Still, a wrestling fanfic

Hey everyone! So here's another songfic that I've had lying around for about a year.. Wasn't sure whether or not I should post it, but I'm giving it a shot.. It's another John/Logan fic that has absolutely nothing to do with All We Are.. Well, I hope you enjoy it..

Disclaimer: Hahaha, it's been a while since I've added one of these to my fics.. But it's necessary.. Cena belongs to the WWE, and "Still" belongs to Brian McKnight..

One more thing... Rated M for a brief sex scene and vulgar language..

Okay, I think that's it.. ENJOY!

Still

John Cena sat on his bedroom floor, an open box full of picture frames next to him. There was one particular picture that he held in his hands. It was taken years ago, just when his wrestling career had finally kicked off in the WWE. He wasn't a new face on the roster anymore. He was John Cena, the Doctor of Thuganomics, the Chain Gang Commander, the WWE Champ. Girls swooned over him everywhere, and he could pick and choose who he wanted in his hotel room.

The older wrestlers would shake their heads at him every time he had a different girl on his arm. He was known as a player; but John called himself blessed. He was finally living the life that he wanted. Why not indulge in the women that were throwing themselves at him?

People had tried to change him, but he wouldn't have it. They're all just jealous motherfuckers, he had always said to himself. He was going to do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. No one was going to stop him. That was, until he met Logan.

John whispered the name softly, remembering the first day he met the girl that would soon change his life.

...

Flashback

John let out an approving sigh as he knocked back a shot of Jack Daniels. Both rosters decided to hit up a local club after the show.

"I still don't understand how you can drink that stuff," his best friend, Randy Orton, said as he cradled his own bottle of beer.

"You don't know good taste," John told him arrogantly.

Randy only snorted. "Whatever, man," he said, turning back to his own bottle. He turned his head when his friend suddenly let out a low whistle.

"Look at that," John said, and Randy followed his eyes. There, on the other side of the bar stood a gorgeous young woman with a nice tan and sleek black hair. He watched as the girl smiled and talked with the bartender before heading their way with two bottles of Coors. "Now that is my type of woman," John commented, nodding approving.

"Your type is anything with boobs and a vagina," Randy teased.

"Big boobs," John corrected.

Randy chuckled and shook his head. As the girl got closer, he chuckled even more. "Dude, she's off limits."

"Why?" John glanced at his friend quizzically. He was determined to nab her that night; she couldn't be off limits.

"She's an intern," Randy answered simply. "You don't fuck interns."

"Says who," John challenged.

"Says me," Randy stated matter-of-factly. "Remember that time I got suspended because that one chick claimed I sexually assaulted her?" He waited for John to nod before continuing. "Intern. You fuck 'em and they start getting clingy. Then when you blow them off, they do some stupid shit to get you in trouble."

"It's not my fault you don't know how to choose your women," John shot back, dismissing him with a wave of his hand.

Randy rolled his eyes. "Says the guy who'll fuck anything on two legs."

"You're just jealous," John grinned evilly at him before straightening up. Randy shook his head at his friend's antics as the intern got closer. "Hey," John called out to the girl as she passed them by. The intern gave them a quick smile, but she neither stopped nor slowed down to acknowledge them; she just kept walking. John frowned; that had never happened to him before. He could stop women with just one look, but he actually said hi to this girl and she ignored him. What just happened?

"Burned." John glared at Randy as the latter started to laugh.

"Shut the fuck up," John growled, resisting the urge to pop him upside the head. He followed with his eyes to see where she was headed. John's eyes widened when she took a seat next to a fellow wrestler, and he watched as she handed him the beer and they started to talk and laugh. "Hell no, Copeland ain't tappin' that ass before I do," John said as he downed another shot of Jack. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he slid off the bar stool and started towards the unsuspecting couple. Randy, not wanting to miss out on anything funny, followed as well.

"Cena. Orton," Adam Copeland nodded at the two wrestlers who had suddenly arrived at their table. The girl looked up at them, gazing at them expectantly.

