I Don't own Naruto... wish I did though..

Orochimaru decided that enough was enough and it was time for revenge. Revenge on the Akatsuki that threw him out of the gang and left him with his half-witted side kick named Kabuto.

"Today is the day." He ranted out loud.

'The day for what? I thought you got your manicure yesterday." Kabuto said as he finished brushing Orochimaru's fine black silky hair.

"No... but did you remember to scheduale a new appointment?" Orochimaru asked thoughtfully.

"Yes."

"Good, good." He stared at the brick wall in thoughtful silence. "Oh yes. As I was saying, today is the day I am going to destroy the Akatsuki brats that dared to kick me out."

"Ah yes... who was that again?"

"Deidara..."

... Akatsuki Base ...

"Achoo. sniffsniff"

"Bless you," Itachi mumbled as he continued to labor over the frying pan. "Who do you think was thinking of you this time?"

"Probably Tobi, yeah."

"Hm." Itacchi hm'ed in agreement.

... Orochimaru's Malibo Dream Fortress ...

"I was think about a head on strike, followed by shakes and/or martini's." The battle coordinator said as he talked to Orochimaru.

'Deidara must have kicked him out because he was such an obvious poof.' Kabuto thought to himself.

"More then likely," Zetsu said from just under the ground.

"..." ... "You could hear what I was thinking?"

"No, but I can read what the author is typing."

"..." ... "Well that's not fair."

"I'm not saying that it is. Just the fact that I know what you are going to say before you say it gives me a large advantage over both you, Orochimaru, the rest of the Akatsuki, and even the writer."

"Wait... what?" I said, or rather typed.

"Don't ask..." Zetsu mumbled as he dissappeared underneath the ground.

"Whatever," I ressumed the plotline.

"Perfect, then that is how we'll do it!!" Orochimaru declared as he turned around and faced Kabuto.

"Do what?"

"I won't tell you if you didn't even bother to pay attention to me." Orochimaru turned and pouted.

"…"

"Well, It's time to put this plan into action!" Orochimaru said energetically.

"Oooo-ooo-kay then." Kabuto began to pack the hair supplies into his hair and make-up bag and proceeded to open the door. "After you m'Lord."

Face gleaming with pride, and obvious sign to Kabuto that Orochimaru will be needing some face powder soon, Orochimaru stepped out into the sunlight and began the teacherous jounery to the Akatsuki hideout.

…….. 15.23 secounds later …….

Out of breath and very tired with sweat streaming done his normally made-up-with-make-up face, Orochimaru rang the doorbell of the Akatsuki and dropped a small paper bag package on the flowery welcome mat, lit it aflame, rushed back into his own hideout, and slammed the door tightly.

"Hello?" Deidara said as he opened the door. Smelling an odor most foul, he looked done and saw a flaming bag at his foot. "MARTIANS!!" He yelled as he stamped violently on the bag, attempting to put the fire out.

Squuuiiisssshhh

Deidara looked down at his feet and groaned. "Not again!." He curled his hand into a fist and looked in the general direction across the street at the small spa resort. "OROCHIMARU, WHEN I FINALLY FIND YOU… I'LL, I'LL…. ARGH" He slammed the door and went to the bathroom to clean off his shoes.

Across the street at Poofie's Spa Palace….

"Mwhahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa-mwhahahahahahaahhaahhaahaaaa" Orochimaru laughed like a drunken chibi. "Revenge is o so sweet!"

Yeaaa.. I was bored, and with nothing to do after my surgery, I wrote this to keep me amused.