A/N–Well… It's been ten years. When I started writing the RWB Trilogy I was 16. My writing has changed just as much as I have changed in ten years. I lost all the outlines I had for this story while I lived in LA and was homeless… so I am starting over with the second book. I still know how I wanted it to end and the main points in the story

Summary- Facing your past isn't easy. Looking your shame in the eye and accepting it as your own takes a lot of strength. Naruto opens the Door. Second Story in RWB Trilogy.

Parings- SasuNaru, some KakaIru, KyuubiKarasu

Rating- very much an R rated fic

Warning- sexual situations, foul language, self mutilation, attempted suicide.

Spoilers- Nah

Disclaimer– I'm at work…

XxXxXxX

White Lies

Chapter One

XxXxXxX

Lies are a social stigma that circulate through every society like filth swirling through a clean pool, universally thought to be bad without contexts. They blanket like snow fall over a village; slowly collecting, seemingly harmless… until you are trapped, covered and hidden by the white layers of icy deception. Reflective as glass their glare blinds onlookers. The only people who can save you are glancing away from the glare and never notice you being crushed under the weight of your own words.

We lie to ourselves so we can go on believing our own reality; we lie to others to keep them safe, wrapping the cold white blanket close around ourselves, aware of our bodies cooling and the grim hand of our own webs rapping around our throats.

She could feel the tightening of the hand and the coldness of her skin. She was surrounded by a wall of freezing false words, she built her fortress and she will go down with it when the time came…

He was finally going to shed his icy blanket, ready to let the warmth back in for the first time in ten years. When the time came he would be brave and let people see him with the flush of health and warmth in his cheeks, the real him.

If truth is black, secrets are red, and then lies are white…

XxXxXxX

Sympathetic understanding and pity; after almost ten years, not a single drop of anger has dripped into the still blue waters of the child's eyes.

After all the time that passed, nothing in the room had changed. Dust never settled and the small rivers of blood never dried, still red as the day they met the air.

"So you finally came back for me? Or have you come to rid yourself of my burden for good?" said the eight year old boy.

Naruto felt a shiver run over his skin. The child's voice sounded like he was in a deep cave, it gave the impression that at any moment a drip of water from a rock ceiling was going to ring through the silence between his words.

Looking into the mess he had made all those years ago Naruto felt the sick sensation of shame creep into his chest…

In the center of the small empty room was Naruto, younger and bloody. He was sitting cross legged on the floor leaning forward. His posture was due to his hands being pinned to the floor with kunai.

The eighteen year old Naruto stood at the door, Kyuubi was directly behind him, hand still on his shoulder.

"So this is what I left behind?" Naruto whispered.

Kyuuni's hand tightened before sliding off his Kits shoulder. Naruto Started forward into the room, he walked a few paces before stopping directly in front of the boy.

The Young Naruto looked up into the matching blue. "You kept everything that was bad for you. I know you thought that leaving me here was for the best… but you were wrong."

Naruto understood now.

XxXxXxX

It was a dark and rainy night. Another set of parents left him.

Eight year old Naruto was used to being alone. Every couple of months the Third Hokage would find another unsuspecting couple to take him in. they would pretend to be honored to old man's face. When they got "Home" the couple would ignore him, wouldn't touch him… sometimes they would do worse.

Finally the Third gave up.

Naruto didn't have much, the one thing he held onto was the old man's determination to find someone to care for him. Deep down he had a childish hope that the old man would take him, when he was out of options he would keep him and treat him like a grandchild. Naruto would have even been ok if he was kept with an air of exasperation because he didn't have a choice.

That's not what ended up happening. When the options were run dry the Third just pushed Naruto into a corner. He used the Village money to buy and furnish a small apartment and left the child there.

Naruto remembered the strained smile on the old man's face as he showed off the small home like he was doing Naruto a favor…

Then the door closed behind the Third, the thin line of light disappeared with the click of the door latch.

That night was the first time Naruto ever hurt himself.

XxXxXxX

The young Naruto slowly nodded his head, his actions didn't fit his appearance. He seemed like an understanding grandfather in the body of a child.