John was mesmerized. He knew she was beautiful, but no words could describe just how beautiful she really was up close. And her silvery blue eyes were just so captivating, that John had immediately gotten lost in them.

"What's up, guys?" John was disrupted out of his thoughts and he gazed at the couple like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Uhh," John started, trying to think of something quick. "So Copeland, you gonna introduce us to your chick?" John mentally slapped himself for asking such a stupid question.

Adam and the girl looked at each other and started laughing, causing the other two to look on in confusion. "We're not together," Adam explained, motioning between himself and the girl. "This is Logan Parker. She's interning for the magazine."

"Hey, it's nice to finally meet you guys," Logan spoke, shaking both John and Randy's hands. The two just nodded and smiled at her.

"You know that kick ass spread I got in last month's issue," Adam started. "It was all her," he said proudly.

"Nice," John commented awkwardly. Adam and Randy exchanged glances, and Adam finally caught on to what John was trying to do. "So uhh.." John started hesitantly. "Can I buy you drink?" He could feel his eyebrow twitch when Randy turned away to hide his laughter.

"That's really nice of you," Logan replied, "but no thank you. I really should be leaving soon."

"Then can I give you a ride back to the hotel?" John didn't care that Randy was about to die from holding his laughter in, or that Adam was making faces at him; He was going to get her in his bed tonight, one way or another.

"Thanks, but I'm sure you still have stuff to do here," she declined politely.

"Nah," John assured her. "This place is getting boring. So what do you say? I don't bite, I promise," he said, giving her his best smile.

Logan giggled quietly and nodded. "Oh, alright. Thank you so much," she said, finishing the rest of her beer. John extended a hand to her, which she took, and he winked back at the other two wrestlers as he led her out of the club. This was just too easy…

End Flashback

...

The truth was, he didn't get laid that night. Hell, he didn't even touch her. During the ride back to the hotel, they were able to learn more about each other, and he realized how genuine she was. She was so innocent and pure, he didn't want to take that away from her… yet.

John had summed up the courage to ask her out, and shortly after their first meeting, they went on their first date. He found that Logan was an animal lover, so what better place to go to than the local zoo? It seemed a bit childish, but John would be lying if he said he didn't have fun that day.

...

Flashback

Logan was so excited once they stepped foot into the zoo that she automatically grabbed John's hand and led him everywhere. John didn't think the zoo would be that huge, but it felt like they had been walking around all day.

"One more stop," Logan reassured him, tugging on his hand playfully.

"Okay," John chuckled as he willingly followed her. "Where are we going?"

"To see the best animal ever!" Logan said excitedly. They had passed the tiger cage, the lion cage, and even the polar bear cage.

John was confused; what could possibly be better than those? He was about to find out.

"Ta-da!" Logan motioned towards the large glass exhibition.

"Huh?" John walked up to the plexi-glass and peered at the semi-aquatic habitat.

"Penguins!" Logan squealed excitedly, bouncing on her heels. She held her camera in her hand, ready to take pictures.

John gazed at the habitat once again, and sure enough, little tuxedo birds were jetting through the water. He couldn't help but smile at Logan, who was really enjoying herself.

"Look at them go!" She said as she snapped continuous photos. "They're so cute."

John could have watched her all day. They way her eyes lit up every time she caught a good picture, the way she would laugh at the birds' antics, and the way she would gaze appreciatively up at him. He could have stayed watching her forever; she was just so beautiful. Caught up in his own thinking, he didn't even realize when Logan had made it back towards him.

"Hey," she said, grabbing his attention by softly tugging on his hand. John turned to her and smiled. "One more picture, then we can go," she told him, and he nodded.

John smiled when he realized she wanted to take a picture of the two of them. With the penguins as their background, John placed an arm around Logan's waist and waited as Logan lifted her arm and pointed the camera towards them.

"Ready?" She asked, her finger over the shutter button.

"Yep," John replied, an idea formulating in his head.

"Okay," Logan said, as she started to count. "One… Two… Three."

