Ok so this is my first ever fanfiction :) I'm so nervous, and i'm not totaly sure how this works! Supposedly i need a beta? I plan on making this lengthy, and it isn't going to be wham bam thank you mam kind of story! This chapter is just to ease you guys into it, and hopefully leave you wanting for more...

oh and i don't own anything stephanie meyer :( boooo

People say one bad experience should never taint your future ones. But people didn't know me.

At 21 years old, life had somehow managed to fall into a routine.
Wakeup, work nine till two at my local library (my safe haven), jog to the gym and then go back to bed.

I had never been one to complain; it seemed like this was just what was meant for me. At school, I had never stood out from the crowd; instead I was happy to blend into the noise. To add to this air of melancholic indifference was my dad, Charlie. It's not like he didn't try to get me out there and socialize-but each time I'd come back home, mentally drained from the lack of sobriety and personal space (yes, I was never a fan of immature horny boys) that each high school piss up party had to offer. The opposite sex had always been an accessory to my life, never an addition - in recent days I would meet (and on occasion hook-up with) guys after much coaxing by my friends, and then the walls would return and I'd leave the one night stand in the morning with nothing more than the memory of me. I kept a simple manta-Men should always be kept at arm's length; because if you let them in they would only tear you down.

But I had learnt some ways of unwinding, and it would always be music.

So tonight, as I could hear the supporting act play their set as I walked into the arena, I couldn't help but get pumped up for tonight and all it would entail.

"Bella can you pleeeease stick to me this time? I'm way too small and you owe me a shoulder up in the crowd!" Alice shouted. Since I'd crowd-surfed and deserted her at our last concert, metric, she had made me vow that I would piggy back her so she could get a good view tonight.

Alice was the one constant in my life apart from my Dad. She was my polar opposite; and yet she was perfect for me. She was already married to her childhood sweetheart, Jasper. But the thing that would always amaze me is that they could have stayed engaged for 20 more years and it wouldn't have mattered. Because they had each other, and that was what was important to them. Saying that, their ceremony last month could have been slightly more low-key - maybe they could have lost the life-size statues of Alice and Jasper…made solely from flowers. But that was Alice for you; ever the party thrower and never wanting to be outdone. I found myself sometimes wondering if it was fate that had brought them together, or if it was something altogether more powerful. I remember clearly the first time I saw the pixie with the beautiful face as I went to sit in my English class on the first day of high school-she had announced that we would be the best of friends. She always seemed to be right, though i never admitted it to her face. My stubborn best friend would have never let me live it down. If only she had been right about him...

"Ok ok Alice, but only if you'll stop forcing me to wear shit like this!" I bargained, not that it would make a difference. Since the age of 11 I had been her Barbie and she had been my Gok-wan, styling me in ridiculous outfits with shoes that did nothing for my natural ability to say hi to the floor every now and again (yes, klutz should have been my middle name).

"Fuck off Bella. You know that dress is made for you!" She replied.

"Yeah, made for me to wear for my next job prospect as a lady of the night" was my retort. As per usual, I wasn't entirely being truthful. The dress was nice, but it wasn't the dress that made me anxious, it was that it would have been better suited to someone more...But before i could go on with my inner thoughts Alice's screams erupted into my head

"Bella, it's our song!"

No time was wasted as we ran into the crowd hearing 'love bomb'(N.E.R.D must have got on stage whilst our little bitch fight occurred), Alice all the while shoving past grown men making them look twice. As soon as we neared the front, we both let go and started dancing freely, enjoying the pulse of the crowd and the push and pulls of bodies, when suddenly the wind was knocked out of me. It was only when I was outside that I realized I must have fainted, as I sure as hell couldn't recall getting there. Slowly getting my bearings, I began to feel a strange vice like grip around my arms...soft but not soft enough to allow me the freedom to move. Panicking, I did the first thing I could think of.
I kicked the guy in the balls.

"WHAT THE FUCK BELLA"

I would remember his voice anywhere, for it was perfectly ingrained in my head despite the 3 years since I'd last heard it. I twisted in his lap and turned to face him; just to make sure that my mind wasn't deceiving me and that this was really happening.

And that's when I saw him fully,
the man who had claimed my heart so very long ago,
my Edward.

Ok so i'm suree you guys are wondering what's edward done to make bella hate men? and how could she hate him! all will be explained in later chapters..it only gets worse before it gets better!

Oh and this story is going to have alot of music embedded into it, tracks mentioned here are so far

jigsaw falling into place-radiohead

love bomb-N.E.R.D

give them a listen:))

Please please review, i would love you forever :)