Chapter One
Trains and Sewing Machines

Nick Milton was a product of divorce.

He had four brothers: Gabriel, Malachi, Michael, and Jimmy. His parents, Naomi and Metatron, were content with their large family, happy but not happy, and that was the problem. When Nick was a sophomore in high school they broke the news to the boys. Nick vowed he'd never put his kid – or kids – through that. Gabriel and Malachi moved away after high school, Gabriel never fit in with his family's ideals, Malachi wanted nothing do with them – period. Jimmy moved to start his own family, but always stayed in touch. Michael stuck around, being closer to Nick than any of his other brothers.

It was in his junior year that he met Anna. He was the linebacker on his high school's football team, the Red Devils, and though it was expected of him to date a cheerleader he still found himself drawn to the redhead.

The first time he saw her she was walking through the hallway, her slender frame engulfed in light denim jeans with a slight flare starting below her knees. Her black Pink Floyd Dark Side of the Moon t-shirt was a size too large, her black ankle boots barely visible except for the round toe peeking out. Her long red hair, almost copper in color, was worn straight and down, none of those silly hair accessories were worn. She had her head bent down close to the redhead beside her; this girl was wearing a purple shirt with billowing sleeves, dark denim bellbottoms, and a pair of Birkenstocks. This girl had darker red hair that was worn in a loose braid tied off at the bottom with a flower hair tie. The darker red hair girl whispered something to the girl beside her, the other immediately throwing her head back laughing, a laughter so loud it rebounded of the walls. It was like music to his ears. The two redheads continued on to class, now clutching their books to their chests, taking no notice of the jock staring in their direction.

After asking around he later found out the two girls were Anna Shurley and Charlie Bradbury. Anna was part of the debate team and FBLA while Charlie was the only girl involved in the Dungeons and Dragons Club. After some help from his brother Michael, he found out where she ate lunch and planned an ambush. Waiting patiently he spotted her walking out onto the quad, Charlie glued to her side. Wiping his hands on his dark denim flare jeans he made his way over, red and white ALL*STAR low top sneakers squeaking slightly. Now standing in front of the two girls, his shadow blocking the sun which had left their skin turning pink, he coughed nervously.

Charlie ignored him, a D&D book splayed out on her lap. Anna looked up, her olive green eyes standing out against her porcelain skin, eyebrows drawn together in annoyance. If the math book and paper were any indication, it seemed he had interrupted her homework. Again he coughed nervously; he could feel the sweat building up on the back of his neck, his long wavy blonde hair not helping a damn bit.

"Um… I know we haven't met before but I'm Nick Milton and I was wondering if you'd like to hang out at Coleman's after school. That is if you aren't busy," he glanced over at Charlie, who had abandoned her book, a smirk on her face as she watched them curiously. He wished she would catch a hint and go the fuck away! He turned his gaze back on Anna who had a perfectly arched eyebrow raised. Hey, it was better than her looking pissed at him.

Setting her book and papers to the side she stood up, meeting him eye-to-eye thanks to the bricks under her feet. "I know who you are Nick Milton and I don't know what your game is, but we all know jocks like you don't speak to people like me. So you can shove your offer and tell your buddies to find some other girl that'd be stupid to fall for your shit." Scooping her things up, Charlie following suit, she stepped around him, walking back toward the school entrance. The feel of a hand on his shoulder jerked him from his shock. Looking down into bluish green eyes, he let his confusion show.

Charlie smiled sympathetically at him, "Give her time man, I mean, you are breaking every rule of High School 101 by asking her out, but I'll talk to her if you're serious – and you had better be serious. If I find out you're just trying to make her look like a chump, I will hurt you. Dig?" Though her face was full of understanding, the undertone of her voice made it clear her promise was no joke.

"Ya ya, I dig. I am serious though, I really like her. Just…Could you put in a good word for me? I know I should be going after a cheerleader, but they're all air heads." Charlie snorted and rolled her eyes in agreement. "I'm not looking for that. I want someone smart and kind, someone like Anna. So could you do your best, Charlie? Please?" She nodded and patted his shoulder one more time before heading inside. Nick followed in her footsteps when the bell rang signaling the end of lunch, praying that Charlie kept to her word.

It was almost a month after the incident, and Nick was beginning to think that Charlie had been blowing hot air, he hadn't heard a word from Anna or her, nor had he seen them in the hallways. It was a Friday so Nick was stuffing all of his books in his locker, grateful that homecoming was next week. Sure Nick loved football, but he was ready for a break from after school practices and traveling for away games, he also craved the free time that would come with the break.