Just as the flash went off, John had turned his head to kiss her on the cheek. Logan had yelped in surprise. He grinned at her sheepishly when she pulled away, but she only smiled.

"Sorry," he apologized, running a hand over his scalp. He hoped he hadn't scared her off.

Logan only shook her head. "Don't be," she smiled at him reassuringly as she reviewed the picture through the LCD screen. "It's a great picture," she said, letting John view it as well.

John grinned; the picture was taken at the perfect time. His lips had just touched Logan's cheek, and Logan's mouth was slightly open in a wide smile. It was cute. "You're right," John said, beaming.

End Flashback

...

John traced his finger over the picture. Who would have thought John Cena would settle for a girl like Logan? She was smart, she was funny, and she had a good head on her shoulders—nothing like the prissy, high-maintenance girls he usually fell for. And yet, they had lasted longer than any other relationship he had ever had. She was the one; he knew it.

Funny when you stop and think

Time goes faster than you blink

But nothing's ever like it was

But girl we've got a special thing

And all the happiness it brings

Is more than enough

But John had still managed to fuck everything up. Logan was a firm believer of "saving it for marriage", so that meant John wasn't getting any at all. He loved her enough to respect her wishes; after all, how many women out there actually did save it for marriage? Not a whole lot; Logan was a rare breed. Besides, John figured that sooner or later, she would give in. Why save it for marriage anyway? It was going to happen either way.

Not that they haven't done anything intimate; there were many times where they came close to it, but Logan would always back off at the last minute. He understood her insecurities; they hadn't been dating that long anyway. But even after a year together, they still hadn't had sex, and John was getting sexually frustrated.

...

Flashback

"Hey, man, what are you doing here? And where's Logan?" Randy said as he took a seat next to John at the bar. He looked around the club but did not see the girl that he inquired about. That's weird, he thought to himself. Weren't they always together?

John grinned goofily as his friend sat down. "Heyy, man!" He slurred, a sure sign that he was drunk. "Logan's not here. She's been in a meeting all day."

Randy only nodded, frowning slightly at his friend's current state. "Does she know you're here?"

"Nope," the Massachusetts native replied without a care as he downed a shot of Jack.

Randy could tell something was wrong. First off, since John and Logan started dating, John had stopped going to clubs unless Logan was with him. Also, the only reason John would go to clubs by himself before was to scout for easy lays and one-night stands. "You guys doing okay?" Randy had to ask.

"Just peachy," John replied, and Randy couldn't tell if John was being sarcastic or not. He waited for John to continue. "There's something wrong with her, man."

Randy raised an eyebrow skeptically. "What do you mean?"

"What I mean is," John said, finishing two more shots and slapping them down on the table, "she won't let me touch her. It's been over a year and I haven't fucked her yet."

"So?" Randy said. "I thought you said she was saving it for marriage."

"So? So?" John repeated as if Randy had just said something stupid. "I haven't had pussy for one whole year! I can't take it anymore," he said, swiping desperately at the bottle of beer the bartender handed to him.

"Dude, I think you had enough to drink. Maybe you should go back to the hotel," Randy tried to reason, but he was falling on deaf ears. He tried to make a grab for the beer bottle, but John pulled it away from him possessively.

"Nah, man," John waved him off. "I ain't leavin' til I get some pussy."

"What about Logan?" Randy reminded John, but the latter only shook his head.

"What about her?" John shot back. He put a smile on his face as he patted Randy on the arm and slid off the stool.

Randy watched his friend disappear into the mass of bodies on the dance floor and shook his head. Paying for the beer that he hardly even touched, he left the club with a feeling of disgust. He would not get involved with whatever was going to happen between John and Logan, and he definitely wasn't going to cover up for John's pathetic ass either.

John didn't know her name, but he had led her to his hotel room within minutes; all he knew was that she was blonde, had big boobs, and the little dress that she wore did nothing to hide that ass. Best of all, she was just as horny as he was.

