Title: Speaking Confess
Pairing: Kanda/Allen
Rating: T
Warning(s): profanities, awkward conversation, awkward situation.
Summary: Kanda in denial and action speaks louder than words.
Note(s): continuation to We've Got It. Huge thanks to Aiy-puff for looking this over, all remaining mistakes are mine.
::
The first thought that came to Kanda when he resurfaced from the deep sleep was how the fuck is Walker, followed by must check on the fucker. It wasn't deliberate. It wasn't like he fucking care—well, maybe a bit, but he'd rather cut his little finger than admit that. It was some sort of sick Pavlovian reaction to almost a full night of constant vigil he had kept for Allen. To make sure the brat didn't lose his life. Surely, there were more dignified way to die than getting totaled by a weak-ass level two.
"Fuck if you don't look ugly," Kanda let out as he saw Allen trundling into the training room. The kid had forgone his shirt –definitely for the convenience of changing the bandage that now covered the whole lot of his abdomen. Getting in and out of your clothes every few hours for the nurse so she could prod and change your dressing while your movement was limited by pain was... painful, so to speak.
Allen favored his right leg, limping slightly when he walked. Body bent a bit forward in an unconscious effort to fight the pain. The fucker must have refused to take the pain killer.
"Why, don't you look ugly yourself," Allen replied sarcastically with a slip of a smile in his face.
"I don't look like I'd just fucking run into an akuma and came out barely alive."
"No. You look like you haven't gotten any sleep in the past week."
Kanda faltered. "What the fuck?" he said.
Allen shook his head and took several careful steps. He sat down beside the spot where Kanda had been having his meditation unceremoniously, wincing slightly when the movement jolted his middle.
Kanda mustered the best glare he could give. "I can send my golem to fetch matron now. You can be assured of it."
Allen shrugged. "I got my clear this morning."
"Getting your clearance does not give you the right to disrupt my private time and space."
"It doesn't," Allen replied. "But I want to anyway."
"What kind of fuck-up games are you playing, 'Sprout?"
Allen smiled.
Something inside of Kanda ached seeing that smile -it reminded him of the same smile the kid gave when they were in the middle of the storm, his lips all blue. Leave me here, the kid had said. Your chance is better if you leave me here. Kanda had said nothing to that, couldn't afford to say anything, and continued his march, blindly, with a weight of life on his back.
"Why didn't you visit me at all in the infirmary?"
Kanda snorted. "Why should I?"
"Because Lenalee told me you haven't gotten more than six hours of sleep in the week since we came back."
"She can mind her own business." Kanda crossed his arms. Irritation in every sketch of his body language.
"Well, I'm sorry if I assume you can't sleep because you're worried about me," Allen retaliated. His voice was calm, but his eyes were hard, no longer smiling.
"Don't fucking assume," Kanda bit out.
"Why didn't you visit me?" Allen asked again.
"And again why the fuck should I?"
Allen looked at him like he didn't believe Kanda had just said that. It's a look that said why the hell should I even bother with this git! Kanda recognized it from the many times he had been at the receiving end of that look.
Allen gestured with his hand and nearly shouted, "Because I'm worried about you, moron!"
Kanda expected the outburst, but he certainly didn't expect Allen admitting his worry. This is so fucked-up.
Kanda scrambled to stand. There were several things that didn't worth the pride of so called holding the fort until the last man down and Kanda could name them readily. He could stand a few bruises to his manly side, but dammit... he couldn't face this -whatever this was.
He was about to leave when he heard a low growl and was tackled from behind. To his credit, Kanda managed to roll over in time so he was not entirely helpless with his back on Allen. They tussled and rolled on the ground, each not willing to give up. Kanda rolled to get away. Allen grabbed him and followed his roll, hands like vice around Kanda's biceps. They covered a lot of ground like this. It went on for a while until Kanda stopped abruptly at the groans of pain Allen emitted.
Kanda was suddenly aware of the warm wetness seeping into the fabric of clothes that covered his hip. It reminded him of the minor panic attack he had that time in the cave when he realized Allen's bleeding had gotten worse. But this time, instead of panicking what came to him was anger. An anger that for once, he tried to contain.
"Get. Off. Me," Kanda grounded out, enunciating each word carefully.
"Make me," Allen challenged. His body was flush against the other man, a leg sliding in between Kanda's. His face was clear of pain. But Kanda knew it must be painful. Only shit-ass determination carried the kid this far.
Kanda buckled, trying to get Allen off. But the kid was like a sticky star fish, refusing to let off.
The swordsman gave up after another two tries and instead, hissed, "What do you want?"
Allen's face was mere inches from his. "I want to thank you."
Kanda didn't try very hard to hide the incredulity in his expression.
"Well, but that was before you went passive aggressive with me," Allen amended.
"And you're welcome," Kanda clipped, "Now fucking get off of me."
"If you would only listen to me carefully? I said that was before," Allen bit out, exasperated.
"Just tell me what the fuck do you want and leave me peacefully," Kanda replied vehemently. It sounded a bit too close to pleading to his liking. But fuck, he would give anything to get out of this. He spent exactly one week away from the infirmary as soon as he was declared clear by matron after a full night sleep (passing out) to avoid this situation.
Allen didn't make a come on, he lit a fucking fire by leaning in to lick Kanda's lips. Kanda reacted with a sudden jerk. A kiss followed that lick, so fleeting that he didn't have the chance to register the feel.
Allen was smiling wide, almost grinning ear to ear at the expression on Kanda's face. "You're not worried about me, huh?" he said, sarcastic.
The kid shifted three different moods in so short a time like a fucking wonder. Kanda schooled his own expression, fighting down the blush that must have shown in his neck.
There should be a couple of snide replies he could dig out and spit on Allen's face. But Allen made good of his promise and left him peacefully before Kanda's mind went back online. The kid walked out stumblingly, determination peeling off after he had no use of it, leaving smattering drips of blood on his trail.
Kanda was left alone, stunned and not moving an inch.
This is so fucked-up.