Not hearing her step up he jumped when he closed his locker door only to come face-to-face with pale skin and green eyes. Anna smiled shyly, it fit her better than the pissed off scowl he last saw her with. She worried her bottom lip with her front teeth, showing off a slight overbite that was surprisingly adorable on her, shifting her weight nervously from foot to foot. She took in a deep breath before slowly exhaling, shifting her gaze to something over his shoulder. "So I talked to Charlie, well she talked and I somewhat listened, and she said you just might have been serious about asking me out. So if the offer still stands I wouldn't mind grabbing a bite, though I'd understand if you had chang-"

Nick cut her off with a peck on the cheek, grinning like an idiot. "Of course I haven't changed my mind! Just give a minute to let my little brother know I'm not going to be able to give him a ride, and we'll head out. Meet me out front?"

Nodding, she turned and headed for the doors, looking over her shoulder with an apprehensive expression. Nick watched her go before rushing upstairs to let Michael know to take the bus home. Taking the stairs slower this time, he was still winded when he reached Anna and they made their way across the parking lot to his black '70 Dodge Charger.

The ride was less than a mile and the parking lot was full, all of their classmates having the same idea. Red and white decorations were everywhere; the cheerleaders had already ambushed the local drive-in in preparation for next week. They managed to squeeze up to the counter and order their food, but finding a free table was damn near impossible so they got it to go and made their way outside. Nick juggled their food on the way to his car, planning on using the hood as their table. As they ate a soft autumn breeze lifted Anna's hair and Nick couldn't look away, the sun caught every highlight in her hair making it appear two shades lighter than normal.

They spent their time in a comfortable silence, making comments on teachers and classmates. Anna almost shot sweet tea through her nose when Nick did an impression of Mr. Singer, their pain-in-the-ass English teacher. It was nice, it felt… right.

Finishing her burger Anna looked over at him smiling, a smudge of ketchup and mustard on the corner of her lips making it even more endearing. It was at that moment that he knew he was going to marry this girl, but that was just between him and the person he was praying to.

After that they were nearly inseparable, going to every school function together and cheering each other on at their respective activities. Hell they were even voted Most Cutest Couple two years in a row.

It was during winter break of '79 that he proposed under a street light in front of the drive-in where they had their first date. Naturally Anna said "yes" and they were wed a month after they graduated high school.

They both went to college in the fall, well community college, but it was better than nothing at the time. Anna went full time in hopes of moving on to a university to become a teacher, while Nick went part time so that he could work to provide for them. It wasn't until '82 that they began to discuss having kids, and by September Anna was pregnant. She ended up dropping out and getting a job at the hospital where her mother, Becky, worked.

The pregnancy was tough on her, her morning sickness lasting through the day and farther than the first trimester, but she managed to keep her weight maintained. It was ten days before the baby was due when it all came to a head.

Anna was off work for the day and started feeling worse than ever, and after calling her mom, petrified, they rushed Anna to the hospital fearing the worst for the unborn child.

Her blood pressure was sky high and the baby's pulse was abnormally fast, it was also breech. The doctor tried to turn the baby, but it was as stubborn as its mother and they had no choice, an emergency C-Section had to be performed.

It was at 10:49 pm that night in May of '83 when Castiel James Milton was born. His head was covered in black hair and his eyes were a deep cobalt blue. He looked just like his Uncle Jimmy. Everything was perfect as Anna cuddled with her son; however, the only thing missing was Nick.

When Castiel turned two things became tense between his parents. They were both working but Nick was always working late. Luckily they lived close to Anna's parents so Castiel usually stayed with them until one of his parents came home. Anna had her suspicions but didn't want to believe them; she had no choice one December night.

She picked up Castiel from her parents' house and headed home, Nick wasn't supposed to be home for a couple of more hours. Castiel laughed at his mom as she sang along (very poorly) to an upbeat Christmas song playing on the radio, but she stopped when she pulled up in the drive way to see Nick's car. Furrowing her brow she turned the car off and gathered Castiel up, trying her damnedest to demolish the feeling in her gut.

Stepping into the house nothing appeared to be out of sorts, only it was odd that Nick wasn't in his usual spot on the couch. Sending Castiel off to his room to play she headed toward the bedroom to change, but stopped with her hand above the knob. The sounds she heard from behind the door were familiar; anyone above the age of 15 would know those sounds.