John was too drunk to let his conscience or moral values inhibit him. He was hard as fuck and he needed release right then and there. Pouncing onto the nameless blonde, he pinned her down with his body as he ravished her mouth with his tongue and her body with his hands.

There was no need to get naked. All he had to do was pull down his pants and pull up her skirt, and he would be pushing into her in seconds. His cock throbbed with anticipation, and John positioned himself between her legs. Without a second thought, John roughly pushed into the blonde, causing both to moan loudly. Did he really give this up just to be tied down to one insignificant girl? What was he thinking?

What they were doing couldn't be called 'love-making', no; it was just raw, animalistic fucking. John could care less whether or not the blonde came, as long as he was able to get his release. He was so caught up in the feeling of it all, and he was thrusting into her so harshly that he didn't even hear the door open or feel the new presence in the room.

"John!?" As the couple turned towards the voice, the blonde's eyes widened with fear and she pushed John off of her, causing him to land on the floor. The blonde pulled down her skirt to hide herself, and John remained on the floor, partially confused at what just happened.

John struggled to stand as he hiked his pants up. "Baby, I—" he started, but was cut off.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Logan looked on incredulously, surveying the scene before her. She snapped her head towards the blonde girl on the bed, who laughed nervously before jumping off and running out the door.

The door slammed shut, but neither of the two seemed fazed by it. Logan couldn't look at him; she didn't know what she would do if she did. John, who had sobered up within those few short seconds, slowly made his way over to her.

"Baby," he started, reaching for her hand.

Logan pulled away from him as if she had just been burned. "Don't touch me!" She hissed at him, tears streaming from her wide, pain filled eyes.

"Logan," he called out helplessly as Logan started to rummage around the room, collecting her things.

"I'm leaving," she said, stuffing everything into her luggage and heading for the door.

"Wait," John begged, blocking the door with his body. "At least let me explain—"

"Explain what?" Logan stared at him with disgust. "I know what I saw, John. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that you've been cheating on me."

"I would never cheat on you, baby," John pleaded. "I love you—"

"Don't," Logan warned him sharply before he could say anything else. "The least you could have done was break up with me before finding someone else. I would have understood."

"Well, maybe I wouldn't have needed anyone else if you would just let me fucking touch you!" John yelled back, sick of all the accusations that Logan was putting on him. "You're a fucking tease, you know that? You're all up on me one second, then you say you wanna wait the next. What's the fucking difference?"

"I'm. Not. Ready. Yet!" Logan pronounced each word as if she were talking to a kid who didn't understand. "What don't you understand about that?"

John shook his head. "What you fail to understand is that I'm a guy with needs," he said, pointing to himself. "Before you, I could get any girl I wanted any time I wanted. Why do I need to change for you?"

"Well, don't hold back because of me," Logan shot back sarcastically. She scoffed and shook her head. "You know what? How about I make it easier for the both of us and just break up with you right now. You're unhappy anyway."

"Thank you," John's words dripped with sarcasm as well. "You're so thoughtful." He finally moved aside from the door and motioned towards it. "After you," he said with fake politeness.

Logan wiped the tears off her face before grabbing her luggage. She didn't acknowledge John as she wrenched the door open and slammed it behind her. John only stared at the door for a few minutes before punching the wall in anger and sinking to the floor. What the fuck did he just do?

End Flashback

...

After that, it took nearly a month before John had seen Logan again. And within that month, he was dying inside. Losing Logan had to be the worst thing in the world, and John regretted ever being in that club that night. Logan had been the best thing to ever happen to him; for once in his life, he didn't need sex or other women to be happy—just being with Logan made him happy. And he had let her walk out.

At first, John had welcomed it: Logan was gone, and he was a free man. He could party and have sex with whomever he wanted. He wasn't tied down anymore. But he didn't want to party anymore. Hell, he couldn't even have sex with a person without feeling wrong. He felt like something was missing, and it took him a while to realize that it was Logan that he was missing after all.

