Ed, Edd n Edd Z: Fighting Dreamers
Chapter One: Muffin Button! The Eds' Secret Heritage Revealed?
NOTE: In this story, Eddy may act like Oolong or Master Roshi like they did in the Dragon Ball Manga. Some of the things in this story will be a little mature, and there are also a lot of scenes with violence so reader discretion is advised.
DISCLAIMER: The following is a nonprofit fan-based parody. Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z, and Dragon Ball GT are all products of TOEI Animation and Akira Toriyama. Ed, Edd n Eddy is owned by Cartoon Network and AKA Cartoon. I DO NOT own any of these shows.
In a long future. A long, long, future thousands of years after the defeat of Omega Shenron. It was a future Goku seemed to have for everyone in the next generations to come. The world was finally at peace. Goku proved himself and everybody to be the strongest fighter in the universe. But this story isn't about him.
Reader: Say what?
Yes. This story isn't even in Japan. It's in Peach Creek a little town near Vancouver. It was a town that was completely modernized by the effects of technology. You get the idea. Our stars of the show are three kids, Ed, Edd aka Double D, and Eddy. They are twelve year olds who are about to go on a radical adventure. Totally radical!
It was a winter's day in the Cul-de-Sac where our stars and minor characters reside. Everything was calm, and peaceful. It was very beautiful. All the neighborhood kids were outside, Kevin; the jock, Nazz; the unattainable love interest, Jimmy; the crybaby, Sarah; Ed's loudmouthed baby sister, Rolf; the foreigner, Jonny; the socially awkward bald kid, Plank; a hunk of wood. For some reason they are chasing after our heroes. What could they have done wrong? Let's go back a few hours in the past. This morning at Eddy's house to be precise.
"Alright, everyone! Line up! You're here for our Airline Cruiser! It's big enough to fit 30 kagillion people!" Eddy advertised. Eddy was the short, loudmouthed, and scheming leader of the Eds. The kids didn't seem very interested. There were few yawns and some of them weren't even paying attention. Double D, the kid genius with the black ski cap, walked up to Eddy and looked at him.
"I believe it was actually only 25 people." Double D corrected. Eddy smiled nervously and shrugged his shoulders. Double D face palmed. Somehow he knew the scam would end up in flames, but not like that.
Now the airline cruiser looked like one of those airplanes you see at an airport except it was smaller and more primitive. The seats were made out of hard leather and there were only three windows in the whole thing. There were three sections. One section for the pilot; Eddy. Another one for second class; those who don't pay for the same quality of service that first class gets. And first class; those who paid extra to get better service.
"So, uh, are you sure this works?" Jimmy asked. A piece of the wing fell off. Eddy kicked it back into place and reassured them that everything was under control.
"I don't buy it. But I'll give dorkster a chance." Kevin whispered to himself. Eddy held out a jar in front each one of the kids. Some of them only paid for second class, but the others paid for first. Double D led them all in and put them where they were going to sit.
"Ed, do exactly what I told you to do ten minutes ago!" Eddy commanded, clapping his hands to get Ed's attention. Ed was the weak in the upper story workhorse of the group.
"Yes boss! For I am the toiling Ed!" Ed exclaimed. When the kids were all settled, Ed ran behind the airplane and threw it as hard as he could. It was his job to give the airplane a jump start. It was smooth sailing (flying) from there.
Eddy spoke on the radio, "Hello everyone! As I said before, this is our Airline Cruiser. Sit tight, and enjoy the ride."
"So what are we supposed to do here?" Sarah asked, annoyed. Soon after about fifteen minutes, the tail began to shake. Eddy looked at the fuel gage and saw that they were on E. Eddy started sweating nervously. He took the radio again and sounded the alarm.
"Uh, there's been an emergency. But it's nothing much. We just ran out fuel and we're about to crash land. It's no big deal." Eddy explained. Then the screaming began. The kids frantically ran around the ship looking for a parachute.
"What kind of ship doesn't have an emergency parachute?" Jonny asked rummaging through the ship.
"This one apparently." Nazz answered. The airline cruiser then started to dip. There was no way they were going to die. Outside, Ed saw that the ship was falling. He ran to where it was, the playground. It was starting to catch fire and the kids were still inside. He stood right underneath it so he could catch it. Ed wouldn't have believed it but he succeeded. Though, he did sink a few feet under the ground. He dropped the ship and then got out of the dirt.
When Ed dropped the ship, it collapsed and all the kids fell out.
"Am I dead yet?" Eddy asked quietly with his eyes shut tightly. He opened his eyes and saw that everyone, more importantly, he was okay.