"I understand, you started a terrible cycle the night you were really alone for the first time."

Eighteen year old Naruto slowly took a knee in front of the Bloody child as he continued to speak, every sensible and understanding word stabbed the older boy.

"You were too young to truly know what you were feeling. You thought that the ability to feel hurt, to hope, to trust… to love, were the root of the problem."

The older boy reached out and grasped the Kunai that held young Naruto to the floor.

XxXxXxX

Naruto had been living on his own for a few months. He thought he was doing ok on his own. He felt like the hurt from not being taken in by the Third was fading. He thought maybe he was close to making his first friend.

It had happened only a few weeks ago. All the Uchiha's had been killed except for one boy the same age as Naruto. Just last week while walking alone Naruto saw the Last Uchiha sitting alone on a dock. The kid was all alone just like Naruto, so he approached him.

His name was Sasuke and he didn't seem to hate or fear Naruto. Maybe they could be friends. The hopeful feeling the welled up in Naruto was like warm water brimming over in a glass. All the pain was being covered and soothed in the water.

Then school started… Sasuke was there just like Naruto had hoped. But Sasuke was well known, He was a genius and everyone wanted to be his friend.

Naruto sat and waited, he sat and hoped that Sasuke would remember him, approach him. The dark haired boy never did. He didn't want the warm water inside him to cool so the little blond got to his feet, pulled up all his courage, and started to approach Sasuke. Halfway down the slanted space between the desks Naruto was blindsided by two girls that ran right into him, knocking him into the desk on his left. The Pink and blond haired girls stopped for only a moment to laugh at him, drawing the attention of the entire class. All the kid mocked and jeered.

"Oh were you going to talk to Sasuke-kun?! That's so funny! Why would he want to talk to you?" the blond girl mocked.

Naruto looked to Sasuke, the Dark eyes looked back for only a moment before a crowd of kids got in the way.

Naruto slowly pulled himself off the floor. He rubbed his head where it had hit the desk. The warm water had cooled. He felt so stupid, someone like Sasuke didn't want to be friends with a loser like him…

Naruto Slowly left the classroom, he could hear all the kids yelling their condolences to Sasuke, trying to get his attention. Unknown to Naruto, Sasuke hated this, he wanted to go after the blond but couldn't get around his classmates. When he did Naruto was already gone.

The next time Sasuke would see the blond he would try to talk to him like he did on the dock, but the Naruto would look at him with angry eyes and declare Sasuke his rival. He would push the Uchiha aside.

He would be a completely different person.

XxXxXxX

Alone in his apartment, alone.

Naruto sat in the dark, locked in a small room that had been set up as a training room. The crushing weight of despair came crashing down. All the rejection, and the pain. Young and naïve, Naruto didn't understand it wasn't his fault. He thought there was something wrong with him. Something broken. His ability to care, trust, love, all those feeling were at fault.

The Kyuubi woke from his deep slumber. Full of rage and pain from his own loss, from the memories of his loves death, of what the village did to him. He let his rage and hate flow through the boy that he was trapped in. Red Chakra flowed through the boy, down his arms and into his mind.

HATE

All of it directed at himself.

Naruto pulled out a Kunai.

All he wanted was not to feel pain. To cut it out.

So he tried.

Blood flowed, splatter, and smeared.

At first the self-hate and violence resonated with Kyuubi and his own feelings. Then slowly the boy cut and stabbed faster and faster. Soon Kyuubi wasn't able to keep up, his Chakra was weak because of his long sleep, and he couldn't heal fast enough to keep his host alive.

In one awful and confusing moment Kyuubi knew he didn't want to die. So he did the only thing he could to save the boy.

He granted Naruto's wish.

Naruto gasped, he dropped the Kunai he was holding. The metallic sound as it bounced off the wood floor matched the metallic smell of the small room. Slowly the red chakra that had been healing Naruto and delaying his efforts stopped flowing over his body, it held still for a moment, then two moments. Naruto panted slowly while he waited. Then the aura snapped back into his body, but it didn't go back into the seal. The demon energy felt like it has seeped into every cell of Naruto's body. It went into the cells then into his molecules and seemed to touch his soul…

For a moment everything was bright, white, good.