I know it's hard to believe

You're still the biggest part of me

All I'm living for

I still think about you, I still dream about you

I still want you and need you by my side

I'm still mad about you, all I ever wanted was you

You're still the one

To John, Logan was like a drug. Without her, he just couldn't seem to function properly. And some days were more disastrous than others.

...

Flashback

John was immediately escorted into one of the nurses' offices backstage. His match with JBL had been bloody, and although he had won his title back, John was still pretty beaten up. John thought back to his match and shook his head; it shouldn't have been as bloody as it was. He was never one to use weapons, but lately his performance was becoming reckless and sloppy. He just couldn't focus; not after Logan had left him. So to ensure a good match for the fans, John had to use weapons. He hoped Mr. McMahon wouldn't get too mad at him for all the damages done, but he would have to see.

John straightened up when he heard the door open, waiting for the nurse to fix him up, but it wasn't the nurse who walked in. John's eyes widened as Logan stepped into the room. Nothing was said between the two as Logan made her way towards him, setting down the first aid kit that she held in her hands.

Logan couldn't look at him. The cut above his right eye and the lacerations on his forehead were enough to cover his entire face and the upper half of his chest in blood. It was almost too much for her to stand. She said nothing as she pulled out a cotton ball and soaked it with antiseptic.

John could see her hand shaking slightly as she held the cotton ball up to his face and dabbed it onto the cut above his eye. John hissed slightly at the new, sharp pain, and Logan pulled her hand away immediately. "Sorry," she spoke softly, wincing. "Just stay still." And she continued on with the dabbing.

John observed her through one eye, noticing the way her eyebrows furrowed deeply in a frown. As she moved to work on his forehead, he noticed the way her eyes suddenly got glassy. He reached a hand out to cup the side of her face just as a tear rolled down her cheek. "Hey," he said, gently.

Logan sniffed and quickly pulled away, wiping the tear with the back of her hand. "Sorry," she apologized again.

"What's wrong?" He asked. It pained him to know that he had made her cry yet again.

"It's nothing," Logan denied, wiping away any other tears that threatened to fall. "I was just so scared watching you fight out there," she finally admitted, more tears flooding her eyes.

"It's just some minor cuts and bruises," he reassured, reaching a hand out to touch her face again.

Logan involuntarily leaned into his palm. "Are you okay?"

John shook his head. "No, Logan, I'm not." This would probably be the only time that he would get her alone like this. He had to be honest with her. "Not since we broke up. I can't think straight. My heart hurts. I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I can't function right without you."

"John, please," Logan pleaded softly, tears freely falling down her face. "Don't do this to me right now."

"I love you, Logan," John confessed. "And I know you still love me too. Otherwise, you wouldn't be standing here with me." He took her hands in his and squeezed them gently. "Please, just give us another chance," he whispered softly. "I won't fuck up… I promise," he begged, leaning forward in hopes of capturing her mouth with is own.

"John, I can't," Logan turned her head away before John could kiss her.

"Why not?" John frowned sadly.

Logan only shook her head. "I just can't," she repeated, breaking away from him completely. "I'll get the nurse; you need stitches," she quickly said before bolting out of the door.

John sighed heavily, a helpless feeling overcoming his gut. Was there really no way for him to get her back?

End Flashback

...

It's hard to breathe when were apart

You're like sunshine in my heart

I keep you here inside

You've been everything to me

You've been and always will be

The apple of my eye

John had no choice but to give her up. He still loved her greatly, but Logan was too hurt to give him another chance. One thing that she was willing to do, however, was maintain a mutual friendship with him, which John gladly accepted. It was better than nothing after all. And he still had that hope that maybe someday, Logan would give him another chance.

And I know it's hard to believe

You're still the biggest part of me

All I'm living for

I still think about you, I still dream about you

I still want you and need you by my side

I'm still mad about you, all I ever wanted was you

You're still the one

After a while, Logan had become elusive. John hadn't seen her at all, and he wondered if she even still worked for the company. He figured that maybe it was a good thing. If he didn't see her, then it would be easier for him to move on and find another girl. Another girl… That was impossible. Logan was the only girl for him. Nothing was going to stop that…

...