"Wow, I'm alive!" Eddy said awestruck.
"That was totally uncalled for!" Nazz grumbled, fixing her hair. They all fell out after the airline cruiser collapsed. The kids were coming after them. They weren't too happy about the whole accident. So they chased all three Eds around the Cul-de-Sac. This brings us to where we are now.
Just a few days ago, there were new kids to Peach Creek and they moved into the Cul-de-Sac. Their names were Brandon, Aaron and Kastor. None have kids have talked to them yet. They were even more socially awkward than Jonny! And he talks to a hunk of wood for Pete sakes! So now they were just sitting on the curb watching the Eds. Brandon was the brains of the group. He likes to analyze the situation before jumping into it. He has blond hair and wears a brown and red fighting gi. Kastor is average. He sometimes likes to act before thinking things through. Kastor sometimes thinks he can do things on his own and doesn't like taking advice from others except his father, a great martial artist. Though, he will never turn his back on a friend. He has black hair and wears a yellow and green fighting gi. Aaron was the muscle of the group. He will do anything for the sake of the group, even sacrificing himself. He has brown hair and wears a black and white fighting gi.
"From what I know from Ed, Edd n Eddy, no kid can survive being beaten up that much and no ordinary twelve year old can pick up and throw an airline cruiser thirty feet in the air." Brandon observed.
"Yes. If I didn't already see it before, they're definitely Saiyans." Kastor added. Aaron nodded.
"Yeah. And I think that means Sarah's a Saiyan too. She is Ed's brother-err, sister." Aaron added. What could these three be talking about? Could what they are saying be factual? They have evidence. And they could be Saiyans too.
"Ed, Edd and Eddy were chosen to be the main characters of this fan-fiction because they have something a lot of people don't have: teamwork. They will be the ones of whom we can depend on." Kastor said. They all nodded. The three agreed to tell them tomorrow.
Soon after the beating of the Eds, they met at Eddy's room.
"I can't take it anymore! I'm irritated with this s-shit!" Eddy complained looking at his wounds. As usual, Double D tried to look on the brighter side of things. But it was kind of hard to find.
"Well, Eddy, it could be worse," Double D enlightened.
"How, Sockhead?"
"Remember that time we went on that quest to see your brother and the kids were on our tails?" Double D asked, crossing his arms. Eddy nodded slowly.
"I guess. But this is definitely a close second. I still can't believe those lousy kids couldn't be true to the word for more than a week!" This was true. The kids went back to hating them after only a week. Eddy just made one mistake that caused them to hate the Eds again. One last scam. Eddy thought it was a shoe-in now that the kids liked him. There were still so many other things he had to buy instead of jawbreakers. When that scam failed, it was all over.
"Oh, and Ed, How did you catch the plane? I know you're strong enough to lift a house, but a plane?"
Ed shrugged, "I don't know. It wouldn't be the first time I did something like this."
"This series if f*cked up, man." Eddy groaned.
The next morning the Eds' failed scam was forgotten and the Eds have had their wounds healed (more proof that they're Saiyans). Ed was in his room, snoring his head out. He had a rough night. Just a few seconds later, his bed alarm went off. His eyes shot open. He scratched his head and then stood up. He left his bed a mess and went outside. He was still wearing the same clothes from yesterday.
"Good morning Peach Creek!" Ed trumpeted for everyone to hear.
"Shut it!" a random civilian called. Ed covered his mouth. He went to the center of the Cul-de-Sac and saw that Ed and Double D were waiting for him.
"What took you so long?"
"Muffin button." Ed replied.
"What?" Eddy queried.
Brandon, Aaron and Kastor were awake now too, and they thought now would be a great time to tell the Eds of their heritage. So after a long time of being outcasts, they finally talked to someone. Eddy saw them coming.
"Oh, great. It's the outcast! They been here for a week and they still haven't talked to anybody. They're even less popular than we are! At least when the kids talk about us, they say it to our faces not behind our backs!" Eddy analyzed.
"Eddy! That was a rude thing to say! It takes time to make friends!" Double D scolded. Eddy rolled his eyes. On the other hand, Ed loved meeting strangers for the first time.
"Hello!" Ed yelled, waving absurdly. Brandon, Aaron and Kastor just stood and waved slowly because they didn't know what to say or do. Should they just come out with it? Or should they wait a minute or two?
"Salutations, newcomers! I am Double D and these are my friends Ed and Eddy. You will find the Cul-de-Sacians to be very hospital." Double D welcomed, extending a friendly hand. Aaron eagerly shook it.
