Rolling Girl
Hello, my name's Ash. I hate my name. Everyone picks on me because of it. At first it was because they said it was a girl's name and not a boy's name. Well, anyway, this is my story.
It all started on a normal day, well as normal as it is for me. I woke to the sound of yelling, as usual. My parents hate each other's guts. I don't understand how it got this bad. They were so happy until I was born. So, I guess it's my fault. Or, at least, that's what they told me.
And, I'm stuck getting the anger taken out on me. I got out of bed and pulled on my school uniform. I headed out the window after grabbing my bag. No way was I getting beaten before school.
I made it to the bus stop last.
"Late as always"
"He's such a freak"
"Why hasn't he died yet?"
"Everyone would be so much happier if he'd died, but he doesn't see that"
The other students at the bus stop whispered to each other. They didn't seem to realize I could hear them. Or, they just didn't care at all.
The bus came. I got on last and sat as far back as possible. We headed off to get the other kids. It was a half hour bus ride. I stared out the window, before plugging in my music and playing something.
You might think I listen to depressing stuff. I don't. I listen to happy music, but it doesn't work.
"Did you hear that his mom and dad are gonna get divorced?"
"They aren't yet?"
"Probably gonna put him up for adoption when they split"
"I hope so, or at least they move out of town"
I turned up my music to drown them out. I hate my life.
Soon, we arrived at school. I headed to my locker. A group of kids snickered at me as I walked past. I opened my messy locker and grabbed the books I needed.
I closed it and walked to the roof. We still had twenty minutes till the bell rang for class.
I stared out over the railing. It was a pretty far drop. Perfect for a suicide.
Yeah, I wanna kill myself. I know I shouldn't, but I don't care anymore. I want to hurt people. But, I'm too weak to do it physically. I'll have to do it this way.
The bell rang. I went to class. I was the last one there. The teacher was always late. I got to my desk. There were bad words written on it and a flower was placed there too.
If you put a flower on a student's desk, it means you wish they were dead. Unless, they are dead, then that means you hope they live happily in the afterlife.
I put the flower on the ground and put my head on the desk, not caring if I got marker on me.
"He's such a loser"
"Why doesn't he take the hint and die?"
I smiled. They don't know I've been planning my death for a year now. They know nothing.
The teacher came in. He ignored me as did every teacher in this school. I was the misfit.
I was a transfer student. But, my parents moved here a month ago. My name is strange to these kids. They don't know where I'm from.
Soon, school ended and I got on the bus to go home. I got home. My mom started screaming at me.
"You little brat! What did I say about sneaking out!" She screamed at me.
I ran to my room and collapsed onto the floor, curling into a ball.
My dad came home shortly after. Him and mom started fighting. I started crying.
I looked up at my dresser. My blade was there. Mom and dad never came into my room, so I didn't hide it. I don't have friends so I don't need to worry about them finding it either.
I picked it up, twirling it in my hand. A minute later, it was pressed to my skin, drawing blood. I cut a line for every mean word I was told today. My wrists were covered in scars, but no one noticed. And, if they did, they just said I did it since I was different.
I cut for a few minutes, before washing the blood off and putting it back. I sat on my bed.
I didn't bother doing homework. My teachers gave me a zero either way. I stared out the window. Below the house was a park. All my classmates were playing there. I wouldn't go there. They'd beat me up.
I sneak out at night and play, but never in the day. I heard footsteps coming nearer.
"Supper is ready!" Dad called to me, pounding on my door.
I didn't respond. He walked away. I got off the bed. I snuck downstairs. They were eating in the living room. I grabbed my plate and snuck back upstairs.
If they saw me, they'd steal my food and tell me I didn't need it cause I was fat.
I was very underweight because of this. I sat on my bed and ate my food quickly. I needed to finish before them, otherwise I'd get beaten up.
I brought the plate down and ran upstairs again, locking the door. I laid back on my bed and tried to sleep.
I woke the next morning. I began my normal routine. I snuck out the window and got to the bus stop. As usual, I got talked about behind my back.
Today, something strange happened. My main bullies, Marcy and Lilac, actually tripped me. Normally they just jeer at me.
I felt them grab my bag and pull me up. The kids laughed at me. I caught the eyes of one student. He looked worried.
I felt Marcy pull my sleeve down and show everyone my scars. I pulled away and ran up to the roof. The kid glanced at me I ran. I made it to the roof and stopped at the railing.
I took off my shoes and my jacket. I climbed over the fence and stood on the ledge.
"Stop! Don't do it!" I heard someone call.
I turned around to see that same boy from before.
"Give me one good reason not to jump" I glanced over the building. It was concrete below me.
The boy walked forward, "You have so much life left"
"How? I'll be beaten to death at home before that!" I screamed at him.
The boy pulled me back and made sure I was away from the railing.
"Tell someone then" He stated.
I shook my head, "That won't work"
"You have to try. Don't give up"
"What's your name?"
"Locus"
"That's a strange name"
"Yeah, it is. But, since I'm native, no one bullied me"
"How can I stop the bullying?"
He smiled at me, "Be my friend. They won't hurt you if someone cares about you"
"But, you don't care about me, do you" I looked longingly at the drop that could lead to my death.
He suddenly moved closer and connected our lips. I froze.
"Is that proof that I care?" He wrapped an arm around my waist.
I nodded, "Yeah… that is"
We kissed again. Maybe living won't be so bad after all?
Someone actually cares about me. I can live for someone!