Then a pain worse than his cutting, worse than rejection and hate filled every inch of the small boy. A scream pure and clear broke the night. Below the scream, or maybe above it? Naruto wasn't sure as he thought back; there was another sound. A sound that filled the village. Every person heard it, it resonated and harmonized with every person that has ever felt sad or lonely.

The sound cut through all noise, even the thoughts of everyone in Konoha.

The sound of Naruto's soul breaking apart.

Suddenly the red Chakra formed an arm and hand, it reached out and grabbed the Kunai off the floor. Another red hand came from his other side and grabbed Naruto's hands. Everything happened so fast. Naruto's hands were both being pinned to the floor by the translucent hand, the other hand brought the kunai down, Naruto closed his eyes, as it stabbed through both hands and into the floor.

Then it was over, everything was calm. The red chakra was gone.

Naruto looked down at his pinned hands and felt… nothing. Slowly he slid his hands through the kunai, he held them up and saw there wasn't even a scar. The rest of him was healed to.

He took a deep breath and stood up. Without looking back into the room he walked out. Slowly he closed the door, he turned to face the old wood and peeling paint. The cool water in his chest was frozen.

Naruto Drew the Key from his pocket and locked the door.

XxXxXxX

Nartuo opened his eyes to darkness. He could smell a heavy metallic scent on the air. His entire body hurt, there was a particularly painful stinging in his hands. When he tried to move them it hurt more.

The air felt still and the quiet was unnatural. The entire room felt like it had stopped in time. There was a charged feeling to the atmosphere, Naruto recognized it. It's the way the air feels when a high level Jutsu was used. It was the latent Chakra in the air.

It was what was left of the red Chakra, it floated in the air, holding everything still, stagnant.

*Click*

The sound of the door locking made Naruto's ears twitch and his heart sink. It wasn't a dream. His split his soul. There was a Naruto outside the room, walking around with essential parts of himself missing.

For one moment Naruto felt what he remembered as anger and sadness. It felt like an old photo, warped and wrinkled. An old recording replaying… then it was gone.

It was OK, he understood what happened.

Naruto had already forgiven himself.

XxXxXxX

Narutos hand shook as he grasped the Kunai. He looked into his own younger eyes. There was forgiveness, Hope, Love. Everything Naruto wanted back. He pulled the Kunai out of the floor and small hands with a squishing sound of web blood. Before he had even finished removing the knife the Small boy was moving. With his arm still raised holding the weapon the small body collided with him.

For a moment everything was bright, white, good.

Then it was normal, and there was only one Naruto.

He took a deep breath and looked around. The room seemed lighter. There was a thick layer of dust on the floor covering brown dried blood stains. The air was stale and damp. At some point it had started raining. Naruto took another breath. It felt good. A small spring formed and warm water began to well up into his chest. It rose higher and higher until it spilled over from his eyes. It was slow and quiet tears. The rain pitter pattered on the roof.

Kyuubi was behind him, a hand rested on his shoulder. Naruto leaned back into the warm chest. Another arm came around his middle and held him close to the fox. The feelings of brotherly love he had for his bond mate were over whelming. Like sitting to close to a fire in a winter coat. The tears came faster, Naruto hiccupped. Everything the fox had done for him, given up for him! For the first time Naruto felt loved. A small sob, then a larger one. He couldn't stop. For the first time Naruto felt love for someone else.

"It's ok Kit, everything is going to be ok." The deep soothing voice reassured.

Just as Naruto was starting to calm down and relax he felt Kyuubi's body become rigid. He was about to ask what was wrong when he felt it himself. There was someone else in their bond. It was feint, like a whisper. Naruto recognized it, it was Karasu. He could feel the raven, not nearly as strong as he felt Kyuubi, but it was there.

"Whats happening?" The blond whispered.