"We already know who you are…" Brandon said. Eddy took pride in that. He thought his good reputation succeeds him.
"… We've been watching you." Eddy's smile went away and turned into a scowl.
"What are you guys like the new neighborhood rapists or something? If you are, we better hide our kids. Hide our…" Eddy was interrupted when Double D nudged him.
"No, not that way!" Aaron exclaimed.
"Look. What we have to tell you is that you three are Saiyans." All three Eds were dumbstruck.
"You heard me. I tell you the truth." Brandon assured. They were still stunned.
'I guess this is what I expected from them…'
"I-I'm a what?" Eddy queried. Brandon took a deep breath so he could explain the whole story.
Saiyans are a proud race of fighters on planet Vegeta. They were terminated by the evil Frieza except for four: Goku, Vegeta, Nappa, and Raditz. Goku was sent to earth as an infant to destroy it, but he suffered from a head injury and lost memory on impact. From that day on, he was kind and innocent, though he was willing to fight and protect his friends from any danger at the age of twelve. Although, he has something most humans don't. Common sense. As an adult, he saved the world countless times and married a human woman named Chi-Chi. They had a son together named Gohan. There are many more generations of Saiyans mixed in with the humans. There was another Saiyan family too. So some people may be Saiyans without realizing it.
Eddy chuckled, "Okay. Do you expect me to believe that? You probably just read that off a manga and bought that shit!" Eddy denied, crossing his arms and turning away. Aaron smiled and shrugged his shoulders. That meant he did do that but it was true.
"Really! I tell you the truth! We have to train you for the new enemy, Ashike!" Kastor pleaded. Eddy smiled and shook his head. He tried to push the three away. He thought they obviously had too much to drink.
"Okay, you're done. You probably had too much to drink." Eddy assumed.
"But it's only 9:30 and the bars aren't open yet." Brandon said. Everyone laughed at Brandon's remark. He was also good at making clever jokes.
Now, Ed actually did believe them. He read a lot of Japanese Manga, especially Dragon Ball.
"I believe you! You have my word!"
"Ed, you've once again proved yourself to be a moron!" Eddy insulted. Double D shook his head. He was willing to try this charade. He also thought that the story about the Saiyans was very interesting.
"Indeed. You have my word as well. Eddy?" Double D agreed. Eddy was a lot harder to convince.
"No way!" Eddy criticized, "That's frickin' lame!"
"Please, Eddy! The world depends on you." Kastor begged. Eddy smirked. He whispered to Aaron. He was only going to do it on one condition.
"Nazz's panties. Take it or leave!" Eddy said loudly, but still a whisper. Aaron turned bright red.
"How? What I want to know is how!" Aaron asked, still red. Eddy's smile became even bigger.
"That's what you have to find out." Eddy retorted. Aaron nodded. He didn't know how, but he was going to get them. They need Eddy in this fight.
The others were confused. They didn't know what Eddy or Aaron was talking about.
"Eddy, what were you and Aaron talkin' about?" Double D demanded, crossing his arms.
"Muffin button!" Eddy responded. Double D scratched his head.
"What?" Eddy then told him that he agreed to help fight.
"Splendid! How about we meet in the woods tomorrow for our first training session?" Kastor suggested. Double D nodded. Aaron went over to Eddy and whispered to him again.
"If I get you a bra too, will you do it with joy?" Aaron plotted. Eddy had hearts in his eyes and he was smiling. He was even drooling. He held his hands out as if he was squeezing something. Eddy had a very perverted thought in his head.
'32 C… Wow… BOING!'
"You've got a deal. You certainly know how to convince a man!" Eddy exclaimed, giving him a thumbs up. Aaron tried to quiet him down, but they heard him. Eddy covered his mouth.
"You're hiding something, aren't you?" Brandon smirked, "What are you talking about?"
"Uhh, muffin button?" Eddy replied, smiling nervously. They all shrugged they're shoulders. Muffin button was going to be Eddy's new phrase to say when he doesn't know what to say or he didn't want to answer a question.
Brandon, Aaron and Kastor said they're good byes and returned home. The Eds waved too.
"I still don't buy that shit, but I'll try it for my own self-serving reasons." Eddy said.
"What's that?" Ed asked.
"Muffin button!"
So that was the first chapter of Ed, Edd n Eddy Z: Fighting Dreamers. Is the Saiyan heritage thing true? Are the Eds being deceived? And what will happen on the course of training? These are all questions that will be answered in the next chapter. So read, review and favorite!