Goner

Chapter 1. The rest of my life

Waking up with the woman who you love is the best thing you could ask for. That is what Derek Morgan thought every morning when the alarm sounded.

He got up and let Emily sleep a little more, he cooked the breakfast, he wanted to surprise her, well, he did it all mornings. He loved see her smile when he arrived at the bedroom with her breakfast.

Today won't be different, but when he arrived she was not in the bed sleeping, she was in the bathroom.

Derek sighed and let the breakfast over the bed and knocked on the door.

"Emily, babe, are you okay?" she did not respond. She opened the door and found Derek

"Oh god, Derek, you scared me!" She yelled putting her hand on her chest.

"Sorry, but… I know you are going to say me 'I'm fine' but you aren't" Emily pushed him away and saw the breakfast, she got sick immediately.

"I don't want that breakfast and you are right, but I promise you after the next case I will go to the doctor"

"What case?" Suddenly the phone rang and Emily smirked "Come on! It's our day off!"

"Serial killers don't care about it" Derek raised his eyebrows and saw as Emily back to the bathroom.

They were in a relationship for ten months, they did not tell about to anybody, maybe the team could suspect something but they will never say, their careers were really important to each other. There were some days when that lie was a torture to each other, they had to hide every time he wanted kissed her after a case, even when she did hug him.

"When we are telling the team about us?" Asked Derek while Emily was got down the car.

"Again? Derek, I'm not ready for that, I do not want to lose my job"

"But they are like a family to us, and when we have kids, what will happen?"

"Who talked about kids?" Emily got mad, she does not deal with it. Dealing with her thoughts about the probability of having kids right now was enough.

Derek saw Emily cross the crystal door very angry, he was really worried about her, she was acting so weird the last few weeks. Derek was scared. He didn't want to break up with Emily, nor even think about it. He cannot imagine a life without her.

"Hey, hot stuff, what happened with Em?" Garcia was waiting for an answer that never happened. He just greeted her as always and went to the conference room.

"We can start now" Derek said sitting down in his chair. JJ refused

"Emily is in the bathroom, we are waiting for her" Derek nodded with his head and watching the files, they will have to travel to Florida.

After three days the case were really complicated, the unsub didn't let any proof. The team were so tired so Hotch decided to go back to the hotel and being able to get something new the following day. They were a little nervous, they knew if they went back to the hotel, they will go to another crime scene tomorrow.

Emily held his hand and Derek stopped in front of her door. She looked exhausted and he caressed her cheek.

"Hey, princess we are in the middle of the hallway" She smiled at him

"I need you tonight, please stay" He kissed her neck

"I will stay"

"And… I was thinking… it's a good idea tell to the team about us" Derek was surprised, she was risking her career because of him. "I love you and I want to everyone knows that"

"Wait, wait, can you repeat it?" He grinned

"I love you, Derek Morgan and I want to be with you during the rest of my life, glad?"

He cannot wait to kiss her and he did as she closed the door.

That night the unsub made another crime, but this time was different, there were something wrong, this time the victim was a man.

Rossi, Morgan and Prentiss were to the victim's house, they had to comunicate to the family the bad new. When they arrived Emily felt really nauseous, she had to throw up in the yard, she was thankful that Rossi and Morgan were not around her.

While Emily was in the yard, Morgan had to knock down the door, nobody responded when they knocked on the door, they felt something was wrong.

Rossi went to the kitchen and screamed "Clean!" but Morgan did not say anything. Until a shoot was listened. Rossi ran to the rooms, he prayed for nothing bad had happened. But he found Derek on the ground, bleeding.

"Morgan! What happened?" Rossi noticed he was shivering and sweating.

"He was holding a smoking gun, I didn't need more proof to know" Derek whispered "It's too bad?"

Rossi did not reply, It was really bad. A bullet in his stomach.

"Derek!" She yelled and ran across the room to get closer him. Emily held his hands under the Rossi's look. "No, no, no. Please don't let me"

Rossi confirmed his suspects in this moment, they were together. He tried to call an ambulance.

"Derek, don't close your eyes, you must be okay, I need you more than ever, are you listening to me?" She was crying and he tried to keep his eyes opened but it was impossible. The pain was beating him. It was unbearable.

Emily kissed his forehead and continued to asking him for stay. But he closed his eyes.

"No, Derek, you must open your eyes, our kid needs a father!" Derek didn't react and "Fuck, Rossi! Where's the paramedics?!"

Emily hated the hospitals and more than hospitals, she hated waiting. When the medics arrived Derek was still alive. She was looked the team, her family. They were a mess. Penelope tried to not cry but she loved Derek as a brother. JJ had a hard work taking care of Penelope and Reid. Hotch was walking around the waiting room and Emily was hiding her tears from them. She doesn't want they to find out their relationship, not now.

She had to act as a partner not as her girlfriend.

Rossi brought her a coffee cup, she accepted it and let him sitting next to her. Emily could not look at him.

He drank and started to speak.

"So… you and Derek… it's official" She just nodded "You and the baby will be okay, I promise"

"Yes, but Derek?" Suddenly the doctor showed up, they stand up and his look could say everything. He never made it off the table. Rossi hug her and she started to cry so hard. She was alone, and pregnant with Derek's baby. And Derek was dead. She held on to Rossi, she could not see the team break down like her in that moment.

"Hotch, I need you to take care of Emily" Hotch stare at Derek and sight.

"I need you to be safe, Derek, that job is completely different. It's an undercover work"

"Hey, I accepted it. I just want you to promise me you will take care of Emily"

"I promise you"