Kyuubi held him a bit tighter. "When Demons Truly love each other it forms a bond similar to the Seal Bond that I have with you but more equal then the host and the sealed. Karasu and I lost our bond when he was struck down, he was so weak it shattered, which is why I thought he was dead. When we… you know."

Naruto Blushed beat red at the insinuation.

Kyuubi cleared his throat and continued, "We reestablished the bond. And because I am open to Karasu you can feel my bond with him though me. It's probably kinda fuzzy since it's my bond. You were missing part of your soul so the connection between the four of us was broken, but now…"

Naruto slowly nodded "yeah it's like he's whispering or far away…"

Kyuubi made a knowing sound "yes, we will have to practice controlling this so we can have some privacy."

Naruto was about to respond when he felt something else. It was like someone yelling to him from far away but their words were being swept away by the wind. He close his eyes to concentrate.

"Kit?"

"Shhhhh" Naruto hushed the fox.

It wasn't words or thoughts, it was feelings. Naruto gasped, it was like a stab in the heart. He bent forward, Kyuubi's arms the only thing keeping him off the ground. The fourth person was in pain, deep emotional pain. It was Sasuke.

Naruto sobbed, he cried and gasped. Kyuubi let him slowly slide to the ground. Naruto's own feelings mirrored Sasuke's and he felt the other boy become aware of the bond. Their feelings reached out to each other and resonated. Naruto couldn't breathe.

"He…" The blond heaved air into his lungs between hiccups. "He… he… loves me."

Kyuubi still held him from behind on the floor, he nodded against the boys back. Tears were streaming down the foxes face. The feelings of the two boys resonating through him and his Raven was almost the same as feeling them himself.

Naruto regained control of this breath, "He's hurting because he loves me and I left him there in the forest…"

He turned around in the foxes arms and looked him in the eyes. Naruto's eyes were wide and glassy, there was comprehension and shock in his blue iris, like he had just remembered something that was on the tip of his mind for a very long time.

"I… I love… him. I love him!" Naruto felt surprise at his own words. "I need to go to him!"

He ripped free of Kyuubi's hold and bolted for the door. Before the fox could utter a word of protest and blond had flung the door open and left.

He would get another chance to tell the boy… now was not the right time. He was about to find true happiness. Kyuubi didn't want to ruin it.

He Turned to red light and followed his host, then settled into his seal to rest.

XxXxXxX

Naruto's feet pounded into the mud as he ran, he pushed his legs as hard as he could. The wind was rushing past his ears. He thought he might have heard Kakashi call out to him as he ran buy but he ignored it. At one point he was vaguely aware that kyuubi had gone back into the seal.

Soon he was in the forest directly before the gates, he knew Sasuke was in the same place he left him. Through the convoluted three person deep bond Naruto could feel the cold dampness that surrounded the other boy.

He broke through the trees and saw the beautiful creature kneeling on the muddy ground with wide eyes looking straight at Naruto. Slightly behind him was the raven, leaning against a tree, being the anchor that kept Sasuke from leaving this spot. The Raven let himself be pulled back into his host to free his movements.

"I could feel you…" the kneeling boy whispered through the rain, his eyes still wide.

Naruto nodded "I could feel you too."

"What… happened?" Sasuke asked.

Naruto began shaking his head, the thought of retelling what he did to himself brought tear to his eyes. "It's a long… Long story" he choked out over his crying. Then he was running at the darker boy, and Sasuke was running to meet Naruto.

They literally slammed into each other in the middle. The force of their hug probably hurt both boys but neither of them cared. They held each other desperately in the heavy rain. They were both crying when they pulled apart just enough to press their lips together in an equally desperate kiss. Every movement of their lips was relief and bliss.

Through the seals on both boys abdomens their respective demons chakras were reaching out to each other naturally drawn to one another. They broke apart and looked between them to see the energies intertwining.

They both Laughed.

TBC…

A/N- because Naruto got his Soul back together all the bonds linked, right now think of it like a square missing one side. Sasuke to Karasu, Karasu to Kyuubi and Kyuubi to Naruto. So to close the box Naruto and Sasuke need some sorta bond.