Opening the door she wished she had worked a night shift, god how she wished she had worked a night shift. There in the bed they had shared for two years was Nick and another woman, one she recognized as Ruby, a girl that had been a grade behind them in high school.

Anna gave him an ultimatum, his family or her.

January of '87 they were legally divorced.

Nick got the trailer they had lived in, Anna and Castiel moved into a house that had a set of stairs leading up to the apartment above it.

Anna lost weight, lying to her family about eating, too stressed to eat. She continued to work and Nick's visits with Castiel were set up as stated in their divorce agreement. One particular visit was one that Castiel would never forget because Nick never showed up. That was the last visit they would have for years, that was the point where their relationship began to deteriorate.

When Castiel was 5 they moved again – for the last time – into the house beside Anna's parents. They probably would have stayed in their tiny apartment, but one particular day Anna stopped by the apartment to pick up a few things before going to her parents' house. She didn't realize at the time that the small space heater had a gas leak and wrecked the car on their way there. Everyone was okay, but the end result wasn't a hard decision for anyone to make.

Castiel started going to day care when he started Kindergarten. He loved reading, had a few friends, but was always picked on – especially at day care. Sure it got to him, but he tried to ignore them. It wasn't his fault that his family was different.

Around that time Anna started dating and one guy, Jim Miller, was one of the few that Castiel actually liked. He loved spending time with his son, Max, but one night they left Jim's house and never returned. It wasn't until years later that he found out that Jim had done a fake proposal in front of his family. One other guy, Dick Roman, was just asking to get punched in the face, the guy was an asshole… enough said.

When Castiel was 6 his father got married to a woman named Eve. He was invited to the wedding, but he decided not to go. The choice of going to a boring wedding or hanging out with his mom at a waterpark seemed pretty easy to him. Besides, he didn't really know them at all. Perhaps this decision didn't set with Nick to easily.

It wasn't until Castiel was 8 that he met the new guy, Caleb Fitzgerald, someone his mom had met at work. He worked for a company that delivered medical items to the hospital and after sometime the two finally started dating. Castiel was a bit hesitant at first, he wanted to hate the guy just like he hated all the others, but this guy was different. He had three kids from his previous marriage: Jo, Ash, and Garth. The family of four wiggled their way into Castiel's heart; Caleb won him over by including a song just for him on a mixed tape for his mom.

Later that year Castiel broke his elbow at day care.

When he woke up from the surgery everyone was there, including Nick and Eve. It took a few minutes to realize who they were. He was happier with the stuffed mouse that Garth gave him.

He was pulled out of day care after that, and was once again watched by his grandparents. It wasn't long before the Fitzgerald clan moved in and Castiel was being watched by the older kids.

There were fights.

Caleb was a bit of a drinker; sometimes he was funny, other times not so much. Anna took to taking care of all the kids, much to Caleb's chagrin.

There were lots of fights.

When Castiel was 11 Caleb and Anna married. Things didn't change much, not one damn bit.

It was during the fall of '96 – Castiel was 13 – that he made his first attempt. It's hard to remember why but one night he just couldn't take it. He went to the bathroom and downed as many random pills as he could and went to bed, hoping to never wake up. A few hours later he woke up, shaking uncontrollably and scared. Creeping into Anna's room crying he crawled into bed with her, just like when he was younger, and for the first time he wondered what he had done. Did he really want to die?

He had a seizure. He was placed on medication. He never told anyone about what really happened that night.

He also never questioned why Caleb wasn't there.

At some point during high school the Fitzgerald's slowly moved out. Jo moved to her mom's and ended up pregnant, marrying the father shortly after. Caleb moved out next, staying in a trailer down town with Ash and Garth.

High school went smoothly, Castiel got into a couple of normal teenage rebellious fights with Anna. Depression crept in every so often. Castiel found a fascination in cutting.

His 18th birthday came the day before he graduated high school. Along with Anna they met Nick at the county court house to have his court appointed child support checks terminated. Nick wished him a happy birthday and relayed a message of the same from Eve and Lilith, his 8 year old half-sister. Castiel invited them all to his graduation ceremony, and was answered with a "we'll see."

The next day found the stands void of Nick, Eve, and Lilith. Who was there was just as much of a shock. Caleb, Jo, her son, and Anna (of course) all showed up. Castiel would always remember this day as the day he cut his father from his life.

Castiel Milton was a product of divorce.

Edited on October 28, 2014.