Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight characters. If I did, well, I wouldn't be filling out so many scholarship forms. I also borrowed the title from a song by Bonnie Raitt, which Adele covered and it sounds BEAUTIFUL. I Adele. The song inspired the beginning part of this one-shot.
Author's Note: This is a one-shot; it's slightly depressing, but whatever. I need to write depressing stuff, so I can be happy. Selfish? But whatever. It actually didn't turn out so depressing, so I am happy.
Background: This is after Sam broke up Leah, but before Emily accepted him. Sam is just having a rough time with everything. Majority of the things in here are true, but some things are elaborated.
I Can't Make You Love Me
Breaking up with Leah Clearwater hurt, but being rejected time and time again by her cousin, Emily Young, hurt even worse. I felt like I couldn't go a day without being near her. I had to see Emily just to know she was okay. There was just something about her. I know it was wrong; she is Leah's cousin, but ever since my transformation strange things have been happening to me. When I saw Emily, my world stopped and everything became about her. I wanted to know how I could make her smile and laugh. I wanted to be the one to bring her everlasting love and happiness. I had loved Leah, but not like this. I hadn't felt like this with Leah. I had never pictured a family with Leah. But when I saw Emily, I saw a future. I saw her accepting me for who I was, man and animal.
But as I turned off the lights and slipped into my bed for the night, I couldn't help but feel pain. Emily didn't want anything to do with me. She probably hated me. Who could really blame her? I left her cousin heartbroken only to want to be with her for some unexplainable reason. I quickly sat up in bed. It didn't have to be unexplainable though. I could tell Emily everything. I could tell her about my wolf and why all of this was happening to me. She would have to understand.
With my new found plan, I phased and ran to Neah Bay. I would just hang out on her porch until she lets me in. As I ran to Emily's house, I prayed she would just listen to me and not dismiss me as crazy. My wolf knew the way to her doorstep by heart now, and I was resting on her porch in no time. I went to Emily's window and checked on her. Her breathing sounded normal; my wolf felt satisfied, as did I. I phased and put on my shorts.
"Sam Uley, why are you on my porch at this hour?"
I wiped my eyes at the voice and stretched, "Emily…I came to talk to you."
Emily looked at me with her beautiful brown eyes and sighed, "Come in. You'll catch something out here especially without a shirt." She made her way inside the house and I followed. "Tell me what it is."
"Maybe it would be best if we go back outside."
Emily sighed in frustration, "Sam, it's too early in the morning for all of this. Just tell me."
"Emily, it would be much better if I showed."
Emily finally broke down and followed me outside. I stepped a few feet away from her and the house. I warned her to stay back, and I phased right there. Emily gasped and covered her mouth. She didn't scream. She just simply stared. She had heard the stories of the Quileute people. She knew this was real. She sat on the porch chair and closed her eyes. I came and put my hand on her shoulder. She immediately jumped and shook me away from her.
"Emily…you have to understand. The legends are true. There are vampires, and I phased so I could protect the people of La Push. When I saw you the other day, I felt something strange. I saw my whole life with you, and I wish I knew why, but I can't explain it. I'm sure it has everything with me being a wolf and you being my soul mate."
Emily finally looked at me, "I…I believe you, but I can't accept the fact you have feelings for me."
I nodded, completely understanding, "Can we at least be friends?"
"Give me time Sam," She got up and walked back in her house.
I sat down on the porch. I was uncertain how I felt. I was relieved she believed me about being a wolf, but I was still hurt she didn't accept my feelings. I was also happy she at least was considering being friends. I eventually left her house and headed back to my own. I was sure Jared and Paul were waiting on me.
I cannot begin to explain how happy I was when Emily showed up at my house a few days later. She was carrying a basket full of food with a smile on her face. She wanted to meet the others.
"They'll be here in a few minutes."
Emily sat the basket down and began unpacking it, "I didn't know how much to pack, so I just have some random items."
I looked over her shoulder, "Everything looks fine Em, just chill…"
"I'm not too worried about it. I'm calm." She smiled assuredly.
I smiled, got plates and utensils from the kitchen, and helped her set up the table. Jared and Paul soon barged in talking loud as always.
