of the silver dog, the moment he saw me he bared his fangs and growled. It looked as though he wanted to kill me, which made me gulp; especially when I noticed droplets of blood around his mouth. I had to look away from him to regain my nerves and when I did I noticed the other dogs. They were oddly quiet and all of them were just looking at me. It was kind of weird but I shook it off as I breathed a small sigh and knelt down so I could be eye level with them.
"Hello again." I greeted softly, unable to hide just how nervous I still was. I tried to shake it off as I lifted a fist to my mouth and coughed into it to clear my throat.
"I know you probably didn't expect to see me again but please listen up. I'm getting you all out of here. I freed you from a death sentence," I briefly glanced at the silver dog who, at closer inspection, I noticed was really a husky before continuing. "so the most I'm asking is that you don't attack me once I let you out, alright?"
Though I managed to sound more confident, I felt just a little bit foolish. As smart as animals can be I knew there was a very slim chance any of them understood what I was saying. If anything, I suppose I said it more to make myself feel better than in hopes they'd understand me; not that it worked very well. It could have also just been out of habit, something most animal lovers do, or maybe I'm more lonely than I realized.
Regardless of the reason, the husky's growling only intensified and he widened his mouth to bare more of his sharp teeth; as if my words angered him more than anything. He obviously wanted to hurt me and seeing the blood around his mouth again caused cool shivers to travel down my spine. Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. As much as I don't like the thought of animals being put down for reasons that aren't their fault, I don't know if I could handle him; not if he literally wants to kill me.
Just as I was about to stand up, however, the husky stopped when the orange dog barked and growled at him. He didn't look at all happy and the two growled at each other for a bit but the husky gave in within a few seconds. It was rather strange to watch but what was even stranger is that when I looked over to the tiger dog, who upon closer inspection I noticed was a rottweiler, it nodded at me.
Did this mean he, who I got the feeling was male like the husky, actually understood me? I've heard that animals, especially dogs, can be incredibly smart but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't just a little bit surprised. To be this smart he must have been someone's pet at some point. I wonder if they are the ones that made him look this way. Hmph, I don't know why people find it funny to do this to animals; temporary dye that washes out with water is fine for a day, but this? This is just as abusive as beating them.
It took me a moment to get over my surprise but, when I did, I smiled and pushed myself back to my feet. I paused and looked down to the other end of the pound. Nobody else was here. Now that I'm remembering there was no one here when I came in either. Where were all the employees? Is there another door in here that I haven't noticed? Does it even really matter? I guess not. I mean I did already sign the form taking responsibility for the dogs so I suppose I can do what I want. The lock on the cage was a simple deadbolt so it wouldn't be at all hard.
After a moment of considering my options I made up my mind. Reaching for the deadbolt, I lifted the little leaver and slid it so the cage became unlocked. Unfortunately I probably should have thought through my plan just a little better because, the moment the door opened, the husky jumped out and began to advance on me again. Frightened, I backed away from the snarling dog; regretting my choice not finding help before releasing them. The orange dog barked again as he and the others also left the cage but it was the big blue Great Dane that came to my rescue as it jumped in front of the husky; blocking his path.
"Thank you for protecting me." I thanked, cautiously patting the blue dog's head as a reward. His fur felt surprisingly soft, not what I'd expect from dye; if it is dye and not some birth deformity.
Fortunately, aside from growling and staring down the husky, the Great Dane made no move to turn on me. This helped me feel more confident and I gave its head a few more strokes before lowering my hand. Taking my gaze off of the blue dog, I looked to the others. All ten of them had left the cage and were looking at me. The pit bull walked up to the husky and growled, which caused the husky to growl back but otherwise it was calm.
"So." I started, shuffling as I suddenly felt a little awkward. "Now that that's settled why don't we head on home?" I suggested and instantly got strange stares from all ten of them. In all honesty, seeing them confused was rather cute, though it did make the awkwardness I felt grow for a reason I'm not entirely sure of.
"Well, it's either come home with me where you'll have free food and fresh water every day or try to survive on the streets. Personally I'd rather you come with me, seeing as though I've already signed a form taking responsibility for you guys." I explained, hoping they understood. I watched as the dogs looked at one another before to the rottweiler. He seemed to be the alpha of the dogs and I smiled when he nodded in my direction; though it still surprised me with how smart he seemed to be.
"Great. Then lets get going; it will take about a twenty minute walk from where we are now and I'd like to get supper ready." I said, adding in that last part as my stomach unexpectedly growled. I suppose I never did manage to finish eating; not after everything that's happened. I blinked as I remembered something and looked pointedly to the blue dog.
"All of you must be hungry as well if you were willing to steal from a hot dog cart." I lightly scolded, though honestly found what the dog did pretty impressive; especially with the way it dodged all that traffic. As if the Great Dane sensed this, the dog smiled and its tail wagged, looking rather proud of itself.
I must have spaced out for some reason because a few sudden barks caused me to flinch, having startled me. Hiding my embarrassment, I looked at the dogs and saw a few of them turn their heads to the door that would bring us into the front room. Quickly understanding what they were trying to tell me I nodded and lead the way out. The other dogs barked at me as I passed them again but most stayed at the back of their cages; clearly frightened of the ten dogs following me. I felt bad for them but knew they were safe so I did my best to ignore it.
When I reached the door I opened it to let the ten dogs out before stepping out myself and continuing to lead the way. I saw Lisa look up from whatever she was doing as I began to pass her. She didn't say anything but I noticed her frown when she noticed the dogs following me. Her concern was understandable but I was willing to take the risks.
What I wasn't going to risk, however, were leashes; even if it meant one of the dogs would bolt the second they get outside. I especially didn't want to leash the husky; not after seeing how badly he fought against the dog catcher. I know for a fact that if I got close enough to him he won't hesitate to bite my hand or my throat. He seems to be behaving for now but I think the pit bull, who was walking next to him, and the rottweiler, who I'm sure is the alpha of this pack, is the reason behind that.
Still, I'd much rather take my chances at them running away or being stopped for having them unleashed than leash them. I hope neither happens and they follow me home. Despite how vicious the husky seemed, I was looking forwards to having some company from now on. I've never really taken care of animals before but it couldn't be that hard, right? Either way I knew my life from here on out would be a lot more interesting.
So, what do you think? As I mentioned earlier I don't really want to change much as I do like what happened and, unlike what I did for The Kitten Curse, I'm not sure what new things to do. So instead I just slowed down everything, added in more details and all that stuff. This chapter is based off of the original story rather than the rewrite; since I began editing it before I realized it wasn't the original rewrite. Either way please let me know what you think. I know there are some "meh" moments.
This is over 3,000 words longer compared to the original but only a little over 1,600 than the first rewrite. If I end up finding something that needs edited, something I forgot about, it will get done.