ME: Time for a reference to a certain RVB Season 12 PSA, plus a little headscratcher of mine (which is probably because I take things more seriously than others).
"So..." Ezra said, "I've never been to a spaceport before, Kanan. What's it like?"
"Don't worry," the older Jedi replied. "Just stick to the plan: We go through security quietly and get to the transport Minister Tua's using."
The rebel quartet (Hera, flying the Ghost as usual, would not join them for the flight) tried to look inconspicuous as they proceeded to the spaceport checkpoint.
An Imperial officer, a Major and Supply Master named Yogar Lyste, stopped the five insurgents with a raised hand. "Woah, woah!" He glanced at Zeb and Sabine. "An AB-Seventy-Five bo-rifle and modified Mandalorian armor, AKA beskar'gam?"
"Not to mention approximately three blaster pistols and an energy slingshot, sir," said an Imperial cadet who pilfered two examples from Ezra and Kanan. "Plus what kinda reminds me of a lightsaber, only disassembled, as though to keep us from noticing it."
Kanan laughed nervously. "Oh, where are my manners? We're members of the Bounty Hunters Guild, just let me get our cards and weapons licenses."
The former Padawan of Jedi Master Depa Billaba failed to produce the appropriate papers for him and his crew, for they did not exist.
"You know what this means, everyone?" Lyste asked with a smile on his face. He enjoyed making the lives of lawbreakers miserable.
A female Stormtrooper pulled on a pair of disposable gloves. "Affirmative, sir. This is gonna be a cavity search."
Sabine groaned audibly. "Ah, crap."
Later on, Sabine impersonated a cadet studying for Level Five exams at the Imperial Academy.
"Wait," Planetary Minister Maketh Tua frowned, "when did graffitied Mandalorian armor become acceptable at the Imperial Academy, my dear?"
Sabine laughed. "Ma'am, spray-painted beskar'gam is the new white, black, and gray at the Academy."
Kanan sighed and said under his breath, "I knew I should have made her change into civilian clothing or at least spray paint her armor black."
Tua didn't look convinced. "And is this Lasat gentleman your real guardian?"
Zeb shrugged, trying to act casual. "Apologies, Madam Minister. I left my papers at home."
Suddenly a pair of Space Marshals stood up with their sidearms drawn. "On the ground, now! You two are both getting cavity searched!"
Immediately Zeb went for his rifle out of habit, only to be stunned. Sabine, on the other hand, simply sighed and surrendered.
"You, boy!"
"Yes, Mister?" Ezra addressed the Imperial agent.
"Your astromech clearly had no restraining bolt. This means a cavity search."
"NOOOOO!"
By the end of the day, all but Hera and Chopper refused to talk. "What's wrong, people?" Hera asked.
"Cavity searches!" Kanan hissed.
Chopper smuggly beeped before playing an audio recording: "Don't drop the soap!"
Immediately three Humans and a Lasat started to beat him senselessly.
ME: A/N: Considering I once had a peanut butter jar confiscated going through TSA security, you'd think the Empire would be much more strict.