I´m from Sweden and are using my schoolenglish here so I do wanna apologize for my grammar which I guess will not be correct. I hope you understand what I mean and can enjoy the story anyway.
This is my take on what happened after season 2 finale.
As the door closed behind him slowly I still was looking at my palm and on the ring he just so gentle planted in my hand. Seconds or minutes passed I have no idea. Still looking shocked and waiting for my heartbeat to get back to normal. Then all his words started to echoed in my mind. That he changed, he knows how to love me now, to be a husband, a father. He can be the man I always wanted him to be. The four of us to be a family.
And then he kissed me. How sweet it felt, so familiar, so good. My god I have missed his kisses, no one can kiss me like Deacon can. Not Teddy, not Liam or Luke, they don´t even come close in comparing. But that wasen´t maybe so strange since after all I have spent all my late teens and young adult life with Deacon. He was my first everything, he meant the world to me back then. So we have kissed each other in the past, on stage, off stage, during songwriting sessions. sometimes we even diden´t bother to get away from others before we were at it again, people usually left the room so we could have some privacy, or they was maybe just tired seeing us making out again and again.
A faint smile reached my lips before reality hit me again. Still standing with my hand out looking at the ring. Two proposals in one night, two completely different proposals, as night and day. If I call Luke´s a surprise I don´t know what word I will have to use for Deacon´s. Why do life always get so complicated when it seem to sailing smooth for once. Maddie and Deacon had to get to know each other real good and was doing fine, hell even Deacon and Teddy got along sort of. Luke and mine relationship was good. Daphne is the happy girl as she usually is. But now what a mess. The few glimpses of my daughters glances I saw before Teddy took them home to his place wasen´t happy ones.
Deacon´s words and kiss brought every feelings I have tried so hard to bury during my marriage and this past year with Luke up again. The only time they have been gone was after the accident but that diden´t last very long. I will always love him, need him in my life, not necessarily physically but of course when we are together together in every possible it´s magic.
That is why I was so selfish and made sure he was in my life during my marriage to Teddy, because a life without Deacon is unthinkable and I couldn´t stand it how much Teddy asked and begged to fire him from my band. We diden´t sleep with each other during that time but at least I know I got to see him a lot, talk to him, laugh with him and occasionally rest a brief time in his arms when I was sad or upset and he was comforting me. We rarely spoke about our feelings but we shared a few hot and full of desire gazes between us. We both know if I was divorcing Teddy, Deacon would open his arms and welcome me back any time.
If a outsider would look back over our past they would say we make better friends then we do being together. Leave all the grief, chaos, fighting aside and have fun and be happy as friends. That person has clearly never made love to Deacon or they wouldn´t ever say something like that. Making love to Deacon is so electrifying, intense and so amazing wonderful every time. No matter if it is drunk sex, quick and dirty or slow and tender. He has never failed at satisfied me whatever mood I was in. One touch and I get lost in the private world where only him and me matters. All my thoughts cleares my mind and all i can think of is his lips, touch and how good he smells. Not have that in my life is no option and I can´t regrett it either even if it would have spared me a lot of griefs and tears during the years.
Second reason for having Deacon in my band was a way for him to be near his daughter even he or she diden´t know it at the time. Now looking back I can´t believe I listen to Tandy and promised Teddy I never will tell him. Knowing now that the fifth rehab was working and the news of Deacon having a daughter was the one that straighten him up after that small bender he did have. Seeing him now how strong he is and what a wonderful dad he has become. If I only had told him we might had all these years together, who knows.
Looking up and see its getting late and I should probably go to bed even if I think I hardly will get any sleep. I close my hand on Deacon´s ring and bring it to my chest as I walk upstairs and make myself ready for bed.