Flashback

John walked excitedly down the corridor towards the catering room. There was an extra hop to his step, which had people wondering: what was up with him? They hadn't seen him this happy since god-knows-when.

"Hey man," Randy nodded towards his friend. "You win the lottery or something?" He joked, observing John's extra happy behavior.

"Even better," John beamed. "Logan's here." Now was his chance to sit her down and tell her how much he changed for the better and how much he was madly in love with her.

"Oh," Randy's face fell. "John, about that," He started seriously. John frowned; that didn't sound good. "Maybe you shouldn't see her."

"Why not?" John asked.

"Well," Randy trailed off. He really didn't wanna explain it to him. "Nevermind," he said, shaking his head. He followed John into the catering area and prepared for the worse.

Once they reached catering, John scanned the area for the brunette girl and a smile broke onto his face when he found her.

"Hey guys!" Logan called out to them excitedly, and the two smiled back. However, the smile was wiped off of John's face when Logan walked up to them with a guy that they've never seen before. "Guys, this is Chris," she introduced. "My fiancé." At that moment, John could feel something inside him pang, but he hid it with a smile. "He's a big fan."

John and Randy shook hands with him, and while Randy was busy talking to him, John had led Logan outside to talk. "Fiancé, huh," John started, smiling weakly. "Congratulations."

"Thanks," Logan replied awkwardly.

"So you really love this guy?" He asked, trying to hide the hurt in his eyes.

Logan nodded. "Yeah. I think I do."

"That's good," he nodded approvingly. "I'm glad you found someone who makes you happy…"

"He does," Logan replied with a smile. "Thanks, John. I'm sure you'll find the perfect girl who will make you happy too," she patted his arm before heading back inside.

John sadly watched as she walked away. She was his perfect girl, but he ruined it. She moved on, and now he really had to let her go.

But who knows? Maybe Logan was right; maybe he would find someone else along the way as well.

End Flashback

...

If you love me

look into my eyes and say you do

I've been waiting all my life

For someone just like you

Baby after all we've been through

Girl I'm still in love with you

And I want you to know I do, I do

"Honey, what are you doing?" John looked up from the picture and let a sheepish smile appear on his face.

"Nothin', babe," he reassured, placing the picture back into the box. He pushed all thoughts about his past into the back of his mind and smiled at the woman who was leaning against the doorframe. "I was just reminiscing," he simply explained, picking himself up off the floor. "So how'd your meeting go?" He made his way towards his wife, resting his hands on her waist.

"Very good, as usual," she answered, smiling. She wrapped her arms around her husband. "But now I'm hungry," she said, pouting playfully.

John smiled and rested his forehead against hers. "What do you want to eat?"

"I could eat anything right now," she giggled. "But I think the baby wants Italian," she hinted, grabbing his hand and placing it upon her belly.

"Oh, is that right?" John raised an eyebrow at her and kneeled, bringing his face close to her swollen belly, placing a soft kiss on it. "Is that what you want, baby?" He asked her tummy, running his hand gently along the bump. His eyes lit up and he beamed up at his wife when he felt a soft kick through her belly.

"See?" She grinned as John straightened up again.

"Italian it is," he nodded.

"Yay," she clapped her hands excitedly and she leaned upwards to give John a kiss. "Thank you, babe. I love you," she told him, before pulling away and heading into the bathroom.

"I love you too, Logan," John replied, gazing affectionately at her and sighing in content.

He chuckled softly at the ironic way that fate worked. He had to lose her to realize how much he loved her. But once he got her back, he was sure to never give her a reason to leave. Yes, their relationship had been rocky, and yes, there were many times when they both wanted the easy way out; but at the end of the day, one thing remained: Love.

I still think about you

I still dream about you

I still want you

and need you by my side

I'm still mad about you

all I ever wanted was you

You're still the one

You're still the one…

So what did you guys think...?