"Hey yo Sam!" Jared yelled.
"Something smells good.." barked Paul.
Emily smiled and turned to them, "Hi, I'm Emily."
"We know." They said at the same time.
Emily blushed.
"Sam talks about you all the time. Emily this Emily that. Emily won't answer. Should I go visit Emily?" Jared would have continued to mock me if I had not punched him in the chest.
Emily giggled a little. I took in the sound and vowed that I wanted to hear it over and over again. "I made you guys some food."
"She's a keeper," Paul reached across the table and grabbed two sandwiches.
Emily laughed with us and even watched us play video games. Her food was amazing. She promised she would bring more blueberry muffins for us tomorrow. I was looking forward to it.
Weeks had gone by and things were looking up for Emily and me. I was hopelessly in love with her. She liked me as a friend. I was sitting at the table, finishing off a muffin, when she came storming in.
"We have to stop…"
"Stop what?" I said, looking up at her in confusion. "We aren't doing anything."
"That's not what people are saying. I heard…I was at the store and some people were talking about how much I'm here and I don't want it to seem like that, so we should stop."
I stared at her completely dumbfounded.
"You need to stop hanging out with me. You need to go back to Leah."
I shook my head, "No; Emily, I can stay away from you if you asked, but I cannot go back to Leah. I don't want to hurt her by pretending." I moved closer to Emily and tried reassuring her that I felt absolutely nothing for Leah.
Emily pushed me away and began to yell, "You're such a liar Sam. You're just like Joshua running from responsibilities..."
I heard my father's name and I lost it. I was nothing like that man, if you could even call him a man, more like coward. I started shaking and I was angry. I phased…only this time, Emily did back away. She fell to the ground after my paw ran across the right side of her. I looked at her and howled. She was covered in blood and there was nothing I could. I panicked; I had killed the woman I love. I couldn't even phase back to get help. I heard Jared ask what was wrong and I replayed everything for him. Moments later, Paul showed up with Sue Clearwater. They took Emily to the hospital. I ran off in the woods, still couldn't turn back human.
Jared found me clawing at the trunk of a tree. It had been a few hours, but I hadn't phased yet. I was too scared.
Jared looked at me, "She's not dead. She's stable."
My heart jumped a little, "She's okay…" That information calmed me down quite a few notches and I was able to become human again. Jared phased and handed me a pair of cut offs.
"She's not in critical condition. They say she's stable."
I sighed heavily walking into the house. What had I done? I groaned and fell onto the couch. The house smelled like bleach. I looked at Jared.
"I cleaned it all…" he said softly.
I nodded and dozed off to sleep.
"She's asking about you." Stated Jared.
I looked up at him, "Really? After only a day?"
He nodded, "Yeah, she wants to see you."
The smells here were a mixture between bleach, Lysol, sickness, and death; I had to hold my breath for a while. I entered her hospital room. I saw her face and arm covered in bandages; I knew then she would be scarred for life.
I didn't say anything. I sat down next to her bed on the left side and stared at her. She was still so beautiful to me.
"I…I know…" Emily said softly and slowly, "I'm…I'm sorry…"
She was apologizing to me. What the hell? "Emily, no…I'm the one who is sorry." I grabbed her hand, "Emily, please…just tell me to kill myself…"
"What?" She pulled her hand away from me.
"I can't live my life knowing I did this to you… Tell me you hate me and you want me to go… Please…" I practically begged her.
Emily slowly shook her head, "No Sam. I…I don't want you to go…"
I was ready to beg her again, but I looked up at her words, "What? Why? I'm a monster…"
"You…you're not…" Emily shut her eyes and sighed, "I…I only wanted to see you here… You make…me feel…complete…"
My eyes soften, and I grabbed her hand, "Really?"
She nodded slowly and squeezed my hand as reassurance.
I kissed her forehead, "We'll get through this…"
Emily smiled as much as she could, "I know you're not going anywhere Sam."
"I'll never leave you Emily Young." I kissed her hand and laid my head on her bed. It felt nice to finally be accepted. I felt whole; I felt complete.
